It has been known for many years that Sex was good exercise, but until now nobody had made a scientific study of the caloric content of different sexual activities. Now after “original and proprietary” research we are proud to present the results.
REMOVING HER CLOTHES:
With her consent……………….. 12 Calories
Without her consent…………. 187 Calories
OPENING HER BRA:
With both hands………………….. 8 Calories
With one hand…………………… 12 Calories
With your teeth…………………… 85 Calories
PUTTING ON A CONDOM:
With an erection………………….. 6 Calories
Without an erection…………. 315 Calories
PRELIMINARIES:
Trying to find the clitoris………… 8 Calories
Trying to find the G-Spot……… 92 Calories
POSITIONS:
Missionary…………………………. 12 Calories
69 lying down……………………… 78 Calories
69 standing up………………….. 112 Calories
Wheelbarrow…………………….. 216 Calories
Doggy Style………………………. 326 Calories
Italian chandelier……………….. 912 Calories
ORGASMING:
Real…………………………………. 112 Calories
False……………………………….. 315 Calories
POST ORGASM:
Lying in bed hugging………….. 18 Calories
Getting up immediately………. 36 Calories
Explaining why you got out of bed immediately……816 Calories
GETTING A SECOND ERECTION:
If you are:
20-29 years old………6 Calories
30-39 years………………………… 80 Calories
40-49 years………………………. 124 Calories
50-59 years………………………. 972 Calories
60-69 years…………………….. 2916 Calories
70 and over……………………….Results are pending
DRESSING AFTERWARDS:
Calmly………………………………… 32 Calories
In a hurry……………………………… 98 Calories
With her father knocking at the door… 1218 Calories
With your wife/husband knocking at the door…. 3521 Calories
