Continued From Page 1

SCREAMIN? EAGLE RIDER RICH KING INJURED AT PEORIA GRAND NATIONAL–Shoulder Injury Forces King to Pull Out of Main Event after Qualifying. PEORIA, Ill. (Aug. 22, 2004) ? Screamin’ Eagle Performance Parts rider Rich King withdrew from the Peoria TT main event due to a suspected dislocated shoulder. King suffered the injury during a heat race at Peoria Speedway Park?site of round 11 of the AMA Progressive Insurance Flat Track Championship.

King was racing with Bartels? Harley-Davidson rider Shaun Russell for third position on the final lap of the heat race when his bike caught a rut in turn two, sending King off the high side. Despite having both legs on the right side of the motorcycle, King put out an extraordinary effort and managed to stay with his bike, finishing fourth in the heat. However, the effort left King with a suspected dislocated shoulder. A determined King later scored a tough win in his semi-final heat after a long battle with Eaken Racing rider Dan Gedeon, but he decided not to start the 25-lap main due to the pain and weakness in his shoulder.

?Rich King really toughed it out for the Screamin? Eagle team and all the Harley-Davidson fans here today,? said Harley-Davidson Racing Manager Anne Paluso. ?He was in a lot of pain, but went out there and put our bike in the main on a very demanding racetrack. Rich decided that attempting to race in the 25-lap main event would be risky. We?ll have to see how he feels later this week before deciding if he can race at Sedalia.?

The main was won by 20-year-old Henry Wiles, who led from the pole on a Mack Daddy Racing Honda. It was the first AMA Grand National victory of his career. Coziahr Harley-Davidson/National Cycle rider Johnny Murphree was second, followed by KTM USA/Jones Powersports/Mid-America Harley-Davidson rider Joe Kopp.

With his podium finish at Peoria, Kopp inched up on the season points leader, Quality Checked Pre-Owned Ford/Lancaster Harley-Davidson rider Chris Carr, who finished fifth. After 11 of 18 races on the AMA Progressive Insurance Flat Track Championship schedule, Carr has 198 points and a 23-point lead over Kopp. KTM USA/Jones Powersports/Mid-America Harley-Davidson rider Ken Coolbeth, who was 12th at Peoria, is third with 146 points.

The next stop on the AMA Progressive Insurance Flat Track Championship series is August 28 at State Fair Speedway in Sedalia, Mo.

The Screamin’ Eagle Flat Track team is sponsored by Matco Tools.

BIKERNET CARIBBEAN REPORT–You got to be in a coma if you don’t know the Olympic games are taking place. It?s amazing and cool that all these people are able to show up and represent their respective countries in any sport of their liking, I mean, sure it’s not an easy road, but I bet one of the proudest moments in anyone?s life is being there at the podium and listening to your countries anthem. That might be one of the things that I would have loved to experience and never had. Fuck it, even if it was the last place, at least be able to enjoy the whole games by being an athlete. It?s also impressive the amount of commitment seen in these people. no titties though, but more legs and tummies than a plastic surgeon convention in Southern California. It?s also a weird way of the world to equalize things, and don’t start giving me un-american bull. It?s amazing how an unknown athlete can compete and win against the most powerful nations of the world. A big tablespoon of humility to many. Got to love it.

More so, just imagine that all the brotherhood and apparent friendship between athletes could resolve worldwide problems, “So you got oil and weapons, if we kick your ass at the Olympics you get rid of them”. It?s utopic, but it would be cool.

Just imagine yourself running the 200 meters and having a whole country rooting for you. That would be a flattening and amazing moment, then taking all your efforts away because you did not piss enough for a doping test. Such is life in the new world. Sure there’s a bunch of really gay sports, and some chicks that look like guys, but in the whole is a pretty cool gig. More amazing so is how those tiny, tight shorts and micro panties stay in place, no private parts showing, gotta give the chicks credit.

So what does this has to do with bikes, choppers or bobbers? Not a damn thing, but then again, I love been able to say what I want to say, and this is my space so I share all this shit with you guys, which happen to be a few million, all over the world.If any chick athletes are reading this, we want some cleavage, I know flat is fast, but who cares, better to look good than to win.

As you might know, I just got back from the Black Hills and the report is already submitted to the powers to be. It was a really good time and I’m still doing different articles for different publications, so there will be things in other media that is not here and vice versa.

As I have said before, it still amazes me how many people read this, week after week. It?s hard to imagine when the numbers are so high, but every time someone tells me that he reads Bikernet it still amazes me. I know sometimes I say some things that not everybody likes, and sometimes I lay the hammer pretty hard, but then again, if I have to watch my words, I?d rather not do this at all.

Speaking of all this, there’s a lot of new and interesting things happening, more builds, more interest, more magazines noticing what we do, which is cool as long as it helps pay the rent and I’m able to build what I want. But the satisfaction is that I have worked hard for what I have, no brown nosing, no ass kissing, no paying.More so are the friends. Friends from all over the chopper world, people that as some other have said like and respect us for what we do and who we are. That is cool, super cool, even the envious fucks and the hate e-mailers, it’s because you are doing something and people are paying attention, liking it or not.

I’ll use as an example the latest gig at the Journey Museum. There were way better known builders there, and I was amongst them. Not that I see them as celebrities, I see them as good friends. Even guys that I have not met or heard of before had some very cool bobbers there and we all had a good time and had nothing but good things to say about all the bikes there, well, almost all. Anyway, all in all it’s just about being normal and having fun. Michael Lichter and I had a conversation about fame and becoming a celebrity. I guess you have to be in their shoes to actually know how you will behave, then again, I believe I would be the same, and I get to build what I please, and we all know what that is, Old School baby!

Does Bandit sees himself as the most successful magazine editor ever, or Michael Lichter as the best industry photographer of our era? I don’t think so, still they are. Does Jon Towle knows he’s the best cartoonist and sickest fuck I’ve ever known, no to one yes to the other, I don’t know if you catch my drift, but humble, hard working people, will always be so, no matter how good OTHERS consider them. When you have your golden break and you stand on that podium getting that gold around the neck and your countries national anthem, just thank whatever God you believe in and enjoy the moment. It may never happen again. Enjoy it twice if you happen to be the underdog.

With this I’ll leave you ’till next week

Jose, Bikernet in da’ Caribbean mon, reporter

“THE EVOLUTION OF MOTOCROSS”–A Fascinating Video Historyof the Sport of Motocross.Produced by Gary Semics, former Supercross champion with 14 years experienceas a pro racer. Semics has personally trained many of the world’s winningest riders.

“I began racing in 1968, when I was 14 years old. I raced for a living as aprofessional for 14 years,” says Semics.

“In 1985, I began my Motocross School. In the years since, I’ve trained thousands of students, but the one you’ve probably heard the most about is Jeremy McGrath. I had been Jeremy’s personal trainer for most of his career,” says Semics.

“I have trained and coached many other top pro MX racers, including Brock Sellards, Steve Lamson, Ezra Lusk, Kevin Windham, Stephane Roncada, Ernesto Fonseca, John Dowd, Brian Swink, Mike Brown, Kyle Lewis, Jerry Dostal, Branden Jesseman and FredAndrews. It became my goal to train MX riders around the world. In order to reachall the MX enthusiasts, I produced the “Gary Semics Motocross Techniques” VideoSeries,” says Semics. The series presently includes 8 techniques videos and onehistoric video called “The Evolution of Motocross.”

48 years of motocross are covered in this video. We see the legends of motocross in their prime as they form what has become today’s motocross industry. Video footage begins with European racing in 1948 and covers the history of MX all the way to scenes of Jeremy McGrath on his private practice track in 1995.

Better have a big bowl of popcorn for this video!95 minutes (available in VHS only) $39.95

For more information visit www.mxraceschool.com or call 800-500-3938.

BIKERNET FISHING ADVICE–A Biker was stopped by a DNR Game Warden in Wisconsin as he was returningto his campsite with a bucket full of still-alive fish.

“Do you have a license to catch those fish?”, the game warden asked.

“No sir, don’t need one. These are my pet fish”, the Biker replied.

“Pet fish?”, the warden asked.

“Yes, sir. Every night I take these fish down to the lake where I’m campedand let them swim around for awhile. When they hear my whistle, they jumpright back into the bucket and I take them back to the camp.”

“That’s a bunch of crap”, the game warden said, as he reached for his pad ofcitations.

The Biker looked at the game warden for a moment and then said, “If you don’tbelieve me, then follow me back to the lake to see how it works.”

Still suspicious but curious, the game warden agreed. So they walked to thelake. There, the Biker poured the fish into the lake, where they disappearedinto the water.

“Okay”, said the game warden, “Call them back”.

“Call who back?”, the Biker answered.

“The fish”, replied the warden.

“What fish?”, asked the Biker.

–Bob T

Click Here To Enter!

BIKERNET FREE CONTEST WINNERS–Yes, I?m a few weeks behind, so I picked more than one winner. These guys came up with some pretty good suggestions. Let us know what you think.

TOM SAWYER – CLEVES, OHIO 45002 – USA
Suggestion: HI GUYS, GREAT WORK! ONE SUGGESTION WOULD BE TO HAVE A READER BIKE BUILD OFF. DIFFERENT READERS FROM YOUR SITE CAN POST UPDATES AND PICTURES OF THE PROGRESS THEIR BIKES ARE TAKING IN A CERTAIN AMOUNT OF ALOTTED TIME.
Wanted: 1)-BAKER 6 SPEED TRANS FOR SHOVELHEAD 2)-JIMS SHOVELHEAD POWERGLIDE TAPPET KIT. 3)-JIMS OIL PUMP KIT FOR SHOVELHEADS

I don?t know about you guys, but I think he?s got something here. We look forward to comments, suggestions and participants to Tom?s idea.

ARNOLD SCHWARTZ – DENHAM SPRINGS, LOUISIANA 70726 – THE GREAT USA
Suggestion: JUST KEEP ON DOING WHAT YOU’RE DOING. YOU REALLY MAKE ALL THE PRINT RAGS SUCK BAD.
Wanted: A BANDIT’S CANTINA T-SHIRT OR A BIKERNET T-SHIRT

Hey Arnold, if you read this send me an email with the size t-shirt you wear. sinwu@bikernet.com

JOSEPH MAZZA JR – GARFIELD, NJ 07026 – USA
Suggestion: GET SOME STUFF FOR NEW BUILDERS ON THE SITE. I JUST FINISHED BUILDING MY FIRST BIKE FROM THE GROUND UP. ALWAYS WRENCHED MY BIKES AND HAVE REBUILT A FEW BASKETS IN MY DAY. BUT I KILLED MY WIFE AND USED THE INS MONEY TO BUY FRAME, MOTOR AND TRANNY.
Wanted: TO FUCK CINDY CRAWFORD. STOP THE BURING WHEN I PEE. AND MAYBE A NEW TEE SHIRT (BLACK OF COURSE),,,,,,,,

I hope this guys kidding?

AND THE CANTINA WINNERS–

Mike “Moon” Mullen FPO, AP 96310 – USA
Wanted: Medium Bikernet T

Tim Oster – San Diego, Ca 92117 – usa
Wanted: an invite to the next Bikernet party!

Hey Tim, the phone # is on the home page. Give us a call if you?re gonna be down this way for Love Ride weekend.

That?s it till next week– Sin

THE TEACHER–The 6th grade science teacher, Mrs. Parks, asked her class,”Which human body part increases to 10 times its size when stimulated?”No one answered until little Mary stood up angrily and said, “You shouldnot be asking 6th graders a question like that! I’m going to tell myparents, and they will go and tell the principal, who will then fire you!”

With a sneer on her face, she then sat back down.Mrs. Parks ignored her and asked the question again, “Which body partincreases to 10 times its size when stimulated?”

Little Mary’s mouth fell open, then she said to those around her,”Boy, is she going to get in big trouble!”

The teacher continued to ignore her and said to the class,”Anybody?”

Finally, Billy stood up. Looked around nervously, he said, “The body partthat increases 10 times its size when stimulated is the pupil of theeye.”

Mrs. Parks said, “Very good, Billy,” then turned to Mary and continued,”As for you young lady, I have three things to say.One, you have a dirty mind.Two, you didn’t read your homework andThree, one day you are going to be very, very disappointed.”

–from Ken Miller

Continued On Page 3

Hey, yesterday we worked accessorizing the rubbermounted 2004 Sportster for American Rider while throwing old parts in a box for Busters project bike. Buster is a young rider, who has a 2000 Sporty, but he’s chompin’ at the bit to build a chopper.

Irish Rich turned him onto a terrific deal on an old, but sturdy, Paughco rigid, which arrived yesterday, and he couldn’t wait for me to see and bless it. This kid works for the school district, helping with severely handicapped kids. He has two of his own and another one on the way. His wife also works, but they are obviously struggling.

After looking at the frame, I dug into my old boxes of parts and started throwing fenders, rear wheel, kickstands, pedals and shit together for his effort. Buster helps us out around the shop trying to learn and absorb any chopper shit he can. It’s that gleam in his eye as he looks at the sleek lines of that old school Paughco chopper frame that tells me he’s in it for the long run. You’ll see it come together on Bikernet. Strictly a home-built, basket case effort.

We have several features headed your way, but I’ll hold off and start the news:

VIETNAM MEMORIAL PLAQUE DEDICATED WITH THE HELP OF HARLEY-DAVIDSON–In May of 2001, Harley-Davidson Motor Company first announced plans to contribute $50,000 toward the funding of the memorial plaque at the Vietnam Veterans Memorial in Washington D.C. Three years later, the In Memory Memorial Plaque was officially unveiled in a ceremony on July 8, 2004.

The ceremony was open to the public and was attended by veterans and loved ones of veterans who have perished since the end of the Vietnam War. Remarks were made by project organizers, members of Congress, as well as Harley-Davidson Director of Government Affairs, Wayne Curtin who honored the sacrifices of the veterans on behalf of Motor Company employees, dealers and customers.

The In Memory Memorial Plaque is dedicated to those Vietnam Veterans who died after serving in the war, but whose death was a result of their service in the conflict. Many veterans died after the war from being exposed to toxins during services or from complications of Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome. These individuals are not listed on the Vietnam Veterans Memorial Wall, but are now memorialized through this plaque.

BIKERNET 13 FILE–1. Now that food has replaced sex in my life, I can’t even get into my own pants.

2. Marriage changes passion.Suddenly you’re in bed with a relative.

3. I saw a woman wearing a sweat shirt with “Guess” on it.So I said “Implants?” She hit me.

4. How come we choose from just two people to run forpresident and 50 for Miss America?

5. A good friend will come and bail you out of jail…but, a true friend willbe sitting next to you saying, “Darn…that was fun!”

6. I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose-fittingclothing. If I HAD any loose-fitting clothing, I wouldn’t have signed up in thefirst place!

7. When I was young we used to go “skinny dipping,” now I just “chunky dunk.”

8. Don’t argue with an idiot; people watching may not be able to tell the difference.

9. Wouldn’t it be nice if whenever we messed up our life we could simply press’Ctrl Alt Delete’ and start all over? AMEN, AMEN !!

10. Why is it that our children can’t read a Bible in school, but they can in prison?

11. Wouldn’t you know it…Brain cells come and brain cells go, but FAT cells live forever.

12. Why do I have to swear on the Bible in court when the Ten Commandmentscannot be displayed in a federal building?

13. Bumper sticker of the year:”If you can read this, thank a teacher and, since it’s in English, thank asoldier !!”

–from Skooter

BIKETOBERFEST 2004– I Know, I Know we are still doing the Sturgis reports but this is HOT!Biketoberfest 2004 Daytona Beach Florida is officially October 21-24 but many places start as early as the 15th. Watch here for more reports.

Want to save some money and have a great time too? Consider staying in Cocco Beach just South of Daytona. The local news paper just published an article about the Space Coast Office of Tourism campaign to bring people to the area during September and October when hotel occupancy is at 50-55 percent compared to March which is 80 percent. To me that means you can get a good deal, especially if you shop around.

More and more people are getting upset with high prices and the way they are being treated in the Daytona area are staying further out and riding into Daytona for the events and things they want to see and do.

The Space Coast of Florida has a lot to offer. Besides lower rates there is great beaches, restaurants, cruise ships with gambling, the Space Center and the best thing of all the area is BIKER FRIENDLY. It is a short ride to Daytona and there are many places to stop on the way that are having biker events.

Hey Come On Down and Have Some Fun In The Sun.

–ROGUE

FLORIDA DUIs–The news papers and television are full of articles and ads about the You Drink, You Drive, You Lose campaign going on through out Florida. The campaign is scheduled to start August 28th and run through the Labor Day weekend and ends on September 12 2004.

There will be road blocks, checkpoints and numerous other operations to arrest people who have been drinking.

The Safety Council says that it costs the average person arrested for DUI in Florida $16,000. And that does not count all the bullshit you have to go through that goes along with it. It should be noted that more average people that have only had a few drinks are stopped and arrested for DUI that Alcoholics or people with Blood Alcohol Content of 1.2 or 1.4 which are the ones usually involved with death causing crashes.

Of course the average person is a source of large revenue to the state, courts, lawyers and other agencies so these stops will continue until people get tired of it and have the laws changed.

So have a Good Time but be careful and safe.

–ROGUE

WAY TO GO – JAY LENO–The Secret Service has announced it is doubling its protection for JohnKerry. You can understand why – with two positions on every issue, he hastwice as many people mad at him.”

– Jay Leno

–from Rev CarlR

MOTORCYCLE LAWS IN LONDON–In London, it’s illegal to have sex on a parked motorcycle. It did not say any thing about if the motorcycle was moving.

–from Rogue
http://www.bikerrogue.com

MOTORCYCLE VS. 18-WHEELERS– Safety, common sense are the first rules of the road. If you have ever been stunned by a motorcycle that appears out of nowhere on the freeway, you know the awful feeling that comes with the realization that if you had been in the process of changing lanes As motorcycles become more powerful, and riders more brazen, and motorists more distracted by cell phone conversations, there is no end to the well justified fears of cars and trucks colliding with motorcycles. The accident Friday that resulted in the death of a motorcyclist on the 710 (Long Beach, California) Freeway is a tragic example of why motorcyclists are so vulnerable.

It’s common for a motorist to be barreling along in the carpool lane, only to be passed — in the same lane — by a motorcyclist traveling well over the speed limit. The roar of the motorcyclist’s high-revving engine can startle and confuse a motorist, with tragic consequences.

It’s common in stop-and-go traffic to be caught by surprise by a motorcyclist sharing a lane with a car as the motorcyclist tries to guide his machine through a narrow path between cars and trucks. It’s legal in California to share lanes, but the DMV manual for motorcyclists discourages the practice. We’d like to see a law that would ban it entirely.

We’ll go a step further. It’s legal for motorcyclists to use the 710 Freeway, but it’s not smart, safe or necessary. Motorcyclists who try to compete with 18-wheelers are at a fatal disadvantage.

Aside from allowing motorcycles to share lanes and use the HOV lanes on freeways, motorcyclists must obey the same rules as motorists. Laws against speeding and erratic lane changes apply to motorcycles, too. Given their vulnerability, motorcyclists would be wise to avoid lingering in motorists’ blind spots and sharing lanes at high speeds.

In a motorcycle-car accident, trying to determine who is at fault is secondary to the horrible injuries and tragic deaths that result from bad driving by inattentive drivers and motorcyclists who think they are invulnerable. As the DMV manual says, the old saying that you can’t hit what you don’t see doesn’t apply to cars and motorcycles.

This article is an indication of our general society perception of bikers. Actually it should be geared directly at the reason for motorcycle accidents in 70-80 percent of accidents–motorists. It should be slamming them for not using turn signals, for making erratic lane changes, talking on cell phones, smoking or stuffing their faces while driving.

Imagine if this article was geared at children playing in streets. A child has about the same protection from an automobile as any biker. I would love to see this reporter from the Press Telegram attempt to tell the public that kids should stay off the streets so motorists can jabber on a cell phones and not worry about running over pedistrians.–Bandit

NEW MOTORCYCLE LAND SPEED RECORD–A single enging Kawasaki designed by a man who works for JPL set a new land speed record at Bonneville this year at 332 mph. Easy-Hook, the name of the ride, broke the Easyriders 18-year record or 321 set in ’96 or ’97. I was a proud member of that team powered by two 92-inch Shovelheads and 10,000 ER readers.

This Kaw project took six years of meticulous design efforts.

THE BLONDE FILES– What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant?

“Are you sure it’s mine?”

LUCKY DEVIL PART II COMING TO BIKERNET–Here are some shots of the front render for Lucky Devil 001. It is a single side mount to keep the right side clean. At this point everything is out to paint and I am working on the frame and sheetmetal for the chop off. I can’t show photos of that till after the event, but I will document the construction of the frame as well as sheetmetal and final assembly and share them after the event is over.

Take care, Kent

PRICEY BIKES STOLEN DURING RAINSTORM–When Todd “Red” Laube of Madison went to the Sturgis Motorcycle Rally last weekend, he never imagined he would be returning home early without his $35,000 custom bike.

Laube and his friend Wes Josephson, who own Titan Gecko RM Retro motorcycles, stopped at the Broken Spoke bar in Sturgis, along with their wives, to wait for a rainstorm to pass. When they went back outside, their bikes were gone, along with their leather jackets, chaps and other belongings.

Laube said they had been in Sturgis for only four hours when the one-of-a-kind bikes were stolen Aug. 7.

“We arrived at the Spoke around 1 p.m. and went in to have a beer and visit with people for a while,” Laube said. “By the time the rain stopped around 5 p.m., we went outside and they were gone.”

Sturgis police say about 12 to 16 motorcycles are stolen each year during the rally, and few of them are recovered.

“We’ve had five bikes stolen so far this year at the rally, and we had 12 last year,” said Sturgis Detective Gerard Brennan.

“It’s very unusual for us to recover these stolen bikes immediately. These thefts are usually done by professionals, and in many cases they get out of the area quickly.”

But Laube said he thinks the bikes still might be in the Sturgis area, and whoever stole them probably put them in a trailer.

A total of four bikes were stolen Aug. 7, Brennan said, and the others were similar to Laube’s and Josephson’s.

“I don’t want my insurance company’s check,” he said. “I just want my bike.”

Anyone with information is asked to call the Sturgis Police Department at 605-347-2573.

BY CRAIG HENRYArgus Leader

–from Rogue

BIG BEAR GRIZZLY RUN–Did the Big Bear Grizzly Run today…Left the desert at 6:00 AM. First time in a while to wear a leather jacket it was 40 degrees when I rolled up into the pine tree covered mountains.

It was cool after being in the desert of 100 plus degrees. It was a nice change. A good crowd showed up as the morning progressed. They had a poker run to benefit the Zoo. Good time and seeing old friends.

–Bob T

Continued On Page 2

THE AIM/NCOM MOTORCYCLE E-NEWS SERVICE is brought to you by Aid to Injured Motorcyclists (A.I.M.) and the National Coalition of Motorcyclists (NCOM), and is sponsored by the Law Offices of Richard M. Lester. For more information, call us at 1-(800) ON-A-BIKE or visit us on our website at http://www.ON-A-BIKE.com.

COAST TO COAST BIKER NEWS
Compiled & Edited by Bill Bish,
National Coalition of Motorcyclists

POCKET BIKES FUEL SUMMER CRAZE, DRAW IRE The next big thing is just 18 inches high, weighs about 50 lbs. and is capable of traveling up to 70 m.p.h. Meet the pocket bike, scaled-down mini-motorcycles also known as pocket rockets; though some call them a menace and refer to the summer’s hottest fad as an epidemic. The tiny two-wheelers sound like a souped up weed wacker, and tens of thousands of them are hitting the street?where they are illegal to operate in most states.

First popularized in Europe in the mid-90’s as specialized race motorbikes, pocket bikes are now being sold as toys in Wal-Mart and Toys “R” Us as well as in motorcycle stores, auto parts places and flea markets. Thousands are for sale on e-Bay. Over the past several months, a flood of cheap Chinese-made knock-offs that cost between $200 and $400 have hit the American market, where they are predominantly purchased by adolescent boys with no licenses and no concept of rules of the road.

Fans say the little motorized bikes are affordable, comfortable and fun to ride, but based on the number of citizen’s complaints about the noise and of riders zipping along sidewalks or in and out of traffic, the mini-motorcycles have become tiny terrors.

The midget cycles are catching everyone’s eye, including that of law enforcement and lawmakers around the country.

In New York, State Senator John Sabini has called for a ban on the sale of pocket bikes, citing the recent death of a Queens teenager who was killed when his miniature motorcycle hit a pothole while he was trying to elude police. “These scooters, pocket bikes and motorized skateboards are all illegal [on the street], and yet we sell them,” Sabini said. “Why are they allowed to be sold when they’re illegal? It would be like selling heroin but saying you’re not allowed to use it.”

Sabini has introduced a bill targeting the sale of some scooters and other motorized vehicles, including skateboards.

A string of accidents has added fuel to the fire, including a near fatal crash in San Francisco on June 9, when a 14-year-old boy, driving on the wrong side of the street, was hit by an SUV. By the next weekend, the California Highway Patrol issued a ruling that the bikes are illegal to ride anywhere besides racetracks and private property, prompting local police districts throughout the state to crack down. In the last few weeks, similar crackdowns have been reported from Phoenix to New Haven.

New York police will ticket riders if their bikes are not insured or they are not licensed. To qualify as a legal motor vehicle in New York state, bikes must have mirrors and lights and be registered. Boston recently passed legislation that says pocket bikes can be ridden only by licensed drivers, who must wear a helmet and obey the rules of the road.

Pocket bikes are considered motorcycles under Arizona state law, but there is no way they could ever meet the necessary safety standards, say police who have been ticketing anyone riding pocket bikes on streets or sidewalks.

In Springfield, Mass., the City Council tightened up the city’s 2003 motor scooter ordinance to include any of the smaller vehicles. The ordinance now covers any two-wheeled, motorized, gas- or electric-powered device that has handlebars and is designed to be ridden while either standing up or seated. Drivers must be at least 16 years old and have been issued at least a learner’s permit. Police have confiscated between 45 and 50 scooters and mini-motorcycles, and have issued numerous citations since turning up the heat on the hot new mini-cycles.

A few years ago, the New Bedford City Council banned motorized scooters, which created similar traffic hazards, from the city’s streets and sidewalks. In June, Ward 2 Councilor Paul Koczera moved to include pocket bikes in the ban, but he was told that the bikes can be regulated only by the Massachusetts state Legislature. “I haven’t given up on the matter,” Mr. Koczera said.

http://ads1.advance.net/RealMedia/ads/click_nx.ads/www.masslive.com/xml/story/union_news/n/nnae/@StoryAd?x

The bikes aren’t street-legal anywhere in Texas, but they can be ridden on private property.

In California, pocket bikes are illegal on public roads, because they are motor vehicles that require registration. But the department of motor vehicles will not register them because most do not pass safety regulations governing headlight height from the ground, taillights, brake lights, horns and so on.

But websites of some pocket-bike sellers boast “no registration or insurance required in most states,” and some show promotional videos of people riding the bikes on public streets.

One advantage to their small size, say police, is that officers can easily confiscate them by picking them up and throwing them in the trunk of their cruiser.

GAS PRICES DRIVE SCOOTER SALES TO RECORD NUMBERS The high cost of gasoline is a good thing for scooter manufacturers, who have seen sales numbers skyrocket faster than prices at the pump.

According to the Washington Post, with U.S. prices for regular unleaded gas reaching $2 a gallon, Piaggio SpA, the Italian maker of Vespa motor scooters, has launched a major assault on the American automotive market, heavily targeting cities on the East and West coasts where commuters are seeking less costly modes of personal transportation.

Other scooter manufacturers, such as Honda Motor Co. and Yamaha Motor Co., are pursuing the same market. They are betting that thousands of Americans, at least for daily runs between home and office or quick trips to the supermarket, are willing to abandon their more fuel-thirsty cars and trucks for scooters, mopeds and motorbikes — that can get from 60 to 90 miles per gallon of gasoline.

Vespa also markets stylish accessories such as hats, jackets, watches, bags, etc., and 35 percent of their buyers are women.

So far, according to figures published by the Motorcycle Industry Council in Irvine, Calif., that bet is paying off in terms of rapidly rising U.S. scooter sales. MIC analysts say U.S. scooter sales rose to 84,000 last year, up from 12,000 in 1997. They are projecting a 20 percent increase in scooter sales for 2004, up to 100,800.

High mileage and low purchase prices are boosting the ranks of scooter owners, though certain misconceptions also are playing a role in higher scooter sales. For example, there is a popular belief among scooter shoppers that they can buy and ride the bikes with little or no training and without getting a license.

In reality, scooter laws vary from state to state, but in general motorcycle licenses are required for scooters with an engine displacement exceeding 50 cc and with top speeds above 60 miles per hour, but not required for below 50 cc with a top speed of 30 mph — those generally forbidden on highways.

ROAD DEATHS REACH RECORD LOW The Department of Transportation announced that the fatality rate on our nation’s highways in 2003 was the lowest since record keeping began 29 years ago, according to U.S. Transportation Secretary Norman Y. Mineta. The number of crash-related injuries also dropped to a historic low in 2003.

A total of 42,643 people died, and 2.89 million were injured in 2003. In 2002, 43,005 were killed and 2.93 million were injured.

Secretary Mineta pointed to efforts by the U.S. Department of Transportation’s National Highway Traffic Safety Administration (NHTSA) that contributed to the reduction in the fatal accident rate, including campaigns to encourage safety belt use and discourage impaired driving, work with state legislatures to pass tougher safety belt and drunk driving laws, and rulemaking efforts to improve vehicle safety standards.

The drop is more striking for the fact that people did more driving in 2003. When measured by the estimated miles driven, the number of deaths per 100 million vehicle miles traveled (VMT) fell to 1.48 in 2003, down from 1.51 in 2002 and the lowest level since record-keeping began in 1966. It was the first time the rate has dropped below 1.5. In 2003, VMT increased to 2.88 trillion, up from 2.86 trillion in 2002

Motorcycle deaths rose for the sixth year in a row, this time by 12 percent from 3,270 in 2002 to 3,661 last year. NHTSA said it doesn’t yet know if there were more miles ridden on motorcycles in 2003, but it’s likely since there has been a steady increase in motorcycle travel since 1997.

Alcohol-related fatalities also dropped significantly in 2003, the first such decline since 1999, as more states adopted laws that allowed them to prosecute drivers at .08 blood alcohol content (BAC) and above. 2004 marks the first year that all 50 states, the District of Columbia and Puerto Rico were able to prosecute drivers at .08 BAC.

ANIMALS BLAMED FOR A QUARTER MILLION CRASHES YEARLY Deer, cows and even squirrels are to blame for more than 26,000 injuries along the nation’s roads each year, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention in their first-ever study to examine how many people suffer non-fatal injuries in car accidents involving animals.

In half of the animal-related accidents surveyed in 2001-02, motorists were injured by hitting the animal while the other half were hurt by swerving to avoid hitting the animals, said Ann Dellinger of CDC’s motor vehicle injury prevention team. “We can’t really say whether it’s better to brake or better to swerve and avoid the animal,” Dellinger said. “You have to drive responsibly and make sure that you are buckled up.”

Each year, about 200 people die in animal-related crashes out of the nearly 44,000 traffic fatalities nationwide. There were 247,000 crashes involving animals in 2000, the latest federal highway data available.

The CDC doesn’t know if the number of car/animal accidents are on the rise. They typically happen on rural roads or highways. Although nearly nine out of 10 such accidents involve deer, the CDC’s crash study also found cows, squirrels, bears, dogs and raccoons.

The CDC said putting tall fences at deer crossing spots and channeling deer to underpasses would help, but noted the cost might be prohibitive for many public roads budgets.

ROAD DEBRIS LINKED TO THOUSANDS OF ACCIDENTS A hunk of tire tread, an old muffler, a bag of garbage?more than just an eyesore along America’s roadways, debris causes 25,000 crashes and up to 90 fatalities a year in the United States and Canada, says the AAA Foundation for Traffic Safety, a research arm of the automobile association.

Although vehicle-related road debris crashes are generally less severe than other crashes, individual incidents can be catastrophic, and the study said even small objects on roads can cause serious problems because drivers traveling at highway speeds sometimes lose control of their vehicles while trying to avoid debris. Swerving to avoid the debris accounted for 45 percent of the fatal crashes, studies showed.

A survey of government transportation officials in the United States and Canada found the most common forms of road debris are, in order: tire treads; garbage from waste haulers; lumber and construction materials; gravel, soil and tree limbs, mufflers and exhaust parts. Overloading or improperly loading cargo onto passenger vehicles, such as mattresses or furniture, caused 12 percent of the crashes reports said.

It’s the first time a comprehensive tally of such accidents has been done, according to AAA.

The study noted that increased defensive driving awareness, more commercial vehicle driver training to inspect the vehicle and cargo and stricter enforcement on truck weights could reduce the rate of road hazard wrecks.

It also called for stiffer penalties in the form of fines and demerit license points for those who fail to properly secure loads, and it recommended targeting specific groups, such as waste haulers andlandscapers, with enforcement action.

To safely avoid road debris you should maintain a safe following distance of four to five seconds between vehicles at highway speeds, and focus further down the road by scanning at least 12 seconds ahead to be able to see and react to changing highway conditions. Sudden movements by cars up ahead often indicate a road hazard. AAA also advises that it is sometimes safer to run over debris than to swerve into adjacent lanes of traffic. Striking minor road debris can be far less dangerous than veering into oncoming traffic, or risk losing control of your vehicle.

WEIRD NEWS: TEENS ADMIT TO INJURING BIKERS WITH PLASTIC WRAP Four teenage boys from Waukesha, Wisc., admitted pulling a “stupid prank” by stretching kitchen-variety wrap across a road that caused a motorcycle to crash, according to Waukesha County District Attorney Paul Bucher who said the boys could face charges of being delinquent in juvenile court.

Daniel Buckel, 22, of the Town of Waukesha, went out for a ride last month with his girlfriend, Theresa Brzykcy, 19, of Brookfield, when his motorcycle crashed into the plastic wrap stretched between two traffic posts, causing his 2002 Honda motorcycle to slide across the pavement and the two landed on a nearby driveway. Buckel broke a finger and needed 15 stitches to close a gash above his eye, while Brzykcy was knocked unconsciousness for a short time but was not seriously injured.

Buckel, who works as a bartender and selling motorcycles, said the crash caused him to miss two weeks of work. He said he was relieved to learn that authorities had found the suspects.

BOAT BUILDER BUYS INDIAN In a move aimed at revving up an American icon, owners of the country’s oldest luxury boat maker, Chris-Craft, have bought the defunct Indian Motorcycle Co., the legendary brand that once rivaled Harley-Davidson for U.S. motorcycle sales.

London-based Stellican Ltd., which purchased and turned-around a bankrupt Chris-Craft Corp. four years ago, hopes to replicate their success with Indian.

“There are huge parallels,” Stellican founder and Chris-Craft Chairman Stephen Julius said in comparing the two companies. “Both once had dominance in their industries, and properly cared for, these brands can be brought back to life,” Julius added

“They’re both iconic American heritage brands with loyal followings that fell on some tough times,” he said. “To bring it back, having a sense of the brand is vital. It is something we proved at Chris-Craft and we intend to do the same with Indian.”

As with Chris-Craft, Stellican’s purchase of Indian’s trademark, logos and licensing rights might also translate into local manufacturing jobs. “We’re evaluating a whole range of alternatives in California, the Southern states, and certainly Southwest Florida,” Julius told the Associated Press, referring to a site for a new Indian manufacturing plant.

Stellican intends to spend the next three to six months evaluating Indian’s prospects and the overall market before building a single new motorcycle.

“We’ll find our own niche,” Julius said. “Indian has a cult-like following.”

Indian, “America’s first motorcycle,” was founded in 1901 in Springfield, Mass. and competed head-to-head with Harley-Davidson for control of the U.S. market before ceasing its U.S. production in 1953. It was resurrected by an investment consortium in Gilroy, Calif. in late 1998, but closed without warning on Sept. 19, 2003, despite rising sales numbers.

QUOTABLE QUOTE: “None are more hopelessly enslaved than those who falsely believe they are free.”
–Johann Wolfgang von Goethe (1749 – 1832) German dramatist, novelist, poet, & scientist

A BLONDE BREAK FROM THE NEWS A married couple were asleep when the phone rang at 2 in the morning.

The wife (undoubtedly blonde), picked up the phone, listened a moment and said, “How should I know, that’s 200 miles from here!” and hung up.

The husband said, “Who was that?”

The wife said, “I don’t know, some woman wanting to know if the coast is clear.”

A FINAL WARNINGRecently it was reported in the Los Angeles times that motorcycle accidents were up for LA. I want to get my hands on this story, but a reliable friend reported that the Police Chief said he would initiate pulling over more motorcyclists.

Over 70 percent of MC accidents are caused by motorists. What the hell? Pull cagers over for not using turnsignals, unsafe lane changes, etc.

He plans to pull bikers over for equipment checks and DOT helmet infractions. We’ll bring you more on this report in the near future, but watch out Socal riders.–Bandit

Continued From Page 3

FREE EXHAUST SYSTEM–JUST FILL IN SURVEY–Just click on the banner above and check it out. No big deal, but you are showing support for Bikernet.com. This will blow your mind. This marketing agency has run banners and requests on several bike mag site with little response.

Here’s what they said, “Dude, We already have had 100+ people take the survey today! As of two days ago we only had 157 after being on XXXX’s site for two weeks. We are over 300 now! Pretty cool, huh?”

That was after a day on Bikernet. The next day we received the following report, “We now have 406! I need 660 total. Maybe we’ll get what we need over the weekend,” said Bill T.

Thanks for taking to time to fill out the survey. Hopefully a Bikenet reader will receive the exhaust system.

–Bandit

Monday morning – we now have 530! Not too far off the 660 I need for accurate data. We should probably have it by tomorrow or Wed.

As of Wednesday we hit 579. Let’s wrap it up and get a free set of pipes for a Bikernet Reader.–Bandit

BIKERNET SEXUAL STUDY– I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart. I have never figured out why the sexual desire gene gets thrown into a state of turmoil, when it hears the words “I do.”

For example, one evening last week, my wife and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says “I don’t feel like it, I just want you to hold me.”

I said “WHAT????!!! What was that?!”

So she says the words that every husband on the planet dreads to hear…”You’re just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.”

She responded to my puzzled look by saying, “Can’t you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?”

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night I went to sleep. The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn’t decide which one to take so I told her we’ll just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said lets get a pair for each outfit. We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings.

Let me tell you…she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn’t even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said, “That’s fine, honey.” She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement.

Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, “I think this is all dear, Let’s go to the cashier”.

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, “No honey, I don’t feel like it.”

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled WHAT???!!!”

I then said, “Really honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for awhile.. You’re just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman.”

And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me I added, “Why can’t you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?”

Apparently I’m not having sex tonight either.

–from Skooter

OC ROADHOUSE GRAND OPENING SATURDAY 21ST–Costa Mesa, CA – Our official FastDates.com apparel designer and supplier, Feelin’ Lucky, is opening its first retail consumer store with a big Open House Party this coming weekend at its new location in Costa Mesa, CA. The grand opening celebration for O.C. Roadhouse takes place this Saturday, August 21st from 11am – 5pm.

In attendance will be FastDates.com Calendar photographer and publisher Jim Gianatsis, together with one of the beautiful Calendar Angels to autograph and sell the new 2005 FastDates.com Calendars. The OC Roadhouse is located at 1660 Placentia Avenue in Costa Mesa, CA 92627. Phone 949-645-3550. Additional details and map online at www.OCRoadhouse.com

PAUL’S NEW TATTOO–My new friend–thought you might like to see my new tattoo! It was created by Richie.

–Paul Vestal

JANKLOW ADJUSTING TO PRIVATE LIFE–PIERRE – A year after a fatal crash that ended his political career, Bill Janklow, a dominating force in South Dakota politics for nearly 30 years, is said to be adjusting to private life.But neither Janklow nor those closest to him will discuss what he’s doing or any of his future plans.

Janklow, a former state attorney general, South Dakota’s only four-term governor and a first-term congressman, fell from grace Aug. 16, 2003, when he ran a stop sign 10 miles south of Flandreau and killed motorcyclist Randy Scott of Hardwick, Minn.

The crash not only devastated the Scott and Janklow families but also rocked South Dakota’s political landscape. Janklow, a Republican who long enjoyed nearly unbridled influence, was convicted of second-degree manslaughter in December and resigned from Congress.

–By Joe Kafka, Associated Press Writer

–from Rogue

TEENS CHARGE IN PLASTIC WRAP CASE–On July 13, 2004, Daniel Buckel and his girlfriend, Theresa Brzykcy, weretaking a relaxing ride on Buckel’s 2002 Honda. As the night air cooled, ahazy fog cover masked the roadway, and Buckel slowed down to around 40 mph.That likely saved his and Theresa’s lives. Suddenly, they were catapultedthrough the air, landing on a nearby driveway. Buckel required 15 stitchesto close a cut on his head and received a broken finger. Theresa was knockedunconscious when she hit the ground.

Someone had stretched kitchen variety plastic wrap across the roadway,attached to two sign posts. The consequences could have been deadly, but inthis instance luck was on the side of the riders. Waukesha County CrimeStoppers offered a $1,000 reward for information leading to the arrest andconviction of those responsible for this act. Attorney Michael F. Hupy,nationally known for fighting for motorcyclist’s rights and representinginjured bikers, offered an additional $5,000. According to Waukesha CountySheriff’s Department Detective Steve Pederson, they received over 50tips regarding the plastic wrap case.

Some tips pointed directly to certain individuals, and after interviewingthem, the Sheriff’s Department received calls from attorneys representingfour teens who were interviewed, one 14 year old, and three 16 year olds.The older teens could be waived over and charged as adults, but it isunlikely according to the District Attorney.

Attorney Hupy offered the $5,000 reward in order to prompt someone to comeforward with information. He said the sheriff will determine whom, among the50 tipsters, will get the reward. He also stated that although he willrepresent the injured bikers, he will not accept a fee but rather donate anyfee to a local motorcycle safety organization. He said he offered thereward in an attempt to make sure this kind of thing doesn’t happen again.This type of prank could have been fatal for motorcyclists, and he wantsother teens to realize the consequences of such actions.

HELMET LAW ENFORCED IN LOUISIANA–Authorities will soon begin enforcing an updated law that will requiremotorcyclists to wear a helmet in Louisiana.On Sunday, helmets must meet the Department Of Transportation requirementsand have the proper lining, padding, visor and chin strap.

The new law says you must have a helmet on while operating or riding on amotor driven cycle or bicycle.

Note: Visit ABATE of LA’s site: http://www.abateoflouisiana.org/ andlearn more about Operation Freedom Bucket.

ANOTHER BAD DAY JOKE–After a long night of making love, he turns on the light and suddenly notices a photo of another man on her nightstand by the bed. He begins to worry.

“Is this your husband?” he nervously asks.

“No, silly,” she replies, snuggling up to him.

“Your boyfriend, then?” he continues.

“No, not at all,” she says, nibbling away at his ear.

“Is it your dad or your brother?” he inquires, hoping to be reassured.

“No, no, no!!!” she answers.

“Well, who is he, then?” he demands .

“That’s me before my surgery.”

–from Sifu

TONY MURGA CUSTOM BOOTS MOVED– My daughter called me yesterday to let me know she did a google search and look what we found-thanks for the plug man!! Very cool! Just to let you know we have a new address, phone, email so here it is. Perhaps you can update your web page and also give us a call some time. Thanks again for the press.

We’ll be in Las Vegas for Biketoberfest 9/16-19/04 – Cashmens Vendor Village and Daytona Beach Biketoberfest 10/21-24/04.

Murga Boot Co.
27762 Forbes Rd. STe. 7
Laguna Niguel, CA 92688
949-582-8650 t
949-582-8692 f
email :murgaboots@aol.com
web site : http://www.murgaboots.com

THAT’S IT–Women are after me. I need to wrap this up and hide out. We’re proud to be working with S&S, the first time since Bikernet kicked it’s doors open. I’ve always had tremendous respect for the Smith family, and can’t wait to slip that 93-inch S&S Shovel Motor in my new project chopper. Watch for upcoming techs on the concept and on how we can build a Shovel to be as reliable as an Evo.

Also, Sturgis Reports are rolling in. Next week will be a bear. Oh, shit the women are cutting a dusty trail up the street. Plus, I just finished my On Line Traffic School for my 92 mph Laughin Ticket. My deadline is this weekend.

Later,

–Bandit

Continued From Page 2

BIKERNET HEADQUARTER BREAK-IN–I HEARD HIM TRYING TO BREAK IN.I RAN TO THE CABINET GRABBED MY AUTOMATIC,SLAMMED THE CLIP IN AND CHAMBERED A ROUND.I WAS SCARED AS I SNUCK DOWN THE HALLTO THE BACK DOOR.I ALSO GRABBED A FLASH LIGHT.

I OPENED THE DOOR AS QUIETLY AND AS SLOWLYAS I COULD.I TIP TOED TO THE SIDE OF THE HOUSE WHERE IHEARD HIM STILL WORKING ON THE SCREEN.I TURNED THE CORNER AND PUT THE FLASHLIGHTAND GUN IN HIS FACE.

I YELLED, “HANDS UP!” AS HE TURNED TO FACE ME.

Yep.It Was A Cat Burglar.

–from Bob T.

PUSH-BUTTON KICKSTAND AND DIGITAL-DISPLAY MIRRORS–RIDLEY MOTORCYCLE COMPANY received an enthusiastic response during Daytona Bike Week to its button-operated kickstand. Lifting the side stand by means of hand controls means both feet can remain planted on the ground. It also eliminates the possibility of contact being made between the rider’s foot and the primary cover, which can cause scratching.

Digital-display mirrors are a further hi-tech product from Ridley. When the motorcycle is switched off, the mirrors appear as standard. When the bike is switched on, however, they light up, showing a wealth of digitized information. The mirrors display data for: speedometer, odometer, tachometer, trip meter, high/low beam, oil pressure, neutral and turn-signal indicators.

RIDLEY MOTORCYCLE COMPANY
Oklahoma City, Oklahoma, USA
Tel: 405 525 5400
Fax: 405 525 5438
E-mail: ridley.jay@ridleymotorcycle.com
http://www.ridleymotorcycle.comp>

ACCIDENT SCENE MANAGEMENT–Great news about an event to help Accident Scene Management classes. Please print the attached flier and distribute to bike shops, businesses and biker bars. A film crew from California is coming with Milwaukee Iron to shoot an episode during this show, and will air sometime in January. The bike show is free to the public, and will be a fun event which will benefit the biker community by supporting Accident Scene Management.

Please attend and show your support. The Slinger Speedway is north of Milwaukee, Wisconsin, about 30 miles from downtown. Take Hwy 41 north to the Slinger exit at Hwy 144. Follow the signs to the speedway, just a mile or so from the exit.

Saturday, September 4, 2004
Slinger Speedway
Slinger, WI
9:00 AM to 5:00 PM
Free Admission!
Sponsored by:
West Bend Mutual
George Prescott

9:00 – 10:00 AM: Bike Registration, Radical Bikes and Choppers ONLY

10:00 1:00 PM: Bike Show – Judged by Celebrity Judges & Show participants

New York Mike, owner of San Diego Harley Davidson,Senator Dave Zien, Motorcycle Hall of Fame award winnerTony “Pan” Sanfelipo, Founder of ABATE of Wisconsin & Motorcycle Hall of Fame award winner

1:00 – 2:00 PM: Chopper Parade & Awards
2:00 – 4:00 PM: Milwaukee Iron Celebrity Ride (Starts and ends at Slinger Speedway)Lead by Senator Mary Panzer and the Women In Motion Road Guards
4:00 – 5:00 PM: Raffle Prizes & Autograph SigningMeet Randy Simpson, owner of Milwaukee Iron and the stars of Southern Steel from Virginia. They will be showing their bikes and filming for an episode of “Southern Steel” a series that will be aired on the Discovery Channel.

All Proceeds to benefit Accident Scene Management, Inc.

THE BIKERNET CARIBBEAN BLACK HILLS BRIEF REPORT–Well the trip is almost over, we are dropping the trailer at Jax Port after a long as drive back from the Black Hills, the full story will soon follow. We visited Hank Young’s shop on the way back, so there will be some photos and stories about that too, and be sure I’m going to mess around with the newbies and rubs, so get those hate e-mails ready, it won’t be long.

As always the drive back is a total pain in the ass, but we get to see many of our friends’ places, a kind of ritual that we are only able to do once a year. My Bobber is on it’s way to Vegas and then Cali, so I guess the frequent flyer miles are going to keep racking up.

I noticed a lot of people up in Sturgis this year, but then again this is edging on the story so I will save it. We, as always, had a good time at the house, with all kinds of friends and what became new friends visiting. It was a bit too cold for this tropical soul, but we still managed some riding.

My bobber was shot for Easyriders by none other than Michael Lichter, which I want to thank for putting the bob’s back gig together, as you might see soon, MOST of the bikes were very cool.Anyway, I have to get the trailer and truck ready for their sea voyage back to Puerto Rico, so I will leave you guys with this short news and the promise of the full saga in Sturgis this year

–Jose

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY–“Life’s journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting “…holy shit…what a ride!”

–from Bob T.

STURGIS MOTORCYCLE HALL OF FAME–I had the privilege of attending the Sturgis Motorcycle Museum Hall Of Fame Induction Breakfast at the Holiday Inn in Spearfish South Dakota on August 11th to accept the award for Donald “Pappy” Pittsley who was inducted into their Freedom Fighters Hall Of Fame.

For those of you that do not know him he was one of the founders of Connecticut Motorcycle Rights back in the ’70s. He had his friend Representative Rufus Rose submit the Mandatory Helmet Law Repeal bill to the Connecticut legislature. He also was instrumental in having Senator Stu McKinney bring the CMAs complaint of blackmail by the NHTSA to the House Transportation Committee in Washington.

One thing that was not mentioned was that “Pappy” was a member of the HUNS MC in Bridgeport Connecticut. As President of the HUNS I supported Pappy’s efforts by supplying funds and also organizing Helmet Law Protests through out Connecticut.

Fighting the Mandatory Helmet Law was a long, grueling process that included numerous arrests and court battles. Pappy never got to see the law repealed as he died of a heart attack while arguing the merits of the repeal.

I resigned as President of the HUNS and took over CMA and the law was repealed shortly after that. Pappy gave his life so that the motorcycle riders of Connecticut and other states could have a freedom of choice on wearing motorcycle helmets.

There still is no mandatory helmet law in Connecticut for riders over 21 years of age. The freedom fighters of Connecticut continue to fight and refuse to let the bureaucrats re-instate the law. There is also a “Pappy Run” every year in the New London area of the State and 2005 marks the 30th year anniversary of the event.

Other inductees this year were Michael “Balls” Farabaugh of Indiana, Mark Buckner of Colorado and Ian Mutch of United Kingdom. The Sturgis Motorcycle Museum & Hall of Fame is located at Main Street and Junction Avenue, Sturgis South Dakota and I strongly recommend you stop in and see them next time you are in the area.

–ROGUE

THE FEMININE STEALTH REPORT–During my last report that appeared in the Sunday Post, I attempted to describe my feelings as I waited for Mike to come through surgery. I also attempted to explain how important the Stealthman is to me, and how he taught me about motorcycles, and what being a biker is all about.

This week he is still out of commission, recuperating from his back surgery, so once again the Stealth Report will be written by the me, the Meanest woman alive!

Stealthman is being a better patient than I thought he might be. He takes his drugs on time (yeah, he’s still on the good stuff!). He’s flat on his back 95% of the time and is getting bored, but he realizes that this is a small part of the big picture.

Speaking of the big picture, how many times do we all think of the big picture, to think past today? What does it take to get our attention –A life-threatening operation or accident? How about phone call in the middle of the night? Or can it be something subtle? How about the next time you hear the song you call “our song” call them and remind them about the first time you heard the song together. Why not greet your loved one with a smile the next time you see them? Try it, you might be amazed at the results!

A couple of years ago Stealthman and I took his dad to Waugh’s Harley-Davidson in Orange, Virginia for their annual bike show. That dealership knows how to produce a bike show! His dad was already in failing health at that time and was in a wheelchair. We covered the grounds, checking out the 200+ bikes in the show, then stopped for a bite to eat, checking out the live band.

Mike’s dad was a good, honest hardworking man who lived life hard and fast. Just like his son, he was a good-lookin? man. Too handsome for his own good, because he was irresistible to the ladies! Several years ago he was temporarily infatuated with another woman, and lost the true love of his life. He realized his mistake, but it was too late. His true love had moved on without him. The first time I ever met him he told me how he regretted losing her.

We stood by his wheelchair finishing up our lunch, and the band played “Desperado” by the Eagles. Mike and I moved silently to the music, sharing an intimate moment. Desperado became our song. Every time I hear that song I’m transported back to that very moment in time.

Mike’s dad has been gone for a while now. Mike and I have had our ups and downs, disappointments, trials and tribulations. We had planned a trip to Cancun in September as our honeymoon, but that has been delayed because of Mike’s surgery. Do I regret canceling our trip? As I realized the trip wasn’t going to happen, a tear trickled down my cheek. I was feeling pretty sorry for myself. I turned on the radio and “our song” was playing and it all came back to me. I suddenly realized I didn’t need a trip to Cancun or anywhere else, just the big picture? This is it!

When I go home tonight I?m going to remind Mike about that first time we heard “Desperado” together, and then I’m going to give him a big smile and him and tell him I love him. I bet I’ll be amazed at the results!

Thanks to all the Bikernet readers for all your good wishes for the Stealthman and his recovery. If all goes well he will back in his regular spot next week. Thanks for reading what I’ve had to say the past couple of weeks. It’s been a privilege!

Love and kisses,
–Meanest

Continued On Page 4

Continued From Page 1

CRAZYHORSE’S SAFE RETURN FROM BADLANDS–Jim and I pulled into our driveway at 6:30pm Monday night. We were gone 13days. The longest break I have taken from painting since 1999. I reallyneeded it. For me, Sturgis 2004 was a totally awesome trip.

We took six bikesout there. I had my gooseneck chopper and we brought a VRod bagger as abackup bike. I figured I’d spend some time on the gooseneck and some on theV. I rode the V around the parking lot of the Holiday Inn but that was aboutit. I got on my hardtail and rode the crap out of it. I hoped I would likemy new bike but I had no idea I would love it as much as I do. Jim put newsprings under the seat before we left. They are the springs used for ’94 copHarleys. They come in black so they looked perfect on the bike. And theyhave a much better ride than the ones I had on there.

The whole trip was onegreat adventure. But then I stayed away from the crowds, downtown after 9 p.m.,and did not go out to the big bars and campgrounds on Rt 34. I kept mydaytime speeds under 80 and under 55 at night, avoiding cops and deer. Therewere breakdowns, dramas, celebrity builders, too many shit-for-brains whohave no business on bikes, new friends, old friends, riding intoextraordinary sunsets, mystical night time rides, thrilling rides through thecanyons and riding in record setting cold temperatures. In short, there was alot of riding, at least for me. I’ve worked most of the bugs out of thegooseneck and it will soon be ready for some real riding trips. I’ll have myreport in sometime next week.

” My favorite bike at the bike shows, avery clean rigid from Twisted Choppers. No extra stuff, uncluttered, notoverdone, looks very ridable.”

–Crazy Horse

Don’t Dare Miss The”Texas Style Party Drags”–

Admission: $20 a head, Under 18 admitted with Parent ONLYGates Open: 4:pm – Time Trials 6:pm – Eleminations 8pmLocation: Exit 713 Beckendorf Road 5 miles west of Sealy on I-10, Information: www.texasscooter.com

“ITS GONNA BE A “GROWN UP”PARTY DRAGS !! – DON’T MISS IT!!

Red’s Already got 50 pounds of Mardi Gras Beads to “give away”…….

(BYOB – Bring Your Own Beads!! & Be There !!!!!!!!)

TBEAR SHIRTS FOR THE TROOPS–As a way of supporting our troops in Iraq, TBearWear.com just shipped over abunch of special shirts to our boys outside of Fallujah. We thought it wasthe very least we could do to show our support to our brave fighting men andwomen in Harm’s Way. We asked them to bring them and themselves back homesoon with no holes in them. Hopefully they will send a pic when they get thetime.

FIREFIGHTER-BIKER ALLIANCE–THIS TALE WILL BREAK YOUR HEART–My name is Chris DePaola and I am involved with a small organization named the “Firefighter-Biker Alliance”, located just outside of Chicago, Illinois. We are a small organization, comprised mostly of firefighters, dedicated to helping people in the Chicago-land area by providing financial assistance through our fundraising activities, as well as personal, hands-on support with the donated time of our volunteers. Currently, we are getting ready to host a major fundraiser on SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 25, 2004 for a very deserving family in Bridgeview, Illinois.

This event will benefit Rita Stevenson, the 27-year-old mother of three little boys, who has also been raising her three nieces for the past six years. This young woman has endured more hardship in the past several years than anyone should ever have to. Her first sister died in a tragic house fire, and a second sister lost her battle with cancer at the age of 31, leaving behind three pre-teen daughters. Her father suffered from diabetes, and after having had both of his legs amputated, he was bedridden and in need of constant attention. Rita did not hesitate to step up and take responsibility for his care, cleaning and dressing his wounds and tending to his daily needs, until he passed away two years ago.

After her Dad died, Rita tried hard, but wasn’t able to keep up with the financial obligations of the family home, and the six children she was now raising alone, and she lost the house to foreclosure. But, it is within the last two months that this story gets even worse. After collapsing at her job last month, where she worked twelve-hour days trying to make ends meet, Rita was diagnosed with a large pituitary tumor in her brain that will require a craniotomy to remove. That brain surgery had been scheduled, but then cancelled, when another tragedy devastated this family.

Two weeks ago, Beckie, the youngest of the three nieces being raised by Rita, was killed in an ATV accident at the age of 16. It’s hard to comprehend how anyone could suffer through all of this and survive, but Rita has been unbelievably courageous. With no time to grieve yet another horrific loss, she must now try to ready herself and her family for her upcoming surgery. As you can imagine, their current financial state is not good, and we anticipate that the situation will only degrade as Rita has not been able to work since discovering the tumor, and will not be able to return to work for several months after her brain surgery. We are hoping to ease her burden just a little so that she can go into this challenge with a positive outlook and attitude.

This is where YOU come in! On SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 25, 2004 we will be holding a large “Motorcycle Poker-Run”, in conjunction with a Pig Roast, to help raise funds for this family so desperately in need.

Christopher R. DePaola
Firefighter-Biker Alliance
2317 Scott Lane
Aurora, Il 60504
(630) 803-4963

NEWS FROM WHITEHORSE PRESS–You may have seen the interview on the CBS program 48 HOURS with adventuremotorcyclist Glen Heggstad, or heard parts of his hair-raising story onNational Public Radio. But nothing compares to reading his new book, TWOWHEELS THROUGH TERROR. Here is the full story of his ride to the southerntip of South America only weeks after the terrorist attacks of September 11,2001, when on a mountainous road between Medellin and Bogota, he wascaptured by Colombia’s rebel ELN army. For five weeks, he was moved fromcamp to camp, beaten, fed only small amounts of rice and water, andcontinuously threatened with death. Having survived and won his release –and, above all, determined to finish the journey he started — Heggstadcontinued his trip-of-a-lifetime around the coast of South America,returning home to chronicle all of it with humor and insight. A fascinatingtravelog in the tradition of first-hand accounts like Krakauer’s INTO THINAIR, it will keep you riveted from beginning to end. Order yourfirst-edition copy while they last.

TWO WHEELS THROUGH TERROR, by Glen Heggstad, 275 pages, hardcover, colorillustrations, item code W-TWTT, $24.95
http://www.whitehorsepress.com

THE BIKERIDERS, by Danny Lyon, 121 pages, 72 b/w & color photographs, now ina new paperback edition, item code W-BRSS, $22.95

These are the famous photographs that launched a counterculture into thepublic consciousness. Includes 15 previously unpublished b/w photos and 14previously unknown color photos.

http://www.whitehorsepress.com

KRASH SAYS —Hey Bandit, Concrete Pete said something about a secret tattoo. I wouldn’t usually want peopleto use work I consider original, but I might make an exception. Just use the “pissin’gator”. doesn’thave to be secret, just visible.

Krash.

SHA SHA SUMMER SELECTION–Sha Sha Fine Shoes, Inc., a manufacturer of alternative styled footwear for men and women, has launched their first line of EVA sandals for men and women this summer.

The designs cater to the motorcycle and powersports industry mainly with cool graphics like pin stripes, racing stripes, racing checkerboards and skull and crossbones. The sandals are available at dealers throughout the U.S., including many motorcycle shops, and are available direct to consumers on Sha Sha?s website as well.

For more information about the new sandals, or any other products available from Sha Sha, visit the Sha Sha Fine Shoes website at http:// www.sha-sha.com, email info@sha-sha.com, or call 1-877-3-SHA-SHA.

Continued On Page 3

It’s Thursday again, damnit! What the hell am I doing? The hole in my mouth, where the tooth hung out, is healing. Cyril Huze sent me an old racing aluminum Sportster Tank from the XR 750 era. According to Frank Kaisler it may hold 2.75 gallons. Just a minute ago I held it up to he frame. We’ll see. It’s a strange, yet old school element for this monster. I can’t wait to mock it up and ask Tim Conder to draw a concept illustration that will bring the whole project to life. This weekend we plan to add more Samson mufflers to our shop railing. I need to take a couple of shots that don’t promote my shitty welds. Let’s hit the news:

THE LATEST FROM SCOTT JACOBS–The amazing aspect of Jacobs work is that it is always refreshing and vibrant. Here are his latest paintings authorized for general release by the Motor Co. Each is a strictly limited edition and in small numbers thereby adding to their exclusivity. You now are dealing directly through the artist?s studio with all of the inherent advantages.

Have a look at these and I would be happy to answer any questions you have.

— Ron
866-985-9989

COUPLE OF ITEMS TO OFFEND– Why is Chelsea Clinton so homely?Because Janet Reno is her real father.

What do you call a smart blonde?A golden retriever. OUCH, that even hurt me.

What do attorneys use for birth control?Their personalities. They had that one coming.

–from Skooter

LOWERED TOURING MODELS–I have been recently reading up on this itemon the web site attached above, it is supposed to lower touring bikesby 1 1/4 – 1 1/2 inches depending on the bike: http://www.solowmotorcycles.com/.My question is have you heard about thisand if so have you guys tested it for durability etcor would you endorse this product or is this a good idea?

I am thinking of putting it on my Road Glide(I have short legs) but I do not want to waste my timeand bucks on something not worth while.

–TonyWe warned Tony about fender clearance and turning problem, if he lowered his bike too far. The factory offers lowered shocks for the rear and kits for the front. I also suggested a lower, narrower seat.–Bandit

THINK YOU’RE HAVING A BAD DAY–Two animal rights defenders were protesting the cruelty of sendingpigs to a slaughterhouse in Bonn, Germany. Suddenly, all twothousand pigs broke loose and escaped through a broken fence,stampeding madly. The two helpless protesters were trampled to death.

What?? STILL having a Bad Day????

Iraqi terrorist Khay Rahnajet didn’t pay enough postage on a letterbomb. It came back with “Return to Sender” stamped on it.Forgetting it was the bomb, he opened it and was blown to bits. There now, feeling better?????

–from Skooter

BIKERNET HEALTH WARNING–Don’t Mix Beer with Viagra.

–from Bob T.

Subject: The Pit Crew– The Ferrari Formula 1 Team fired their entire pit crew last month. Theannouncement followed Ferrari’s decision to abide by extreme pressure fromworld governments that the racing industry hire more minorities. As aresult, 12 youths from south central Los Angeles were now an essential partof the famous Formula 1 Team. The decision to hire them was brought on by arecent documentary on how unemployed youths from the Watts area were able toremove a set of wheels in less than 6 seconds with just a tire iron andscrewdriver, whereas Ferrari’s existing crew could only do it in 8 secondswith a million dollars worth of high tech equipment.It was thought to be an excellent, yet bold move, by the Ferrari managementsince most races are won and lost in the pits. Ferrari believed they wouldhave an advantage over every team. However, Ferrari got more than theybargained for. At the crew’s first practice session, not only were theWatts pit crew able to change the tires in under 6 seconds, but within 12seconds they had re-sprayed, re-badged, and sold the vehicle to the Williamsteam for two six packs of Colt 45, a day’s supply of crack and photos ofQueen Latifah in the shower.

–from Buckshot

REBEL’S NEW PROJECT ON BIKERNET–Watch a full blown Buell as it’s wedged into an Atlas Sportster frame. There are two segments currently posted in the new Bikernet Sportster department.

COOL LUBRICATION FROM NARLEY’S– NARLEY’S OIL COOLERS can provide all the parts for reducing engine oil temperature – a problem that becomes serious when a bike is used in heavy traffic and even worse when the weather is warm.

Of 0.020 inch stainless steel construction, the cooler is designed to follow the lines of the frame, resulting in a neat appearance and without disrupting the vital air flow to the engine.

Conducting the heat away is a continuous spiral fin, furnace brazed to the tube at eight-turns-per-inch. An internal turbulator rotates the column of oil every two inches to even the cooling process.

With 9/32 inch ports, the cooler can pass a 26 per cent greater flow than the stock lubrication system.

Narley’s coolers are supplied complete with a fitting kit, featuring a fail-safe thermovalve, hose and universal mountings.

This stainless steel unit measures 1 inch in diameter and is 2 7/8 inch long, the ports are 9/32 inch diameter for increased flow. The thermovalve has etched port identification to help ensure the valve is correctly fitted.

Narley’s can also supply hose fittings, which are made from 304 stainless steel and tested to 150 psi. They are supplied with a polished finish.

NARLEY’S OIL COOLERS
Oroville, California, USA
Tel: 877 627 5397
E-mail: michl@cncnet.com
http://www.narleys.com

SCREAMIN’ EAGLE DRAG TEAM BATTLES IN BRAINERD–Andrew Hines Makes Semi-Final Elimination Round, Retains Pro Stock Bike Points Lead.

Screamin’ Eagle/Vance & Hines drag racing team riders GT Tonglet and Andrew Hines advanced in the Pro Stock Bike elimination rounds of the 23rd Annual Lucas Oil NHRA Nationals at Brainerd International Raceway. Hines rode his Screamin? Eagle V-Rod to the semi-final round for the third consecutive NHRA event and maintained his lead in overall Pro Stock Bike season points.

Both Hines and Tonglet were among the quickest qualifiers at Brainerd. Hines was the number two qualifier with a run of 7.107 seconds at 188.52 mph and set the top-speed mark for the event. Tonglet qualified fourth at 7.133/187.94. Antron Brown claimed the top qualifying spot with a 7.091/187.52 pass.

Hines extended his perfect record in the first round of eliminations this season with a run of 7.143/187.18 to beat Kurt Matte, who broke at the starting line. Tonglet (7.158/185.36) defeated Blaine Hale (7.387/182.53), as both Screamin? Eagle riders advanced to round two.

In the second round, Tonglet used a 0.025-second reaction time to beat Angelle Savoie (0.076) off the line, but Tonglet?s engine expired as he rode away from the start and his day was over. The result was an easy recovery and win for Savoie (7.135/185.74). Hines used an outstanding reaction time of 0.012 seconds and a run of 7.202/186.36 to beat Geno Scali (0.070 reaction time, 7.190/185.43) and advance to the semi-final round.

Hines faced red-hot Craig Treble in round three and beat him off the line, 0.024 to 0.033, but then had his engine bog and watched as Treble (7.336/183.97) passed him for the win. Hines finished his run with a time of 7.601/157.10.

?For the first time this season, mechanical problems beat both of our riders,? said Harley-Davidson Racing Manager Anne Paluso. ?The Screamin? Eagle team has delivered amazing consistency and reliability in 2004 giving our riders the ability to be contenders at each event. We?re still leading the season in points and we?ll be back in Memphis.?

Treble (7.199/183.00) defeated Savoie (7.395/150.10) after the former champion had to roll off the throttle when her bike drifted toward the center barricade.

Hines remains the leader in NHRA Pro Stock Bike season points. After 10 of 15 rounds, Hines leads with 886 points, 192 points ahead of Shawn Gann, in second with 694 points. The surging Savoie is right on Gann?s heels, in third with 689 points. Treble moves up to fourth place with 682 points, followed by Brown with 651 points and Tonglet with 587 points.

The next Pro Stock Bike event on the NHRA POWERade Drag Racing Series is the 17th AnnualO’Reilly Mid-South NHRA Nationals, Aug. 20-22, at Memphis Motorsports Park in Millington, Tenn.

Screamin’ Eagle Performance Parts are inspired by and built in the spirit of the raw adrenaline and power of motorcycle racing. Screamin’ Eagle Pro parts are specifically designed for race-use applications, while Screamin’ Eagle parts offer street-use performance options for the Harley-Davidson motorcycle owner. Visit www.harley-davidson.com for more information.

The Screamin’ Eagle/Vance & Hines Pro Stock Bike team is sponsored by Dunlop, Ford Quality Checked Certified Pre-Owned, Matco Tools and S100.

BUELL RACERS JEFF JOHNSON AND JOSH GUYER PODIUM AT BARBER–Yaakov Wins; Other Title Contenders Falter at Formula USA Thunderbike National. Hoban Brothers/Appleton Buell rider Jeff Johnson and Harley-Davidson of Bloomington?s Josh Guyer finished on the podium at the Formula USA National Thunderbike race at Barber Motorsports Park. Harding Harley-Davidson?s Bryan Bemisderfer saw his championship points lead in the Thunderbike series shrink after a mechanical problem forced him to retire from the race. Hal?s Buell rider Dan Bilansky, who was second in points coming into the race at Barber, also failed to finish, as did Bemisderfer?s teammate and defending Thunderbike champion, David Estok. The race was won by CAD Racing Suzuki rider David Yaakov.

?We may not have had the best lap times, but our bike worked flawlessly all weekend,? said Johnson. ?I?ve got to give credit to Mike Arrington of Revolution Performance and to John Dahmer and the entire Hoban Brothers team. Their work allowed me to focus on my riding.?

?I got a good start from the back of the grid and worked my way up to Jeff, but I was pretty worn out when I got there. I didn?t even know it was for the podium,? said Guyer. ?Jeff Stevens and the Harley-Davidson of Bloomington crew, especially Joe Stines, have given me a great bike and we?re really making progress.?

A scoring computer malfunction during qualifying forced Formula USA officials to grid the race based on season points, giving Bemisderfer the pole position, but relegating other riders with few season points to the back. It was a break for the Thunderbike championship leader, who tangled with teammate Estok early in the 15-minute qualifying session, causing both riders to fall.

Despite his disappointing weekend, Bemisderfer still leads the Thunderbike National series with 85 points. Yaakov moves from fourth to second with 67 points, now just 18 points behind Bemisderfer, and Johnson moves to third with 61 points. The next stop on the Formula USA National Thunderbike Series is Sept. 17-19 at Las Vegas Motor Speedway in Las Vegas, Nev.

The Formula USA National Thunderbike series is a horsepower-to-weight ratio restricted class, open to a variety of production-based motorcycles. Buell-mounted riders competing in the eight-event 2004 Thunderbike series are racing for a share of the $70,500 contingency fund posted by Buell Motorcycle Company and Buell Riders Adventure Group (BRAG).

Continued On Page 2

Continued From Page 3

HAVING A BAD DAY?–Having a Bad Day? In a hospital’s Intensive Care Unit, patients always died in thesame bed, on Sunday morning, at about 11:00 a.m., regardless oftheir medical condition.

This puzzled the doctors and some even thought it had something todo with the supernatural. No one could solve the mystery as to whythe deaths occurred around 11:00 a.m. on Sunday, so a worldwideteam of experts was assembled to investigate the cause of theincidents.

The next Sunday morning, a few minutes before 11:00 a.m., all ofthe doctors and nurses nervously waited outside the ward to see forthemselves what the terrible phenomenon was all about. Some wereholding wooden crosses, prayer books, and other holy objects toward off the evil spirits.

Just when the clock struck 11:00, Pookie Johnson, the part-timeSunday sweeper, entered the ward and unplugged the life supportsystem so he could use the vacuum cleaner.

–from Skooter

Composed By Panhead Josh Of Outlaws World.

BIKERNET ETIQUETTE–A couple was dressed and ready to go out for the evening. They turned on anight-light, turned the answering machine on the phone line, covered theirpet parakeet and put the cat in the backyard. They phoned the local cabcompany and requested a taxi. The taxi arrived and the couple opened thefront door to leave their house.

The cat they had put out into the yard scoots back into the house. Theydon’t want the cat shut in the house because she always tries to eat thebird. The wife goes out to the taxi while the husband goes inside to get thecat. The cat runs upstairs, the man in hot pursuit.

Waiting in the cab, the wife doesn’t want the driver to know the house willbe empty for the night. She explains to the taxi driver that her husbandwill be out soon.

“He’s just going upstairs to say good-bye to my mother.”

A few minutes later, the husband gets into the cab. “Sorry I took solong,” he says, as they drive away. “Stupid bitch was hiding under the bed.Had to poke her with a coat hanger to get her to come out! She tried totake off so I grabbed her by the neck. Then I had to wrap her in a blanketto keep her from scratching me. But it worked. I hauled her fat assdownstairs and threw her out into the back yard!”

The cabdriver hit a parked car…

–from Skooter

BIKERNET STURGIS SIDEBAR–Met these people and the parents each rode one of the kids and the son just got his license.

–Rogue

NEW AUTO STEREO SYSTEM– A woman bought a new Luxury Automobile, and returned the next day, complaining that she couldn’t figure out how the radio worked.

Thesalesman explained that the radio was voice activated. “Watch this! “he said…”Nelson!” The radio replied, “Ricky or Willie?” “Willie!” he continued….and “On The Road Again” came from the speakers.

The womandrove away happy, and for the next few days, every time she’d say,”Beethoven”, she’d get beautiful classical music, and if she said, “Beatles!” she’dget one of their awesome songs. One day, a couple ran a red light and nearly creamed her new car,but she swerved in time to avoid them.

“ASSHOLES!” she yelled……

The French National Anthem began to play, sung by the Dixie Chicks….

–from Skooter

STURGIS RALLY QUESTIONNAIRE– The city of Sturgis wants to get to know the thousands of bikers who visit the town each year for the Sturgis Motorcycle Rally, and it’s using technology to get the job done.

For the first time in rally history, participants may register via computer. Three kiosks of nine computers are located at Lazelle and Main streets, the main drags of Sturgis.

“We were missing out on creating a list that would be of value to the event,” said Sturgis Mayor Mark Zeigler. “Tourism is an ever-changing industry, and we have to keep abreast.”

Zeigler said Snap-On Inc., an automotive tools company based in Kenosha, Wis., volunteered to create the computer program and provide the hardware, saving the city about $40,000. In exchange, Snap-On will receive information about registered rallygoers such as the brands of bikes they ride and their income levels.

Scott Ramsey, e-commerce developer with Snap-On, said that as of Monday evening, 3,600 rallygoers had registered. Rally officials estimate 500,000 people are attending the 64th annual rally.

Participants enter their names, mailing addresses, phone numbers and e-mail addresses. They are given the option to answer questions regarding their income, hobbies and the types of motorcycles they ride in order to win a prize from Snap-On.

“The chicks really dig a guy who’s registered,” joked Brad Clausen of Colorado Springs, Colo. “Seriously, I’m registering for the free stuff.”

–Monica Labelle, Argus Leader

–from Rogue

BIKERNET POLITICAL INVESTIGATION–Senator Hillary Clinton was attending a party, when she noticed Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger. She walked over to him, and in a quiet voice said; “If you were my husband I would poison your drink.”

Schwarzenegger smiled, leaned forward, and whispered in her ear,”And if you were my wife I would drink it!”

–from Skooter

SUPER MAX BELT DRIVES– has a history of belt drive expertise that pre-dates Harley-Davidson adopting the method for OEM transmission.Principal Phil Ross offered belt drive conversions for Harley-Davidson using a development of a Gates Kevlar-reinforced belt, originally intended for snowmobiles.

A range of conversion kits has been developed and is on offer, but the latest news from Super Max claims a unique service, an overlay pulley that will fit most OEM and aftermarket pulleys.Many of these aluminum items are worn out after mileages as low as 15,000.The teeth become sharpened, the pitch is lost and belt wear becomes rapid.

The overlay process involves turning the worn out teeth from the pulley and reducing it in diameter until the correct fit is achieved for the ‘poly-tooth’ overlay.In use, the overlay remains unaffected by dust and small debris.The conversion is also quieter running than the stock arrangement.

It is said that if the correct tension and alignment are maintained, the Super Max poly pulley may well outlast the rest of the motorcycle.Overlays are usually offered in black, but there are options of many other colors.

As well as the usual 65- or 70-teeth overlays, there are alternative ratios for primary and final drives for Big Twins and a choice of final drives for Sportster models.The overlay can be supplied alone, but Super Max points out that a large lathe will be necessary to perform the conversion.

Specialty drives are also offered for chain-drive FXRs and FLTs.

With its conversions, Super Max still supplies and fits Gates Poly-chain belts.

SUPER MAX BELT DRIVES
Kalispell, Montana, USA
Tel: 406 755 8688
E-mail: supermax@supermax.net
www.supermax.net

BASSINI ?05 POWER CURVE– There?s no disputing the facts, Bassani?s new true dual POWER CURVE crossover system outperforms the competition hands down. Now available for ?2005? models exclusively from North County Customs, each POWER CURVE system is a direct bolt-on replacement for stock head pipes.

Designed to achieve proper port angle and tuned rear pipe length, the POWER CURVE offers improved low end torque, high tech appearance and a unique exhaust note. POWER CURVE pipes are fabricated from 16 gauge steel, finished in rugged, show quality chrome and are supplied with custom designed heat shields.

For a total custom package complete your POWER CURVE exhaust system with a set of Bassani?s revolutionary slip-on mufflers. The Bassani POWER CURVE retails for $449.00.

For additional details call 866-439-4287 or catch the full Bassani line at www.northcountycustoms.com.

THAT’S IT–My entire face is throbbing. I’m going to drink an entire bottle of Jack and shoot myself. No shit, I want to work on my new project. Some CCI parts arrived today.

Since I’m not worth the powder to blow me to hell, let’s end this with a goddamn wedding. Scooter and his lovely wife tied the chain belt and rode to Sturgis. They’re in the Black Hill right now playing the honeymoon rock.

If you see them hanging on a street corner, give them my very best and tell ’em to get the wedding vows tattooed on their arms, so when they’re pissed they can remind themselves of the initial agreement.

I can’t take anymore fun like this. I can’t drink the Jack according to the Doctor’s orders, so I’ll smack myself with the bottle. Have a helluva weekend and bring all the riders home safe from Sturgis.

Ride Forever,

–Bandit

Continued From Page 2

CONDEROSA FILES–Here’s a message to all you nice folks who may have been getting e-mails from me containing rambling stories or pictures of my work. The stories are written for http://www.Bikernet.com and the pictures are to let the folks out there know what I do for a livin’. Feel free to forward them to anyone you think may be interested in having some work done.

Otherwise give everybody you see a big hug from all of us at the Conderosa Ranch. – Friendliness, Tim and Alyssa

* Just finished – “DXP” a.k.a “Copperhead”, a hand built Lucky’s Chopper out of Seattle.

* In progress – “Orange Crash” – a hot rod FXD out of Sonoma.

* Loose paint shop renderings of a possible Conder Custom, “Chop Suey”. (I scratch ’em out on my masking paper while waiting between paint coats) Copyright Conder Capeesh?

Tim Conder will soon draw the Ultimate Chopper Concept Drawing for the next Bikernet project bikes. It’s a class way to kick off any project and keep the fires burning around the tool box. Conder Custom – (707) 843-9554

The Conderosa

WHAT MAKES A CHOPPER A CHOPPER–It seems that everyone today got themselves caught up in the Chopper frenzy. Thanks to the Discovery Channel’s targeted programming, every little kid in America strives not to be President or even a doctor or lawyer but a rootin’ tootin’ bad ass biker. Unfortunately, some of their daddy’s think the same way. With the past decades rise in disposable income, an entire mega-money making industry has given rise to the re-birth of the chopper craze of the 60’s and early 70’s. You see them on magazine covers at the supermarket check out stands, you see them on television commercials and you even saw them at the Super Bowl, but, did you really see Choppers? NOPE.

What you saw in most instances were not Choppers at all but custom built motorcycles. They look pretty with their long stretched front ends, fancy paint jobs that glow in the dark and sporting enough chrome do-hickeys to make a blind man put on a pair of sun glasses but they’re NOT CHOPPERS. You really can’t blame the hundreds of makers of these sweet customs that have sprung up in the past few years for calling them Choppers though. The English language, it would seem, has adopted the term for any bike that doesn’t look like it came fresh out of the dealership, and most buyers really don’t know the difference, but I’ll attempt to explain it to you here.

It started in the 1940’s when servicemen returning from WWII were looking for a thrill. After seeing the world and a whole bunch of action, the Veterans were looking to add a little weekend excitement to their seemingly dull post-war lives. Motorcycles were the perfect venue for them. They bought up surplus military bikes but found all the weight just a bit too restrictive so they chopped away all the unnecessary do-dads like windshields and saddlebags. Then in an effort to make the bikes a bit lighter and handle better all the unnecessary weight was also chopped off. Rear fenders were “bobbed” to just enough to handle a passenger and keep the rain and mud coming off the rear wheel from hitting them in the back and front fenders were done away with completely.

This type of home done customization led to the rise of the “bobber”. Then in the ’60s, some enterprising individual came up with the notion that a longer front end was cool. Well, that was the birth of the Girder and Springer front ends. I have to tell you that after riding these type front ends for years that they do look cool but reduce handling of the bike greatly. If you’ve ever tried making a tight U-turn or running at high speeds on some twisty mountain roads with one of these you’ll know just what I’m talking about. Degree of neck rake and the length of the front end have been carefully considered by motorcycle manufactures for years for a purpose. HANDLING.

OK, so what makes a Chopper a Chopper? Well, technically, you don’t “build a Chopper”. To make a bike a true Chopper you have to start off with an unmodified factory bike and chop the hell out of it. Take off every piece of crap that has no function in making the bike either go or stop and toss it into a pile. Then you take out the engine and transmission and get to work cutting up the factory frame and welding it back together to get it lower and lighter. The true function of a Chopper is to make it as fast and as maneuverable as possible. Jesse James, the most infamous of the television “Chopper Builders” said it best ” I have always thought that if it doesn’t make it go fast or stop fast , it shouldn’t be there”.

A rigid frame is a must for a Chopper. You don’t need no stinkin’ shock absorbers or a Softail frame on a Chopper. They serve no function other than making the ride a bit more comfortable and if you want comfort, you don’t want a Chopper. You want a custom built bar hopper and if that’s what you’re into, it’s fine with me but it you can jump up and down and explain till you’re blue in the face, but it ain’t a Chopper. Listen, it’s made to ride and ride hard.

Bottom Line: It’s YOUR ride and don’t let anyone try and sell you a bill of goods with that “it has to be a Harley crap”. T’ain’t so McGee. I can’t believe that I’m gonna quote Shakespeare here but it fits:”TO THINE OWN SELF, BE TRUE”. Screw everyone else. You’re the one riding it.

–TBear

WHAT MAKES A BIKERNET FARMER A FARMER–A man walked into a quiet bar. He carried three ducks, one in each hand and one under his left arm.He placed them one beside the other upon the bar.

He had a few drinks and chatted with the ducks, and with the bartender. The bartender was surprised, but experienced and had learned not to ask people about animals they bring into the bar, so he didn’t mention the ducks.

They chatted for about another 30 minutes before the man with the ducks had to go to the restroom. He left the ducks there on the bar, leaving the bartender alone with the ducks.

There was an awkward silence as they all looked at one another. The bartender decided to break the ice and try to make a little conversation.

“Say, what’s your name?” he asked the first duck.

“Huey,” replied the first duck.

“How’s your day been, Huey?”

“Great. Lovely day. Had a ball. Been in and out of puddles all day!”

“What else could a duck want?” said the duck.

“Oh. That’s nice,” said the bartender. Then he said to the second duck, “Hi. And what’s your name?”

“Dewey,” came the answer from duck number two.

“So how’s your day been, Dewey?”, he asked.

“Great. Lovely day. I’ve had a ball too! Been in and out of puddles all day myself. If I had the chance another day I’d do the same again!”, said the duck in reply.

So, the bartender turned to the third duck and said, “So, you must be Louie?”

“No,” she said, “my name is Puddles.”

“And don’t even ask what kind of day I’ve had!”

–from David McGraw

GET A FREE EXHAUST SYSTEM AND HELP A BIKE MANUFACTURER– The first 700 people who finish the questionaire, by clicking on this banner, will be entered into a drawing for a FREE set of Harley Davidson v-twin pipes of their choice (up to $700 retail value).

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–Bandit

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SCREAMIN? EAGLE FLAT TRACK TEAM THIRD IN IOWA GRAND NATIONAL–King Scores Podium Finish on Farley Half-Mile. FARLEY, Iowa (Aug. 7, 2004) ? Screamin? Eagle Performance Parts rider Rich King claimed third place before his home-state fans when the AMA Progressive Insurance Flat Track Championship made a stop at the challenging clay half-mile track at the Farley Speedway in northeast Iowa.

King, a native of Dysart, Iowa, won his qualifying heat race aboard his Screamin? Eagle Harley-Davidson XR750, and started the 25-lap Grand National main in fourth position. He ran as high as second place before being passed on lap 15 by KTM USA/Jones Powersports/Mid-America Harley-Davidson rider Kenny Coolbeth. King then held off a late-race charge by Lancaster Harley-Davidson/Saddlemen rider Jared Mees. Chris Carr, riding for the Quality Checked Pre-Owned Ford/Lancaster Harley-Davidson team, led from the pole and was never threatened as he cruised to his fourth win of the season.

?The Screamin? Eagle team really looked great tonight, and I know Rich was excited to be racing for the podium in front of his home state fans,? said Harley-Davidson Racing Manager Anne Paluso. ?The team has been up and down this year, but hopefully we can carry this momentum into the second half of the season.?

After nine of 18 races on the AMA Progressive Insurance Flat Track Championship schedule, Carr enjoys a 29-point lead over KTM USA/Jones Powersports/Mid-America Harley-Davidson rider Joe Kopp and is 42 points clear of Coolbeth in third. King sits in 13th place.

The next stop on the AMA Progressive Insurance Flat Track Championship series is August 10 at Black Hills Speedway in Rapid City, S.D.

VICTORY PARTNERS WITH S&S FOR PERFORMANCE– Victory Teams Up With S&S Cycle, Inc. to Fuel Development of Victory Performance ProductsV-Twin Aftermarket Leader to Introduce High-Performance 106-Cubic Inch Kit for Victory Freedom Engines

MEDINA, MN (Aug. 5, 2004) – To satisfy the power and performance desiresof its customers, Victory Motorcycles has teamed up with the leadingaftermarket source for American V-twin performance equipment, S&S Cycle,Inc. in an alliance that will result in development of high-performanceengine components for Victory motorcycles.

Victory, the motorcycle division of Polaris Industries Inc., willprovide the S&S Cycle product development team with technicalinformation about Victory Freedom(tm) V-Twin engines as well as advancedinformation about new Victory products. This will allow them to design,test and produce performance equipment for Victory motorcycles in themost timely fashion.

STURGIS REPORTS FLYING IN– Starting The Day Off Right. Having a good breakfast is important if you want to ride and party all day. I start mine off with a 20 mile ride through the Vanocker canyon to the Fire Department in Nemo South Dakota.

I stop there for their all you can eat breakfast and then just relax. I strongly suggest you try them if you like a lot to eat and do not want to wait in long lines.

The Fire Department is located on Nemo Road and Breakfast is served daily during the rally from 7:00 to 11:00 A.M. All You Can Eat For ONLY $6.00

Check them out and ask for Kathy. Tell her I sent you.

–ROGUE

STURGIS VENDORS CATER TO REBELLIOUS SIDE–South Dakota’s largest party has growled to life in true biker style – by pushing the boundaries.The 64th Annual Sturgis Motorcycle Rally officially began on Sunday, but bikers from across the nation began arriving on Aug. 2, three days earlier than their 2003 arrival, said Lisa Weyer, director of the rally.

Two-wheeled behemoths cruised over sidewalks for a position on Lazelle Street on Sunday morning and packed the main drag to a standstill in the late afternoon. Sturgis Rally News anticipates more than 400,000 people, though as of Sunday, Weyer had no official count.

No matter the count, it’s a vendor’s paradise. Gawkers filled sidewalks in awe of gleaming chrome, glossy rides and corn dogs. A line snaked out the door of a Sturgis sandwich shop at noon on Sunday. The city’s finance office reported 804 vendor licenses had been issued. Last year, 848 were issued, from which $14.8 million was made in taxable sales.

But Sturgis’s draw still lies in its rebellious image, said Bob Nugent, who rode his Harley-Davidson to Sturgis from San Diego. “Everybody wants to be a bad boy. It’s like Halloween.”

All the striving for individuality, though, creates bikes that are increasingly becoming the same, Nugent says. “They’re stamping them out of a cookie cutter,” he said.

As for the tough-looking rear fat tires? “That’s gettin’ old. That’s gettin’ passe,” he said.

But there’s still head-turning styles at Sturgis. Leather chaps worn sans pants have been spotted on Lazelle Street. Bike wheels laden with playing cards and a cycle with detailed paintings of Yoko Ono and Jimi Hendrix are on display. Say the magic word, and the design that dreams are made of may be airbrushed onto a helmet or bike.

“These are people wanting to get away,” said Chaz Cooney, a salesman at Real World Power, which sells cylinders and pistons for Harley-Davidsons. “People need some escape. Some way to be different.”

And after investing on average $6,000 for a macho fat rear tire, bikes become babies as well as escapes. Cooney says bikers are likely to be courteous drivers on the clogged roads of the Black Hills because they’ve invested so much time and money that they can’t afford to lose their vehicle. “You’re not talking about their Harley. You’re talking about their kid,” he said.

But for actor Kevin Costner, the type of bike he rode at his Sunday afternoon charity rally was a minor detail. “It’s a really black, big shiny Harley,” the actor said. “There’s some details that I just don’t care about.”

Costner then led 200 motorcyclists on a ride from the Community Events Center in Sturgis to Tatanka, north of Deadwood, in an effort to raise money for college scholarships for Black Hills State University and Tatanka: Story of the Bison, a center he created to raise awareness of the relationship between Native Americans and buffalo. Each participant paid $125.

“The idea that we’re raising money for someone to go to college feels kind of good,” Costner said.

His celebrity appearance is one of many this week, with The Beach Boys, B.B. King and Kid Rock scheduled to perform.Christopher Coppola of Los Angeles came to Sturgis for the first time to join Costner’s ride and raise awareness of Native American culture.”The world right now … there’s so much destruction,” he said. “Native American culture teaches you harmony with your surroundings. We can learn a lot from Native American culture.”

–Argus leader.

–from Rogue

STURGIS SUING STURGIS–Attorneys made their opening statements Thursday morning in the Federal District Court lawsuit pitting the city of Sturgis and the Sturgis Area Chamber of Commerce against Sturgis Rally & Races and Sturgis Bike Week, Inc.

Judge Karen Schreier presided at the hearing. Attorney Michael Reynolds of Rapid City represented the city and the chamber, while lawyer Michael Hickey of Rapid City attorney represented Sturgis Rally & Races and Sturgis Bike Week, Inc.

Schreier said the scope of this hearing was very narrow. She said she did not want to rehash the original lawsuit, but instead would determine if a court order — a permanent injunction issued in May 2000 — was being followed.

At issue in 2000 was the use of the year and the words “60th annual” in conjunction with Sturgis Bike Week. Attorney Reynolds told the court that Sturgis Bike week continues to use “64th annual” and 1938 (the year the motorcycle rally first began) in its promotional materials. The items include T-shirts, mugs and magazine publicity.

“The Rally is in its 64th year, but Sturgis Bike Week is not,” Reynolds argued. He also pointed out that in their magazine, Sturgis Bike Week makes “60-some” references to Sturgis Bike Week as the event. Reynolds complained this is an improper use of a trademark and that the name of the event is the Sturgis Motorcycle Rally.

Hickey said it was his clients’ understanding under the court order they were not allowed to use a long list of names for the event, including Sturgis Rally and that’s why they use Sturgis Bike Week in referring to the event.

–The Black Hills Pioneer, Newspaper

–from Rogue

CYRIL HUZE MINI SPIKEE MIRRORS– Cyril Huze offers mirrors with a minimalist look working very well on radical bikes & choppers.These mirrors can be installed on the hand controls with short stems, or at the end of the grip on one of the 3 grip designs also offered by Cyril Huze.Original design design featuring a bezel with three spikes and an enclosed glass with no risk of falling off because of vibrations.

Cyril Huze
Tel: 561-392-5557
Fax: 561-392-9923
http://www.cyrilhuze.com

HOW TO TELL THE SEX OF A FLY–A woman walked into the kitchen to find her husband stalking around witha fly swatter.

“What are you doing?” She asked.

“Hunting Flies” He responded.

“Oh. Killing any?” She asked.

“Yep, 3 males, 2 Females,” he replied.

Intrigued, she asked. “How can you tell?”

He responded:”3 were on a beer can, 2 were on the phone.”

–from Rodan

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