Where to start? Let’s start with saying this is another failed attempt to emulate Easy Rider but with a supposed humorous twist. Two bikers getting ready to head off to Sturgis, but they get side-tracked when one of them tries to save a dude being robbed by a couple punks, or as Keith Ball (as himself) playing a reporter, calls them, “Goons.”
After the heroics the hero is presented with his dead father’s Pan, a wishbone framed basket case, with the Easy Rider Captain America paint job and all from his mother who has stored it for decades.
With only three days to put the bike together and get on the road, a bunch of biker friends are called in to save the day. Three days later he’s rolling out but not on his dad’s wishbone Pan. He’s riding an Evo powered aftermarket, Softail frame but it does have a raked front end and the Captain America paint. His buddy is riding a newer Indian that is red but no yellow flames like the bike Hopper rode in the film; thank you for small favors.
So back to the road trip. They’re starting their trip from what seems to be Arizona. They’re not wearing helmets, but it appears they forgot to pack anything besides their handlebar rolls although at least one bike, the Indian, has a very small set of leather bags. This is important information later.
Unbeknownst to them they’re being chased by a couple completely inept hit men (think Laurel & Hardy here) going back to a stupid subplot of the movie. Along the way much, like Fonda’s character in Easy Rider, the hero has a constant change of fresh shirts.
I do have to say here that at least they didn’t completely rip off Easy Rider because they weren’t wearing spurs. After a couple really idiotic scenes involving the dummies chasing them, they pull over for a chick hitch-hiking in the middle of the desert. Now, I’ve been riding a lot of years and I do remember when girls would hitch hike, but that was decades ago in the city, not in the middle of the desert.
They pull into a gas station and the chick goes inside for some beer. She’s carrying the two sixers (now remember the two small bags that are supposed to have cloths and maybe even some tools) she drops a six pack into each one with no problem; like because they’re empty.
Back on the road and they pull over for the night, have some brews, a little weed and the honey gets naked for the heroes’ buddy. I think the best part of the whole movie are her cute little titties.
The next morning, with no explanation, the dudes are on the road without the babe. Shit, I don’t know, maybe they cooked her and ate her for breakfast. They make it to Indiana, part of the subplot, but not Sturgis and vow to each other, next year.
God help us if there’s a part 2. I also had to ask myself, how after days of riding in the desert do these guys look like they spent a winter in Alaska? No sun or wind burn, no chapped lips or nose, no Racoon eyes, I mean what the fuck?
As I told Keith, the producers should have hired him not to just be in the movie but also as a technical advisor because this flick as a biker movie really misses the mark and the plot has more holes than a drilled brake rotor.
The other sad part is that there are a couple name actors in it. I suppose everybody does what they need to do to put food on the table and some coin in the bank though.
After writing about how badly the writers/producer missed the mark I remembered a poem my mom wrote for me I think for my 40th birthday. After I read it, I looked at her and asked, “Mom, how did you write this?” She replied it was from listening to me and my buddies talking about riding and road trips.
So, what makes me so incredulous about the movie plot is how did a woman in her mid 70s figure it out and these dudes missed it. Let me know if you think she nailed it.
–Steve Bauman
