BIKERNET HOLIDAY NEWS–GET DRUNK AND HIDE

Ah, the Thursday before Christmas. One stinking week to pull all your shit together. Seems impossible? It is, but don’t stress. Do what you can and know that if your friends are worth their salt, present or not, they’ll know you’re thinking of them (in one way or another).

So be careful, put the guns away, break out the firewood, whiskey and spend a warm evening with the woman you love. If ya can’t ride, kick back with a CCI catalog and ponder the impending riding season just a couple of months away. Let’s hit it:

Click to order Catalog!

BRAND NEW CUSTOM CHROME CATALOG RELEASED–

Custom Chrome’s new offering for 2004. The California based distributor brings you the most comprehensive product offering in the Harley-Davidson aftermarket! At over 1,200 pages and over 22,000 part numbers, their 2004 Catalog features the new RevTech 110 Motor, Hard Core II, Ares bikekits and noumious frames and forks–everything from nuts & bolts to performance products. It’s the Custom Bike Bible for the year.

ONLY $9.95 + 6.95 Shipping**

MERRY CHRISTMAS, GODDAMNIT–Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit our best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, non-addictive, gender neutral, celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of your choice, with respect for the religious/secular persuasions and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all…

And a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling, and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2004, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make America great (not to imply that America is necessarily greater than any other country or is the only “AMERICA” in the Western Hemisphere), and without regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith, or sexual preference of the wishee.

(By accepting this greeting, you are accepting these terms. This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for her/himself or others, and is void where prohibited by law, and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year, or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher.)

–from Rogue

BIKERNET LEGAL ADVICE–Why lawyers should never ask a witness a question if they aren’t prepared for the answer:

In a trial, a Southern small town prosecuting attorney called his firstwitness to the stand — a grandmotherly, elderly woman. He approachedher and asked, “Mrs. Jones, do you know me?”

She responded, “Why, yes I do know you, Mr.Williams. I’ve known yousince you were a young boy, and frankly, you’ve been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you’re a big shot when you haven’t the brains to realize you never will amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.”

The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, “Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?”

She again replied, “Why yes, I do. I’ve known Mr.Bradley since he was ayoungster, too. He’s lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. Hecan’t build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. Yes, I know him.”

The defense attorney almost died. The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench, and in a very quiet voice, said, “If either of you bastards asks her if she knows me, you’ll be jailed for contempt.”

BIKERNET BOOKEEPING ADVICE–A Mafia Godfather finds out that his bookkeeper has taken him for ten million bucks. This bookkeeper happens to be deaf, so the Godfather brings along his attorney, who knows sign language.

The Godfather asks the bookkeeper: “Where is the 10 million bucks you embezzled from me?” The attorney, using sign language, asks the bookkeeper where the 10 million dollars is hidden.

The bookkeeper signs back: “I don’t know what you are talking about.”

The attorney tells the Godfather: “He says he doesn’t know what you’re talking about.”

That’s when the Godfather pulls out a 9 mm pistol, puts it to the bookkeeper’s temple, cocks it and says: “Ask him again!”

The attorney signs to the underling:”He’ll kill you for sure if you don’t tell him!”

The bookkeeper signs back: “OK! You win! The money is in a brown briefcase, buried behind the shed in my cousin Enzo’s backyard in Queens!”

The Godfather asks the attorney: “Well, what’d he say?”

The attorney replies: “He says you don’t have the balls to pull the trigger.”

–from Chris T.

BIKERNET TRAVEL ADVICE–A bus full of really ugly people died in a wreck. As they were all standingin line in heaven, God decided to grant every one of them one wish forhaving had to endure a life of misery for being so unattractive.

The first person said, “I want to be beautiful,” so God made it happen.

The second person then said, “I want to be beautiful,” so God made ithappen again.

This continues all the way through the line, with each person wishing to bemade beautiful.

However, as this was going on God noticed that the man at the end of theline was laughing. Not only was he laughing, but as each person expressedtheir wish to be made beautiful, the man continued to laugh harder andharder, until he was laughing hysterically.

When the man’s turn finally came up, God asked him for his wish.

The man said, “Make ’em all ugly again.”

–from Richard

PERFORMANCE MACHINE GOES TELEVISION–Tune in to the Speed Channels, American Thunder this Tuesday night and every Tuesday night for the rest of December to follow the build up of the wildest custom bike Performance Machine has ever attempted.

We let the crew from American Thunder play voyeur in our super secret R&D Department and they have the scoop on some of the most innovative products PM has developed for 2004. You’ll have to see it to believe it as the PM build team scrambles against all odds and a brutal timeline to complete the bike for a Hot Bike Magazine cover shoot. Check it all out on American Thunder on the Speed Channel, Tuesday nights at 7:00 Pacific Time.

–David Zemla
Art Director
Performance Machine Inc.

PANHEAD IN THE NEWS WILL ROCK READER’S SHOWCASE– THANKS for featuring my Panhead on the Thursday news!! It was a great thrill to see my bike on the website…

I read your news flashes every chance I get, and I can’t wait to tell some of my ridin’ bros to look me up on your site!

I started reading Sam Orwell and it’s got me hooked.

It was too cool to see my bike on the same page as Indian Larry and Billy Lane. It made my day.

RIDE ON CHOPPERS 4 EVER.
Kevin Flynn from Niagara Falls

We’re going to take his classic Pan a step further. I sent it to CrazyHorse to be featured in the Reader’s Showcase department of Bikernet. You can feature your bike on Bikernet by slipping into the Reader’s Showcase area. Don’t miss it.

THE LUCKY DEVIL TEAM RETURNS–Lucky Devil Metal Works rose from the fiery depths nine months ago to begin its dominance on earth. The owners Kent Weeks & Eric Joly have established a reputation for building bikes that are unique in design and for their trick parts.

They both have well-established backgrounds in the motorcycling community having come from different aspects of the profession. It seems the adventure is about to become a family affair with Kent’s wife coming on board to handle the office duties and bringing along her years of experience working for two factory H-D stores in Houston.

As you enter the shop there is a pretty cool front display area large enough for a few bikes, the normal shop merchandise, a sitting area to kick back and relax with a cool beverage. The H-D cooler is stocked with a variety of items, one being their own Lucky Devil bottled water. Taken from the brow sweat of the thousands of little demons out back in the devils workshop filing, smoothing and grinding on the custom bikes.

Kent’s a master welder (for 12 years), and it’s his main passion. The motorcycling community is fortunate that he likes shaping sheet metal, too. Once we entered back stage area of the “Devils Workshop” Kent showed us a Softail, or at least that’s what it was when it entered the building. This is one long, low and lean bike. Check out that front grillwork.

The custom touches are all over this bike from the in-shop made rockers and axle spacers, to the two-piece front exhaust pipe for easy removal. The pipes run between the frame and engine and will will be connected to the heads with springs like drag bikes.

Ya gotta check out the Texas 3D metal work! There ain’t no bondo there boys, just some very impressive metal work. That’s all hand formed metal.

Lucky Devil Metal Works offers limited edition accessories. There are point covers, derby and chain inspection plates. They are currently working with Rick Fairless of Strokers in Dallas on additional designs.

They also manufacture a clean clutch cable bracket for converting to foot clutch, that allows the stock foot shifter to be used for the clutch. I ordered one for myself. No trans shifter available at this time. He is also working on a heavy-duty kick ass shifter arm that he started fabricating for a client, who has since disappeared. I’ll take it. He also began a cobra shifter arm. There’s more, the unique devil’s tail license plate/taillight brackets and top motor mounts too.

Kent spent two hours showing us the shop and some of the previous bikes they have built. Most of bikes were long gone. They did a great job of documenting their work and will upgrade their website in the near future. So continue to check back.

I’m sorry I missed the opportunity to meet Eric and look forward to insight into the second half of this creative team in the future. Lucky Devil Metal Works perform minor sheet metal fabrication right up to full customs. I’m thinking of taking the little red rigid down there to see what ideas they might have for her.

I will continue to visit to see what’s next to emerge from the bowels of the Devils Workshop!

Later,
Rigid Frame Richard

Click to see more from Lucky Devil

Continued On Page 2

THE BISH INVESTIGATION–MOVIES, RESTAURANTS AND LEGAL WRANGLING

Bill Bish author and freedom fighter.

THE AIM/NCOM MOTORCYCLE E-NEWS SERVICE is brought to you by Aid to Injured Motorcyclists (A.I.M.) and the National Coalition of Motorcyclists (NCOM), and is sponsored by the Law Offices of Richard M. Lester. For more information, call us at 1-(800) ON-A-BIKE or visit us on our website at http://www.ON-A-BIKE.com

COAST TO COAST BIKER NEWS
Compiled & Edited by Bill Bish,
National Coalition of Motorcyclists

CONGRESSMAN FOUND GUILTY IN BIKER’S DEATH, RESIGNS– Representative William Janklow, South Dakota’s lone congressman and former four-term governor, will resign after being found guilty of manslaughter in the death of a Minnesota motorcyclist who crashed his Harley-Davidson into Janklow’s speeding Cadillac as it blew through a stop sign at a rural intersection in eastern South Dakota this summer.

Police investigations revealed that Janklow was driving in excess of 70 mph in a 55 mph zone when he failed to stop and proceeded into the path of motorcyclist Randolph Scott, a 55-year old farmer from Hardwick, MN, who had no chance to avoid the collision.

On December 8th, jurors from Janklow’s boyhood hometown of Flandreau, SD took just five hours of deliberation to reject defense arguments that Janklow was suffering a diabetic episode that impaired his judgment and found him guilty on all counts, including second-degree manslaughter, reckless driving, speeding and running a stop sign. The Moody County jury of eight women and four men was not allowed to hear evidence about Janklow’s prior driving record which included numerous speeding tickets, so they reached their verdict based solely on the facts of the August 18 wreck.

Janklow faces up to 10 years in prison as a result of his conviction, and will be sentenced on January 20th, the effective date of his resignation from the U.S. House of Representatives. He could also face further civil actions by the Scott family.

SENATOR CAMPBELL EXPRESSES CONCERNS TO NHTSA — U.S. Senator Ben Nighthorse Campbell of Colorado, a longtime motorcyclist and champion of bikers’ rights, has sent a letter to the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration expressing concern over NHTSA’s recent actions in regards to motorcycling issues.

In particular, Campbell’s December 10 letter is critical of the federal agency’s attempt to promote helmet laws through the United Nations, and the rewarding of a contract to complete a study of “Characteristics of Motorcycle Operators” which was improperly awarded six months prior to a public comment period requesting input on the study.

Campbell is one of several lawmakers who serve on the National Coalition of Motorcyclists Legislative Task Force (NCOM-LTF), and he has always stepped up to bat on important issues affecting America’s motorcycle riders.

EASY RIDER GETS STAR– Peter Fonda, who directed and co-starred in the iconic 1969 Academy Award-nominated biker flic “Easy Rider,” received the 2,241st Star on the famous Hollywood Walk of Fame on October 22, following in his famous father’s footsteps and hoping to carry on his legacy.

He is the son of Henry Fonda, who died in 1982, and the brother of Jane Fonda – both Oscar winners. His daughter is actress Bridget Fonda and his son Justin Fonda is a cameraman who worked on such films as “Vertical Limit” and “The Last Ride.”

“This is great for me to be able to join my father,” Fonda said at the ceremony. “I certainly hope my daughter and my son can join me soon.”

Fonda’s star is located on Hollywood Boulevard in front of the historic Roosevelt Hotel, while his father’s star is on Vine Street.

As for rumors of an Easy Rider sequel, the 64-year old Fonda recently was quoted as saying, “I’ve got maybe one more motorcycle movie in me.”

EASY RIDER’S GRILL NOW WELCOMES PATCH HOLDERS– The New Mexico Confederation of Clubs is celebrating their first victory! For over a year, an Albuquerque, New Mexico restaurant “Easy Rider?s Grill” (no affiliation to Easyriders magazine) has had a sign posted stating that club colors were not allowed in the restaurant. As a result, the NMCOC had established a boycott of the popular restaurant. The NMCOC contacted the owner of the restaurant and adjacent Easy Rider’s Motorcycle shop about the offending sign, and is pleased to announce that Reinhart “Rhino” Sherman, president of the NMCOC, managed to convince him to remove the sign; therefore the NMCOC considers Easy Rider’s Grill — recently renamed “Rio Grande Big Dog” — to be on the list of COC friendly places.

Members of the NMCOC recently visited Easy Rider’s Grill to celebrate and thank the owner, Clif Fodge. “The COC was really pleased at how open Clif was to speaking with us and resolving this issue,” reports Rhino. “I think most folks are willing to see us in a positive light if we can just talk.”

The NMCOC plans to use this event as a benchmark to convince other New Mexico eating and drinking establishments to remove similar discriminatory signs.

CANADIAN BIKER BEATS NOISE RAP– Ontario Confederation of Clubs independent member Ted Cairns was pulled over on the afternoon of May 18 while riding his 2002 Harley FLSTC at legal speed through the Peterborough area in the Canadian province of Ontario, and was stopped and ticketed for “unnecessary noise.” The police officer ran a tape measure up his Vance and Hines Longshots exhaust system, deemed them illegal on the spot, and handed Cairns a ticket for $110.00.

During his trial on December 8, Cairns lawyer David Ross pointed out to the court that the Highway Traffic Act does not define “unnecessary noise,” and showed the judge several cases of law that have been overturned on this basis. In all these cases the judges ruled that unnecessary noise had to be a direct and purposeful action of the defendant at the time of the charge or the unnecessary noise would not be subject to criminal charges. In Cairn’s case, the Crown Attorney argued that the simple act of switching from a stock exhaust system to the Vance and Hines was the act that created the unnecessary noise. The judge disagreed with the Crown and the case was dismissed.

“We can see that through this decision that Bill 241 (aka the Street Racing and Vehicle Modification Act) is a little less stronger than it used to be,” said Brian Dodds, recording secretary for the Ontario Confederation of Clubs. “By picking away at this ridiculous law, it can be amended or even repealed.”

BIKERS CHALLENGE CANADA’S “ANTI-GANG” LAW– Lawyers representing two Hells Angels MC members charged with extortion want Canada’s new “anti-gang” legislation struck from the Criminal Code. The law violates the Charter of Rights because it is too vague, defense lawyer Paul Burnstein told the Toronto Sun on November 29. He said this is the first constitutional challenge of the 2002 legislation.

The law defines a “criminal organization” as an organized group of three or more that commits serious offences for financial benefit. Burnstein said the definition is “vague” and infringes on the right to associate.

He said it could criminalize harmless or political association, thus violating the charter.

BRITISH POLICE CONFISCATE “NUISANCE MOTORCYCLES” — A four-wheel all terrain vehicle (ATV) and three motorcycles have been confiscated by police in Burnley, UK as part of their continued crackdown on “motorcycle nuisance.” The four vehicles were taken away by police in response to a catalogue of complaints from residents on the Kibble Bank estate about motorbike riding, and owners of the vehicles received verbal and written warnings prior to their bikes being taken away. In removing the vehicles, police were exercising new powers which enable them to seize bikes that are causing alarm, distress or annoyance. Complaints reportedly eased considerably following the seizures, and Burnley police pledge to “keep up the pressure on those reckless motorcyclists.”

OZZY INJURED IN BIKE ACCIDENT– Speaking of Brits and bikes, 55-year old rocker Ozzy Osbourne suffered multiple broken ribs and other injuries when he crashed an ATV on the grounds of his country estate in Buckinghamshire, England on December 8th.

The accident happened during a day off from promoting his new single, “Changes” — a duet recorded with his daughter Kelly.

Osbourne fractured eight ribs and a vertebra in his neck and underwent emergency surgery to reconstruct his left collarbone and restore blood flow to his arm, but doctors said he was comfortable and stable in the hospital, reports Reuters news service.

GIMME MORE– In other celebrity biking news, the National Enquirer reported that actress Demi Moore bought her young lover Ashton Kutcher a brand new motorcycle, but he refused the gift.

Kutcher, who plays the character Kelso in the TV sitcom “That 70’s Show,” reportedly told Moore angrily; “You’ve got to be kidding me! I’m already getting enough crap about our age difference. Now people will start saying I’m your Boy Toy. If I need a motorcycle I’ll buy one myself.”

Moore is almost twice his age, and apparently twice as gutsy.

If he can’t handle it, get out of the kitchen.

UPS YOUR’S– In last month’s column we told readers about a United Parcel Service ad for holiday employment opportunities that played on the negative stereotype of bikers, but enough concerned riders contacted UPS to complain that the company discontinued the print ad and began sending the following response:

“Due to the number of responses we have received, UPS will no longer be running the commercial in question. In no way did UPS intend the commercial to be offensive to motorcycle enthusiasts. We apologize for any objectionable material contained in the commercial.”

WEIRD NEWS OF THE MONTH: BLOWN AWAY– Steve Dass of Walnut Creek, California says strangers stole his money. Dass was riding eastbound on Highway 4 when thousands of dollars flew off the back of his motorcycle. Eyewitnesses say busy freeway traffic came to a halt as dozens of people scrambled for cash. John Craig, a Pittsburg resident, said: “So everybody went crazy, everybody burning rubber, pulling over. So we pulled over, like naturally everybody hopping out…getting money.”

The CHP says Craig was the only one who returned some of the money. $200 dollars was recovered, but Dass is still out $7,000.

A frantic search in, around, and near the freeway turned up nothing. According to Daas, “I was keeping this money for my mother. It was $7,000 and I was going to go give it to her. This money is very important because it’s the last piece of money my mother has for herself.”

The California Highway Patrol says their initial investigation confirms Dass’ story and his intentions. “He told us he was going to use the money to take his mother furniture shopping for her new condo in Antioch,” said a CHP spokesperson. There’s one final component to this sad story: Mr. Dass was recently laid-off from his job.

QUOTABLE QUOTES: “Bad laws are the worst sort of tyranny.”Edmund Burke, British political writer and statesman (1729-97)

Have a Merry Christmas and ride safe, goddamnit.–Marlon

BIKERNET NEWS ALERT–NEW PAUGHCO SPRINGERS, TEXAS TOY RUN AND THE TRUTH ABOUT SANTA

Continued From Page 3

JESSE JAMES BUILDS JAP BIKE–after repeatedly knocking the custom “harley” world flat on its ass mr. James is now gonna do the same thing to the sport bike game.This, is one sick motorcycle.

Should hit the stands jan. 6th. Check it out.

–from Jay Hodge

HAMSTER GIVES BIRTH–Sun Valley, Idaho Hamster Todd Rippo and wife Lisa had a baby Hamsterette, Francesca Jolie, on Monday morning, just to strengthen our Hamster base in Idaho! All is well, baby is 6lbs 12oz. Congratulations!

THE EAST COAST CHALLENGE IS ON– Choppers Unlimited offers completeturn key, super rollers, rollers, frames, and accessories to build chopsfrom mild to wild; bare, primed, powdered, and stainless. What a menu.NEW AT CINCY NEXT YEAR–NEW! 80-spoke, 280 Metzler, seven-inch rim with drive side brake! Stop byand check it out.Choppers Unlimited’s Cincy intro of an industry first 80-spoke 280 rim,dimensions are: The hub is 7-inches, laced to a 10.5″ rim.

NEW! Wide frame for Sportys? Wide frame for Sportys! Chop your XL in style.

–John Siebenthaler
john@siebenthalercreative.com>
www.siebenthalercreative.com

AN ENGINEER’S CHRISTMAS–There are approximately two billion children (persons under 18) in the world. However, since Santa does not visit children of Muslim, Hindu, Jewish, or Buddhist (except maybe in Japan) religions, this reduces the workload for Christmas night to 15% of the total, or 378 million (according to the population reference bureau). At an average (census) rate of 3.5 children per household, that comes to 108 million homes, presuming there is at least one good child in each.

Santa has about 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming east to west (which seems logical). This works out to 967.7 visits per second. This is to say that, for each Christian household with a good child, Santa has around 1/1000th of a second to park the sleigh, hop out, jump down the chimney, fill the stocking, distribute the remaining presents under the tree, eat whatever snacks have been left for him, get back up the chimney, jump into the sleigh, and get onto the next house.

Assuming that each of these 108 million stops is evenly distributed around the earth (which, of course, we know to be false, but will accept for the purposes of our calculations), we are now talking about 0.78 miles per household; a total trip of 75.5 million miles, not counting bathroom stops or breaks.

This means Santa’s sleigh is moving at 650 miles per second–3,000 times the speed of sound. For purposes of comparison, the fastest man-made vehicle, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a poky 27.4 miles per second, and a conventional reindeer can run (at best) 15 miles per hour.

The payload of the sleigh adds another interesting element. Assuming that each child gets nothing more than a medium sized LEGO set (two pounds), the sleigh is carrying over 500 thousands tons, not counting Santa himself. On land, a conventional reindeer can pull no more than 300 pounds. Even granting that the “flying” reindeer can pull 10 times the normal amount, the job can’t be done with eight or even nine of them—Santa would need 360,000 of them. This increases the payload, not counting the weight of the sleigh, another 54,000 tons, or roughly seven times the weight of the Queen Elizabeth (the ship, not the monarch).

600,000 tons traveling at 650 miles per second creates enormous air resistance. This would heat up the reindeer in the same fashion as a spacecraft re-entering the earth’s atmosphere. The lead pair of reindeer would adsorb 14.3 quintillion joules of energy per second each. In short, they would burst into flames almost instantaneously, exposing the reindeer behind them and creating deafening sonic booms in their wake. The entire reindeer team would be vaporized within 4.26 thousandths of a second, or right about the time Santa reached the fifth house on his trip.

Not that it matters, however, since Santa, as a result of accelerating from a dead stop to 650 miles per second in 0.001 seconds, would be subjected to acceleration forces of 17,000 g’s. A 250 pound Santa (which seems ludicrously slim) would be pinned to the back of the sleigh by 4,315,015 pounds of force, instantly crushing his bones and organs and reducing him to a quivering blob of pink goo. Therefore, if Santa did exist, he’s dead now!

Merry Christmas!

–from Bubblehead, AKA, Scrooge

TEXAS TOY RUN–The Red Baron bike was at the toy run and I asked the owner why I have yet to see it in a national magazine? He said that he has submitted to several. The editor ER told him it was the ugliest thing he had seen or something close to that effect. Kinda strange if you ask me.

Here are some images from Sunday’s toy run. There is a shop party this Saturday and then the second toy run on Sunday. I hope we have the same great weather. Usually we get rain & cold for one or the other. Not a lot of cutie pictures, battery died could be the freeway shots ate it up. I’ll have a backup battery soon.

I already heard from the little blonde on the homepage asking if I will send her copies of the pics. That night there were several folks taking photos. I told her and her friend the dark haired cutie “Unlike the rest of these folks I may get your pictures posted on the Internet”. She had already checked out the site yesterday before she sent the e-mail, so I know they are checking in.

Later,

–RFR

LITTLE MARY– Little Mary Margaret was not the best student in Sunday School. Usually she slept through the class.

One day her teacher, a Nun, called on her while she was sleeping.”Tell me Mary Margaret, who created the universe?”

When Mary Margaret didn’t stir, little Johnny who was her friend sitting behind her, took a pin and jabbed her in the rear.

“God Almighty!” shouted Mary Margaret.

The Nun said, “Very good” and continued teaching her class.

A little later the Nun asked Mary Margaret, “Who is our Lord and Savior?”

But she didn’t stir from her slumber. Once again, little Johnny came to the rescue and stuck Mary Margaret in the butt.

“Jesus Christ!” shouted Mary and the Nun once again said “Very good”, and Mary Margaret fell back asleep.

The Nun asked her third question…”What did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child?”

Again, Johnny came to the rescue. This time Mary Margaret jumped up and shouted,”If you stick that damn thing in me one more time, I’ll break it in half!”

The Nun fainted.

–from Ken Miller

JANKLOW– Has Been Found Guilty of All The Charges Against Him

I would like to Thank Everyone Who Has Contacted The Media and Motorcycle Rights Groups.

It goes to prove that we Can Win!

Please Continue to Follow Up and Insist That Janklow Gets Jail Time and Not A Slap On The Wrist.

Now is when he and his pals are going to appeal or try to get some kind of minor sentence.

KILL A BIKER GO TO JAIL!

–Rogue

CLASSIC PAUGHCO SPRINGERS–If you’re looking for the ultimate in a CLASSIC RETRO SPRINGER front end for your new custom or an upgrade for that worn stocker, there’s only one place to go and that’s Paughco.

The Godfather of aftermarket SPRINGERS, Paughco has been manufacturing reproduction and custom SPRINGERS for over three decades. Currently they offer over 90 different variations including stock and custom applications to fit just about any year and model. Paughco SPRINGER assemblies are available in wide and narrow styles, in a variety of lengths, with or without shocks and designed for use with Dog Bone risers or Glide style top clamp.

Most recently they have introduced a model that incorporates their unique “floating fender” assembly. Available finished in Paughco’s durable show quality chrome or new gloss black finish, these classic front ends are priced right and are available from Paughco dealers worldwide or by calling 775-246-5738. Internet www.paughco.com

MERRY MERRY, GODDAMNIT–According to the HORSE, Jesse James challenged OCC to a bike build off. They declined. I wanted to go for it. Bikernet and Jesse James race to Sturgis 2004. Sounds good to me. I gotta get the new shop set up.

Whew, the rest of the week will be spent hammering through articles for American Rider, some of which will end up on Bikernet. I’m interviewing Senator Dave Zien from Wisconsin. We’ll discuss the chances for expanded Right-of-Way laws. He’s a long range rider, just rode from Wisconsin to Phoenix to visit his daughter.

We wrapped up three articles for Cruising Rider recently, although the editor tossed one back on my desk. He wants more words. Lucky the little bastard’s in Sedona. And I’m supposed to meet with the editor of Hard Core Choppers out of Japan this week. We need to work on future assignments.

The most important article project arrived from Irish Rich, of Shamrock Customs, on modifying a VL frame. It’s coming up on Bikernet along with other surprises. Hang on.

Ride forever,

Bandit

BIKERNET NEWS FLASH–CARIBBEAN REPORT, SAMSON SHIELD ALERT, CRAZYHORSE AT WAR WITH BUILDER AND DUAL MIKUNIS FOR SPORTSTERS

Continued From Page 2

BIKERNET CARIBBEAN REPORT–The Puerto Rico Bike Weekend is over, thank God! I don’t know if I could take any more beatings. While trying to finish the choppers we had, setting up everything and hanging out with our guests I slept like 4 hours in six days, yeap, so what the fuck is new?

Indian Larry, Paul Cox, Hank Young, Tim and Jameson were here to participate in the madness, Gennaro ? aka – Chicago Greaser was in charge of documenting everything for The Horse and sharing his photos with me so I can post them all over. I’m writing a story for it after I’m done with the news, so keep your eyes peeled.

One preview I can give is the ride over to the Western town of Rincon. I guess the guys found it an uplifting experience because of no worries about cops, lane directions, stop lights, stop signs or anything else. To sum it up, a 45-minute traffic jam was reduced to 3 minutes by doing what had to be done; the grin stuck to Indian Larry ‘s mug told the whole story. I guess we are used to the ultra defensive driving, which means, get there before anyone else no matter what it takes.

While juggling the whole deal I’m also moving Caribbean Custom Cycles to a new location, it’s about time since the older shop is too small. Soon I will have everything under one roof, including the stripper pole. To top it off, Hank Young of the Flying pan fame got a call from the Biker Build off series to be the next participant, while in Puerto Rico. I know who goes against him but will save it for a later date.

Like I said, we managed to finish two bikes and an almost, well let’s say two almost (one is missing the calipers and primary).I really want to keep on with the Puerto Rico story but I need to save some stuff for my Bikernet report on that, anyway, the guys were super happy to be here (while everyone else was freezing their butts in 20″ of snow) and promised to come back and even in despair of the freak tropical storm that hit the island it was a fun time for all. The burn out pit took some casualties of the rubber kind, the Don Q was freely flowing and the cops were super cool about the whole thing, I almost managed to swipe a cop bike into the pit.

All the visitors got a very good example of our islands hospitality, everyone here was more than elated to have builders of such caliber from the US (I guess they are tired of seeing my face) and there was no rush, no mobs, we did have carte blanche to do what the hell we wanted and let me tell you we really took full advantage of those privileges. I better shut up or I will give the whole story away.

Next year we expect a lot more people, and are planning on setting up containers to get people and their bikes from the US here. Yeap you too can escape the fucking cold and enjoy a rum and coke on the beach in Puerto Rico.

I got to start the work on the new shop, so I’ll cut this short and let the photos do the talking, before I forget, there will be event shirts available at my website pretty soon.

Back to work goddamitt! It’s going to be a sorry ass Christmas for me…..

Jose Bikernet Caribbean report…… and I did not fucking drown !

TWO PIECE HEAT SHIELD SET FOR 3-INCH DRESSER MUFFLERS–Samson announces new chrome Heat Shield to fit their Silver Bullet mufflers for dressers and Road Kings. It also has universal application and will fit all 3-inch mufflers.

6th WIFE SEARCHING FOR BANDIT–Hi, my name is Lena Fairless. My dad ownes Strokers of Dallas. I was looking for Bandit’s e-mail address. Iwas wondering if you knew it.

Thank you, XOXO
(Bandit’s 6th Wife!!)
Lena

RIVERA ENGINEERING, INC. ALL NEW DUAL CARB KITS FOR SPORTSTERS–1041-0023 Dual 42mm HSR Mikuni carburetor kit with polished carburetors, and polished Dual Runner Intake manifold. Fits all 1986-to present Evolution Sportster models.

1041-0024, Dual 42mm HSR Mikuni carburetor kit with polished carburetors, and CHROME Dual Runner Intake manifold. Fits all 1986-to present Evolution Sportster models.

Rivera Engineering, Inc.
12532 Lambert Road
Whittier, CA 90606
Tel: (562) 907-2600 Fax: (562) 907-2606

CRAZYHORSE REPORT–Ed Sherrer of old Virginia sent me photos of his completed bike with Crazy Horse paint. It was good news that I needed to hear. All is not serene in the Bortles household this week. The current raging debate concerns the BDL BeltDrive covers on the Crazy Horse gooseneck hardtail. Now I love the covers just as they are. They’re clean and sharp providing a neat cleaned up area at the bottom of the bike. Two perfect speres, one smaller than the other. Clean, clean, CLEAN dammit!!!!!!! But nnnnoooooo! The hillbilly bike builder can’t leave well enough alone. He’s out there right now, drawing circles and threatening to cut slots in them. YUK!

Great creeping lizards, I’m on the road for two weeks and come home to this. Desecration of my bike design! What’s next, him telling me that my chili is too spicy? That my chicken and dumplings are dumpy? If I give in to this, there may be no end in sight. I guess he got bored with polishing the carb while waiting for me to finish flaming the frame. I better get my ass in gear so he can start assembling that baby. He needs to leave that BDL alone. It’s perfect. Got that – husband? A man with too much time on his hands is a dangerous thing.

In other news, NASCAR Busch Grand national driver Mike McLaughlin is selling his custom built prostreet. This is one tightly constructed bike. You have to see this bike in person to believe it. Go to http://www.mike-mclaughlin.com to see the details.

Ok, I gotta get back to that frame.

—Crazy Horse

CALIFORNIA–Do you know what happened in 1850?

California became a state.Back then, the state had no electricity, no money,there were gun fights in the middle of the streets, andalmost everyone spoke Spanish.

So it was just like California today.Only back then the women had real boobs.

–from Bob T.

Motors at Rusty?s

BIKERNET AUSTRALIAN CONNECTION–Bandit, I came across a ?63 Pan for sale in ?Just Bikes?. It had a 12-inch over front end with a slightly raked rigid frame; I struck a deal with John the owner over the phone and drove about 1200 klms to pick it up. I hooked up with John and had a feed, and drank way to many Southern Comforts at a great little pub in a one horse town in northern N.S.W. Australia. Turns out, I knew John from a few years ago which made the deal so much better. Crashed at the pub and after a big breakfast, loaded the pan on the trailer then John and I headed our separate ways.

Got the bike home, promptly unloaded it and went for a ride. It rode great but had a few bugs to sort out before I could do some serious riding. I looked up Rusty of RUSTY?S BAYSIDE Custom Cycle?s in Cleveland, just outside Brisbane, Queensland. He?s a fully qualified factory mechanic, originally from Africa and opened his shop on our shores in 1988. He runs a one-man show specialising in customising and restorations and is ?Old School? with a Pan in a softail frame as his own ride.

Walking into his shop you?re met with a variety of bikes he?s working on, old and new Pan motors and the odd Knuckle motor sitting around. He had a couple of ?ground up? rebuilds on the go, one being a very low H.P.U. swing arm frame from Germany with an inverted front-end by Italian Stortz -Cerini with a H.P.U. front and rear wheel with a 250 tyre. On top of the frame sits a stretched Battistins fuel tank and directly under the tank a ?113inch? S&S Knuckle style motor. I?ll keep you posted on this rebuild and send more photos as the bike progresses. Rusty?s email address is rustyscustom@powerup.com.au and I?ll keep you updated on Pan

Ride safe,

Glenn – The Australian Connection.

SAMSON’S BIRTHDAY CRUISE–Dealernews is going to run this picture to cover our Birthday Cruise. Tom from Dealernews wanted me to ID the people with Kenny, so do you want to be Bandit, Keith, K. Randall??? How about Layla?

Loved your article about Dave Hanlon. Can I put it on our www.superxowners.com website?

Nick Trumbo
Sales and Marketing Manager
Samson Motorcycle Products

Continued On Page 4

BIKERNET NEWS ALERT–HARLEY DOUBLES DIVIDENDS, CHILD SUPPORT WARNINGS AND FLORIDA TOY RUN

Continued From Page 1

Katie Treschl of Melbourne participates in the Brevard County chapter of ABATE of Florida Inc.’s 22nd annual toy run on Sunday. Thousands paraded with donations of toys, games and stuffed animals. Image 2003, Delinda Karnehm, FLORIDA TODAY

20,000 BIKERS ROAR THROUGH BREVARD– MELBOURNE, FLORIDA — Many children opening gifts this Christmas would be surprised to know the Hokey Pokey Elmo twisting away in front of them was once strapped to a motorcycle, with its red hair blowing in the wind and cruising down the highway.

But that could be the case since the orange-nosed doll and other stuffed animals were brought in Sunday by thousands of motorcycle-riding supporters of a toy drive aimed at helping needy children this holiday season.

“See this truck,” said Jerry Keyes, the organizer of this year’s Brevard chapter of the American Bikers Aimed Toward Education.

“It’s a 26-footer and it’s full right now . . . we’re running out of room,” said Keyes, standing at a long line of tables set up to take toys from bikers rolling in from across the state and the country.

Organizers estimated at least 20,000 bikers rumbled their way from Merritt Island to the Wickham Park Pavilion at the Brevard Community College campus in Melbourne.

The procession along U.S. 1 lasted more than an hour. The roadway was closed off in different areas as the bikers moved on, delaying some motorists who were not allowed onto U.S. 1 until the bikers passed.

Once at Park Pavilion, the bikers, many decked out in Santa-caps and leather, walked shoulder to shoulder amid booths selling everything from leather chaps to grilled Italian sausages slathered with saut?ed onions and peppers.

“You got my e-mail?” asked Clarence “Fuzzy Red” Dunkle, dressed as Santa Claus. He was talking to a woman wanting to know about how to get a toy donated to a child.

“E-mail me a name, address and the amount of kids . . . that’s my area,” the Titusville resident said to the woman after a quick hug. His naturally red beard was temporarily spray painted white.

“I’ve been doing this for 8 or 9 years . . . they love it,” Dunkle said of the curious children who often stopped and stared at his beard and red outfit.

And just as there was no mistaking Dunkle as Santa, there was little guessing as to who 44-year-old Bonnie Sutor was hoping to portray, albeit in a naughty fashion.

“I think this is all a great idea for the kids,” said Sutor, dressed in a red Santa hat, a matching white-fur trimmed bikini top and mini-skirt along with thigh-high black leather boots.

“We brought in toys . . . all stuffed,” said the Port St. John resident, carrying two cups of beer and walking with her more traditionally dressed bike-enthusiast husband Ron Sutor.

On the tables, near the entrance where the parking lots quickly turned into a sea of every kind of motorcycle, were volunteers stuffing donated toys into bags and packing them into waiting trucks.

From there the toys — from Hokey Pokey Elmo to Tonka trucks — would be distributed to families for children who otherwise would get few, if any toys to mark Christmas.

The initial toy run organized by Keyes in 1982 drew just 35 bikers.

By J.D. Gallop,FLORIDA TODAY

–Rogue

Old Photo By Bob T.

THANKS TO BIKERNET–I just wanted to take a minute to thank you for such a great website.After being taken out on the 91 freeway last February I was laid up formore than six months. A couple of months in the hospital and the rest ofthe time I was laid up at home. During that entire time I think I readjust about everything that you have ever posted on the regular site plusthe Cantina site.

I’m sure you get these kinds of messages all the time but I really meanit when I say thanks.

–Harley Jacobs

V-TWIN EXPO COMING IN FEBRUARY–Production work on AMD?s January edition finishes this week, which means that the sands of time are already trickling for the February number which will preview the V-Twin Expo at Cincinnati.With over 300 firms already confirmed as exhibitors, space availability both in editorial as well as advertising terms, is definitely going to be spoken for quickly.We are hoping to have this edition of AMD finished by Christmas for Early January print and mailing?so act now to avoid disappointment.American Motorcycle Dealer is sent to more named V-twin industry professionals and businesses than any other edition of any other trade journal published by anyone, anywhere… FACT!

Ben Bradley
Publishing Assistant
American Motorcycle Dealer
http://www.dealer-world.com

MERRY CHRISTMAS FROM HARLEY THEY DOUBLED QUARTERLY DIVIDEND– Milwaukee, Wis., December 5, 2003 — Harley-Davidson, Inc. (NYSE: HDI) announced today that its Board of Directors approved a quarterly cash dividend of 8 cents per share, payable December 29, 2003 to shareholders of record as of December 15, 2003. This represents a 100 percent increase over the last quarterly dividend.

“The recent change in tax law has increased the attractiveness of dividends as a way of sharing the success of the Company with our shareholders,” said Jeffrey L. Bleustein, chairman and chief executive officer of Harley-Davidson, Inc.

The Company currently has approximately 302 million shares of common stock outstanding.

CHILD SUPPORT CONFESSIONS–The following are all replies that women have put on British Child SupportAgency forms in the section for listing father’s details: These are genuineexcerpts from the forms (names removed).

1. Regarding the identity of the father of my twins, child A was fatheredby [name removed]. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of child B,but I believe that he was conceived on the same night.

2. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of my child as I was beingsick out of a window when taken unexpectedly from behind. I can provide youwith a list of names of men that I think were at the party if this helps.

3. I do not know the name of the father of my little girl. She wasconceived at a party [address and date given] where I had unprotected sexwith a man I met that night. I do remember that the sex was so good that Ifainted. If you do manage to track down the father can you send me hisphone number? Thanks.

4. I don’t know the identity of the father of my daughter. He drives a BMWthat now has a hole made by my stiletto in one of the door panels. Perhapsyou can contact BMW service stations in this area and see if he’s had itreplaced.

5. I have never had sex with a man. I am awaiting a letter from the Popeconfirming that my son’s conception was immaculate and that he is Christrisen again.

6. I cannot tell you the name of child A’s dad as he informs me that to doso would blow his cover and that would have cataclysmic implications forthe British economy. I am torn between doing right by you and right by thecountry. Please advise.

7. I do not know who the father of my child was as all squaddies look thesame to me. I can confirm that he was a Royal Green Jacket.

8. [name given] is the father of child A. If you do catch up with him canyou ask him what he did with my AC/DC CDs?

9. From the dates it seems that my daughter was conceived at EuroDisneymaybe it really is the Magic Kingdom.

10. So much about that night is a blur. The only thing that I remember forsure is Delia Smith did a programme about eggs earlier in the evening. IfI’d have stayed in and watched more TV rather than going to the party at(address given), mine might have remained unfertilised.

–from Chris T.

Glenn, Peter & Kay

MORE FROM THE AUZZIE CONNECTION–HI! Guys, After picking up the bikes in Glendale, our first stop on our trip to Sturgis was Big Sur, where we camped along with 300 other Auzzies that we had the pleasure of meeting.

Peter & Kay have been on the road since 1996 Traveling the world, visiting over 120 countries and riding more than 300,000 klms on a 1994 Ultra Classic. I couldn’t believe my eyes when I saw their bike in Noosa Heads, Australia. A quick scout around and I found them strolling along the river taking in the views. A quick chat, organized a time to meet, get a couple shots and then have a couple of beers.

What followed was a great night, Kerry and a couple of friends joined us for a meal and a few more drinks. Peter & Kay are very interesting people, I could not get enough of their traveling tales. They were on their way home to Townsville to spend Xmas with friends and family. I need to take more notes, because I can’t remember what country they were off to next year. You can jump on their web site http://www.HorizensUnlimited.com.au and follow their travels.

Take it easy .

The Auzzie Connection.

Continued On Page 3

BIKERNET NEWS–HOT CHRISTMAS ACTION

It’s Thursday in the eye of the Christmas Season storm. We need to stay calm during this harried time, but I’m teetering. We’re working on a real estate deal to expand the vast Bikernet empire, but it may be crumbling due to a cop. We’ve torn the Amazing Shrunken FXR apart. Sheet metal is now in Harold Pontarelli’s capable hands. Powder coating will leave for Custom Powder Coating in Dallas next week, and chrome will be delivered to Wilmington in SoCal. Why the hell did I pick this month to finish this bike? Shows in January.

All the Orwell Book orders will fly out today, Christmas Cards will terrorize the Post Office by the end of the week. Shirt orders picked up today and shipped tomorrow. Sin Wu is doing a helluva job while the blond is strapped to her bed. We’re avoiding her. It may be the flu.

That’s just the beginning of the list. Let’s dive into the news:

BUCK LOVELL PHOTOGRAPHY–Would this make a bang bang poster?

Buck
buck@riveraengineering.com

Shortly Buck’s Panhead print will be listed in the Gulch.–Bandit

BIKERS’ RIGHTS–Bandit, Thanks for giving me My Shot. You’re absolutely right about bikers’ rights and protections under the law for motorcyclists. Since when does, “I didn’t see him” become an excuse in court for killing or maiming someone??? Under the law, never.

Reminds me of a joke I heard a while back about Texas law. A guy kills his wife. Gets off because his excuse was, “She needed killin’. ” One thing I wish my fellow bikers would do as you say. Write the people that can make a difference. Writing each other in biker pubs and snivelling about wrongs done to us only gets sympathy, but not much else….

Ride safe.
–Steve Thomas
netnoggin@sbcglobal.net

JANKLOW DOWN–Jury Convicts U.S. Rep. Janklow of Manslaughter, Reuters NewsSummary: FLANDREAU, S.D. (Reuters) – A South Dakota jury convicted Republican U.S. Rep. Bill Janklow of manslaughter and other charges for speeding through a highway stop sign and colliding fatally with a motorcyclist. Janklow, 64, could face a 10-year prison term on the manslaughter charge and possible expulsion from the House of Representatives at sentencing.

Comments: There might just be justice in this world after all.

–fromTom Conley

STEALTH TOY RUN REPORT–Here is a report with pictures from the toy run held here in Charlotte, North Carolina, and I emphasize North Carolina, held this past Sunday.

This past Sunday the Concerned Bikers Association of Charlotte, North Carolina held it annual Toys For Tots toy run. The morning greeted everyone with frosty tempartures in high 20’s to 30 degrees. The riders began staging for the run at 12 noon at the Independence Arena. By 1 p.m. over 500 riders pulled out and headed for Freedom Park to fill up the Marine Corp’s trucks with all the toys. The temperature climbed to around 55 degrees and the sun was bright. A little early morning cold didn’t stop the bikers from showing up to brighten Christmas for the kids.

After the run Harley-Davidson of Charlotte hosted their annual Christmas party and sale. There was plenty of food on hand for the riders when they arrived. This day is a day that the bikers of Charlotte have come to look forward to. It is a day when the dealership and riders come together to make a great day for everyone involved.

At the end of the day a lot of good had been done and there was something for everyone. Most of all, this day once again proved that bikers have the biggest hearts when it comes to helping out those less fortunate than ourselves, especially when kids are involved.

Oh before I forget, thanks to “THE MEANEST” for the pictures, you did a great job!

Later!
The Stealth

AIN’T A BIKE IN A BARN, BUT–NewsMax.com has obtained exclusive photos of a buried Iraqi jet fighter being recovered byU.S. Air Force troops. The Iraqi jet, an advanced Russian MiG-25 Foxbat, was found buried in the sand after an informant tipped off U.S. troops.

The MiG was dug out of a massive sand dune near the Al Taqqadum airfield by U.S. Air Force recovery teams. The MiG was reportedly one of over two dozen Iraqi jets buried in the sand, like hidden treasure, waiting to be recovered at a later date.

Contrary to what some in the major media have reported, not all the jets found were from the Gulf War era.

The Russian-made MiG-25 Foxbat being recovered by U.S. Air Force troops in the photos is an advanced reconnaissance version never before seen in the West and is equipped withsophisticated electronic warfare devices.

U.S. Air Force recovery teams had to use large earth-moving equipment to uncover the MiG, which is over 70 feet long and weighs nearly 25 tons.

The Foxbat is known to be one of Iraq’s top jet fighters. The advanced electronic reconnaissance version found by the U.S. Air Force is currently in service with the Russian air force. The MiG is capable of flying at speeds of over 2,000 miles an hour, or three times the speed of sound, and at altitudes of over 75,000 feet.

The recovery of the advanced MiG fighter is considered to be an intelligence coup by the U.S. Air Force. The Foxbat may also be equipped with advanced Russian- and French-made electronics that were sold to Iraq during the 1990s in violation of a U.N. ban on arms sales to Baghdad.

The buried aircraft at Al Taqqadum were covered in camouflage netting, sealed and, in many cases, had their wings removed before being buried more than 10 feet beneath the Iraqi desert.

Top U.S. weapons inspector Dr. David Kay is known to favor human intelligence as the primary means to find Iraq’s hidden treasure trove of weapons and secrets.

While there are rumors of Iraqi chemical and biological weapons being shipped to nearby Syria, the weapons may very well still remain inside Iraq buried under the vast desert wastelands.

–from Rogue

BIKERNET RELLIGIOUS MOMEMNT– Mother Superior calls all the nuns together. She then says to them, “I must tell you something very serious. We have a case of gonorrhea in the convent.”

A blonde nun in the back responds, “Thank God … I’m so tired of Zinfandel !!”

–from Chris T.

RIGHT OF WAY LAWS–A MUST FOR BIKER SAFETY–The following articles concern the nationally covered court caseinvolvingSouth Dakota U.S.Representative William Janklow. Please forgive someofthe seemingly repetitious information. The reason the motorcyclingcommunity is followin’ this case so closely, is due to the nationalpushby the State Motorcycle Rights Organizations (SMRO’s), the MRF,AIM/NCOM& the American Motorcyclist Association (AMA) Government Relations toenact Right-of-Way laws.

These laws will hold the cage-drivers accountable when theirinattentionbehind the wheel causes accidents resultin’ in personal injury, damageto &/or loss of property &/or death of motorcyclists. ABATE of MD,Inc.introduced our Right of Way bill in last year’s legislative session. Itdidn’t pass. As Pappy Boward stated in the latest State Newsletter,we’ll be submittin’ it each year until it DOES!

How many friends have YOU lost from these type of “accidents”? Howmanyfolks you know are maimed?…..Wrecked &/or lost their bikes?…..&theage-old excuse to the officer at the scene:”…Uhh….I didn’t see the motorcycle…”

And then…..they get the proverbial slap-on-the-wrist $50.00 fine bythe court system.

The accountability we’re pushin’ for WILL increase motorcycle awarnessA-N-D save lives, folks.

–In Service, Prezzz

ELDERLY DRIVER COLLIDES WITH MOTORCYCLE– for the second time in two yearsNov. 6 – An elderly Ohio man who caused the death of a motorcyclistin atraffic accident two years ago has been indicted in another motorcyclecrash that cost a woman her leg.

Everett Hargrove, 75, of the Toledo area was indicted recently fornegligent assault in a September 9 crash in which Hargrove’s vehiclecollided with a motorcycle ridden by Nancy Hejl, 40. Hejl lost a legasa result of the crash.Hargrove allegedly pulled out of a driveway into Hehjl’s path. Hefacesup to 60 days in jail if convicted.

In August of 2001, Hargrove pulled out of a driveway and his vehiclecollided with a motorcycle, killing rider Daniel Gfell of Toledo.Hargrove was convicted of vehicular homicide and received a suspended10-day jail term as well as a three-month drivers license suspension.

–from Rogue

Continued On Page 2

BIKERNET NEWS FLASH–MUSCLE BIKE FRAME REVEALED, RON COVELL METAL WORKSHOPS AND SWEDISH SPORTSTER FRAME

Continued From Page 2

MOTORCYCLE JOURNEYS THROUGH NEW ENGLAND–Enjoy some of the finest motorcycling in America with a veteran two-wheeled traveler from the region as your guide. From Maine?s rugged Atlantic coast to the high notches of the White Mountains of New Hampshire, over the rolling farmlands and lush gaps of Vermont, and on to the lakes region of New York, south through the rolling Berkshire hills of Massachusetts and along the south coast of Connecticut and Rhode Island, New England captivates its visitors with a variety of terrain and rich heritage unsurpassed in the United States.

This latest edition of Berke’s popular book offers 25 carefully-plotted routes, detailed maps and specific route directions, with most of the trips taking one day to complete. Each trip is designed to accommodate various riding styles and audiences, from two-up sightseeing travelers to sport riders chasing the curves. Among these trips are favorite roads like Vermont?s Route 100, the Lake George area near the New York-Vermont border (site of the Americade rally), and the Kancamagus Highway in New Hampshire.

From Maine’s rugged coast to the mountain passes of New Hampshire, over the rolling farmlands of Vermont to the pristine lakes of upstate New York, south to the Berkshire hills and on to seaside fun in Connecticut and Rhode Island, New England captivates its visitors with unsurpassed riding opportunities and a rich cultural heritage that always fascinates.

Two-wheeled veteran and author, Marty Berke, is your guide as he offers 25 carefully-plotted routes with detailed maps and specific route directions, each taking about one day to complete. Berke’s recommendations for unique restaurants, diners, roadhouses, places to stay, and interesting attractions to visit often lead to the off-beat-and always to spots off the beaten path. Favorite roads like Vermont’s Route 100, the Kancamagus Highway or the Mount Washington Auto Road in New Hampshire, and the “Height-of-Land” ridge road in central Maine are included, as well as little-known riding treasures like Wilmington Notch in the Adirondacks or Evans Notch on the Maine/New Hampshire border. The trips are designed to accommodate various riding styles from two-up sightseers to sport riders chasing the curves.

Whether you want to extend a fun trip to the annual rallies such as Americade in Lake George, New York or Bike Week at Laconia, New Hampshire, or hope to discover new adventures, this book offers a full banquet of choices. There?s plenty here to suit your own time, budget, and interests.

For more info, call Whitehorse Press at 800-531-1133 or log on to http://www.whitehorsepress.com

SWEDISH SPORT FROM PAUGHCO–Paughco’s latest addition to the world’s largest line of custom and replacement frames for Harley-Davidson motorcycles comes in the form of this stretched RIGID SWEDISH SPORTSTER. The follow-up to their hugely popular Swedish chassis for Big Twins, feature 3″ stretch in the backbone and a full 6″ in the legs. The SWEDISH SPORT is designed to fit `86 to present Sportsters, can be ordered with 30, 35 or 40 degree rake, and is fit with stock style neck and no tabs.

This particular model accepts 130 rubber but a “wide” model is on the way. For complete details on this and the complete line of Paughco frames, springers, exhaust systems and more call 775-246-5738. On the Web at www.paughco.com

SNITCHES ATTACK HELLS ANGELS–Federal agents raided Hells Angels motorcycle club hangouts across the West on Wednesday and made 38 arrests, including nine in Washington and Alaska, after a two-year undercover investigation into alleged violations of gun and drug laws.

All 38 people arrested were either members or associates of the Hells Angels, according to Patrick Berarducci, senior special agent for the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives (search) in Los Angeles.

Agents arrested five people in Washington state at homes in Tacoma, Kirkland, Silverdale, Spokane and Wenatchee, said ATF spokeswoman Vera Fedorak in Seattle. Four arrests were made in Alaska, at three homes in Anchorage and one in Two Rivers.

Agents also searched three clubhouses in Washington and Alaska — on Sprague Street in Spokane, and in Anchorage and North Pole, Alaska — but made no arrests there.

The raids came before dawn, and the arrests were for drug trafficking, weapons charges, possession of stolen explosives and other crimes, Fedorak said.

The San Francisco headquarters of the Hells Angels was targeted, and other search and arrest warrants were executed in Southern California, Arizona, Nevada and Alaska.

The Northern California warrants resulted in 16 or 17 arrests, said Marti McKee, a bureau spokeswoman in San Francisco. She declined to say what agents were looking for, saying the supporting documents were sealed by court order.

Targets in Northern California included 29 search warrants and 24 arrest warrants in locations that included Richmond, San Jose and Santa Cruz County.

“San Francisco police did the entry and secured the scene,” she said of the Hells Angels raid. “Now that they’ve taken care of that, ATF agents are going in to search.”

–from Rogue

SCREAMIN’ EAGLE DRAG TEAM POURS ON POWER IN POMONA–Tonglet and Hines Qualify For NHRA Pro Stock Finals, End Season Top-10 In Points. The Screamin’ Eagle/Vance & Hines team qualified both riders for the Pro Stock Bike elimination rounds of the 39th Annual Automobile Club of Southern California NHRA Finals, Nov. 7-9 at Pomona Raceway in Pomona, Calif. The event was the final round of the 2003 National Hot Rod Association POWERade Drag Racing Series.

Screamin’ Eagle/Vance & Hines rider Andrew Hines was fourth quickest in the 16-rider field with a qualifying run of 7.136 seconds at 189.15 mph aboard his Screamin’ Eagle V-Rod. GT Tonglet rode his Screamin’ Eagle V-Rod into the elimination rounds with a qualifying run of 7.164/191.81, good for sixth position. Craig Treble was the top qualifier with a run of 7.075/192.47, a new track ET record for the class.

Both riders advanced through the first elimination round on Sunday. Tonglet won his race when Shawn Gann drew a red light for jumping the start. Hines (7.210/182.21) defeated Antron Brown (7.259/179.56). In the second round, Tonglet jumped the start by just -0.005 second to hand the race to Angelle Savoie on a red light. Hines (7.333/174.96) had an outstanding reaction time of just 0.003 second for a great start but lost to Mike Berry (7.210/182.21) when a transmission problem caused his bike to shift from second to fourth gear. Treble (7.129/184.07) won the event when Savoie jumped the start for a red light (-0.013) in the final round.

The Pomona event wraps up an exciting second season of Pro Stock Bike competition for the Screamin’ Eagle/Vance & Hines team that saw Hines and Tonglet qualify for the elimination rounds at each of 15 Pro Stock Bike events on the NHRA POWERade Drag Racing Series, running consistently in the upper half of the field throughout the season.

The 2004 NHRA POWERade Pro Stock Bike season kicks off with the 35th Annual Mac Tool Gatornationals in Gainesville, Fla. on March 18-21, 2004.

shot from Rev CarlR

ODD NEWS: DAIMLERCHRYSLER TO SPONSOR LINGERIE BOWL– DaimlerChrysler AG’s sponsorship of a Super Bowl halftime football game between lingerie-clad women could draw criticism, say experts. But the Lingerie Bowl is a marketing risk the automaker, which has become known for its sexually-suggestive ads, says it’s willing to take.

For 20 minutes during the Super Bowl on Feb. 1, 14 models dressed in lingerie will participate in a tackle football game. The program will be broadcast live on a pay-per-view channel for an estimated $20 to $30 viewing fee.

James Kenyon, a spokesman for the Auburn Hills-based Chrysler Group, said “it’s another way for us to break through the advertising clutter” during the Super Bowl.

The company will use the Lingerie Bowl to pitch Dodge cars and trucks bought primarily by men, Kenyon told the Detroit Free Press for a Thursday story. But some experts say viewers may get the wrong message.

“This is horrendous,” said John Antil, professor of marketing at the University of Delaware.

“It is blatantly chauvinistic. You have the potential of offending a significant amount of people and what is the message? I am going to think the car is sexy or it makes me look more macho. It’s a boneheaded move.”

But Kenyon says Dodge isn’t trying to please everyone. The brand tends to attract male buyers, so risque programming is appropriate, he said.

Associated Press

–from Rogue

RON COVELL METALWORKING WORKSHOPS–Ron Covell is starting his 11th year giving metalworkingworkshops, and he’ll be traveling to 13 states this year. Thousands of people nationwide have learned how to shape and repair sheet metal with simple hand tools, and in most workshops, Ron demonstrates the use of the English Wheel. The workshops are open to people at all levels of experience, and sharing of individual experience is an important part of the workshop.

For more information contact Covell Creative Metalworking, 106 Airport Blvd #105, Freedom, CA 95019 800 747-4631, or 831 768-0705 Visit the website for the workshops schedules. http://www.covell.biz

STEED’S NEW MUSCLE-BIKE FRAME–Attached are a couple of photos that I just took of the first new 300Monoglide chassis. I’ve been working simultaneously on this chassis, fromthe information that Leo has been supplying me, so I hope we’re close withall our dimensions.

We’re going to do a promotion with the new chassis, in conjunction with the1991 NHRA top fuel funny car champion, Jim White. Jim has been one of ourcustomers for quite some time now, and he was the first guy to do 300 MPH ina funny car. So we’re going to work his 300 milestone along with hisendorsement of our new 300 Steed bikes.

Please check out this linkfor more information on our 200/300 Steed Monoglide platform.http://www.surgicalsteeds.com/surgicalsteeds.com_section2/section2.html

John Covington
john@surgicalsteeds.com
Steed Musclebike
www.musclebikes.com
9550 North 90th Street
Scottsdale, AZ 85258
480 661-1990 phone
877 4-STEEDS toll free

That’s All Folks–I’m escaping to Mexico soon. Maybe the women south of the border will talk to me. Did ya notice that there’s not babes in the news? I’m bummed. Should be an interesting ride, though.

Tomorrow Sin Wu and I have a to-do list a mile long, Christmas shopping hell, the Bikernet way. We only give custom gifts. No malls for us. I’ll ship out the Sheet metal for the Amazing Shrunken FXR and what else?

We’ve received several orders for custom embroidered shirts. We’ll deliver them to the sewing elf tomorrow. Many thanks to George Lamb for the Tullamore Dew, Irish Whiskey. Arrived just in time to celebrate the Thursday news. I’m outta Jack.

Have a helluva weekend. Avoid the feds and Christmas shopping crowds. Don’t let holiday stress wear ya down and find a good woman to keep you warm this chilly season. Maybe even two.

Ride Forever,

–Bandit

BIKERNET NEWS ALERT–STURGIS MUSEUM, KNIEVEL JUMPS TODAY AND NEW BOOKS FROM WHITEHORSE PRESS

Continued From Page 1

WHITEHORSE PRESS CHRISTMAS GIFT SELECTIONS– THE ART OF THE CHOPPER by Tom Zimberoff. A new and stunning collection of the ultra-exotic, ultra-sexy customs created by today’s hottest builders – people like Billy Lane, Dave Perowitz, and Jesse James. 256 pages, 10 1/2″ x 12″ hardcover, gorgeous color photographs, $39.95

http://www.whitehorsepress.com/email.asp?cn=52&en=en0310&id=artc

Sonny Barger, author.

SHE’S A BAD MOTORCYCLE: WRITERS ON RIDING, by Gino Zanetti. A tasty sampling of the best motorcycle writing ever, from Hunter S. Thompson, Ted Simon, Ralph “Sonny” Barger, Robert Pirsig, Robert Fulton, Che Guevara, Peter Coyote, Dennis Hopper, and many others. “25 little appetizers . . . all good reading” –Rider magazine. 326 pages, softbound, $16.95

GHOST RIDER: TRAVELS ON THE HEALING ROAD, by Neil Peart, drummer for the rock band Rush. A triumphant travel memoir from a very gifted writer and musician, who took to the road as a man reduced to staying alive by staying on the move. 400 pages, softbound, $19.95

BIKERLADY: LIVING AND RIDING FREE, by Sasha Mullins. A testament to every woman who heads out on the highway of life taking control of her destiny and facing challenges at full throttle. Just published and perfect for the special lady in your life. 220 pages, softbound, $18.95

PURPLE MOUNTAINS: AMERICA FROM A MOTORCYCLE, by Notch Miyake. An exploration of America and its people that is adventurous in its scope. “A book that makes you think about the choices in your own life, good and bad” –Classic Bike Rider. 224 pages, softbound, $19.95

DETOURS: LIFE, DEATH, AND DIVORCE ON THE ROAD TO STURGIS by Richard La Plante. “A very good writer . . . the book is better entertainment than a month of Jesse James TV shows.” –American Rider magazine. 284 pages, hardcover, $24.95

LEANINGS, by Peter Egan. A distinctive and familiar voice reminds us all why we ride. Twenty-seven of Peter’s favorite columns from Cycle World magazine are reprinted in this book, showcasing his love of motorcycles, good friends, and the simple adventures of life. 160 pages, hardcover, $24.95

Order copies now in plenty of time for holiday gift giving. The only thing better than a good ride is a good read! WhitehorsePress.com.

KERN COUNTY COP CARS–Finally, a Sheriff’s office that is not afraid of telling the truth. Hats off to Kern County, California. Gotta love it. We’ve all seen law enforcement cars and their mottos, like “Protect and Serve”, “Dedicated to our Safety” and such. Now someone finally comes forth with the truth.

–from Bob T.

ROGUE’S BAD COP REPORT– Molesting Cop resigns and pleads guilty Washington – Former Kitsap County Sheriff’s Deputy Michael Kleinfelder pleaded guilty Monday to one count of third-degree child molestation – a felony – for having sex with his 13-year-old baby-sitter three years ago.

Kleinfelder will have to register as a sex offender and could get six to 12 months in jail or on electronic home surveillance, Deputy Prosecutor Tim Drury said.

Kleinfelder will be sentenced Jan. 9.

The baby-sitter’s family said they were glad to have the incident behind them, but were upset that Kleinfelder might not go to jail for the crime.

“If this would have been a school teacher or a basketball coach, he (Kleinfelder) would have been in jail by now,” the victim’s father said.

Family members’ names are being withheld by The Sun to protect the victim’s identity.

Bad Cop… No Doughnut!

–from Rogue

JANKLOW LIED, SAID HE SWERVED TO MISS A WHITE CAR– Two Highway Patrol troopers testified today that U.S. Rep. Bill Janklow said he swerved to miss a white car, then “gunned it” to get past the car before colliding with a motorcycle in the intersection of two Moody County roads on Aug 16.

“He stated that as he was coming south, coming to the intersection, a white car had come from the east, turned north and crossed over in front of him,” said Trooper Jeff Lanning.

Trooper Josh Olson had testified earlier that Janklow “said he had to goose it to get by him.”

Court has dismissed for the day. The prosecution will resume it’s case Wednesday.

During Lanning’s testimony, prosecutors showed a lengthy videotape taken in the trooper’s squad car as he drove Janklow to the hospital in Flandreau to draw blood, then back to the crash site.

During the drive, Lanning asked Janklow if he was driving fast at the time of the accident.

“I wasn’t speeding,” Janklow said on the tape. “There wasn’t any reason to be in a hurry. Maybe 65.”

Staff Reports
Argus Leader

–from Rogue

KAPTAIN ROBBIE KNIEVEL JUMPS TODAY– I thought you might be interested in covering Kaptain Robbie Knievel’s next jump this Thursday, December 4th at Irwindale Speedway. Daredevil Kaptain Robbie Knievel Makes a “Clean” Jump Over 10,000 Dishes at Irwindale Speedway. Daredevil stunts and jumps over the Grand Canyon, moving trains and planes are everyday “chores” for Kaptain Robbie Knievel. On December 4th, Kaptain Robbie Knievel will attempt a jump that has never been done before at Irwindale Speedway … and it’s one that involves more than 10,000 dishes – equaling the length of 25 football fields, if laid end-to-end.

Why jump over dishes and not trucks or canyons? Dawn dishwashing liquid presented Kaptain Robbie Knievel with a unique jump opportunity, to jump over all the dishes – 10,000 in all! – that can be washed with just one 25-oz. bottle. The brand suggested the high flying stunt to see if America’s greatest motorcross daredevil can go as far as one bottle of Dawn.

More than 1,500 Californians are expected to chow down on breakfast. They will then surrender their dirty dishes to a dish washing crew of 300. The “Dawn Dishwashing Crew” will wash and dry more than 10,000 dishes in 20 booths, which will be then be sorted into dish racks spanning a 150-foot-long raised platform – if each dish is laid out (end to end), the length is equivalent to 25 football fields or 27 big cars.

We’ll report on the Jump next week.

Old shot from Bob T.

BIKERNET FACTORY WORKERS– Two factory workers were talking. I think I’ll take some time off from work.” said the man.

“How do you think you’ll do that?” said the blonde.

He proceeded to show her…by climbing up to the rafters, and hanging upside down.

The boss walked in, saw the worker hanging from the ceiling, and asked him what on earth he was doing?

“I’m a light bulb” answered the guy.

“I think you need some time off,” said the boss.

So, the man jumped down and walked out of the factory. The blonde began walking out too.

The boss asked her where did she think she was going?

The blonde answered, “Home, I can’t work in the dark.”

–Red Horse

EXCELSIOR HENDERSON EXHIBIT OPENS AT THE PEOPLE’S MUSEUM– The Sturgis Motorcycle Museum & Hall of Fame is pleased to announce its most recent exhibit is now open for public viewing. The new Excelsior Henderson exhibit features three pristine Excelsiors, a 1905, 1909 and a 1914 Board track Racer, a four cylinder Henderson engine, as well as photographs and memorabilia. See www.SturgisMuseum.com

“Swift Motorcycle Company in Phoenix was kind enough to loan us this amazing exhibit,” stated Pepper Massey-Swan, the Museum’s Executive Director. The images document the history of both companies, giving visitors a peek inside an era long past.

“This is the perfect example of why we’ve become known as “The People’s Museum”, Massey-Swan continued. “Everything we have, all of our motorcycles, all of the photos and memorabilia are on loan. Much of our funding comes from individuals and corporations that believe in our mission and support us. We literally do exist because of the generosity of others.”

Continued On Page 3

BIKERNET NEWS FLASH–JANKLOW TRIAL BEGINS, CHRISTMAS PRESENT REMINDERS, DEEP CUT ROTORS AND NO DISCOUNTS!

Today’s nuts and I can’t talk about it. I don’t want to jinx a deal. We’re perched on the edge of our seats. I can announce that Bikernet has a new sponsor, BigBoar Products. Watch for news and info on their line shortly.

The Amazing Shrunken FXR is going to paint, by Harold Ponteralli of H-D Performance, tomorrow. Watch this puppy shine for the Roadster Show in Pomona at the end of January. Let’s jump into the news, before I loose track:

TRUE-TRACK IS ALIVE AND WELL–Happy Holidays. Attached is the new version of TRUE-TRACK suspension stablization device for baggers. Redesigned with standoffs now connected.

Some people were under the impression the base cage was a plate with five tubes and therefore weak(actually machined from an 11-pound billet and one piece). Not true, tested in that configuration at 1,100 lbs.The new configuration gives piece of mind in the apperance of strength yet it still anchors the swing arm pivot for TRUE-TRACKING.

I’ve received a lot of inquiries from Bikernet enthusiast as well as at least a buyer a week for TRUE-TRACK!

RIDE SAFE
Wil
tracktrue@netscape.net

Click for more information.

BIKERNET GULCH “ORWELL” CHRISTMAS OFFER–With only 20-days left till Christmas, we decided to make it easy on gift giving for you. We’ve knocked $4 bucks off the price of Orwell when you buy a minimum of five books. That’s right, for $55 dollars, shipping included, you’ll have gifts for five of your best buddies. Make it easy on yourself and buy the damn books!

Old shot from Bob T.

BIKERNET SPONSORS THE SMOKE-OUT–Smoke Out 2004 will be attended by the Bikernet.com staff member and we’ll even throw up a booth and have some products to sell. Watch for info on the June event in South Carolina.

LIFE STARTS AT THE EDGE–If you’re ready to embark on an exciting adventure into the two-wheeled world, look no further. Rider’s Edge is Harley-Davidson’s Academy of Motorcycling.Combining the proven curriculum of the Motorcycle Safety Foundation and the excitement and passion of Harley-Davidson, the Rider’s Edge New Rider Course offers unrivaled hands-on instruction that will bring your motorcycling dreams to life and give you the skills and confidence you need to get the most out of riding. THE NEW RIDER COURSE

The Rider’s Edge New Rider Course is a mixture of classroom time and actual riding that delivers the basics of motorcycle operation in Harley-Davidson style. It’s taught by experts certified by both the Motorcycle Safety Foundation (MSF) and Harley-Davidson to provide topnotch instruction in a relaxed, fun environment. After passing a written test and a riding skills evaluation, you’ll receive a MSF RiderCourse? Completion Card that ? depending on your state ? may exempt you from the written and/or riding skills portion of the motorcycle operator’s license test. The card may also qualify you for discounts on motorcycle insurance, depending on the provider. More than that, you’ll start a journey that will last a lifetime.

SCHEDULE

The course is conducted over 4 days from Thursday to Sunday. All sessions are mandatory, so make sure the course will work with your schedule. Times are as follows:

*Thursday & Friday: 5:00pm – 8:30pm
*Saturday & Sunday: 8:00am – 5:30pm

“Wild Fire Harley-Davidson”

KILLER JANKLOW INTERVIEWED–Just watched the Today Show. They were interviewing a friend of Rep.Bill Janklow ,(R) South Dakota. Y’all know, he’s the guy who killedRandy Scott, a Biker who had the misfortune of meeting Janklow at anintersection. Anyway, It seemed to me that Janklow, the anchor from NBC,and Janklow’s friend were pretty much trivializing the life that wastaken from a family and freinds who will miss Randy forever. They spentthe whole interview talking about what a great guy Janklow is and howhard this whole ordeal has been on him!!!!

This F#*Kin’ PISSES ME OFF!!! KILL A BIKER – GO TO JAIL!

Contact the show and let them know you were not happy with it and wouldlike the other side of the story aired: today@nbc.com. Remind them to check into Motorcycle Right-Of-Way legislation to save lives.

Joshua Lee Griffith
Cedar Falls, Ia.

INDIAN RECALLED MOTORCYCLES–(SafetyAlerts) – The National Highway Traffic Safety Administration (NHTSA) has released the following information.ON CERTAIN MOTORCYCLES, THE BRACKET USED TO SUPPORT THE TEARDROP HEADLIGHT CAN CRACK, CAUSING THE BRACKET TO BREAK AND THE LIGHT TO SLIP OUT OF POSITION OR FALL OFF.

THIS COULD CAUSE A LOSS OF VISIBILITY TO THE DRIVER, INCREASING THE RISK OF A CRASH.

DEALERS WILL INSTALL A NEW BRACKET. OWNER NOTIFICATION IS EXPECTED TO BEGIN DURING AUGUST 2003. OWNERS SHOULD CONTACT IMC AT 1-888-899-2997.

DEEP CUT ROTORS–At Deep Cut Rotors, all rotors are manufactured from 410 stainless steel, preventing rust, unusual wear and providing superior braking performance.

The rotors are cut with an Omega laser utilizing nitrogen gas, providing the ability to cut the most intricate of design patterns.

The rotors are then double-disc ground and heat treated to precise dimensions for flatness, perfect parallelism and micro finish, producing a thickness of .208 with a superior flatness tolerance of .001. The rotors are then polished to a mirror finish, brush finish or are available powder coated in a variety of colors for true custom applications.

All Deep Cut Rotors are available in 10″ and 11 1/2″ for early and late model wheels. Deep Cut Rotors have been tested extensively and meet the strict technical requirements and specifications with zero “Out of Balance” defects.

Deep Cut Rotors are compatible with virtually all brake pads on the market and produce normal brake pad wear. Also available custom matching linkage, sprockets and key chains.

Contact Ben at 303.934.4801 or sales@deepcutrotors.com .

THE BIKERNET STEALTH INVESTIGATION– One of the big questions I hear everyday and deal with everyday by just about every customer is “Do I get a discount?” The great discount controversy or myth or whatever you want to call it goes back to the begining days of the HOG club. At the time everyone thought that if you were a member, you automatically received a 10% discount at every H-D dealer. Wrong! Every dealer sets and has their own discount policy, so it is up to each dealer, since they are independently owned.

Another popular belief is that I bought my bike from you and I get a discount for the rest of my life! Wrong! Most dealers offer discounts on anything purchased on the day of sale of your bike. Again it is up to each dealer.

Way back in the ’70s when I started riding, you never walked into any shop and asked for a discount, much less demanded one. If you tried that you were probably shown the exit door, quick. I am sure a lot of us remember those days. Back then you went in, got what you needed and if a discount was afforded you, you appreciated it and thanked the guys. YOU DIDN’T EXPECT IT, because you purchased your bike there and thought they owed you something for the rest of your life!

Maybe some of you can help me understand this, a guy drops 20 grand for a new bike, a few weeks later walks in and buys, let’s say a $5 set of spark plugs. He is upset because he didn’t get that big 10% discount? A whole 50 cents? If you are that worried about that 50 cents, then you made a mistake buying a bike. As we all know a bikes don’t save you money!

The best response I ever heard to the GREAT DISCOUNT QUESTION was from a friend of mine, Lee Clemens the owner of Departure Bike Works. A guy comes in, asks for a discount, Lee says “When the grocery store and the utility companies give a discount, I will gladly pass it along to you!” Lee I hope you don’t mind me sharing that. All of us who work in this industry, contrary to popular belief, do it for more than just the fun of it. We do it for the same reason that you work, to make a living and pay our bills. Next time you expect your discount take a second to think about all the employees at the shop who work there to make a living.

I am not saying discounts are not warranted, if you are a regular customer and you are a loyal customer and it is offered to you, that’s cool. Next time, before you ask, think about your grocery store, your utility companies and your insurance companies. Do they give you a discount? I didn’t think so!

–The Stealth

Here’s Janklow’s bike from Bob T.

RECKLESS OR CONFUSED: JANKLOW JURY TO DECIDE–Congressman Bill Janklow was characterized Monday both as a reckless driver whose negligence killed an innocent motorcyclist and as a victim of diabetes who was tired, confused and not guilty of deliberately putting someone else’s life at risk.

Lawyers painted the opposing portraits of Janklow during opening arguments in the Moody County Courthouse, where the former South Dakota governor faces charges in the Aug. 16 death of Randy Scott.

“Randy Scott was killed that Saturday afternoon as the result of Bill Janklow blowing through that blind intersection at approximately 71 miles per hour,” assistant prosecutor Roger Ellyson told the jury.

Ellyson said the accident occurred “all because of the reckless disregard, all because of that important person driving that important-looking Cadillac.”

Janklow’s lawyer, Ed Evans of Sioux Falls, said the defense would show that the state was wrong about Janklow’s speed and intentions that day. Janklow had driven several hundred miles that weekend and had a medical condition that put him at risk for being low on blood sugar without any way of knowing the danger.

The second-degree man-slaughter charge he faces requires what Evans called the ridiculous belief that Janklow consciously decided to drive through a stop sign at an intersection with poor visibility.

“Only a fool or someone attempting to commit suicide … would do that,” Evans said.

The prosecution will begin calling witnesses at 9 a.m. today.

On Monday, the trial began in a crowded third-floor courtroom with as much discussion of Janklow’s health as his actions behind the wheel of the white Cadillac that collided with Scott’s Harley-Davidson at a rural intersection three miles east of Trent.

Jon Walker
Argusleader.com

–from Rogue

Continued On Page 2

BIKERNET HOLIDAY NEWS–CARIBBEAN CHEER AND NEW MUSTANGS

Continued From Page 2

BIKERNET CARIBBEAN REPORT–

Thanksgiving is around the corner, actually while you read this you will be stuffing your respective faces with turkey, jam and pumpkin pie.

Happy Thanksgiving to all!!

I just walked in the door, once more after taking a super quick trip to NYC to visit Indian Larry and get all the bikes in the shipping container heading towards Puerto Rico. As always it was good to be amongst friends, even if it was fucking freezing! I had a good time snooping around the shop, even got a gift from Paul Cox, a really cool set of twisted z-bars, yeah!

So the bikes are already on PR soil, I guess I’ll take a few rides before the guys show up – just kiddin’, but the event is becoming a reality. At the same time Hank Young, of Flying Pan fame was shipping everything from Jacksonville, we are still waiting on the confirmation of a few other friends. Just to let you know, the swell is 5-7 ft and picking up!

From there I flew directly to Miami to attend a Von Dutch party at the Sagamore Hotel. The recent opening of South Beach’s Von Dutch store was the occasion. My friends from Von Dutch Kustom bikes invited me over and all had a really good time. Let me tell you, I go to many places, but South Beach in season is something not to be missed, can you say Mega Babes galore!!!

After some time at the party I decided to sit down and just watch the chicks go by. I’m talking super primo talent! After going to some of the new hot spots in Miami and really knowing how sardines actually feel, we took off for the Deuce, my favorite dive in South beach, and I guess that a really good time was had by all, since we left around 4:00 am. But it was not over. Jamie called from the new bar she’s managing and I got my ass over there, Automatic Slims, what a cool place, they even had a stripper pole in a corner and the patrons (chicks) were going at it like there was no tomorrow. Lucky I got there that late since they were already liquored up and being foolish.

Shadowing all the girls, there where the three cutest bartenders on the Beach. I had some Von Dutch gear which I promptly bribed them with, ’till Laura, the cutest one of all told me a little secret, that she had never been on a chopper and was dying to…..So what do I do at 5:00 am? Go back to the hotel and try, with no fucking success to get one of the Von Dutch bikes and give Laura the ride she wanted. The sad part of the story is that everyone was already in the land of the dead. My pleas on the room doors went unanswered cause it was way too fucking late, or early, whichever you prefer to hot wire one of those fuckers…..I had to go back to the bar empty handed and with a lot of promises. There was no ride for either of us that night. Like Mac Arthur said, ?I shall return?.

We spent Saturday hanging around. Some of my friends that are readers of the Horse showed up on their choppers and we had lunch, shot the shit a bit, and many times tried to steal their bikes and look for you know who.

Well, I’m back home, same pace as always, going insane. I guess I just figured out yesterday that Thanksgiving is NOW, so instead of turkey I will be having a nice dinner of bolts, sheet metal and grease… Bikes to finish, things to do, the Puerto Rico Bike weekend is next week and as always, I’m way behind. So I guess I’ll stop now and go back to work……

By the way, I was told that my stories here and in the magazines were weak, feel free to let me know what you think.

Later

Jose – NY, Miami, Caribbean Bikernet reporter

GAMBLING ON BIKERNET–Two bored casino dealers are waiting at the crap table. A very attractiveblonde woman arrived and bet twenty thousand dollars ($20,000.00) on asingle roll of the dice. She said, “I hope you don’t mind, but I feel muchluckier when I’m completely nude.”

With that she stripped from the neck down, rolled the dice and yelled,”Come on, baby, Mama needs new clothes!”

As the dice came to a stop she jumped up and down and squealed. “YES! YES!I WON, I WON!”

She hugged each of the dealers and then picked up her winnings and herclothes and quickly departed.The dealers starred at each other dumfounded.

Finally, one of them asked, “What did she roll?”

The other answered, “I don’t know – I thought you were watching.”

MORAL: Not all blondes are dumb, but all men are men.

BUT I DIDN’T SEE THE MOTORCYCLE, OFFICER–These five little words are the summation that describes the most terrifying event most bikers will ever face. The specter of the car turning left in front of us as we travel at speed, with nowhere else to go but down. Sure there are all kinds of suggestions, you hear them in every biker bar in every city in the country; Crash jump! Turn the opposite way the car is turning! Lay the bike down! None, however, guarantees a safe escape from the uncaring, unaware, or preoccupied cage driver. Most of these terrifying meetings end with the biker stuck like a spear in the side of the cage, with the car driver uttering those five little words.

Check the homepage for info on perhaps the most life-saving legislation to come along. Mike Osborn has written the first report. Don’t miss it.

BIKERNET NORTH CAROLINA TECH EDITOR SWITCHES DEALERSHIPS– It’s Poncho (Pablo). Still alive and kickin in NC. Quit Charlotte H-D Oct 16th. Did Phoenix for a week. I “Rolled The Dice” and went to work for Blue Ridge H-D in Hickory, NC. Nuff said. So far so good.

They have the latest 250 “Pit” Dynojet Dyno. Brand new building 30,000 sq. ft. Service area is very high tech. Flow Bench is at the shop. Still lot’s of work to be done but tis the season to build again. Will continue tech’s

So your up to date on my ever changing “Journal”. Life without change is death!! Thing’s are kinda soft in AZ. now or I would be out there. My Compadre at BlackMagic MotorSports is staying above water.

Like you, the Southwest is my favorite place. Someday it will be where I make my final stand.

–Paul aka Poncho/Pablo

TODAY’S MUSTANGS– Here are some pics of the Mustang bike we discussed on the phone Wednesday. The premise behind the bike was, “If Mustang were still in business today, what would it look like?” This is what our vision was.

–Ike Shelton
949-492-1948
mailto:beccataz@cox.net

Old shot from Bob T.

BIKERNET HANGOVER STUDY–One Star Hangover (*)

No pain. No real feeling of illness. You’re able to function to relatively well. However, you are still parched. You can drink 5 sodas and still feel this way. For some reason, you are craving a steak &fries.

Two Star Hangover (**)
No pain, but something is definitely amiss. You may look okay, but you have the mental capacity of a staple gun. The coffee you are chugging is only increasing your rumbling gut, which is still tossing around the fruity pancake from the 3:00 AM Waffle House excursion. There is some definite havoc being wreaked upon your bowels.

Three Star Hangover (***)
Slight headache. Stomach feels crappy. You are definitely not productive. Anytime a girl walks by you gag because her perfume reminds you of the flavored schnapps shots your alcoholic friends dared you to drink. Life would be better right now if you were home in your bed watching Lucy reruns. You’ve had 4 cups of coffee, a gallon of water, 3 iced teas and a diet coke — yet you haven’t peed once.

Four Star Hangover (****)
Life sucks. Your head is throbbing. You can’t speak too quickly or else you might puke. Your boss has already lambasted you for being late and has given you a lecture for reeking of booze. You wore nice clothes, but that can’t hide the fact that you only shaved one side of your face. (For the ladies, it looks like you put your make-up on while riding the bumper cars.) Your eyes look like one big red vein, and even your hair hurts. Your sphincter is in perpetual spasm, and the first of about five shits you take during the day brings water to the eyes of everyone who enters the bathroom.

Five Star Hangover, (*****)
You have a second heartbeat in your head, which is actually annoying the employee who sits in the next cube. Vodka vapor is seeping out of every pore and making you dizzy. You still have toothpaste crust in the corners of your mouth from brushing your teeth in an attempt to get the remnants of the poop fairy out. Your body has lost the ability to generate saliva soyour tongue is suffocating you. You don’t have the foggiest idea who the hell the stranger was passed out in your bed this morning. Any attempt to defecate results in a fire hose like discharge of alcohol-scented fluid with a rare ‘floater’ thrown in. The sole purpose of this ‘floater’ seems to be to splash the toilet water all over your ass. Death sounds prettygood about right now….

–from Rogue

SOUL ON BIKES– A slice of underground American and African-American history you’re not going to read in any history book.The East Bay Dragons Motorcycle Club have gunned their Harleys through the meanest streets of Oakland, California since the 1950’s. Before Rosa Parks took her historic bus ride, before Martin Luther King, Jr., Malcom X, and Huey P. Newton and the Black Panthers stood bravely for equal rights, the East Bay Dragons MC risked life and limb during days when a black man riding a Harley chopper was a revolutionary act.

Tobie Gene Levingston was born in Tallulah, Louisiana. He founded the East Bay Dragons car club in Oakland, Ca., which eventually became the East Bay Dragons MC, one of the nations leading all-black, Harley-only, motorcycle clubs. Tobie Gene has been the sole president of the East Bay Dragons MC since the club?s formation in 1959.

Available online at.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING, GODDAMNIT–I want to give thanks to everyone who contributes to Bikernet, to my friends who contribute to my feeble bike building skills and to all the women who have kindly put up with me all these years.

In particular I would like to give thanks to Nyla, my partner and lover in life. She’s the best and puts up with all the other broads who buzz around from time to time.

I wish every good brother/rider finds a hard working, dependable woman with the humor, sex drive and savvy as I have found in this one. She’d be perfect except for the sullen evil blonde daughter who follows her around complaining. Regardless, Nyla is thankful for her. Anyway, have a wonderful day.

Ride Forever,

–Bandit–