Every week the crew here at Bikernet experiences another shotgun-quick web capability. Our bitchin’ benefit to you is the non-stop info and entertainment, delivery speed and unlimited report size. If we want to run something, anything, there’s nothing stopping us. The Digital Gangster, Bikernet web master, shot that process in the ass this week. He made is possible for us meager writers and editors to publish/launch tech articles, Events, Fiction and Special reports without waiting for his sorry ass to sober up.

Let’s get to the news. This afternoon we’ve planned a report on the new Victory model, the Kingpin, and a quick Amazing Shrunken FXR tech will see the light of day on Bikernet. What’s next? Frank Kaisler reports on the 100th Anniversary Celebration in Milwaukee, another bike build is hanging in the wings and Crazy Horse reports on her first run to Sturgis. Next week we hope to kick off the Custom Chrome Goliath Bike Build with multiple reports and enough shots to demonstrate every aspect of the build process from the inner-tubes up. Hang on:

H-D POWERED MUDBOATS–Now check this out! Harley EVO powered mudboats. Mudboats are built for the purpose of getting into very low water areas for the purpose of fishing or hunting. The engines are mounted in the boat and the driveshaft extends over the transom so the prop is just under the water. This allows the boat to run in just inches of water. If it floats, it goes.

This Minnesota manufacturer claims to “Dominate the Swamp”. WWW.FISHERBEAVERTAIL.COMWhat a combination, beavers and Harleys, not like it hasn’t been thought of before.

Illustration from Chris Kallas. Check his new Panhead limited edition print for sale in the Gulch under art prints.

MOTORCYCLE FICTION WRITERS–We’ve proudly published several new heartwarming stories recently. We look forward to submissions, although it sometimes take me a couple of weeks to read new material. I respond to every writer, so if you don’t hear from me feel free to resubmit your story. We receive a ton of spam and ocassionally trash a legitimate e-mail in the process. Don’t give up.

HORSE SUBSCRIPTION COMPLAINTS–Once every five minutes we receive complaint from hungry Horse readers who were sucker enough to annie up for a subscription. Aren’t you aware of the caliber of the HORSE staff. Hell, they just started a cager mag.

I’m kidding, but if you’ve ordered a sub here’s the deal from Geno himself, “Takes 6 weeks, I’m sure he was in the middle between 2 issues.Call the number (877) 286-0127 that’s printedin the mag. Those folks get the dough for handling sub probsnot us. We are too busy fighting for justice and the ‘merican way,”Geno.

BIKERNET HIGH SCHOOL SWEETHEARTS–Two high school sweethearts went out for four years. They enjoyed losing their virginity to each other in 10th grade. They wanted both to go to the same college but, the girl was accepted to a college on the East Coast, and the guy went to a college on the West Coast. They agreed to be faithful to each other and to spend anytime they could together.

As time went on, the guy would call the girl and she would never be in, and she took weeks to reply to his letters. She took days to return his emails.

Finally, she confessed that she wanted to date around. He didn’t take this very well and increased his calls, letters, and e-mails trying to win back her love. She became annoyed with his persistence. She had a new boyfriend. She wanted to get the high school sweetheart off her back. So, she took a Polaroid of her sucking her new boyfriend’s unmentionables and e-mailed it the old boyfriend with a message: “I found a new boyfriend, leave me alone.”

Of course, the guy was devastated, but he was also pissed. So, he typed a note to enclose with the photo before forwarding it: “Dear Mom and Dad, having a great time at college, please send more money! I’m getting pretty desperate!” He then mailed the picture to her parents.

–from A. Friedman

YOU MIGHT BE A YUPPIE BIKER IF…
If you drink cappuccino instead of beer.
If you can?t figure out why the battery on your new bike won’t stay charged.
If your trailer has more miles on it than your bike.
If your leathers still have creases.
If you don’t ride your bike to work because it scuffs your penny loafers.
If you move your bike and the grass is brown under the wheels.
If your tattoos wash off.
If you have doubled the weight of your bike with bolt on chrome.
If you have never kick started a bike before.
If you buy bikes as investments.
If you refer to your bike as your “toy”.
If you wear a full face helmet.
If you wear a helmet.
If you wear earplugs.
If you really believe that there are bikes that come customized. from the factory.
If the last time you went to the Harley dealer you came home. with golf balls and a toilet seat.
If your Harley shirt has a collar.
If it’s not fun to ride unless someone sees you.
If you don’t ride in the rain.
If you can’t find your oil filter.
If you think any motorcycle is too loud.
If your pony tail comes off with your cap.
If you leave your garage door open just so people can see your bike.
If you need a biker lingo book.
If your a HOG member and think your an outlaw.
If you think a wrench is a bitchy woman.
If when you buy your bike you start calling everyone “bro”.
If you stop 30 miles from Sturgis to unload your bike so you can ride in.
If you think the models in the catalogs are what bikers are suppose to look like.
If you worry about what bikers are suppose to look like.
If you read V-Twin.
If other people you consider bikers scare you.

–from Rogue

THE JANKLOW PAPERS CONTINUE– The Monday prior to this article Janklow held a press conference and stated how sorry he was about the accident and didn?t want to talk about it because he would cry. YEA SURE! He couldn?t even remember the name of the man he killed!

It is obvious that he is calling in favors and releasing info that he thinks will help him. Now he is calling on the Good People of South Dakota. This is NOT A POPULARITY CONTEST. It is about a man with no respect for the law Killing Another Man.

He was Speeding, He did Run The Stop Sign, and He Did Kill Randy Scott. AND HE HAS PLED NOT GUILTY. Give Me A Break.

We all know about his driving record and another example him smoking cigarettes in the Capitol while others were banned from doing so. Just another item to show he feels the law does not apply to him while he want to be harsh on other and put them in Boot Camps and Prisons.

PLEASE Everyone stay after this and do Not Let Janklow Get Away With Killing Randy Scott

–ROGUE

SAD SEPTEMBER–Saying goodbye is always tough and no exception even if to a bird. I lost my parrot, Billy, a few days ago, just adding to crap that made September the worst month of the year for me. I raised Billy from a baby and enjoyed her for twelve years. Two weeks earlier, my little cockatiel, Gordy, died from being egg-bound. Poor little thing didn’t know she was too old to keep laying eggs.

One of my sons was hit from behind on the freeway two days ago. He walked away from a totaled car with just a scratch. This is the same son that had a party the last day of vacancy in an apartment I rented for him. Things got out of hand, a window was busted, doors kicked in and holes punched in the walls, causing me money loss and stress. These things plus a couple more mishaps made September pretty fucked up. But today as I write this, I am so grateful that my son is fine, that I had my birds to enjoy at least for a while, and if these are the worst of my troubles, I’m damn lucky.

Our good friend Chris Hill went down on his bike last Sunday. He’s in critical, but stable condition. From all accounts, he should recover, but will have a difficult time for a while. Life is so fragile and sometimes so taken for granted. We each have control over our own happiness. Don?t sweat the little things people, and please don?t wait till tomorrow to let the ones you love, know you love them. You may not get the chance.

Incase you haven’t noticed, there was no Caribbean Report last week, nor will there be one this week. Jose is having his own personal battles in Puerto Rico and will be out of touch till he gets things sorted out. I wish him luck and high hopes that everything works out peacefully.

~Layla

BRAND NEW CUSTOM CHROME CATALOG RELEASED– Custom Chrome ? and Chrome Specialties ? have joined forces to bring you the most comprehensive product offering in the Harley-Davidson ? aftermarket! At over 1,400 pages and over 25,000 part numbers, our 2003 Catalog features everything from nuts & bolts to HR3 bike kits, and sets the NEW industry standard.

ONLY $9.95 + 6.95 Shipping**

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THE OZARK ED REPORT–I finally got my Shovelhead on the road. I took it to hot springs HOG rally for its inaugural voyage, and had just a few tiny little issues to deal with. Some guy took a photo and gave me a card with www.smokingbarrels.com, event code 1274, photo number 0449.

It will be a few days before it’s up but let me know how you like it.

–Ozark Ed

THE RED BARON ROLLS– Joel Wilson built the Baron. His email is = joelwilson7735@msn.com. His Business is = S. I. C. Motorcycles – 512-203-0641

You should see the new creation he has started attached is a picture of his LOGO as well as a few pictures of the Baron – (he beat Jessie James in several Bike Shows)

NEVER ENOUGH BLONDE JOKES–To prepare for his big date, a young man went up on to the roof of his apartment building in order to tan himself. Not wanting any tan lines to show, he sunbathed in the nude. Unfortunately, the young man fell asleep while on the roof, and managed to get a sunburn on his “tool of the trade”.

He was determined not to miss his date, so he put some lotion on his manhood and wrapped it in gauze.

The blonde showed up for the date at his apartment, and the young man treated her to a home cooked dinner, after which they went into the living room to watch a movie.

During the movie, however, the young man’s sunburn started acting up again. He asked to be excused, went into the kitchen, and poured a tall, cool glass of milk. He then placed his sunburned member in the milk and experienced immediate relief of his pain.

The blonde, however, wondering what he was doing, wandered into the kitchen to see him with his johnson immersed in a glass of milk. Upon seeing this, the blonde exclaimed, “So that’s how you guys load those things!”

–from Rogue

THE MILLER REPORT–One down and four to go.

–Ken Miller

CHOPPER OPS SPECIALS–Over here at Chopper Ops, we know what it’s like to work for a paycheck. We do it everyday. We know what it’s like to be a small business looking for a break. We know what it’s like to have to put shoes on our kids feet, and take care of our families. Like you, we take great pride in all of these things. Call Chopper Ops and find out for yourself why were a company you should consider. Special note: Chopper Ops now has 18 x 10.5 Forged Wheels. You will not believe our prices or how long you won’t have to wait!!!

Chopper Ops: 1.562.795.0294
Sales and Customer Relations: 1.562.715.6166
Sales and Technical Support: 1.562.715.8370

THE FERRYMAN PROJECT–Well here is my scoot with Part 2 of the customizing.Stage 1 was Stage 1 and Screaming Eagle slash cut and the Thunderstar wheels. Stage 2 is the paintwork. and Stage 3 well who knows.All suggestions will be considered.

Ride Safe
Ride Free

–The Ferryman

WEEKLY PARTS SEARCH–Hey Bandit, I look forward to your web site. Keep upthe good work bro! I’ve been trying to get a line onthe Rigid Air Ride System that Indian Larry used onthe Great Biker Build-Off vs. P. Yaffe. I’ve e-mailedthem (Gasoline Alley)and no response. Do you knowsomeone or website I can contact for information?

Thanks man!
Steve

INDIAN LAYS OFF “ALL” WORKERS–SAN JOSE, Calif. (AP) – Indian Motorcycle, a revival of a pioneering motorcycle maker, has halted production and laid off its entire work force, citing financial troubles that could force the company into bankruptcy.

Indian chairman Frank J. O’Connell told 380 workers at the company’s Gilroy plant Monday that they would immediately stop manufacturing because a deal with a major investor fell through.

O’Connell said he had received calls from dozens of other potential investors, and he still hopes that the death-defying company would return to operation.

The company specializes in so-called cruisers – large, relatively smooth motorcycles with a relaxed seating position and cushy suspensions for leisurely riding. Cruisers are the fastest growing segment of the motorcycle market.

–By RACHEL KONRAD, The Associated Press

–from Bubblehead

INDIAN LARRY HITS THE BIG TIME–What will our hero, Indian Larry, get his tattooed fingers into next?Let’s see Jesse James or Billy Lane take a stab at big screen and book advertizing.–TBear

NEW YORK – The ad shows a tattooed biker, scowling and shaggy-haired, against a harsh backdrop of blue and black.

“Flying cars. Fire Whiskey. Death Eaters,” reads the caption above the picture.

At the bottom, next to the catch phrase “We all have our reasons. What’s yours?” comes the real pitch:

“There’s some pretty tough stuff in Harry Potter ? bad guys so bad they’re called Death Eaters. That’s one of the wicked reasons even bikers think Harry Potter is cool enough to ride with them.”

Having already conquered the children’s market, Scholastic, Inc., the U.S. publisher of J.K. Rowling’s multimillion-selling series, is targeting adults, ages 18 to 35. Potter ads featuring bikers, skateboarders and couch potatoes will appear in Rolling Stone and other magazines throughout October.

“We felt we needed to think out of the box and reach out to readers who would not normally pick up a copy of Harry Potter unless somebody placed it in their hands,” Barbara Marcus, president of Scholastic Children’s Books, told The Associated Press on Tuesday, a day before the publisher was to officially announce the new campaign.http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story2&u=/030923/168/5d4oi.html&e=18

–from TBear

Pat Bourgeois from Victory organized the party.

LAST CALL–So I snagged a late start. I was dragged from Oakland airport to the new Arlen Ness facility in Dublin, California, slightly inland. Let’s see if I remember this correctly. Oh, yeah, we staggered back to the hotel after the party at the Ness Facility. If you roll into the bay area don’t miss a tour of this facility. You could easily call it the Custom Motorcycle Museum. The facility encases many of Arlen’s bikes from the early ’70s up, his article framed on the walls. It’s incredible. Then the true meaning of the assignment came to light. The new model line-up for Victory, the King Pin, with design touched grazed by Arlen and Cory Ness. The line-up includes a limited edition Vegas series designed by Arlen. Only one for every dealership. Sharp bikes.

Limited edition Arlen Ness signature series bike from Victory.

The next day reveille was called at the crack of dawn. We were handcuffed and led into a Sheriffs paddy wagon for a hour-and-a-half jerking ride into Napa Valley. That’s where they unleash our mad-as-hell muthas to ride the new King Pins, the sport and touring models. We weaved through snake-like hillside roads that made hairpins reminiscent of interstates. We lost one rider and another went down on an anti-banked curve. I’m still recovering from motion sickness. There will be a full report here on Bikernet, another two pages in American Rider and if you’re interested check out the custom option features on the Victory Web site. This is an American motorcycle that deserves consideration. Try one and let me know what you think.

There’s more to report but whiskey and women are waiting. Watch for more Sturgis action, wild fiction, and the Victory Report in the near future. Oh shit, I forgot. We did a study of the Best Bike Web Sites for American Rider. We may give you a sneak preview next week. Of course Bikernet took the cake.

Ride forever,
–Bandit

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CRAZYHORSE RETURN FROM THE BADLANDS–The most evil home built hardtails are right here on Bikernet. Check out this month’s Readers’ Showcase. Arik Adam’s sweet coil cover is just a peek at the pure talent lurking out here that has decided to share the vision with us. As many folks are getting ready for their winter projects, we have a bit of inspriration for all of them. Between cleaning the ranch and cooking for company that seems to be arriving regularly every weekend, my niece’s soccer games ( her team is winning), getting this place ready for winter by patching the roof and slapping paint on the rotting wood, it seems odd that I should be doing some of the best artwork I have ever done. Maybe I’m getting good at this.

The flame paint belongs to EdSherrer up in Virginia. The parts belong to an evil hardtail he’s building. I had an odd request on this bike. He wanted a pile of turds with a Number 2 on the rear fender. My paint guys asked him why. He says “….cos it’s Pile of Shit #2.” I should be getting the parts for Pile of Shit #3 for painting next spring.

The VRod cover belongs to Jerry Wolfe of Texas. It’s dull cos there was no clearcoat on when I took this picture. Jerry shipped the entire bike to my husband Jim Bortles. He wanted Jim’s special brand of fab work done to it. The bike is complete now, but I haven’t gotten up to the shop to take pictures yet.I talked to Goth Girl a few weeks ago. She’s playing keyboard at Mike Corbin’s Biketobefest party. That’s reason enough to attend. Maybe she’ll stop by The Horse’s Saturday Bike Show at The Last Resort. Billy Lane is judging bikes. Last year’s winner was Hank Young’s Flying Pan. So if you’re thinking there’s no bikes worth making the journey to Fla to see, think again.

Good food, good times, no attitudes, and brutal choppers duking it out, Last Resort, Rt 1, Oct 18th, be there or be square.

–Crazy Horse

JANKLOW SPEAKS–“I believe in the system,” Janklow said during a press conference Monday.”And I think it needs to be fair for everybody and me. I’m entitled to the same presumptions and the same fairness as everybody else and I’ll get it.”

–from Rogue

BOXING AND MUAY THAI SEMINAR–with Richard S. Bustillo.Former Boxer * USA Boxing Coach & Official * certified Muay Thai Kruand a member of the Black Belt Hall of Fame and World Martial Arts Hall of Fame@ The IMB Academy on Saturday, October 18, 2003 from 1 PM to 4 PMTel (310) 787-8793 www.IMBACADEMY.com22109 South Vermont Avenue, Torrance, CA 90502

Hands-on training will emphasize strong basics and fundamentals for all levels above age eighteen. Male and female, beginner to advance, and non-martial artists are invited. We don’t want to teach you only techniques, we want you to be able to understand your strengths and weaknesses, your coordination, stamina and physical condition for a better well being and a healthy body.

WHAT YOU WILL LEARN AND PRACTICE: 1) Balance and foot work 2) Rope skipping and shadow boxing 3) Punching & kicking techniques and combinations 4) Defense positions5) Countering maneuvers 6) Reaction drills for immediate response 7) Strength training.

WHAT TO BRING: 1) A smile 2) Two t-shirts and a towel because you will sweat 3) Hand wraps if you have them 4) Bag gloves if you have them 5) Focus pads if you have them 6) Jumping rope if you have them 7) Money, If you don’t have the above items, you can purchase them at the IMB. However, it is not necessary to bring any of the above items. Just bring in your work out attitude.

NOTE: No free sparring. So! Don’t worry about getting knocked out or knocking out anyone.

Fee: $35/Pre-regisration or $45/Door Registration

No spectators and video cameras allowed

AH, BLONDE JOKES–There are three blondes washed up on an island. Suddenly a fairy appears and offers to grant each one of them one wish.

The first blonde asks to be intelligent. Instantly, she is turned into a brown haired woman and she swims off the island.

The next one asks to be even more intelligent than the previous one, so instantly she is turned into a ravishing redhead. The redhead builds a boat and sails off the island.

The third blonde asks to become even more intelligent than the previous two. The fairy turns her into a man, and he walks across the bridge.

–from Rogue

BLONDE JOKES FOREVER–The blondes at the university led by Suzy , were tired of not fitting in. They were tired of other students assuming they were just stupid bimbos. They wanted somewhere where they felt they belonged.

So Suzy pressured the administration to set up a new Department especially for them. The university agreed and set up the Blonde Education Department.

Suzy and the blondes were ecstatic to have a department of their own where they could gather without being ridiculed. They felt they really belonged now. They wanted other students to see that they weren’t just stupid bimbos — after all, they now had their own department at the university.

So they now all proudly wear the official sweatshirt of the Blonde Education Department designed by Suzy which sports the saying: “I Belong in B.E.D.”

–from ROGUE

Chris T. the owner of Expressive Designs, the crew who make Bikernet stickers. He learned everything about building bikes from OCC.

SNAP-ON TOOLS AND ORANGE COUNTY CHOPPERS TEAM-UP TO DESIGN AND BUILD INCREDIBLE CHOPPER–MILWAUKEE, Wis., Sept. 23, 2003 – Snap-on Tools and Orange County Choppers haveannounced the completion of a specially designed and built Snap-on Tools chopper thatincorporates Snap-on? tools such as sockets, wrenches and ratchets into the actual design of theremarkable bike. In a special event at Snap-on’s Milwaukee, Wis., manufacturing facility onAugust 29, Orange County Choppers presented the bike to Snap-on Tools.

As part of the presentation, Snap-on Tools announced the father-and-son team of PaulTeutul, Sr., and Paul Teutul, Jr., will begin the development of a series of licensed products forthe industry to include tool storage units, equipment, hand tools and power tools.

Chris Pfaus, vice president of marketing for Snap-on Tools, said the two entities are aperfect match. “Snap-on Tools is the premiere supplier of tools and equipment for theprofessional automotive technician and Orange County Choppers is nationally known for some ofthe best new chopper designs on the market. Both are undeniably best-in-class. With a garagefilled with Snap-on Tools, Paul, Sr., and Paul, Jr. will now be even better able to build thoseremarkable machines that their millions of fans have come to love.”

–from TBear

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BAD COP–NO DOUGHNUT– Florida – When she was 17, the woman said, she had sex with Joe Busby on the hood of his cruiser while he was supposed to be on duty, patrolling Century as a deputy for the Escambia County Sheriff’s Office.

Another woman said she had sex several times with Busby, including occasions when he was on duty.

Busby denied the claims, but he didn’t seem any more believable than Bill Clinton.

Still, after Sheriff Ron McNesby fired him, Busby protested, asking the Civil Service Board to let him keep his job.

That’s where the tale unfolded Thursday night, in a hearing room more accustomed to technical matters than accusations about a wolf in lawman’s clothing.

One of the first witnesses was a woman who said she had sex with Busby in 2001, when she was underage.

“I was a little intoxicated,” she said, recounting her voluntary tryst with him outside the cruiser one night.

“He picked me up, threw me on the hood,” she said, adding that he first took off his uniform and bulletproof vest and got a condom from a bag under the cruiser’s front seat.

–from Rogue

CHECK OUT THE LATEST FROM AEROMACH–
Firefighter Mirror on Swerve Arm
As seen on Orange County Choppers “Fire bike”, the firefighter (maltese cross) is machined from T6 aluminum and chrome plated. The Swerve arm measures 4 H X 6.5 L and is also aluminum, chrome plated.

Torched Skull Axle Covers
Chrome billet axle covers. Bite tight with two setscrews per part.For Harley-Davidson. Fits 1988-2003 XL, 1988-2000 FXR, 1991-2003 Dyna, 1985-2003 Softail (except 1984-1999 Springer & Deuce), 1984-1999 FLT (except Road King & Dresser), & 1980-1986 FXWG
AM-4520 Torched Skull Axle Covers $119.95 pair

For more information contact Aeromach Manufacturing @ 800 990-9392
11423-B Woodside Ave
Santee, CA. 92071

POLICE CORRUPTION RING– Franklin Police Chief Robert Tucker was suspended Sept. 2 for allegedly using a city credit card for personal expenses. He has since been reinstated but is still under investigation.

Former Atlanta police Maj. John Woodard pleaded not guilty Aug. 29 to charges he used his position to get police information and gave it to his wifes business. The wife, Debra Woodard, is accused of falsely claiming cash seized by officers.

East Point Officer Danny Powell turned himself in Aug. 28 after he was accused of stealing money during a car search.

Albany police Cpl. Max Parrish was placed on leave after he shot and wounded a man during an attempted robbery of a Subway Sandwiches & Salad shop Aug. 27.

A jail spokesman said Aug. 25 the FBI was investigating four Dougherty County Jail officers who are accused of beating a man unconscious with a pair of handcuffs and knocking a womans tooth out.

Former Treutlen County Sheriff Wayne Hooks was convicted Aug. 22 of using excessive force at a jail after arresting two men.

A former Liberty County deputy, whose name wasnt released, was found not guilty by a jury Aug. 22 on charges she investigated her own rape.

Chattooga County sheriffs deputies Lt. Dan Young and Sgt. Jamye Dawson resigned Aug. 15 after a videotape surfaced showing them having sex with an unidentified woman. The officers were in full uniform with their sheriffs department walkie-talkies turned on.

Atlanta police Officer David Alan Freeman was arrested Aug. 13 on charges he warned the Diablos of police investigations, confiscated drugs from arrested suspects in rival gangs and attempted to recruit gang members.

Two Fulton County Jail employees were arrested in early August after an undercover investigation found they were involved in drug deals with inmates.

East Ellijay Police Chief Larry Seabolt was arrested July 28 on charges he falsified an accident report and offered to drop a DUI citation in exchange for sexual favors.

–from Rogue

THREE WISHES–A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich behind him, and as he sits, the waitress comes over and asks for their order.

The man says, “I’ll have a hamburger, fries and a coke,” and turns to the ostrich. “What’s yours?”

“I’ll have the same,” says the ostrich.

A short time later, the waitress returns with the order. “That will be $6.40 please,” and the man reaches into his pocket and pulls out exact change for payment.

The next day, the man and the ostrich come again and the man says, “I’ll have a hamburger, fries and a coke,” The ostrich says, “I’ll have the same.” Once again, the man reaches into his pocket and pays with exact change.

This becomes a routine until late one evening, the two enter again. “The usual?” asks the waitress. “No, this is Friday night, so I will have a steak, baked potato and salad,” says the man. “Same for me,” says the ostrich.

A short time later the waitress comes with the order and says, “That will be $12.62.” Once again the man pulls exact change out of his pocket and places iton the table.

The waitress can’t hold back her curiosity any longer. “Excuse me, sir. How do you manage to always come up with the exact change out of your pocket every time?”

“Well,” says the man, “several years ago I was cleaning the attic and I found an old lamp. When I rubbed it a Genie appeared and offered me two wishes. My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything, just put my hand in my pocket, and the right amount of money would always be there.”

“That’s brilliant!” says the waitress. “Most people would wish for a million dollars or something, but you’ll always be as rich as you want for as long as you live!”

“That’s right! Whether it’s a gallon of milk or a Rolls Royce, the exact money is always there,” says the man.

The waitress asks, “One other thing, sir, what’s with the ostrich?”

The man sighs and answers, “My second wish was for a tall chick with long legs who agrees with everything I say.

–from Geno of the HORSE

OUTLAW JUSTICE IN THE GULCH–Not the book, but the painting from Eric Herrmann. Once again you can buy this limited edition, signed by Bandit, work of art, here at Bikernet.com. Just click on the link above and be the first on your block to own one!

BIKERNET CONTEST WINNERS–All right people! We’ve had an increase of submissions in the Free Contest, and your suggestions are great. Thanks for taking the time to write us. We DO read them all. Here’s two new winners, one from the Cantina and the other from the free area. Keep them coming because I’m about to go scrounging to all our sponsors for a fresh batch of really cool gifts!

Cantina winner
Brian Teel from Brookline Station, Mo
Wanted: I could REALLY use a long sleeve T-shirt

I need you to email me, Brian. I need to know your T-Shirt size…

Free Area Contest

CURT HOOVERSON FROM PRAIRIE DU SAC, WIS
Suggestion: INTERVIEW WISCONSIN SENATOR DAVE ZEIN (REP OF EAU CLAIRE) WHO IS BIG MEMBER OF ABATE AND HELPED REPEAL THE HELMET LAW IN WIS. IN THE 80S.
Wanted: BIKERNET T-SHIRT OR BASEBALL CAP, OR SOME OF BANDITS BOOKS.

Thanks for the suggestion, Curt. Just today someone else suggested the same thing to Bandit. We’re gonna do it.

Hold on, I’m not through here. Last week I asked you readers to enter a contest to win a free helmet from Scull Screamers. All you have to do is send me a jpeg. image of a self-decorated helmet. We had one entry so far from Scoot, and his is very cool. I’m gonna wait a couple more weeks, if no one enters, the winner will be Scoot’s with the one and only cool helmet around. Take a look at some of the helmets that you could win at www.skullscreamers.com. ~Sin

MAN ENTERS CONTEST FOR CUSTOM HELMET–Here is my finished M35 German Helmet completely restored and converted to a Motorcycle Helmet. Does it meet your helmet contest rules?The digital grunge ran a story on it in the Cantina. And he never got to post the finished pic in that article, one of the gals posted it in the Thursday news instead (while you were on that tramp steamer). So I don’t think it made sense to anyone. Anyhow here is the pick (with me hiding under the heavy thing). So, if it meets the contest rules please add me.

–Scoot
freakinbiker@hotmail.com

Continued On Page 3

Found myself in the new Arlen Ness Store.

The news is late and I’m innocent. Monday, the week appeared mellow in my crystal 5-Ball. Then the phone ran, “Ball get on a plane to Oakland. There will be a car waiting. Take riding gloves.” The phone went dead, but I suspected that the weasel-like voice on the other end was Buzz Buzzelli, the editor of American Rider. My pockets were empty of cash or a ticket when I arrived at LAX but Southwest will allow anyone on a flight.

There was a group of thugs wearing black shirts.

As I stepped off the curb in front of Terminal Two in Oakland and into a stretched limo my life changed. For two days I was swept into the Napa Valley Hills. I just returned and I’m trying to unwind my crumpled brain cells. I’ll tell you all about it later? Let’s hit the news before the staff smacks me:

HORSE BACKSTREET CHOPPER INVITES YOU– Join us at The Horse BackStreet Choppers Magazine?s Third Annual Biketoberfest Meet And Greet Party! In Daytona Beach at The Last Resort Bar. Party with the staff and selected VIP guests from 7 to 9 PMSaturday nite 10/18/03 (Open Bar and Free Eats). The Last Resort (386-761 5147) is located at 5812 S. Ridgewood(on US 1 just south of Daytona), Port Orange, Florida. Bring this VIP invite to The Horse tent for your wristband.For info/RSVP call Geno at 561 394 5353 geno@ironcross.net or English Jim at 386 846 8742.

We are also having a Ol? Skool Hardcore Chopper Show at The Last Resort onSaturday, Oct. 18, judging at 6 pm (sign up by 4pm). Billy Lane will judgethe chopper show and we will present trophies for 1st, 2nd and 3rd place.The winning choppers will be featured in The Horse mag. in 2004.See ya there!

The World’s Largest Selling Chopper Mag. www.thehorsemag.com

HAVEN’T THEY HUNG JANKLOW YET?–I do not think that the accident is being handled how it should be. Janklow should have been charged with something like speeding, just like any other ordinary citizen.

I have no confidence that the complete story will be told. He’s been speeding for a long time. Why does he still have a license, and why was he driving a car registered to someone else?

Janklow should respond by telling the truth. In reading the articles, it sounds like Janklow is full of excuses and likes to blame everyone but himself. Maybe he should have been jailed for a while, and maybe he would have changed his driving habits. I think he should not be allowed to drive again.

He is a hazard to the rest of us on the road. I think it’s time he took responsibility for his actions. A slap on the wrist isn’t going to deter him from doing it again.

Diane Immediato
Jasper, Minn.

I used to live in South Dakota and once worked for the state. Janklow was hailed by many for his “no-nonsense” talk and approach. However, I always saw his “honesty” as arrogance and his “no-nonsense” talk as boasting. He would brag about his speeding.

Janklow promoted this lawless side of himself because it seemed a harmless way to promote his power, which is unrivaled in South Dakota.

Now, there are consequences to this dangerous behavior. How many times has Janklow driven that road between Flandreau and Brandon? A hundred? A thousand? He had to know there was a stop sign at that intersection. The excuse that there was a vehicle in his lane of traffic is hollow. If he had not been speeding, an accident would not have occurred.

No one is to blame but Janklow. My hope is that his huge ego will allow him to come clean and admit his full responsibility in this tragedy.

Steven S. Collins
Redwood Falls, Minn.

I am sad that Bill Janklow is not receiving the same treatment any ordinary citizen would in our community. If any of us had committed the crime he has, and with his driving record, we wouldn’t be walking the streets without having posted a significant bail. But, because Mr. Janklow is part of the “good ol’ boy” network in this town, he is likely to get off without any serious ramifications. Because of his years as governor and his ties to the state patrol and other law enforcement agencies, he won’t be treated the same way others would be.

I wish it were different, and I hope the Moody County prosecutors prove me wrong. But I doubt it.

Tim Borger
Sioux Falls

–from Rogue

HEROES OF H-D BY ED YOUNGBLOOD–Could be a good one from Motorbooks Int. It’s the official book and guide to the Motorcycle Hall of Fame Museum exhibit of the same name and meet the men and women who made it happen. Might have some insight and fresh perspective. It’s 34.95 in all book stores or through Classic Motorbooks at (800) 826-6600 or www.motorbooks.com.

BLONDE JOKES FOREVER–The blondes at the university led by Suzy , were tired of not fitting in. They were tired of other students assuming they were just stupid bimbos. They wanted somewhere where they felt they belonged.

So Suzy pressured the administration to set up a new Department especially for them. The university agreed and set up the Blonde Education Department.

Suzy and the blondes were ecstatic to have a department of their own where they could gather without being ridiculed. They felt they really belonged now. They wanted other students to see that they weren’t just stupid bimbos — after all, they now had their own department at the university.

So they now all proudly wear the official sweatshirt of the Blonde Education Department designed by Suzy which sports the saying: “I Belong in B.E.D.”

–from Rogue

BAD RIDE COMBINED MEETING–BIKERNET MAY SPONSOR–Hello everyone! I wanted to confirm the “FirstCombined Meeting” for Rip’s B.A.D. Ride VII will be atCalifornia Harley-Davidson next Tuesday, September23rd!

California Harley-Davidson1517 Pacific Coast Highway, Harbor City

Angie Stock
Area Manager II
American Diabetes Association
714-662-7940 ext. 7439
800-828-8293 ext. 7439
Fax 714-662-0247

Some of our favorite Bikernet Assets.

NEW BIKE MAG–Hey guys I’m coming out with a new mag called assets. It deals withcustom bikes, check out assetsmagazine.com and get in touch. We’re just getting started, so we need help. We’re launching in June of 2004.

Trevor layne
ceo/founder
assets magazine
702.241.8888

AFL-CIO URGES PRISON PROBE–RIVERTON, Wyo. – The state AFL-CIO has asked Gov. Dave Freudenthal to investigate the use of prison labor to build and staff a $5 million mushroom farm in Shoshoni.

AFL-CIO executive secretary John Faunce said the labor group is concerned that the Wyoming Honor Farm prisoners are taking jobs from the private sector. He also alleged the opening of Wind River Mushrooms was causing the closure of a similar facility in California.

Faunce said he is not opposed to providing labor training for prisoners but is concerned the program gives “the mushroom grower free prison labor during the construction phase.”

Wyoming Department of Corrections spokeswoman Melinda Brazzale denied the allegations, saying the farm is unrelated to the closure of the California facility, which is owned by a partner in the Shoshoni venture, Doug Tanner of Watsonville, Calif.

Tanner recently announced he was closing Sunrise Mushrooms in California, but Brazzale said none of its equipment or labor will be moved to Wyoming.

Up to 30 inmates are expected to be employed at the facility in its first year, increasing to about 60 inmates in Year 2 and up to 90-100 inmates when the plant achieves full capacity in three years.

–from Rogue

COPS GONE BAD–Louisiana – Federal agents have arrested a Harahan police officer, alleging that he illegally obtained nearly 2,200 pain pills over a 15-month period from four pharmacists, using prescriptions from seven doctors, authorities said.

Wiley M. Wood IV was booked last week with prescription fraud.

Acting U.S. Attorney Jim Letten said Wood has not been charged with distributing the 2,196 hydrocodone pills, but the investigation is continuing.

“We wanted to act quickly on this because of the public-safety aspect having a police officer obtaining this quantity of drugs,” Letten said.

Wood, a six-year veteran of the department, was arrested Sept. 12 after being called in to a meeting at police headquarters and was released on his own recognizance, which is normal for this kind of case, Letten said.

Wood’s attorney, Vinny Mosca, said Wood used the pills for a back injury he sustained last year.

BLONDE JOKES AT LAST–After traveling a few blocks, a blonde realizes she had no money and immediately informed the driver. “You’d better stop. I can’t pay you and it’s ten dollars already,” she said.

The driver checked her out in the rear-vision mirror.

“That’s okay,” he said. “I’ll turn down the first dark street, get in the back seat and take off your bra.”

“You’d be cheating yourself,” she replied. “This bra is only worth five dollars.”

–from Rogue

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BIKERNET LAUNCHES 2004 NEW MODELS–The rubbermounted Sportsters are next on the list. The hot new item for 2004– Rubbermounted Sportsters, will completely turn the line upside down. Hang on.

New map of Iraq.

FELONS MUST SERVE MORE OF THEIR SENTENCES–TALLAHASSEE — It’s not just criminals who pay when politicians get tough on crime. Taxpayers do, too.A Florida Today analysis shows that while some advocates and lawmakers blame a glut of drug offenders for Florida’s prison population boom, the explosion actually was touched off by anti-crime legislation.

Since 1995 when Florida began requiring all prison inmates serve at least 85 percent of their sentences, the time most inmates spend behind bars has tripled, even as the punishments judges hand out decreased.

Sentences for most crimes are actually down, the analysis found. The average drug offender in 1994 was sentenced to 3.6 years; last year, it was 3 years. But inmates today serve more of their sentences.

Legislative analyst Richard Stevens said most judges take today’s tougher prison release policies into account when they sentence criminals. “They started giving shorter sentences,” he said.

Looked at another way, taxpayers spent $29,468 per inmate sent to prison in 1988, based on today’s cost of $48.15 per inmate per day.

The bill for inmates released in July was $52,290 on average, and $74,247 for violent offenders.

It’s a bargain, said Sen. Victor Crist, a Tampa Republican who spearheaded the legislation when he was in the House.

“It costs a lot more money for them to commit crimes on the street,” Crist said.

Longer sentences mean more crowded prisons, and a bigger market for the private prison industry, said Alan Duffee, executive director of the Correctional Privatization Commission that oversees Florida’s five private prisons.

“We are . . . deeply troubled that the private prison industry has actively supported institutions that lobby for harsher sentencing laws, which increase the prison population,” reads an April statement by Catholic Bishops of the South. The organization represents bishops from 12 southern states, including Florida. The statement was signed by all bishops in Florida.

By Paige St. JohnAlisa LaPolt contributed to this report. FLORIDA TODAY

–from Rogue

AGAIN BIKERNET RELATIONSHIP ADVICE–Billy Bob and Luther were talking one afternoon when Billy Bob tellsLuther, “Ya know, I reckon I’m ’bout ready for a vacation. Only thisyear I’m gonna do it a little different. The last few years, I tookyour advice about where to go. Three years ago you said to go to Hawaii.

I went to Hawaii and Earline got pregnant.

Then two years ago, you told me to go to the Bahamas, and Earline gotpregnant again.

Last year you suggested Tahiti and darned if Earlinedidn’t get pregnantagain.”

Luther asks Billy Bob, “So, what you gonna do this year that’sdifferent?”

Billy Bob says, “This year I’m taking Earline with me.

–from Rev CarlR

THREE LESSON IN HOW TO LOSE YOUR JOB

–from Chris T.

THE CONDOM–The government announced today that it is changing its emblem to acondom because it more clearly reflects the government’s politicalstance. A condom stands up to inflation, halts production, destroys thenext generation, protects a bunch of pricks, and gives you a sense ofsecurity while you’re actually being screwed.

Damn, it just doesn’t get more accurate than that

–from Joan C.

Senator Ben “NightHorse” Campbell, needs your help.

AIM LEGISLATIVE NEWS–Every other week we publish mostly legislative news sponsored by A.I.M. Watch for the updates in the Biker’s Rights Section of Bikernet. Here’s a taste of the latest report from Bill Bish. Take a minute to touch on the AIM banner and sign up, it’s free, for their free legal protection.

MOTORCYCLE SAFETY EFFORT NEEDS YOUR HELP United States Senator Ben Nighthorse Campbell (R-CO) has introduced a resolution in Congress to designate May 2004 as National Motorcycle Safety and Awareness Month, but your help is needed to get the measure adopted. Please contact your U.S. Senators and request that they support Senate Resolution 168, and make our federal legislators aware of motorcyclists’ overwhelming support for this effort.

Although virtually every state and major municipality has issued “Motorcycle Awareness” proclamations over the past several years, no such Congressional resolution has ever been passed to bring national awareness to motorcycle safety.

Campbell has been riding for more than 50 years and has been a champion for motorcyclists’ issues on the federal level, including serving on the NCOM Legislative Task Force.

BACK TO BIKERNET RELATIONSHIP ADVICE– Question: How many women with MENOPAUSE does it take to change a light bulb?

Answer: One! ONLY ONE!!!! And do you know WHY? Because no one else in this house knows HOW to change a light bulb! They don’t even know that the bulb is BURNED OUT!! They would sit in the dark for THREE DAYS before they figured it out. And, once they figured it out, they wouldn’t be able to find the light bulbs despite the fact that they’ve been in the SAME CUPBOARD for the past 17 YEARS! But if they did, by some miracle, actually find them 2 DAYS LATER, the chair they dragged to stand onto change the STUPID light bulb would STILL BE IN THE SAME SPOT!!!!! AND UNDERNEATH IT WOULD BE THE WRAPPER THE STUPID LIGHT BULBS CAME IN!!! BECAUSE NO ONE EVER CARRIES OUT THE GARBAGE!!!! IT’S A WONDER WE HAVEN’T ALL SUFFOCATED FROM THE PILES OF GARBAGE THAT ARE A FOOT DEEP THROUGHOUT THE ENTIRE HOUSE!! IT WOULD TAKE AN ARMY TO CLEAN THIS HOUSE!

I’m sorry…. What was the question?

–from Jay H.

THE TRIKE BARBECUE OR THE BARBECUED TRIKE–Here’s something we did a few years ago. You might find it interesting. Ihave many more pictures, if you want.

–LDT

SONS OF LIBERTY RIDERS E-NEWS– MRF Distributes EPA Story Via National Wire Service:The Motorcycle Riders Foundation (MRF) distributed news about theEnvironmental Protection Agency’s (EPA) answer to Congressmen Shimkus(R-Illinois) and Strickland (D-Ohio) via USNewswire this morning. Thisnational wire service distribution was made possible thanks to the generousdonations last year of the MRF’s partners in the EPA fight. The MRF wouldonce again like to thank those organizations and individuals whose donationsmade possible the “Vaughn Study” and news alerts such as the one sent thismorning.

The MRF has argued for more than three years that the EPA’s proposedemissions regulations for street motorcycles will have an extremely negativeimpact on small businesses such as aftermarket parts manufacturers andsmall-volume motorcycle makers. Subsequently, American Motorcycle DealerMagazine (AMD) warned those small businesses in its July ’03 issue ofPRO-GUIDE #3 – AFTERMARKET EXHAUSTS about the serious implications of thisproposed rule.

In an article written by AMD Editor Richard Burton that appeared on pages 4& 5 of the AMD PRO-GUIDE #3, Mr. Burton warns, “Unfortunately, the EPA’sproposals pose a threat to the much-relied on aftermarket, as well as thevast cottage industry of other small businesses involved with the v-twinsector, including small-volume bike manufacturers.” To view Mr. Burton’sarticle in its entirety, visit the MRF website at www.mrf.org/epa.php.

Naturally, the EPA’s proposed street bike emissions regulations will be ahot topic at this year’s MRF Meeting of the Minds, which will begin laterthis week in Green Bay, Wisconsin. It is not too late to register to attendthis annual conference. In fact, you can register by either calling the MRFoffice today at 202-546-0983 or on-site beginning Thursday, September 18,2003. If you are unable to attend, you can still listen in on generaldiscussions about the EPA, health care discrimination, and thereauthorization of the Transportation Equity Act of the 21st Century viaINBRadio through live broadcasts by visiting www.inbradio.com.

Michigan may the next helmet choice state

Michigan Senate Bill 321, introduced by Senators Cropsey, Barcia, Leland,Patterson, Prusi, Stamas, Jelinek, McManus and Schauer and referred to theCommittee on Transportation, provides exceptions to requirement of wearingmotorcycle crash helmet if successfully completed motorcycle safety course.

SB 321 aims at putting Michigan among the 31 other states thathave restored the long-standing fundamental belief of both AMA and ABATE ofMichigan that adults should continue to have the right to voluntarily decidewhen to wear a helmet.

You can find all of your Senators contact information athttp://senate.michigan.gov/SenatorInfo/find-your-senator.htm, or by mail at:Michigan Senate, State Capitol, PO Box 30036, Lansing, MI, 48909-7536.

Pennyslvania working to increase penalties for right-of-way violations

Pennsylvania’s House Bill 181, introduced by Representative Teresa Forcier(R-Titusville) to increase penalties for right-of-way violations that causeinjury or death to other roadway users has stalled in committee.

This billis consistent with model legislation included in the AMA’s MotorcyclistsMatter campaign,Your letter in support of HB-181 should be addressed to The HonorableRichard A. Geist, Chairman, House Transportation Committee, Main CapitolBuilding, Room 144, Harrisburg, PA 17120-2020.

You may also contactRepresentative Geist in his Harrisburg office via telephone at 717-787-6419or fax at 717-772-5142, or his district office in Altoona via telephone at814-946-7218 or fax at 814-949-7915.An additional letter in support of HB-181 should be addressed to yourrepresentative at the Pennsylvania House of Representatives, CapitolBuilding, House Box 202020, Harrisburg, PA 17120-2020.Your support for HB-181 is needed NOW to make sure Pennsylvania motoristsand courts know that ‘Motorcyclists Matter.’

TEXANS IN HEAVEN–Gabriel came to the Lord and said ” I have to talkto you. We have some Texans up here in Heaven who arecausing problems. They’re swinging on the pearly gates, my horn is missing,barbeque sauce is all over their robes,their dogs are riding in the chariots, and they’rewearing baseball caps and cowboy hats instead of theirhalos. They refuse to keep the stairway to Heaven clean. There arewatermelon seeds and pig feet bones all over the place. Some of them arewalking around with just one wing.”

The Lord said, “I made them special, Gabriel. Heavenis Home to all my children. If you really want to knowabout real problems, let’s call the Devil.”

The Devil answered the phone, ” Hello? Damn, hold onminute.”The Devil returned to the phone, “O.K., I’m back. Whatcan I do for you?”

The Lord replied, “I just want to know what kind ofproblems you’re having down there.”

The Devil said, “Hold on again. I need to check onsomething.”After about 5 minutes the Devil returned to the phoneand said, “I’m back. Now what was the question?”

The Lord said, “What kind of problems are you havingdown there?”

The Devil said, “Man, I don’t believe this….Hold on,Lord.”

This time the Devil was gone 15 minutes. The Devilreturned and said , “I’m sorry Lord, I can’t talkright now. Them damn Texans done put out the fireand are trying to install air conditioning.”

–from Rev CarlR

ADVANCE CUSTOM PAINTING BOOK–New from legendary painter Jon Kosmoski comes the book: Advanced Custom Painting Techniques. Over 350 photos by well-known photographer Tim Remus bring to life Jon?s explanations of panel preparation, gun control, kandy application, use of color-change materials, new metallic basecoats, and how to design and tapeout complex layouts.Whether your painting projects ride on two wheels or four, this how-to book from Jon Kosmoski is sure to answer your questions. Four start-to-finish sequences take you into Jon?s shop and illustrate each step in the process.Printed in color, this 144 page book is available for $24.95 + $5.50 S+H (in the US) from Wolfgang Publications. Order by mail at: 1310 Sunny Slope Ln, Stillwater, MN 55082; By phone at: 651 275 9411, or on the web at: wolfgangpublications.com.

FINAL BIKERNET RELATIONSHIP ADVICE–
Q: What should you do if you see yourex-husband rolling around in pain on the ground?
A: Shoot him again.
Q: How can you tell when a man is well-hung?
A: When you can just barely slip your finger in betweenhis neck and the noose.
Q: Why do little boys whine?
A: Because they’re practicing to be men.
Q: How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: One – he just holds it up there and waits for the worldto revolve around him.
OR Three — one to screw in the bulb, and two to listento him brag about the screwing part.
Q: What do you call a handcuffed man?
A: Trustworthy.
Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gaspingfor breath and calling your name?
A: You didn’t hold the pillow down long enough.
Q: Why does it take 100,000,000 sperm to fertilize one egg?
A: Because not one will stop and ask directions.
Q: Why do female black widow spiders kill their males after mating?
A: To stop the snoring before it starts.
Q: Why do men whistle when they’re sitting on the toilet?
A: Because it helps them remember which end they need to wipe.
Q: What is the difference between men and women.
A: A woman wants one man to satisfy her every need.
A man wants every woman to satisfy his one need.
Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
A: Rename the mail folder to”Instruction Manuals”

–from Redhorse

That’s about enough of that bullshit. I say we need a batch of blonde jokes.–Bandit

WE’RE BURNIN’ DAYLIGHT–Let’s post this rag-tag bunch of scrap and get to the garage. In short order we’ll post another King Tech, a feature on this ’39 WLDR restored by Randy Simpson at Milwaukee Iron, the Beach Ride bike build is coming up along with more Sturgis and Milwaukee reports from Frank Kaisler.

Let’s hope the storm peters out on the east coast, so our brothers and sisters can ride a while before winter sets in. I’ve got to jump into the garage and hammer sheet metal, the deadline approaches.

Ride Forever,
–Bandit

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BIKERNET CARIBBEAN REPORT– I was debating if I was going to do the news tonight, or not, but I got my lazy ass up and started writing. Lazy I say, sure, when you are juggling one thousand things at a time, hurricanes and whatever, there’s a kind of numbness that’s feels like laziness. Time just passes by and it’s the same shit, I have not been writing anything out of the ordinary or exciting (to me) because, simply nothing is going on. Or should I say way too many things at the same time.

As you all might know, it’s Hurricane high season, or peak like they love to call it at the Weather Channel, so it’s the yearly tradition, move everything from the lower (bigger shop) to the smaller (packed to the gills) just in case one of those suckers comes by and we can store everything in the bigger space. Yeap we are talking about cars, bikes, etc…. Anything that needs to be kept away from the damaging winds and flying branches. Lucky that Isabel went by our little island with no effect, well, only some heavy surf. You may ask yourself what does a guy on the borderline to insanity do in those occasions? Fuck, go surfing, what else!

Screw the shop, the builds, the calls, everything. Just hop in the SUV, grab the boards and go wave hunting. I guess it’s Hawaii’s fault, my shop was first, second and third in line, now we are taking breaks to just say fuck this and go hit the waves. You may ask why, and I can’t answer that, just that before (when I was younger) nothing was more important than go catch some good waves. There was always more schools days, more girls and other jobs, back then it was everything. Like everyone else that needs to “grow up” we find a lot more commitments, things to do and deadlines to meet. Going back in the water is just a way to do something that it’s not related to bikes or business, I dare call it an escape.

I don’t know how close of a relation choppers and surfing have, all I know is that many of my friends who build bikes surf as well, but you will see where I’m heading. Like I’ve said thousands of times before we are lucky to live on an island in the Caribbean, the sea is eternally here. It?s one of our resources and our playground, it’s there to enjoy and respect. I grab a board and take a time out, everything else has to wait. There?s always tomorrow and we can’t be expected to meet all the deadlines, all the time.

This Sunday while we were tackling 6 foot waves (12 foot faces for those who measure that way) on the other side of the island one of our friends suffered a stroke and passed away while riding his bike. He was an old friend who was a dealer for Pro One motorcycles here and had a car dealership for a really long time. We even had the pleasure to have him at our annual trip to Sturgis a few years back. I guess riding to him was like surfing to me, a way to escape the everyday hustle of shit to do and phone calls to answer, and he passed away doing what he liked, taking a break. I guess that as we ” mature” the things that matter the most are not really the ones that we think do. Sure I would love a Discovery channel show, but I also love being able to share some waves and time with old friends in the water. To joke around and hoot at buddies when they catch a kick ass wave. I guess what I’m trying to say is that we need a balance in our lives, we need to be productive but we need to enjoy things as well, since we never know when our turn will be.

Most of us don’t realize how lucky we are to be able to do things that we enjoy. I truly think that motorcycling in general is one of the freest things we can experience (until you have a shop) and something we really enjoy. Sure surfing is way up there, but it depends on the waves and the weather. To go riding all you depend is on the desire and the pavement, which is always there.

Ok, that’s it, I am ending my sermon for this week, not without respectfully saying goodbye to Junior Perez, and wishing everyone in North Carolina and Virginia the best of luck with Isabel heading your way.Be safe and live….

Jose

HANG JANKLOW HIGH–Pec, a Bikernet investigative reporter dug into Janklow’s record and discovered a distressing list of fines:

Janklow speeding violations since 1990
Jan. 4, 1990
Jackson County
Guilty plea to charge of driving 78 mph in a 65 mph zone.
Fine: $70

Jan. 13, 1990
Moody County
Guilty plea to charge of driving 74 mph in a 55 mph zone.Fine: $70

April 30, 1990
Hughes County
Guilty plea to charge of driving 45 mph in a 35 mph zone.
Fine: $25

Nov. 6, 1990
Jones County
Guilty plea to charge of driving 79 mph in a 65 mph zone.
Fine: $72.50

Incident date unknown. Case was disposed of July 15, 1991
Hanson County
Charge was driving 75 mph in a 65 mph zone.
Fine: $10

Oct 11, 1991
Aurora County
Guilty plea to driving 69 mph in a 55 mph zone.
Fine: $85

Nov. 5, 1991
Davison County
Guilty plea to a charge of driving 47 mph in a 30 mph zone.
Fine: $75

Dec. 16, 1991
McCook County
Guilty plea to a charge of driving 85 mph in a 65 mph zone.
Fine: $85

July 15, 1992
Minnehaha County
Pleaded no contest to a charge of following too close.
Fine: $28.50

March 15, 1993
Minnehaha County
Guilty plea to charge of driving 80 mph in a 65 mph zone.
Fine: $88.50

April 30, 1994
Jerauld County
Guilty plea to charge of driving 75 mph in a 55 mph zone
Fine: $78.50

May 30, 1994
Brookings County
Guilty plea to charge of driving 90 mph in a 65 mph zone.
Fine: $88.50

Oct. 30, 1994
Moody County
Guilty plea to charge of driving 80 mph in a 65 mph zone.
Fine: $63.50

CITY OF LONG BEACH ATTEMPTS TO CANCEL CHARITY BEACH RIDE– Carmela, Executive Director of the Exceptional Children’s Foundation in Culver City, California, received a letter from the City of Long Beach indicating that based on intelligence received by the Long Beach Police Department and information gathered from various law enforcement agencies in Ventura County, the City of Long Beach was going to revoke the permit already issued in January to ECF for Beach Ride. That was one week before the charity event was scheduled.

The ECF attorney forwarded a letter stating that permission was granted to ECF on 1/8/03. ECF had already spent over $50,000 and contracts with bands and vendors were already executed which meant that it was literally too late to cancel the event. The letter also stated that the references to “intelligence” and “information” were vague. The assistant tried to set a Wednesday evening meeting with ECF and Ashman. He walked everyone to the City Attorney’s office where the 10 am meeting was to convene. Also in the conference room were other City personnel. After discussions on attendance and security issues, the ECF group was asked to wait in the cafeteria.

In a letter/contract to ECF from the City Attorney dated Sept. 4: “Despite concerns raised primarily by the Police Department concerning public safety, this is to confirm the City’s agreement that your event may go forward in consideration of your agreement as follows: The letter listed 9 items ECF had to comply with including sending the City of Long Beach a check for $18,985 representing expected costs to the City for an event such as Beach Ride, and a total attendance cap of 4,500 people.

The Beach Ride Is 11 years old, without so much as a fist fight, yet the new police Chief felt it was wise to hold the Exceptional Children’s Foundation ransom for 18 grand. The event went forward the following weekend.

TEXAS COMING RIDER EVENTS-MARK YOUR CALENDAR–Howdy Harley Enthusiasts – Just Thought We’d Drop You a Line and Tell Ya What’s Coming Up From The “Times” this Fall & Winter. Mark Your Calenders !!

September 20 – Thunder Valley Raceway Park – Oklahoma State Championships – Noble Oklahoma

October 12 – Swap Meet Dallas – Longhorn Ballroom – Dallas Texas

October 19 – Texas Style Party Drags STATE FINALS – Lone Star Raceway Park – Sealy Texas

November 9 – Swap Meet Dallas – Longhorn Ballroom – Dallas Texas

November 23 – Swap Meet Austin – Crockett Center – Austin Texas

January 4 – Swap Meet Dallas – Longhorn Ballroom – Dallas Texas

Late January or Early February – Swap Meet Abilene – Location TBA

February 29 – Longview Swap Meet – Convention Complex – Longview Texas

March 7 – Swap Meet Dallas – Longhorn Ballroom – Dallas Texas

MORE SHOWS MAY BE ANNOUNCED – FOR MORE INFORMATION CHECK OUT: www.texasscooter.com

BEACH RIDE POSTERS AVAILABLE–For a limited time, if you join the Cantina or buy a copy of Orwell, we’ll send you a bitchin’ Beach Ride Poster featuring a CCI kit bike built by the Bikernet Crew and the lovely Marnie. Just order a Book or Join the Cantina and you’re golden.

Just click on the center Book Shop in the Bikernet Gulch below or the Cantina Banner at the bottom of the page.

MO’ BIKERNET RELATIONSHIP ADVICE–A Husband and wife are getting ready for bed. The wife is standingin front of a full length mirror taking a hard look at herself.

“You know love” she says, “I look in the mirror and I see an oldwoman. My face is all wrinkled, my boobs are barely above mywaist, my bum is hanging out a mile, I’ve got fat legs and my armsare all flabby.”

She turns to her husband and says…”Tell me something positive to make me feel better about myself”

He thinks about it for a bit and then says”Well……there’s nothing wrong with your eyesight”.

–from David M.

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FREE SHIT, SHIT IS FREE–No, we’re not giving away manure. T-Shirts, books, Motor Oil and canned Tuna maybe. I keep saying you can’t win if you don’t enter the free Bikernet contests, and we have two you know. The link above takes you to the contest in the free section. We also have a link in the Cantina, which means you have to be a member. Think about it though, when you become a Cantina member, you receive an Orwell free, and now we’re also giving away a Beach Ride poster with the hottest bike model, Marnie. What a deal!

A couple weeks ago we tried to give away a helmet and not one submission came in. We asked that you send a pic of yourself, wearing a helmet you decorated yourself, and yours truly, (that would be me) would pick the winner. I’ll run the article again, but first take a look at the most recent Bikernet contest winners.

ABDIAS GOMEZ
ELSA, TEXAS
Suggestion: A SECTION ON UPGRADES FOR SPORTSTERS. ENGINE UPGRADES AND SHEETMETAL UPGRADES. MANY OF US GUYS RIDE SPORTSTERS AND LIKE TO THINK THAT WE ARE PART OF THE BIKER COMMUNITY TOO.
Wanted: TOOL BAG, T-SHIRT, JACKET, A QUART OF HARLEY OIL…

Abdias get’s a T-Shirt, and a quart of Harley Oil. I’ve been threatening to take the Highway Patrol Motorcycle riding course, (poor Bandit), but if I do, he promised to get me one of the new Sportster, a custom of course. You may be reading about my experience soon, along with more on Sportsters! Yippee!!

MATT J. STULTZ
HOLLIDAYSBURG, PA
Suggestion: UPDATE THE STATE LAW CHARTS. IN PA THERE IS NO HELMET LAW NOW! WOOOO! (SOME RESTRICTIONS, 21, RIDING 2 YEARS ETC.) BUT THE BAN IS LIFTED THANKS TO CARD CARRYING MEMBERS OF ABATE. LIKE MYSELF. NOW, SEND ME SOME FREE SHIT!!!
Wanted: T-SHIRTS, BOOKS, ANY PARTS THAT NOBODY WANTS, HOOKERS, WHATEVER YOU GOT, I’LL TAKE… PEACE BROS.

Sorry Matt, we keep the hookers, you get Orwell.

DANNY WILSON.
COLUMBIA, MO
Suggestion: I WISH I COULD FIND MORE HARLEY ITEMS THAT WOULD FIT METRIC BIKES, KINDA LIKE A INTERCHANGE MANUAL FOR CARS.
Wanted: TO SOME DAY OWN A HARLEY.BUT WHAT WOULD REALLY BE GREAT IS IF ME AND MY WIFE COULD BOTH OWN HARLEYS SO SHE WOULD NOT TRY TO STEAL MINE.

What a sweetheart! Danny get’s a signed copy of Orwell for being thoughtful.

KEVIN LUMLEY
SYLVANIA, AUSTRALIA
Suggestion: G’DAY BANDIT, I CAME UP WITH THE IDEA THAT MAYBE YOU COULD START AN ONLINE ADULT MATCHMAKING SERVICE FOR BIKERS ONLY. IT’S SOMETHING I NOTICED WAS MISSING FROM MOST ONLINE MOTORCYCLE SITES. AND: YOU CAN CHARGE A FEE FOR THE SERVICE.
Wanted: WELL I DO NEED A LARGER CAPACITY PETROL TANK FOR THE 1400 INTRUDER. CHECK: WWW.INTRUDERALERT.COM FOR DETAILS. I ALSO WANT 7″ INCH RISERS FROM AEROMACH (TRIBAL STYLE) FAILING THAT I GUESS A FUCKIN’ T SHIRT WILL DO!

A fuckin? T-Shirt it is! I’ll see what I can do about the risers from aeromach. Send me an email with the details sinwu@bikernet.com

Mike Skaggs
CLARKSVILLE, AR
Wanted: A X-X Large Long sleeve Horse Shirt Black or Grey w/ Billy lane autograph. Thanx, Mike

I’m working on getting a Choppers Inc. shirt for you, Mike. If I can just get Billy to turn his eyes and attention from all the T&A he’s been autographing, I might get an email back him.

There you have it, your winners for a week or two. You really do win here at Bikernet. I try like hell to get the things you ask for, if I like your suggestions tht is. Till next time, take care. ~Layla

WIN A FREE HELMET–IT’S FREE!–Send a photo wearing your wildest homemade helmet, we?ll pick the winner. What do you have to lose? Not a damn thing. Send jpeg. Image to sinwu@bikernet.com. You can see the full line by checking out their web site http://www.skullscreamers.com/Or phone Eye Imagine Studio at 212-665-5711. Come on people, it’s a free fucking helmet. At least the people in California can enter. The helmet shown above is only one of several that you can choose from, if you win.

BRENDA FOX AT the DENVERS CHOPPER RIG– was tracked down with Mondo, the man who kept the Denver Choppers image alive. We caught them with the crew from Speed Vision rolling film, as Mondo discussed chopper history. Bringing us to present date, Brenda can be seen riding his New School? creation. We?ll keep you posted when this will air?

LA CALENDAR SHOW AIRES–The 2003 Los Angeles Calendar Motorcycle Show on American ThunderThe American Thunder episode on Speed TV with awesome 2003 L.A. Calendar Motorcycle Show coverage premiered on Tuesday, September 9th. It will re-air on Tuesday, October 28th at 10:00pm ET. Mark your Mikuni/Performance Machine sponsored Iron & Lace Calendar now.

You can also catch complete coverage of this year’s LA Calendar Motorcycle Show with pictures online at:http://www.FastDates.com/BikeShow2003/BIKESHOW2003.HTM

And don’t forget you’re invited to join us October 11th at 9pm in Hollywood for the Iron & Lace Calendar Party at Barfly! More details at http://www.FastDates.com/IRONLACE01.HTM

–Jim Gianatsis

WHAT BUSINESSES CAN LEARN FROM A METEORIC RISE…AND A CATASTROPHIC DESCENT: PANEL THURSDAY, MINNEAPOLIS–Turnaround Management Association presents a panel discussion: “The Rise and Fall of Excelsior-Henderson” (includes hors d’oeuvres; cash bar, panel, and networking).

Panelists: Excelsior-Henderson founder/CEO Dan Hanlon and his Directors of Finance, Legal Affairs, and Sales & MarketingDate/Time: Thursday, September 18, 3:30- 7 p.m. (panel from 4-6 p.m.)

Location: Solera (formerly Bravo Entertainment Center), 900 Hennepin Avenue, Minneapolis

Cost: $30 for members, $45 for non-members

Preregistration preferred: www.uppermidwest.turnaround.org, fax: 763-533-2144

Sometimes, business managers and marketers can learn more from failure than from success. Excelsior-Henderson experienced both. Starting the first new American motorcycle company in decades, the company quickly built brand loyalty and market share-but it wasn’t enough to keep an ultra-capital-intensive luxury goods venture alive when the economy and capital markets lost momentum.

Publicly, for the first time since the descent of the company, Dan Hanlon, the passionate entrepreneur willing to follow his charismatic dream, and his Directors of Finance (Randy Strobel), Legal Affairs (Mark Sides), and Sales & Marketing (Joel Norenberg), will share a discussion on the venture’s rapid rise and fall with members and guests of the Turnaround Management Association Thursday evening over dinner, at Solera, 900 Hennepin Ave, Minneapolis.

This entertaining and informative talk will touch on such ideas as:
* How to recruit talent for a company with no revenue, negative cash flow, and going out of business
* How to get your company name tattooed on your customer’s body
* Creating a corporate culture where everyone is both equal and different, and making it work

This panel discussion coincides with Hanlon’s recently published book, Riding The American Dream, subtitled “Surviving Road Rash & Living To Tell About It,” which chronicles the story in more detail. The book will be available at the event, or by calling 800-584-0886, and also on the internet at www.ridingtheamericandream.com.

The event, including dinner and talk, is open to the public.In 2003, Turnaround Management Association (www.turnaround.org) celebrates its 15th year of leading the way to rebuild corporate value worldwide.

PINEY WOODS POEM–A few lines of thought from the piney woods of Central Texas.

Learning to Fly

Still remember that day
Just after the rain
An old Cushman Eagle
Kick start and away

Always remember your first
I can still see it today
A ride of 50 ft
Back end slides away

Really not hurt
Except for my pride
To my feet quickly
Pulled up bike from its side

I learned a lesson that day
Many years have gone by
Some times you fall
While you’re learning to fly
Ode To A Biker

The feel of riding is hard to describe
Although I’ve done it most of my life
From a used Cushman Eagle
To a new V-Twin
Every time I climb on
I get that feeling again.

Call me a biker or old scooter trash
I perk up my ears when I hear one pass.
I was born with that need
It’s part of my soul
Just kick it over and feel
The wind as you roll.

Something that I’ll never understand
What puts that need inside of a man
It’s almost like flying with
Lightly touching the ground
Just twist the grip and hear
That beautiful sound.

Now in my fifties a little
Slower in step
My heart still pumps 60 wt
For what time I have left
I’m going to ride and build
Til I no longer can
When they put me away
I’ll still have grease on my hands.

See ya down the road.

–from the Pen of Parts

VINTAGE MOTORCYCLE AUCTION NEWS–Harley Davidson’s, Sprints, and 1960’s Vintage: 50+ Classic Harley Davidson’s , Many Parts & Accessories

ESTATE SALE
Friday, Sept. 19 at 10 a.m.
25 W. Old Liberty Road
Sykesville, MD 21784

50+ Harley Davidson Bikes/Scooters & Frames; 1936 Ford Roadster, (18) 1965 & ’66+ Ford Mustangs; Restored 1936, ’42, ’47 Ford Trucks; Antique and Collectible Ford Mustangs & Harley Parts; Collectable Ford & Fordson Tractors; 1966 restored Ford Ranchero

Online Bidding Available for this AuctionTo participate in online bidding or to place a proxy bid, you must register for this auction by 4pm on Thursday, September 18th.

To find out more about online bidding, visit our web site at www.americanaai.com .

MORE DETAILS,Complete automotive machine shop to include 1000’s of automotive and motorcycle parts, wheels, belts, engines, gas tanks, cables, lathes, sanders, grinders, hydraulic bearing press, band saws, air compressors, welders, jacks, test equipment, battery chargers, power and hand tools, impact tools, generators, riding mowers, bush-hog, 3-point tractor attachments, (15) chain saws, Woods front end loader attachment, farm equipment, Trailers, antique tractors, automotive memorabilia. Collectable Falcons, Comet, 1940’s Ford with suicide doors; Mustang fenders gas caps, grills, wheels, special parts, etc; Harley parts, seats, gas tanks, Ford flathead v-8 motors etc; Household items, furniture, kitchenware, wall hangings, glassware, collectible magazines and much much more.

For more photos, terms, inspection dates, and directions, please visit our web site.About American Auctions & Appraisals, Inc.American is a professional firm serving financial institutions, attorneys, accountants, and trustees, in a wide variety of appraisal and liquidation procedures throughout the United States.

Company Website: http://americanaai.com

Contact Information
P.O. Box 1346 Hunt Valley, MD 21031-6346
fax: 410.876.8782
e-mail: auction@americanaai.com
voice: 410-876-8210

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A storm hammers one coast while the sun shines on the other. That’s the way of the world. One day you’re flying high, the next you can’t get out of bed. It’s all about attitude.

Let’s get to the news. I need to jump into the garage and complete the revised Beach Ride Bike seat pan. I need some blacksmith, sheet metal training.

BRAND NEW ART PRINT FROM CHRIS KALLAS–OLD SCHOOL–Old School is the newest release from motorcycle artist Chris Kallas.This painting of a classic chopper is now available as a lithograph print.Printed on premium 80 lb. acid-free cover stock, they measure 18″x24″(image size: 13 1/2″x 17 5/8″). They are available as a signed limited editionof 250 for $39.95 or unsigned for $19.95 (plus $5 for shipping).

Chris Kallas art prints are available in the Bikernet Gulch.http://www.bikernet.com/catalog/onlinecatalog.asp?Category=Art+Prints

Later toward the weekend we’ll launch a heartfilled story about a young man’s first Panhead. Chris allowed us to used his masterful painting to illustrate it.

The Jay Hodge prison cell.

THE PRISON REPORT–I have long said that Prisons are Big Business and many people are in Prison to help them run and make Money.

I realized that in the 70s when the Sheriff in my home town explained to me he had a monthly round up of local drunks and vagrants. He used them to staff his jail crew.

In many cases it was a good deal for both sides. He got good dependable help from non violent inmates and the inmates got off the street and out of the elements that would have surely killed or seriously injured them. When they sobered up, they had to work and then were released to spend their monthly check from the Government (Social Security and Military Mostly) then back in. The old Revolving Door Policy.

Through the years I have watch this type of things go on and prisons and other institutions being staffed by non violent inmates. They are the work horses. And with out them the prisons would have a hard time running. Of course you could have the guards do some of the work But what the hey You Crazy Dude.

Now there is a Big Move in Florida and other places around the country to Privatize the Prisons.

Wackenhut a company that already runs two Florida Prisons (For Profit) is pushing to take over more.

Now Stop And Think. If Prisons Were Not Big Money Makers Why Would A Company Like Wackenhut Want To Take Them Over.

Florida State Prisons Make Money Also. They just present the facts differently and omit a lot when they tell the citizens what is going on and Use The Crime Fear Tactic to Promote more Money and Prisons. Of course the Jail and Prison Guards are fighting this attempted take over by Wackenhut because they do not want to loose their gravy train.

While I was employed at American Quantum Motorcycle Company they were in negotiations with Wackenhut for inmate labor, and I got to find out how a lot of it worked. The State Pays to house the inmates. Wackenhut looks for those with long sentences. They charge outside businesses X amount of money per hour per inmate. Usually minimum wage or less. Lets say $7.00 per hour. The inmate gets $3.00 – Wackenhut gete$3.00 ? and the other dollar disappears. When I asked where it went I was told it was none of my business.

Now there is no overtime, medical, vacations, etc. You Get The Picture right. Now that the inmate has an income he is charged for toilet articles, medical etc. from the jail at higher prices that you or I could buy the stuff on the street. So they got money coming in from all sides. And as long as that doesn?t get out there little racket goes on.

Prisons Can Run With No Tax Payer Money. They Have Slave Labor and Can Make Money and Be Self Supporting.

That is why they want to Put People in Prison For A Long Period of Time. They prefer those with drug and other non violent offenses. They want people to work in their institutions. They can call it what they want but if you take a close look at it you will realize that Prisons Are Big Money To Those That Run Them.

Just In Case You Haven?t Been Paying Attention. You May Want To See How Many Inmates Are BIKERS. Yes This Does Belong On A Biker Site.

–Rogue

HARLEY-DAVIDSON EXCEEDS EXPECTATIONS AND MAKES RECORD DONATION TO THE MUSCULAR DYSTROPHY ASSOCIATION–$7.2 million check presented to MDA during company’s anniversary celebration

Harley-Davidson Motor Company surpassed its 100th Anniversary celebration fundraising goal by presenting a check to the Muscular Dystrophy Association for $7,286,191.57, making Harley-Davidson MDA’s top corporate partner for 2003. Harley-Davidson Motor Company President and Chief Operating Officer Jim McCaslin made the announcement during the 100th Anniversary Party on Sunday, August 31 in Milwaukee, WI. The company set an original goal of raising $5 million for the Muscular Dystrophy Association.

The Harley-Davidson family of customers, dealers employees and suppliers conducted various fundraising activities including rider pledges, dealer fundraisers, motorcycle raffles and pin sales. Fundraising activities for the Muscular Dystrophy Association took place worldwide over the 14-month period leading up to the Harley-Davidson Anniversary Celebration in Milwaukee.

“We considered our 100th Anniversary fundraising goal for the Muscular Dystrophy Association to be ambitious, but we knew it could happen with hard work from everyone involved,” said McCaslin. “I’m personally grateful to our customers, dealers, employees and suppliers who rose to the occasion and helped us not only meet but surpass our expectations.”

The 100th Anniversary of Harley-Davidson marked the 23rd year the Motor Company has been associated with the Muscular Dystrophy Association. During that time, the Harley-Davidson family of customers, dealers, employees and suppliers have raised more than $47 million to aid research and program services for children and adults with neuromuscular disease. The Funds raised at the various 100th Anniversary events will help support life-saving research, comprehensive medical care and the very special MDA Summer Camp.

NEW MODEL CHROMED FORK LEG CAP–” Cause acorn nuts are for squirrels,” The owner Chris Hill commented about his new product, in reference to the old’ nut washer stock combo. Now you can replace that unsightly unit with something billet precision engineered. Check ChrisHD.com

–Chris Hill
949-254-4889

6th ANNUAL STEEL PONY EXPRESS” MOTORCYCLE RALLY AND MUSIC FESTIVAL–The Steel Pony Express VI Motorcycle Rally & Music Festival takes place October 23rd,24th, 25th & 26th in New Orleans along scenic Lake Pontchartrain at UNO Field. The four-day festival consists of events for the entire weekend. The fun begins on Thursday, October 23rd with an Open House at Harley-Davidson of New Orleans and the Official Kick Off Party Thursday Night at the Dock, located along scenic Lake Pontchartrain (minutes from the rally grounds).

Friday through Sunday, the Rally grounds will be open and will boast an awesome line up of over 15 bands with Aaron Tippin, STYX AND CCR HEADLINING and some of Louisiana’s best, including Jazz, Blues, Zydeco, Gospel and more! Enjoy the New Orleans Food Pavilion, featuring the best food in the world. Shop the vendor village, with over 150 of the major manufactures, displaying their Big Rigs & the premier vendors selling everything from chrome to boots to parts._

COME MEET THIS YEARS MASTERS OF CEREMONIES–Paul Teutul Sr. & Paul Teutul Jr. of ORANGE COUNTY CHOPPERS AND DISCOVERY CHANNELS #1 rated show AMERICAN CHOPPER. Plus, come meet and see these Top Custom Bike Builders IN THE WORLD– showing off their most radical designs with: Jesse James of West Coast Choppers OF DISCOVERY CHANNELS MONSTER GARAGE, returning for a 3rd year, Jim Nasi, Eddie Trotta, Kendall Johnson, Billy Lane, Jeff Nicklus of Desperado Motorcycles, and. local boys Ivy Trosclair Sr. &Jr. of Metry Customs.

Scheduled attractions this year include Rhett Rotten Wall of Death, Team Extreme Sport Bike Stunt Team, and the Hardly Angels World Renound All Female Motorcycle Drill Team. Also, the Purrfect Angelz are back by popular demand, to heat up the stage! Take part in the Boardwalk Ride in bike show, Bike Games, Guided Destination Rides & much more! On Sunday, join us for the Worlds Largest Jazz N? Blues Biker Brunch, serving up a traditional New Orleans Brunch! Rally packages starting at just $50 (including T-Shirt, Pin and brunch until Sept. 23), Day Passes at $20. Great discounted hotel packages available now, with secure bike parking, located in the French Quarter (just 10 minutes from the Rally Grounds). Vendors are welcome-RV and Motorcoach camping available on site for Vendors. So, come pass a good time in N?awlins & Let the Good Times Roll at Steel Pony Express! VI!

Contact:Karol Brandt
Phone:1-877-991-7433 (Toll Free)
E-mail:karol@scooterpromotions.com
Web:http://www.steelponyexpress.com_ _

RON FINCH IN AMERICAN RIDER–Ron’s latest creation will shine on the pages of American Rider in a couple of months. I’m honored with the assignment to write the story. I may dig up an old interview with this historical, artistic builder and post it on the site. Hang on.

BIKERNET RELATIONSHIP ADVICE–A man took his wife to the State Fair and one of theexhibits is that of breeding bulls.

They went up to the first pen and there was a sign that said, “This bullmated 50 times last year.” The wife poked her husband in the ribs andsaid, “He mated 50 times last year.”

They walked a little further and saw another pen with a sign that said,”This bull mated 120 times last year.” The wife hit her husband and said,”That’s more than twice a week! You could learn a lot from him.”

They walked further and a third pen had a bull with a sign saying, “Thisbull mated 365 times last year.” The wife got really excited and said,”That’s once a day. You could REALLY learn something from this one.”

The husband looked at her and said, “Go up and ask him if it was with thesame cow.”

SCREAMIN’ EAGLE DRAG TEAM RUNS STRONG AT INDY–Both Riders Advance to Second Round of Eliminations; Hines Sets Fastest Speed.The Screamin’ Eagle/Vance & Hines drag racing team advanced to the second round of Pro Stock Bike eliminations in the rain-delayed 49th Annual Mac Tools U.S. Nationals at Indianapolis Raceway Park, the most prestigious stop on the National Hot Rod Association POWERade Drag Racing Series.

Riders GT Tonglet and Andrew Hines both qualified for Sunday’s elimination rounds, returning to Indianapolis Raceway Park on Friday, Sept. 5 to complete qualifying rounds that were interrupted the previous weekend by consecutive days of rainy weather. Hines qualified his V-Rod second-quickest with a run 7.162 seconds at 190.65 mph (the fastest top speed recorded during the weekend), while Tonglet was sixth qualifier with a best run of 7.190/189.92 aboard his V-Rod. Defending U.S. Nationals champion Angele Savoie (7.154/189.12) was the top qualifier.

Sunday’s Pro Stock Bike elimination rounds turned out to be a red-light festival, as 10 of 15 match-ups were decided when one rider jumped the start, including an NHRA pro-class record six red lights in eight runs of the first round. Tonglet was on the winning end of one of those red lights, when Blaine Hale jumped the start. Tonglet saved his engine and coasted across the line with a 8.377/113.92 run. Hines just shaved the good side of the light on his first run, with a reaction time of 0.006 seconds and a run of 7.288/185.74 to beat Michael Phillips (7.326/179.66).

In the second round, both Hines and Tonglet delivered strong runs, with ETs good enough to win, but both jumped the start and redlighted. Hines (7.281/180.65) lost to Antron Brown (7.366/182.85), while Tonglet (7.251/189.34) lost to Shawn Gann (7.270/184.52).

“The competition in Pro Stock Bike is so close this season that every rider feels the need to cut a really good light to win,” said Hines after the event.

“We are running great times,” added Tonglet, “and the Screamin’ Eagle team will keep its focus and come back strong for the next event.”

In the final round, Reggie Showers (7.264/181.40) proved just how important a split-second at the start can be when he be beat Gann (7.232/188.04) off the line with a 0.021 reaction time to Gann’s 0.054, and won the final by an scant 0.001 sec. It was the first NHRA Pro Stock Bike victory for Showers.

The next stop for the Pro Stock Bike class on the 2003 National Hot Rod Association POWERade Drag Racing Series is the 19th Annual Lucas Oil NHRA Nationals, Sept. 11-14 at Maple Grove Raceway near Reading, Pa.

Screamin’ Eagle Performance Parts are inspired by and built in the spirit of the raw adrenaline and power of motorcycle racing, offering both racing-grade and street-legal performance options for the Harley-Davidson motorcycle owner. Visit www.harley-davidson.com for more information.

Continued On Page 2

Author and freedom fighter Bill Bish.

THE AIM/NCOM MOTORCYCLE E-NEWS SERVICE is brought to you by Aid to Injured Motorcyclists (A.I.M.) and the National Coalition of Motorcyclists (NCOM), and is sponsored by the Law Offices of Richard M. Lester. For more information, call us at 1-(800) ON-A-BIKE or visit us on our website at <>

COAST TO COAST BIKER NEWS
Compiled & Edited by Bill Bish,
National Coalition of Motorcyclists

CONGRESSMAN CHARGED IN BIKER’S DEATH South Dakota Congressman Bill Janklow has been charged with second-degree manslaughter in the deadly crash that claimed the life of 55-year-old Minnesota motorcyclist Randolph Scott when the legislator ran a stop sign at a rural intersection near Sioux Falls on Saturday, August 16. Police investigators determined that Rep. Janklow’s Cadillac proceeded through the intersection at speeds estimated between 70-75 mph in the 55 mph zone, and continued into the path of Scott’s Harley-Davidson without stopping, giving the rider no chance to avoid the fatal collision.

Janklow, 63, has a long history of speeding, and his driving exploits have been near legendary in his home state during his many years of public service. At one point during his 30-year political career, the four-term governor racked up 12 speeding tickets in four years.

Janklow served as attorney general from 1974-78 before being elected to four terms as governor, from 1979-1986 and 1995-2002, and was elected to the state’s lone House seat last year. During his tenure as governor, the pugnacious Republican was credited with elevating the Sturgis rally into a tourist attraction, and in 2001 he was inducted into the Sturgis Motorcycle Museum Hall of Fame. In addition to the felony manslaughter charge, which carries a maximum penalty of up to ten years in prison and a $10,000 fine, Janklow has also been charged with failure to stop, speeding and reckless driving, the latter charges being misdemeanors.

The charges brought against Janklow represent the maximum allowable under South Dakota state law, and if convicted of manslaughter he would lose his authority to vote in the U.S. House of Representatives under terms of the House Ethics Rules.

NEVADA COURTHOUSE CANNOT BAN BIKER GARB A federal judge has permanently struck down Carson City Courthouse rules that prevented bikers from wearing their insignia or “colors” into the courthouse. The decision by U.S. District Judge Philip Pro finalized the preliminary injunction he granted last October against the First Judicial District Court in Carson City, Carson City Justice Court and other officials.

“It’s a huge victory for motorcycle clubs,” said Richard Eckhardt of Sparks, president of His Royal Priesthood, a Christian-based biker group that belongs to the Northern Nevada Confederation of Clubs, which initiated the lawsuit.

Eckhardt and nine other bikers were cited for trespassing at the Carson City courthouse on March 26, 2001 for refusing an order from court security officers to either remove their motorcycle jackets or leave the public building. They were among the 35 or more motorcycle riders who showed up at the courthouse that day in support of two Branded Few Motorcycle Club members who had been arrested two weeks earlier on the same charge.

The initial incident involved bikers Scot Banks and Steve Dominguez of Reno, who went to the courthouse to contest a traffic citation but were told by security officers that they couldn’t wear their swastika-decorated colors inside. They were arrested for criminal trespassing and their vests were confiscated after they refused the officers’ ultimatum.

But Carson City District Judge William Maddox told the Reno Gazette-Journal that while the ruling restricts a broad ban on wearing biker insignia into the courthouse, judges could still dictate what people can or cannot wear in their courtrooms. Pro noted in his decision that judges have the power in particular cases or circumstances to restrict what people wear.

“A judge is like the proverbial 800-pound gorilla who can do whatever he pleases within his own courtroom,” explained Richard Lester, founder of Aid to Injured Motorcyclists, whose group of nationwide civil rights attorneys were party to the ensuing lawsuit. Lester referred to a recent incident in Utah where a judge barred members of Bikers Against Child Abuse (BACA) from wearing their colors into the courtroom during the trial of an accused child molester.

In making the injunction permanent, Pro also granted summary judgment to the thirteen bikers who filed suit in federal court to overturn the courthouse rules, allowing them to collect legal fees and damages.

“The First Amendment is alive and well, fortunately, but people are still trying to attack its freedoms on a daily basis,” said Reno lawyer Don Evans, who represented the 13 plaintiffs. Evans is the Aid to Injured Motorcyclists (AIM) attorney for Northern Nevada and serves as legal counsel to the Northern Nevada Confederation of Clubs.

WISCONSIN “ANTI-HELMET” BILL HEARD Wisconsin State Senator Dave Zien is a long time biker, a founder of the bikers’ rights movement in Wisconsin and an active member of the National Coalition of Motorcyclists’ Legislative Task Force (NCOM-LTF). So it’s no surprise that when Wisconsin’s high court recently ruled that an injured ATV rider’s damage award could be reduced by up to 100% because he wasn’t wearing a helmet, Senator Zien stepped up to protect street riders from suffering a similar fate.

On August 26 Zien returned from a Guinness World Record ride through 48 states in eight days to testify in favor of Senate Bill 223, which he sponsored along with six other state Senators and seventeen state Representatives. The bill would prevent courts from reducing damages awarded in lawsuits based on whether the driver of a motorcycle, all-terrain vehicle or snowmobile was wearing a helmet when an accident occurred. The legislation would effectively nullify the 2002 state Supreme Court decision in Stehlik v. Rhoads that upheld a jury’s authority to consider helmet use in awarding damages, according to the Legislative Reference Bureau analysis of the proposal.

The bill does, however, allow the introduction of such evidence in cases against a helmet manufacturer for any alleged product or design defect, or to determine whether a helmet contributed to the personal injury or property damage suffered by another person. Wisconsin does not have a law requiring adult motorcyclists to wear helmets, but the court’s decision created its own de facto helmet law by penalizing riders who don’t wear helmets, said David Dwyer, legislative chairman for ABATE of Wisconsin. Dwyer told the Milwaukee Journal newspaper that the court decision penalizes motorcyclists injured in accidents, even if others are clearly at fault. Zien remains convinced that helmets contribute to accidents by reducing head mobility, vision and hearing. “I will go to the grave believing that helmets should be freedom of choice and that helmets, in my opinion, cause accidents,” Zien, an Eau Claire Republican, said.

The Wisconsin legislature repealed its mandatory helmet law in 1978 after overriding a gubernatorial veto.

“This legislation is necessary to protect those who ride and those who exercise their right to choose whether or not to wear a helmet,” Zien said. “Let’s let those who ride decide and not allow the court system to implement another mandatory helmet law.”The bill received a public hearing in the Senate Committee on Judiciary, Corrections and Privacy Aug. 26. The committee has not yet voted on a decision.

MOTORCYCLE SAFETY EFFORT NEEDS YOUR HELP United States Senator Ben Nighthorse Campbell (R-CO) has introduced a resolution in Congress to designate May 2004 as National Motorcycle Safety and Awareness Month, but your help is needed to get the measure adopted. Please contact your U.S. Senators and request that they support Senate Resolution 168, and make our federal legislators aware of motorcyclists’ overwhelming support for this effort.

Although virtually every state and major municipality has issued “Motorcycle Awareness” proclamations over the past several years, no such Congressional resolution has ever been passed to bring national awareness to motorcycle safety.

“Motorcycles have become a big part of the American landscape and occupy a very important position in the history of this nation,” said Campbell in introducing S.RES.168, adding that “As we continue to move through the riding season, I will continue to work with my colleagues here in the Senate and motorcycle rights groups such as the National Coalition of Motorcyclists, the American Motorcycle Association, Motorcycle Safety Foundation, ABATE, and the Motorcycle Riders Foundation to find solutions to educate the general motoring public about motorcycle safety and awareness. This resolution is a strong, positive step in the right direction to help achieve this goal.”

Campbell has been riding for more than 50 years and has been a champion for motorcyclists’ issues on the federal level, including serving on the NCOM Legislative Task Force.

NEW YORK ENACTS “LEMON LAW” PROTECTION FOR MOTORCYCLES Governor George E. Pataki has signed legislation aimed to include motorcycles in the state’s “Lemon Law” protections against faulty and defective vehicles.

According to ABATE of New York, the new Motorcycle Lemon Law (companion bills S.4500 and A.5218) will give all buyers of motorcycles the same consumer protections that automobile buyers have. Montana passed a similar law earlier this year.

MOTORCYCLE SALES TAKE OFF IN JULY Motorcycle sales rose 20 percent in July compared to the same month last year, according to figures recently released by the Motorcycle Industry Council, as improved weather in the Midwest and East Coast spurred sales that had been stagnated by rain earlier in the year.

Harley-Davidson, Honda, Yamaha, Suzuki, Kawasaki and other motorcycle manufacturers sold 99,634 motorcycles and scooters in July 2003, a welcome jump from the 83,034 units sold during the same time frame in 2002. Sales of “on-highway” models, a segment of the industry dominated by Harley cruisers, also rose 20 percent to 69,082.

Wet weather earlier in the year contributed to a 3.2 percent decline in Harley-Davidson’s first-quarter domestic sales, the Motor Company’s first such drop in U.S. sales since 1994.

WEIRD NEWS OF THE MONTH: NO NUDES IS GOOD NUDES The threat of scrapes and bruises, not to mention sunburn, didn’t stop the fledgling North American Nude Bikers club from holding its first rally over the July 26-27 weekend. Events at the Rock Haven Lodge Family Nudist Park near Murfreesboro, Tennessee included a barbecue, live music, bike games and a poker run — where bikers vie for the best hand by drawing cards at stops along the way. They don’t actually ride naked. Mostly.

“You’ve got to be real careful or you’re liable to get something burnt or hurt,” club Vice President Allen “Anchor” Turner told the Associated Press. Turner, 46, came up with the idea for the group last November.

Participants said the values of trust, respect and freedom are common to both nudists and bikers. “It’s all about living a freer lifestyle,” said Turner, who has been a biker for 15 years and a nudist for five.

When not astride their choppers, the bikers mixed with the rest of Rock Haven’s members and visitors by swimming in the pool, playing volleyball and soaking up the sun. Turner said he wanted to dispel the myth that the nudist culture was perverse. “This is a family park,” he said; “Anyone perpetrating lewd shenanigans in public areas is immediately booted out.”

QUOTABLE QUOTES: “The United States is putting together a Constitution now for Iraq. Why don’t we just give them ours? It’s served us well for 200 years, and we don’t appear to be using it anymore, so what the hell?” Jay Leno, Host of NBC?s “Tonight Show”