Laughlin Report is up and debate is heated. Bikernet had launched a formal investigation into the price of rooms. Reports are in that rooms were as low as $19 prior to the event and as high as $260 during the event. It stinks. That’s like going to the market for toilet paper, buying 100 rolls and paying 4 times the going rate.

There are also reports of more police presence than mentioned in Frank’s candid article. Undercover was strong in addition to SWAT teams and armored vehicles. Hang on as more information surfaces.

Last night I spent four hours with several biker Internet readers and major Jesse James fans. The conversation was high on message boards. We’ve considered launching a board several times. Whatta ya tink? Let’s get to the news, there’s a woman I want to…, and I rode the King last night. I need more time on the emperor.

LAUGHLIN REPORT FROM FRANK KAISLER–This is just a taste of the Laughlin Report, the bikes, the broads, the broads, the bikes and the cops.

BIKERNET ON PRIORITIES– An old lady was standing at the railing of the cruise ship holdingherhat on tightly so that it would not blow off in the wind.

A gentleman approached her and said: “Pardon me, madam. I do notintend to be forward, but did you know that your dress is blowing up inthis high wind?”

“Yes, I know,” said the lady, “I need both hands to holdonto this hat.”

“But, madam, you must know that your privates areexposed!”said the gentleman in earnest.

The woman looked down, then back up at theman and replied, “Sir, anything you see down there is 85 years old. Ijustbought this hat yesterday!”

–from Bob T.

DAVIE ALLAN ROCK REPORT– I just received the word on the new album: http://www.davieallan.com/mockup.htmlThe release date is August 26th on the “Sundazed” label. Also, a new forum (we need members!): http://groups.yahoo.com/group/KINGOFTHEFUZZ/

–Davie Allanwww.davieallan.com

STURGIS REPORT–Spring Fever has finally come to the Black Hills! Throughout the Black Hills, Bikes & Bikers are out in force! After a week of rain the Hills are putting on foliage at an incredible rate. Bring your cameras!

We wanted to let all of you know that we have remodeled our on-line store front. All of your great favorites are still here and there are tons of new items too. The new cart has a much faster search engine too! We have the most complete on-line Sturgis Rally collection you will find anywhere. Use the search to help find the more unique items you’ve been watching for. One of the newest items is Buffalo Chip Kippered Buffalo Strips… simply delicious!ht.://www.Sturgis.com/mall

As always, putting everything that is available on-line is a huge task, and we are always updating with new merchandise. If there is something in particular that you are looking for and cannot find please, let us know… We just might have the right connection to find those items.

Also watch for our Random Discount, dozens of customers receive random discounts on their orders. The Lucky Shoppers will be notified by e-mail if their order is chosen.

This Newsletter also starts our May Military Special. We are giving FREE SHIPPING to all orders sent to any APO Military address for orders placed from now until the end of May, 2003.

This years Rally schedule is shaping up… it’s going to be a big rally! More bikers and more activities… The Buffalo Chip is bringing in Travis Tritt, 3 Doors Down, Tesla and more… Friday’s band is “hush-hush” so we’re expecting them to announce something BIG! We have events listed from many other places too. Check out the most complete on-line Schedule of Events at:http://www.Sturgis.com/schedule.html

Lodging: There are still plenty of campsites. Hotels, motels, B&B’s, etc. are getting harder to find… there are a few openings yet. Check out the following to help arrange your accommodations… they go fast, so hurry!http://www.Sturgis.com/lodging.html – List of campgrounds, motels, etchttp://www.Sturgis.com/lodgingboard – Messageboard just for Private Housinghttp://www.BlackHillsReservations.com/sturgisdeals.html – One stop reservations for many different accommodation places.

For those of you that are vendors, spots are still available. To find out how to rent a booth during the rally there’s information posted on our site at: http://www.sturgis.com/vendorsjobs.html including links to the various Vendors Manuals.

We’re in the process of updating information about riding in the Black Hills…Check out: http://www.Sturgis.com/ridesmaps.htmlMore to come there yet too…

THE CHEVROLET CORVETTE FIRST ON THE LIST OF TOP TEN STOLEN CLASSIC VEHICLES– The Chevrolet Corvette was named the number one stolen collector vehicle in a recent study conducted by the Hagerty Protection Network (HPN) between July 1999 and December 2002.

The report issued by Hagerty Insurance, the nation’s largest insurer of collectible cars and motorcycles, indicates that vintage Chevrolets are the most stolen brand commanding close to 40 percent of collector cars stolen in the last three years.

HPN named the following models to its Top 10 Stolen Collector Vehicles list:

1. Chevrolet Corvette (1966-1982) 13.3 percent
2. Ford Mustang (1964-1969) 6.5 percent
3. Chevrolet Impala (1958-1967) 5.6 percent
4. Chevrolet Camaro (1968, 1969) 4.7 percent
5. Harley-Davidson motorcycles (1941-1974) 4.4 percent
6. Chevrolet Nova (1963-1972) 3.6 percent
7. Chevrolet Chevelle (1966-1973) 2.7 percent
8. Chevrolet Monte Carlo (1970-1978) 2.4 percent
9. Cadillac DeVille (1955-1965) 2.1 percent
Chevrolet Pickups (1950-1971) 2.1 percent Mercedes 450 (1975-1979) 2.1 percent
10. Ford Thunderbird (1955-1963) 1.7 percent

Broken down by marque, Chevrolet tops the list by a wide margin at 39.3 percent of all Hagerty-insured stolen vehicles, followed by Ford (14.8 percent), Mercedes (4.7 percent), Cadillac (4.4 percent), Harley Davidson (4.4 percent), Pontiac (3.6 percent), J aguar (2.4 percent), Plymouth (2.4 percent), Porsche (2.4 percent), Dodge (2.1 percent) and Lincoln (2.1 percent).

Old vintage Panhead photo from Bob T.

BANDIT’S CANTINA ARCHIVES GROWS–We are constantly looking for unique and interesting motorcycle historical facts for our Cantina Readers. Stuff you just won’t find anywhere else. Stuff that Cantina members will have constant access to when restoring a piece of cycling history. We’ve scored recently.

Bob Tronolone has supplied us with a vast array of antique motorcycle photography. Don Whalen, an antique motorcycle expert, is writing captions for each precious shot. These will become in integral part of out daily antique motorcycle collection.

Bob has also supplied us with invaluable antique memorabilia that will become special features in the Cantina Antique section. In addition he recently found a series of Bobber photos from the ’40s and ’50s. I recently researched the history of the bobber and will share that with this line-up of photographs. It’s a trip.

Finally, we have made a lovely Redheaded connection with the Sturgis Motorcycle Museum. She recently supplied us with a shot and feature of a Museum ’49 Panhead. We hope to launch features of their bikes on a monthly basis.

BUMPER STICKER OF THE WEEK–Who Lit The Fuse On Your Tampon?

–from Bob T.

SCREAMIN’ EAGLE DRAG TEAM RESETS NHRA RECORDS AT ENGLISHTOWN– The Screamin’ Eagle/Vance & Hines drag racing team continues to rewrite the NHRA record books at each Pro Stock Bike event. This time it was GT Tonglet who set a new NHRA record for V- Twin performance with a 7.113 second/187.55 mph run in qualifying for the K&N Filters SuperNationals in Englishtown, New Jersey.

Tonglet?s V-Twin record run aboard the Screamin? Eagle V-Rod placed him fifth in the field. The time was just .013 second off Tonglet?s career best ET of 7.100 seconds.

Teammate Andrew Hines struggled with the windy conditions in first round qualifying and a mechanical issue in the second round. Hines posted his best run of 7.216 seconds/185.66 mph with his V-Rod during the last round of qualifying, but missed the bump time by .009 second. The 7.209-second Englishtown bump time was the quickest in NHRA Pro Stock Bike history.

Tonglet faced 12th-ranked Steve Johnson?s Suzuki in the first round, but had to shut down mid-track due to a mechanical failure. Shawn Gann won the event with a 7.100 second/188.49 mph pass over Craig Treble. Both riders were aboard Suzukis.

?We?re frustrated that we didn?t get both bikes in the field. GT ran great, but we had some bad luck in qualifying with Andrew. We?re learning all the time and we?ve two weeks to get ready for Joliet,? said crew chief Byron Hines.

BIKERNET FRAT BROTHERS–Lee wasn’t the brightest guy in the world, and his frat brothers were continually ribbing him. One in particular, Grady, would greet him each morning and precipitate this exchange:

“Say Lee, you seen Ben?”

“Ben who?”

“Ben’ down and kiss my a–!”

Tired of falling for the same joke day after day, Lee confided in his friend Judd who said, “Listen, next time you see Grady, ask him if he’s seen Eileen. Grady will ask, ‘Eileen who?’, and you say, ‘Eileen over and YOU kiss MY a–.'”

Memorizing his lines, Lee got up early to wait for Grady. As soon as he arrived, Lee ran over to him.

“Hey Grady,” he said, “have you seen Eileen?”

“No,” Grady answered, “she ran off with Ben.”

Lee frowned, “Ben who?”

–from A. Friedman

Continued On Page 2

THE AIM/NCOM MOTORCYCLE E-NEWS SERVICE is brought to you by Aid to Injured Motorcyclists (A.I.M.) and the National Coalition of Motorcyclists (NCOM), and is sponsored by the Law Offices of Richard M. Lester. For more information, call us at 1-(800) ON-A-BIKE or visit us on our website at <

COAST TO COAST BIKER NEWS
Compiled and Edited by BILL BISH,
National Coalition of Motorcyclists

NCOM CONVENTION TAKES MILWAUKEE BY STORM Neither rain, nor sleet nor gloom of night shall stay the dedicated freedom fighters from their course…Milwaukee, Wisconsin, for the 18th annual NCOM Convention.

Tornadoes, hail and rainstorms marked the route from many parts of the country, but near-record numbers poured in from the four corners of America and most Canadian provinces. Many weary travelers arrived wet and cold, but warm welcomes from fellow conventioneers brought out smiles, hugs and hearty handshakes.

Over a thousand attendees gathered at the Four Points Sheraton for a weekend of learning, networking and camaraderie, hosted by the Wisconsin Federation of Clubs. The weekend began on Thursday, May 8th with the National Coalition of Motorcyclists Board of Directors meeting, with directors from all nine NCOM Regions discussing local and national issues affecting motorcyclists.

Friday morning started off with the Legislative Task Force meeting and the AIM Attorney Conference. After lunch, the congregation was welcomed to Wisconsin by Lt. Governor Barbara Lawton and our own Wisconsin State Senator Dave Zien, a longtime member of the NCOM-LTF.

Seminars included “Motorcycle Safety and Insurance,” “The Fight Against Motorcycle Confiscation,” and “We The People; A Biker’s View of the U.S. Constitution.” Special Meetings were convened for “SMRO Presidents,” “Christian Unity,” “Women in Motorcycling,” “Rainbow Caucus,” and “Brothers of the Third Wheel.”

Following the invocation by Kenneth “Stuntman” Hagan of Solders for Jesus, Florida, NCOM Chairman James “Doc” Reichenbach once again rang a bell for our brothers and sisters lost. This moving ceremony has become a Convention tradition, though as Doc laments, “I hope the day comes when we never have to ring that bell again.”

The Confederation of Clubs General Patch Holder Meeting on Friday evening was one of the best attended to date, and featured representatives of 48 COC’s from throughout the United States and Canada.

The Mock Legislative Session was once again both entertaining and enlightening, and received rave reviews from attendees.

Topping off the weekend’s festivities was the traditional Silver Spoke Awards Banquet, recognizing the achievements and accomplishments of our fellow riders. This year’s Silver Spokes were awarded to: Actor Mickey Jones, Entertainment; Cartoonist Paul Jamoil, Art; Scott Cochran, editor of Dixie Rider, Media; Trevor Dealy, Canadian Harley-Davidson Dealer, Commerce (posthumously); Michael Mandelman, Wisconsin AIM Attorney, Legal; and the Ron Roloff Lifetime Achievement Award was presented to Butch Harbaugh, Chairman of the NCOM Legislative Task Force and freedom fighter from Oregon. Also receiving Special Recognition was Marilyn “Lady” Sickler, co-founder of the Brothers of the Third Wheel and NCOM Board Secretary; and “Little Jimmy” Rouse, Business Manager for the MMA of California and member of the NCOM Board of Directors (posthumously).

After the banquet, Mickey Jones donated a script from the final episode of Home Improvement autographed by the entire cast, which fetched $1,000 during the auction to raise money for the Freedom Fund! He also donated several copies of various movies and short films he has appeared in, including the infamous Breath Savers commercial, which garnered several hundred dollars more to be used for lobbying and advancing bikers’ rights causes. Mickey instantly became the star of the Convention, graciously signing autographs until 2 a.m., and was the last person to leave the banquet room.

As news reports flooded the airwaves with storm warnings and tornado sightings, including two that touched down in Oklahoma City, site of next year’s NCOM Convention, motorcyclists bundled up to protect themselves against Mother Nature’s wrath. But as they left the parking lot, each also took with them the tools to protect against a storm of legislation and regulation that is easier to predict than the weather!

Make plans now to attend next year’s 19th Annual NCOM Convention, May 6-8, 2004, at the Biltmore Hotel in Oklahoma City, OK. For further information, contact NCOM at (800) 525-5355.

NHTSA SEEKS COMMENTS ON MOTORCYCLE SAFETY STUDY The National Highway Traffic Safety Administration (NHTSA) and the federal Department of Transportation (DOT) are seeking public comments regarding the collection of data for a proposed motorcycle safety study.

According to information published in the Federal Register on April 29, 2003 (Volume 68, Number 82), “NHTSA asks for public comment on the following proposed collection of information: Title: Characteristics of Motorcycle Operators. Affected Public: Under this proposed collection, personal interviews will be administered to motorcycle operators from the general public. The survey will be administered by face-to-face interviews conducted at sponsored events, races, and recognized motorcyclist gathering sites throughout the United States. In addition, survey data also will be collected at smaller and more localized events such as motorcycle club meetings and popular riding locations. States currently being considered for inclusion are California, Maryland, Michigan, New York, Texas, Virginia, and Florida.”

The post further states that “NHTSA has a central role in the national effort to reduce motor vehicle-related traffic injuries and deaths. U.S. motorcycle-related deaths dropped consistently from 1980 to 1997, but over the past few years this downward trend reversed and injuries and deaths are increasing. The number of fatalities among motorcycle operators rose from 2,116 in 1997 to 3,181 in 2001. Data from NHTSA’s National Center for Statistics and Analysis indicate that this increase is associated with older riders, use of larger motorcycles, and frequent use of alcohol, especially among older riders.”

Recently, NHTSA jointly sponsored an effort to assess future needs regarding motorcycle safety. Recommendations from the National Agenda for Motorcycle Safety indicated that additional research is needed to determine rider characteristics and factors leading to motorcycle crashes. “This study supports the National Agenda and future efforts to reduce motorcycle injuries and deaths by providing updated information about rider operator characteristics, attitudes, and behaviors. Of particular interest will be comparisons of the training, experience, attitudes, and behaviors of those operators who have been involved in crashes versus those who have not,” states NHTSA.

NHTSA proposes surveying a random sampling of motorcycle operators, and indicates that “The findings from this proposed survey will assist NHTSA in addressing the problem of motorcycle operator safety. NHTSA will use the findings to help focus current programs and activities to achieve the greatest benefit, to develop new programs, to decrease the likelihood of such crashes, and to provide informational support to states, localities, law enforcement agencies, and motorcyclists that will aid them in their efforts to reduce motorcyclist crashes, injuries and fatalities.”

Comments must be received on or before June 30, 2003, and can be submitted to: Docket Management, Room PL-401, 400 Seventh Street, SW., Washington, DC 20590. Please refer to U.S. DOT Docket Number NHTSA-2003-14375.*

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Once you find the part you need, go in to Chrome Specialties down below and order online! It’s that simple.

MOTORCYCLE SAFETY AND YOU While NHTSA ponders how to protect us from ourselves, motorcyclists around the country have taken a proactive step toward promoting motorcycle safety and motorist awareness by getting the month of May declared Motorcycle Awareness Month. Virtually every state and major municipality has passed proclamations and resolutions declaring May as the month to “Look Out For Motorcycles.”

In fact, through encouragement by the National Coalition of Motorcyclists, biker vanguard U.S. Senator Ben Nighthorse Campbell of Colorado has announced that he will introduce a measure to declare May as National Motorcycle Awareness Month.

While some states, Massachusetts in particular, are advocating the month of March as Motorcycle Awareness Month due to increased rider fatalities in early Spring, the message is clear that motorcyclists want to promote safety and awareness and decrease accidents and fatalities, no matter what time of the year.

With this in mind, it’s important to keep an eye on rider education funding and take preventive measures to block states from raiding our training funds to balance budgets. Massachusetts is the latest fund under attack, joining Utah and Michigan on the chopping block.

A review of the proposed Massachusetts House Budget shows Section 23, seeks to REPEAL GL c. 10, section 35G, the “Motorcycle Safety Fund.” Further review of the line item budget shows the Motorcycle Safety Fund (Line item 8400-0016) has been transferred to the Registry of Motor Vehicles, in general, (line item 8400-0001), says Paul W. Cote, Legislative Director for the Massachusetts Motorcycle Association (MMA).

Cote also points out that Massachusetts motorcyclists agreed to ‘tax themselves’ an additional $2 of each annual motorcycle registration fee for this dedicated Fund for Motorcycle Safety & Awareness Programs. “The Massachusetts Motorcycle Association is AGAINST the repeal of this dedicated fund, which reduces accidents and injuries,” he says.

On a brighter note, due to intense motorcyclists’ lobbying, the state of Michigan has renewed its rider ed funding and added it back into the state budget. Utah, however, remains unconvinced that their “little safety fund” is worth continuing.

As state legislatures nationwide seek budget compromises, perhaps our battle cry should be changed to: “Look Out For Motorcycle Safety Funds!”

LOUISIANA SENATOR DROPS HELMET BILL It was just four years ago that Pelican State riders won their right to choose regarding headwear, but efforts have been underway in the state legislature to put helmets back on motorcyclists’ heads, or at least on their passengers’ noggins. Four helmet bills went down to defeat this year, including one for passengers only and a Senate proposal that would have required all motorcycle riders to wear helmets which was withdrawn by its sponsor.

According to the Times-Picayune newspaper, “Governor Foster, an avid biker who says riders should be given the choice of wearing the headgear, said he probably would veto any such legislation.”

Four years ago, Foster helped persuade lawmakers to change the law.

“We got it though the Senate two years ago,” said Senator Chaisson upon pulling his bill. “I think we can again, but we can’t get it through the House committee. We’ll try again next year” when there is a new governor in office.

Earlier in the week, the House Committee on Transportation, Highways and Public Works killed a bill that would have allowed motorcycle drivers to remain helmetless but require passengers to wear them, and two separate bills that would have required all motorcycle riders to wear helmets. ABATE of Louisiana, the Louisiana Motorcycle Rights Association (LMRA), ABATE of Northern Louisiana, and the governor’s office led the successful fight against these bills.

“Four for 4 in getting helmet bills canned,” said Steve Howardell, Legislative Director for ABATE of Louisiana, “But remember, our magnanimous governor, who is a rider, will not be overseeing next session, so there will be no threat of a veto hanging over their heads. The safetycrats will be coming after us again, and the bikers of Louisiana need to stand up and be heard as a strong voting block, a united voice, or we have no chance.”

PENNSYLVANIA GOVERNOR SUPPORTS HELMET REFORM Despite threatening weather, more than a thousand bikers showed up at the Capitol in Harrisburg on Monday, May 12 for the annual Motorcyclists Rights Rally sponsored by ABATE of Pennsylvania. Among the speakers was Governor Ed Rendell who presented a proclamation declaring May as Motorcycle Safety and Awareness Month throughout the Commonwealth. Governor Rendell also stated during the rally, “I support Senator Wozniak’s (helmets optional) bill and I will sign the bill.”

“That puts a little momentum on our part,” said Charles Umbenhauer, lobbyist for ABATE of Pennsylvania.

That same day, Wozniak’s helmet modification bill, Senate Bill 259 (PN 265), was re-referred to the Senate Appropriations Committee, and the full Senate will most likely vote on the bill in early June. A secondary scenario would have ABATE amending House Bill 607 (PN 709) by Rep. Kirkland to designate State Route 291 in Delaware County as the Senator Clarence D. Bell Memorial Highway. Senator Bell was an avid supporter of ABATE and annually authored their helmet repeal measure. This bill has already passed the House (197-0) on May 12th, and now awaits consideration by the Senate.

“If we could successfully amend this bill with our helmet modification provision, we believe it would have a good chance of passing for obvious reasons,” explained Umbenhauer. “Then the bill would have to be returned to the House for their concurrence with Senate amendments. That should be a doable thing. Then the bill could be sent to Governor Rendell for his signature. This could all happen in June before the legislature takes their summer recess.”

Other legislation of interest to Pennsylvania motorcyclists includes special motorcycle registration plates for veterans (HB-184/SB-279); automobile lemon law to include motorcycles (SB 216); covering loose loads on trucks (HB 880); and abandoned mine lands for use as ATV trails (HB 330).

TENNESSEE TO ALLOW PULSATING TAIL LIGHTS The city of Memphis is the only place in the state of Tennessee that requires the annual inspection of motorcycles, and “The head of the inspection department has taken a part of the city code to an interesting interpretation,” says Fogman of CMT/ABATE of Tennessee. “Aftermarket manufacturers sell a brake light which pulses rapidly for the first few second when activated, but whenever our erstwhile bureaucrat sees one of these offending lights, he refuses to pass the bike and tells the owner to take it home and remove the illegal light and then come back. His reason? People might confuse the offending light with a fire truck!”

Fogman says, “We tried to reason with him but got nowhere, so CMT/ABATE introduced a bill to clarify that these lights are legal.”

CMT/ABATE’s “brake light bill” has since passed both Houses and been signed by their governor. “When the bill allowing pulsing brake lights becomes law, we are going to present said public servant and defender of a lawful society with his own personal copy of it,” Fogman promises. “Sometimes there is justice in the world.”

MARYLAND PARKING BILL PASSES Motorcyclists in Maryland may be able to legally park two or more bikes per spot after the state legislature overwhelmingly approved House Bill 923 (voting 132-2) and Senate Bill 650 (46-0). The parking bill will prohibit local governments from restricting the number of motorcycles that can legally be parked in a metered parking space.

Current law allows local governments to restrict the number of motorcycles to two. Only some local governments limit motorcycle parking in this manner, but it can cause confusion and hardship for motorcycle riders who are unaware of the restrictions. This law would eliminate confusing and sporadic enforcement practices and make parking regulations for motorcycles uniform throughout the state, according to ABATE of Maryland.

BIKERS LOUD AND CLEAR AGAINST NOISE ORDINANCE Motorcycle enthusiasts packed Town Council chambers in Old Orchard Beach, ME recently to oppose an ordinance proposed to silence loud bikes. “Education, not legislation, is the key to getting along,” Howard Karakhanian of United Bikers of Maine told town officials at the public hearing.

“It’s just not necessary,” one biker, Rick Musial, told the council. “There’s no need for it.”

The ordinance being considered would outlaw loud motorcycles such as those with altered mufflers.

According to the Portland Press Herald, the proposed motorcycle ordinance would prohibit bikers from installing noisy, attention-getting exhaust pipes. The measure also would outlaw “rapid throttle advance and/or revving of an internal combustion engine resulting in increased noise from the engine and exhaust system.” Under the ordinance, a first-time offender would be fined $50. Repeat offenses could bring fines of $500.

The measure, said Police Chief Dana Kelley, “is an effort to stop those who come here and abuse the privilege. This ordinance would enable us to deal with exhaust systems with no mufflers. We’re not looking to target motorcyclists in general.”

Councilor Roxanne Frenette, who said she has a motorcycle, said bikers who don’t alter their machines won’t have any problem. Motel owners are among those who favor cutting down on motorcycle noise, which Kelley said is the No. 1 complaint he gets during the summer. Norm Marquis and Marc Bourassa, who run motels, said motorcycle noise bothers their customers. “Not a day goes by when someone doesn’t ask me, ‘Why is that allowed?’ ” Bourassa said.

Councilors are scheduled to vote on the proposed motorcycle ordinance later this month.

WEIRD NEWS OF THE MONTH: JESUS IN TROUBLE FOR NOT WEARING A HELMET A man riding a motorcycle while dressed as Jesus to celebrate Easter in Colombia was almost fined for not wearing a helmet. The man was acting out bible passages near the church of Maria Goretti in the streets of Las Delicias neighborhood in Cartagena.

Parish priest Aristobulo Duque told El Tiempo newspaper that Jesus was supposed to be on a donkey but it had been stolen during the night so he decided to use a motorcycle instead. The police officer who tried to fine him said: “You can be Jesus but you are on a motorcycle and are not wearing a helmet. I feel bad but I have to fine you.”

Witnesses say when the policeman tried to fine ‘Jesus’ the crowd started to boo and the priest convinced him not to do it. The priest said: “Can’t you see he is Jesus? And in Jesus? times there were no helmets how could he wear one?” The policeman agreed and ‘Jesus’ was not fined.

QUOTABLE QUOTE: “I am afraid that the current helmet law, as written now, is almost totally unenforceable. I requested an Attorney General’s Opinion on the matter and the answer we received has led the Commanders of the Highway Patrol to the conclusion that unless a rider has a cooking pot on their head each individual officer will have to be able to articulate that he/she was able to determine from a distance that the helmet did not meet the standards set by USDOT. Our law relates to what manufacturers have to do. The Highway Patrol is not against, or for helmets, as we are not the policy makers, however the law must be clear so that we can fairly and evenly enforce it.”

David S. Hosmer, Colonel
Nevada DPS, Highway Patrol Division

* Following came from a Bikernet Reader. His statistics demonstrate that accident rates are not up. Check it out. It’s Bikernets contention that the NHSTA should study the number of motorcycle accidents caused by motorists and act on that aspect.

BIKERNET ACCIDENT REPORT CORRECTIONS–Damit Bandit, you published NHTSA’s lie in Thursdays news again. Assoon as they get the whole world convinced that “TRAFFIC SAFETYOFFICIALS SEE SHARP RISE IN MOTORCYCLE FATALITIES” they will startdumping a bunch of “safety” laws on our asses. If you’re going topublish it can’t you at least set the record straight? They are using bogus data for “vehicle miles traveled (VMT)” to come up with thislie.

How can we have over a million more motorcycles on the road in2001 thSn we did in 1998 and travel a billion fewer miles? NHTSA saysthe average rider traveled 1,943 miles in 2001. Our recent Internetsurvey showed that only 7% of motorcyclist traveled under 2,500 milesand 74% travel more than 5000 miles per year. 26% said they travelmore that 10,000 miles per year.

There is not any increase inmotorcycle fatalities, it’s another NHTSA lie! The total number ofinjuries have actually lowered. The percentage of injured that die hasremained the same. The number of fatalities track with the number ofregistered motorcycles with a consistently widening gap since 1986. Iwill again attach the charts I compiled from NHTSA’s Traffic SafetyFacts Report dated December 2002.

FTW,
–Stroker

Continued From Page 2

BIKERNET RELATIONSHIP ADVICE–A guy can’t get his unit up anymore, so he goes to the doc’s to get things checked out. The doc does a full exam and tells the guy “Hate to tell you this, but you’ve worn your penis out.” The guy asks “What do you mean ‘Wore it out’???…I can never use it again??” The doc says “You’ve got *MAYBE* 30 more times with it…”

The guy is depressed as all hell and decides to go home and tell his wife. He fills her in and she’s like “Only 30 more times?? That’s horrible! Why…each time will have to be for special occasions…we should make a list!”

He says “I already did, and you’re not on it!”

–from David M.

LASER CUT FOR YOU–This is a completely unique motorcycle gift. PERSONALIZED WITH YOUR NAME, CLUB OR MESSAGE (One or Two lines-20 letters & Spaces per line). Plaque is Laser cut from 14-gauge steel then brush polished and lacquered. Measures 24″x6.5″ and is drilled with two mounting holes. (Two drywall anchors with brass screws included). You can have anything you want cut into the 8-inch by 2-inch center piece for $69.95 + $10 UPS S&H. Your name, nickname, wife, girlfriend, date, event, memory, business name, favorite saying, use your imagination. TO ORDER CALL Toll Free 1-800-283-1717 (10 to 3 Pacific time). All forms of payment accepted.

Your Satisfaction is 100% Guaranteed. Allow 3 weeks for delivery-Rush Service available on request. ORDER NOW 1-800-283-1717.

PAINT JOB OF THE WEEK–The Crazy Horse Paint Job of the Week belongs to Beth Vale of Gaylord, Michigan. Not too many women request skulls, but she and her husband Tom designed every detail on this one. They wanted the skull not to be too mean looking, bone white flames that fade to a dark silver, black pinstripe, and for the base coat color, the reddest red on the market, which turns out to be House of Kolor Blue Blood Red.

Gaylord is a small town pop. 9,000. But I think this paint would stand out anywhere. One of the old redneck guys who hangs at the bodyshop that does my clear work claims that this paint, out of all my paintwork that he has seen, he likes the best. Not what I’d expect from guy whose main ride is a golf cart.

BIKERNET FORIEGN RELATIONS NEWS–An Englishman, a Dutchman and a Frenchman are all in Saudi Arabia,sharing a smuggled crate of booze when, all of a sudden, Saudi policerush in and arrest them. The mere possession of alcohol is a severeoffence in Saudi Arabia, so for the terrible crime of actually beingcaught consuming the booze, they are all sentenced to death!

However, after many months and with the help of very good lawyers,they are able to successfully appeal their sentences down to lifeimprisonment. By a stroke of luck, it was a Saudi national holiday theday their trial finished, and the extremely benevolent Sheikh decidedthey could be released after receiving just 20 lashes each of the whip.

As they were preparing for their punishment, the Sheikh announced: “It’smy first wife’s birthday today, and she has asked me to allow each ofyou one wish before your whipping.”

The Dutchman was first in line, he thought for a while and then said:”Please tie a pillow to my back. This was done, but the pillow onlylasted 10 lashes before the whip went through. When the punishmentwas done he had to be carried away bleeding and crying with pain.

The Frenchman was next up. After watching the Dutchman in horror hesaid smugly: “Please fix two pillows to my back.” But even two pillowscould only take 15 lashes before the whip went through again and theFrenchman was soon led away whimpering loudly (as they do).

The Englishman was the last one up, but before he could say anything,the Sheikh turned to him and said: “You are from a most beautiful partof the world and your culture is one of the finest in the world. Forthis, you may have two wishes!”

“Thank you, your Most Royal and Merciful highness”, the Englishmanreplied. “In recognition of your kindness, my first wish is that yougive me not 20, but 100 lashes.”

“Not only are you an honorable, handsome and powerful man, you are alsovery brave”. The Sheikh said with an admiring look on his face. “If 100lashes is what you desire, then so be it. And your second wish, what isit to be?” the Sheikh asked.

“Tie the Frenchman to my back.”

–from Buckshot

TEXAS BIKINI WASH–On May 25th the Martin Bros, located down in Duncanville, Texas will behaving a free Bikini Bike Wash and a Bike show. Joe, Jason and the crewbuild some of the meanest customs around.

Their latest bike, the Dragsta II,was unveiled at the Dallas Easyriders show. The complete details follow, aswell as a couple of shots of the bike.For more information contact the shop or go to the website:

Martin Bros Bikes
519 East Highway 67
Duncanville Texas
972-709-2552
www.martinbrosbikes.com

–Chuck

ONE LINERS FROM THE GOOD DOCTOR–1) My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought hewas God and I didn’t!
2) I don’t suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.
3) I work hard because millions on welfare depend on me!
4) Some people are alive only because it’s illegal to kill them.
5) I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.
6) Don’t take life too seriously, you won’t get out alive.
7) You’re just jealous because the voices only talk to me.
8) Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
9) Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.
10) Quoting one is plagiarism; Quoting many is research.
11) I’m not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.
12) Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
13) NyQuil – The stuffy, sneezy, coughing,why-oh-why-is-the-room-spinning medicine.
14) The trouble with life is there’s no background music
15) God must love stupid people; he made so many.
16) The gene pool could use a little chlorine.
17) It IS as bad as you think and they ARE out to get you.
18) I took an IQ test and the results were negative.
19) Consciousness: that annoying time between naps.
20) Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
21) To err is human, to really foul things up requires a computer.
22) Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew up
23) My Dog Can Lick Anyone
24) I Have a Degree in Liberal Arts – Do You Want Fries With That?
25) Computer programmers don’t byte, they nibble a bit.
26) All men are idiots and I married their king!
27) Failure is not an option. It comes bundled with the software.
28) My wild oats have turned to Raisin Bran.
29) A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.
30) Stupidity is NOT a handicap. Park elsewhere!

–from Nuttboy

BIKERNET TRAVEL ADVICE–An airline’s passenger cabin was being served by an obviously gay flight attendant, who seemed to put everyone into a good mood as he served them food and drinks.

As the plane prepared to descend, he came mincing down the aisle and announced to the passengers, “Captain Marvey has asked me to announce that he’ll be landing the big scary plane shortly, lovely people, so if you could just put up your trays that would be super.”

On his trip back up the aisle, he noticed that a well-dressed rather exotic-looking woman hadn’t moved a muscle. “Perhaps you didn’t hear me over those big brute engines. I asked you to raise your trazy-poo so the main man can pitty-pat us on the ground.”

She calmly turned her head and said, “In my country, I am called a Princess. I take orders from no one.”

To which the flight attendant replied, without missing a beat, “Well, sweet-cheeks, in my country, I’m called a Queen, so I out-rank you. Tray-up, bitch.”

–from A. Friedman

FROM THE BIKERNET SPECIAL OPS REPORTER–Figured I would show you the latest addition and a few images from The May Day Poker Run last Sunday.

Just got back from Oh Canada the whole week sucked and the snow bunny lost her mind. Just proves that no matter what country you are in, they are all crazy!

The Poker Run did not seem to have as large a turn out as last year. Not sure if that has anything to do with the C.O.C. meeting on the same day or not. Patsy Thompson played this year again. I need to see if her new CD is out already. Just a bunch of good ol? folks just having fun.

The Pan is a 56? With some new upgrades like disc bakes & electric start. The blonde in the red shirt tried to run over me while I was trying to do my job as a correspondent.

I see some folks are looking for the bedrolls. Keep one with my name on it if & when you decide to get some more.

–RFR

PRO-FATTY– So you’ve got the big meat, now how are you gonna keep it from throwing roadkill all over you and your precious mount? PRO-ONE has you covered with their new PRO-FATTY rear fender. Custom fabricated from a single piece of heavy gauge steel, no welded seams to split, these awesome units measure a full 9 inches in width, plenty wide enough to house today’s popular Big Meat tires. Available in three styles, Bobbed, Heritage and Contour, each fender is fit with wire tubes on both sides and comes ready for paint.

Suggested retail for the new PRO-FATTY fenders is $289.95 and they can be ordered from any PRO-ONE dealer or by calling 800-884-4173. Catch PRO-ONE on the web at www.pro-one.com or email sales@pro-one.com.

DEFINITION OF A HARLEY–Definition of A Harley: From here up Roy Rogers, from here down Southern Pacific.

–old shot from Bob T.

POUR THE TULLAMORE DEW–It’s time to post this mess and scramble to the garage. I dug through the back streets of Wilmington, California, for old maritime junk yards, but they’re a dying breed. I searched for metal-art scrap. We’re building new fences around the Bikernet headquarters out of steel, motorcycle wheels and handmade steel gargoyle faces. Hang on.

I was also looking for some small, 1.5-inch brass rings to braze into dainty female Bandit belt buckles. I found a half dozen at Kelly’s Marine salvage yard just a couple of blocks away. We live in the best part of town–the ghetto.

Keep an eye on the site. Several features are on their way. I may take shots, as I make two buckles this afternoon. Newlyweds are heading this way from Strokers of Dallas. I need to fix them up properly. Jose didn’t mention my rare, stylish buckles in his descriptions of the latest trends. Hope I’m not on the outs. They’re featured in the Digital Discovery area of the Cantina.

Ride Forever,
–Bandit

Continued From Page 1

Bob T. dress for style in 1974.

BIKERNET CARIBBEAN REPORT GOES STYLE AND FASHION– I received a copy of Freeway magazine (from France) a few days ago. We had a small feature in it and it was pretty cool. The editorials by Zed are really good, but with my limited French I loose a bit of the “real content” .

They have a style of reporting events like Daytona, pretty much like what we do here in Bikernet. Whoever goes takes a bit and reports about it. The difference is that we all report our point of view, they do different angles to get the complete idea, needless to say in a very different way to what we are used to in the US. So once more you might be wondering what the fuck am I talking about ?

Here’s a synopsis of the article titled Gangsta’ Paradise. Eric was talking about the “look” of builders and industry people, and I mean younger, at Daytona (and every place else) The loose shirts, the baggie pants, sneakers, tattoos (well these are not exclusive to young), backwards caps, beanies, etc, etc. The old Heavy Metal which has been replaced by hip hop, or rap Ala Kid Rock, punk rock, or even Funk. The choppers sporting “pointy” objects, not the soft lines, the bullets and the brass knuckles. The kind of bikes being built now, rigids, with lots of rake and stretch and “gros pneu” or big ass tires, jockey shift and no nonsense approach (sort of a follow up on my less is more rant of last week).

But ladies and gentlemen, strippers and saints, this will be the first time that yours truly will take a serious approach at fashion in the bike world, or at least attempt to explain a point.If you think of a biker, most people think of leathers, boots, skull caps or bandannas and a bunch of crap attached to those leathers or hanging from any other article of clothing (for a pretty good example of the Faux bad ass look, check your local HOG or Main Street rally time)/ That can’t be further from the truth. So let’s keep on…..

Stylish gentlemen from the biker collection.

Sure leathers will save you from some road rash and sorta keep you warm and the boots and all that hoopla. But in reality, the ” biker” of today is a lot more than a riding individual. There’s booth’s to peruse, places to go, standing up for long hours, working at the shop, etc,etc. To top it off the space in bikes is less and less. Bulky stuff is out, stuff that can be used and be comfortable is the norm. So let’s take this shit apart, piece by piece…. Baggie pants and jeans, wearing those jeans that are so tight, restraining movement and making you sing soprano after a while, is out. We can live without them. Most of the younger industry people wear pants that are comfortable, can be dirty and can be used as much as wanted, but not because we are following a hip hop trend. Besides, why ruin a good pair of Levis (for special occasions only) while we can beat the shit out of some Dickie’s and replace them for less than 20 bucks? Shorts? No thanks been burnt enough.

Sneakers, while this is not new, it has changed a bit. I have seen Arlen Ness and other builders wear white sneakers for a long time, the only difference is that the ” newer generation’ prefers Vans or Pumas, so why is this? Try standing around for eight hours, which sometimes turn to sixteen or twenty in a pair of “shit kickers” or engineer boots. Yeah, you might as well wear stripper stilettos, because you will take the same beating. So if something happens we are not as protected as with boots, that’s correct, but I rather risk my ankles than kill them. And let’s not even talk about nasty blisters. Are we copying the young skateboarders, nope we are being smart. Plus their grip factor is excellent in these days of ” billet” and bare metal controls.

Shirts are the same issue, something that is (and most of the time) saying who you are and what you do, or who your friends are and what they do. It’s free advertising at its best. We wear it loose for all the above reasons, unless we are buffed and want to impress some chick. I prefer dark colors so the stains don’t show. It’s all a matter of convenience. Plus is the daily bread of most shops.Caps and bandannas, they have several uses. In places where’s there’s no helmets, the caps are what keep your hair in place.

Have you seen Billy Lane, his hair? He went the extreme way and grew da’ dreadlocks mon… It is a major bitch trying to get those knots out, needless to say painful, plus it protects us from the sun and becoming red necks. Even wearing the caps under the helmets prevent that awful smell that helmets gain after some time, you know what I mean, and presto, no comb, no nothing, just take that stupid lid off and look like a champ. The security blanket of the biker, the infamous bandanna, as many uses as a tie wrap or duck tape, best used to avoid those deadly needle like rain drops from our mugs, hold the hair in case of loosing the cap on the Freeway, and everything and anything. But please, they have no use whatsoever tied around your ankle or thigh, that’s really gay.

And now the most famous item of all–the chained wallet. Have you ever lost a wallet on the road? Now you know why. The Vest? Unless you are in a 1% club, or freezing your ass coming back from the Love ride, no way! Gloves? Mechanic gloves or dumpster, some protection from the cold and better yet from burning items on your bare bike. Someone has to stick their hand in there, better be prepared. Tattoos, self explanatory, being here since the start of the civilized world. Jackets? Any lighter jacket will do. There’s preference for working jackets, like Dickies. If they are good enough for guys who work day in and day out in them (and warm enough) they are good enough for me, plus they are easier to handle and stow than any big ass, heavy leather jacket, and save some cows as well.

So what do I make of all this? To some it might be a certain style of certain people (see Jesse James for a good example), but in reality this ” young guns” of the industry are being practical. Simple as that, and wearing stuff that is all around, as practical and uncompromising as the choppers we build.

Gotta get to the news since I got another piece to write for Glamour…..

And now to the news:

We have received a few e-mails from the boys in Iraq, pretty cool stories of stuff that we have not seen on TV (and are not compromising national security) There’s claim that one of the favorites web sites amongst the forces from Puerto Rico is ChopperFreak.com, even more we have heard that there’s a The Horse banner flying around some secret place in Baghdad, I still waiting for the photos and I will post them here as soon as we get them.

We also received an e-mail from a friend who is hand-fabricating miniature choppers out of wood, pretty cool and very detailed. They even come with a show case. You can reach Miguel at maikol99@hotmail.com, he’s a very talented artist and wants to get his wares out in the world.

And now to the hottest news of the week, we have received a letter from a lawyer requesting the immediate cease and desist of selling our “Priceless” shirt, (note* I can mention anything I want here since this is the news and protected by the Fair use Copyright act). They claim that our “version ” is too similar to the credit card ad. Since I have no desire to give a red cent to any of these guys I am not going to argue and take the shirts off my site. But, a little research and help from various friends has lead me to this:

The Copyright act 107 allows fair use as long as it’s a parody, the acclaimed “tarnishment” and dilution can only be achieved if the words are used in a repulsive or immoral manner to consumers, and the shirt does not compete with a Financial Institution which is what the credit card company is. As well the copyrighted words are ” PRICELESS” noted that it’s all in caps, and ” There are things money can’t buy for everything else there’s Mastercard (again this is protected for my use under the Fair use Copyright act, since it allows news reporting and parody). We ended our shirt with, ” There are few things money can’t buy, for other there’s always suicide.” If you read word for word, it’s not the same. You will be the judge.

More so, the letter claims it is only valid for Puerto Rico, so that means I could use it for the US. Now all this said, what has me in awe is How the fuck did they figured this one out ?

We are not that famous, and I know why. Someone here Snitched, and I have a vague idea of whom it was. I guess they are just envious of our vast success, while they are thieves in order to pay the bills. And I know they might read this… So here it goes: At least I’m not using false advertisements in my ads (which is punishable up to $10.000 in Puerto Rico). I’m not infringing on the copyrighted Harley-Davidson, West Coast Choppers, Screaming Eagle and such logos to promote goods without permission. Plus they are using the trademarked, West Coast Chopper logos, on business cards and print ads (while not being a dealer). They also copy shirts and caps with trademarked logos. You fuckers opened the Pandora’s box, now tighten your britches, motherfuckin’ Weasels !

Jose@chopperfreak.comCheck the photo.

We’ve heard of some recalls from Indian motorcycles and as soon as we get them we will let you guys know about them.

As we speak the Myrtle Beach rally is taking place, let’s see if we get some reports from the front, we received a letter from HOG SC of their intentions of leaving the “riff raff” piggybacking on the image of hog…. Let’s see what’s up with that. Also the boycotts’ results and damage done.

Also heard on the grapevine that our pseudo competitors are building a web site. Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery….Have fun Suckas !

I’m glad to report that I have been hired to do a monthly editorial, kinda what I do here, you know, bitch and rant with no mercy whatsoever, on our local motorcycle magazine Bikerspot. It’s gonna be fun and I will make sure I piss a lot of people off. What the hell, they hate us anyway….Be prepared.

Ok, enough rant and bad blood, have a nice week end, enjoy the bike and go riding, Summer is across the corner, the rallies are starting to sprout, take a trip, send me a chick, do something……..See you next week…..Remember the only certain things in life are death , taxes and me giving someone or something hell, here in Bikernet.

–Jose, Bikernet’s Caribbean reporter

Continued On Page 3

Old shot from Bob T.

What the hell! I’m trying like a mad dog to post the news post haste. I’m at a loss for an intro and I think I know why. She whispered in my ear this morning, “Coffee, news or sex?” I was caught up with my goddamn list for the morning, looking at the clock and feeling the pressure of multiple deadlines. Okay, so I broke one of the major Code Of The West Rules. A man never passes on an opportunity for sex.

My punishment will be severe. I’m already feeling the nasty effects of writer’s block. We better get to the news, quick:

MYRTLE BEACH FEELING THE BOYCOTT BLUES–

Fewer vendors means Horry County is nearly $200,000 short on money officials planned to use to fill budget gaps, said county spokeswoman Lisa Bourcier.

The county will have to make up the difference by leaving some job openings vacant and taking money from elsewhere, Bourcier said.As of 5 p.m. Wednesday, 233 vendors had bought county permits, compared with more than 500 vendors last year, Bourcier said.

Organizers of the Carolina Harley-Davidson Dealers Association Myrtle Beach Rally say the permit price reduced the number of vendors.

“I can’t imagine many more being sold,” said Sandy Leone, spokeswoman for Myrtle Beach Harley-Davidson, headquarters for the rally.

RUN FOR BREATH UPDATE–Just a quick update on the 5th Annual Run For Breath. Billy Lane sent us some great door prizes from Choppers Inc. Jose said his awards are done and are waiting for paint.

Have you rented an 18 wheeler to ship the “Best of Show” award? Oh by the way, the layout for the T-shirt was completed this week. It’s lookin’ great!

–Mike Pullin

COPS TRYING TO SHUT CLUB PARTY DOWN– East Hartford Police Department, intent on shutting down any party put on by the Hells Angels MC, took a message to the owner of Michael’s Restaurant Cafe, where the Hartford chapter of the Hells Angels had hoped to have its Spring Breakout Party on Saturday.

First scheduled at the Shamrock Cafe in Suffield, the party moved once Suffield police encouraged the bar’s owner to close for the day instead. Hells Angels then approached Eugene Lavigne, Michael’s owner, and he agreed to host the party.

But Thursday, two East Hartford officers informed Lavigne that he did not have the town’s mandatory $10 amusement permit, which needs 90 days to process. They also told him that he would have to foot the roughly $3,500 bill to pay for the six officers, one supervisor and associated cruisers, as per state statute.

Lavigne remembers the conversation. “They said that they don’t want that kind of element in the town of East Hartford, that’s what they said,” he said.”What choice do I have? I have to comply with them, otherwise they’d put me out of business” he said.

–from Rogue and Bikernews.net

NEW DIGITAL DISCOVERY FIND–There’s a special spot in Bandit’s Cantina, the secret, membership only section of Bikernet. We hunt day and night for odd, rare, unknown and untold stories and post them in the Digital Discovery area. It’s a kick. This week we posted biker fiction from 1930, illustrated with the above fine art.

The Cantina is cheap, less than a couple of bucks a month. That contribution supports all the content on Bikernet. Enjoy.

COP FEELS THE HEAT–Dennis Kalinoski, 60, was accused of possessing firearms while using crack cocaine, selling guns and ammunition to a convicted felon, and transferring such weapons for use in drug trafficking and violent crimes.

“When you see a former law enforcement official betray his past, it’s always disheartening,” U.S. Attorney Patrick J. Fitzgerald said.

If convicted, Kalinoski would face a maximum of 10 years in federal prison and a $250,000 fine on each of the three counts in the complaint.

Federal officials said an unnamed member of the Black P Stones street gang identified Kalinoski as a crack user and gun supplier last week. The information prompted an investigation that included an undercover purchase of firearms, surveillance and the seizure of seven guns from an individual seen leaving Kalinoski’s house in suburban North Riverside.

Agents raided Kalinoski’s North Riverside home Saturday night and found 402 guns and tens of thousands of rounds of ammunition, authorities said.

–from Roque and the Outsiders Bikernew.net

BIKERNET THOUGHT FOR THE WEEK–There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra thanAlzheimer’s research. This means that by 2020, there should be a largeelderly population with perky boobs and huge erections and absolutelyno recollection of what to do with them.

THE INCREDIBLE LA CALENDAR MOTORCYCLE SHOW–HOT FOR JULY 19TH-20TH WEEKEND– Now in its 12 year, the Performance Machine sponsored Los Angeles Calendar Motorcycle Show produced by FastDates.com publisher Gianatsis Design Associates has grown to become the biggest and best Custom and HiPerformance Street bike Show in America. Held on the 3rd weekend of July at the Queen Mary Event Park on the edge of the Pacific Ocean in exciting downtown Long Beach, we weren’t content to sit on our hands when we could make the best Bike Show in America even better. Joining our associate sponsors Corona Beer, ReCycler.com / Cycle Buys, Trader Publications / Cycle Trader, Iron Works magazine for Harley enthusiasts and BikerNet.com, and The Shop will be The Los Angeles Times, one of America’s leading and largest newspapers assisting with pre event publicity and post event coverage. The Speed Channel’s premier American motorcycle series American Thunder produced by WATV will also be dedicating an entire program to the Calendar Bike Show as they do every year.

A favorite attraction at past Calendar Bike Shows, our West Coast Horsepower Dyno Shootout returns this year sponsored and produced by Jardine Headers, America’s premier performance exhaust system manufacturer for sportbikes and V-Twin motorcycles. Bike builders and enthusiasts will be able to roll their 2-wheeled rockets up on the Jardine dyno in front of hundreds of spectators and prove just how much horsepower their bikes really produce.

Another new attraction this year will be the Jim’s Machine Burnout Contest produced by one of America’s leading engine component manufacturers in the American V-Twin market. Taking place on the front straight of the SuperMoto track each afternoon during race intermission, this is the chance for performance bike exhibitionists to show how much smoke they can make in destroying a rear tire to the cheers of thousands of admiring fans. The folks at Jim’s Machine promise to award trophies for this eye watering / ear shattering mayhem that are as unique as the Burnout Contest participants themselves.

Additional Spectator and Exhibitor information for the Show can be found online athttp://www.FastDates.com/BIKESHOW.HTM

A BIKERNET RELIGIOUS MOMENT–“Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose woman.”

The priest asks, “Is that you, little Tommy Shaughnessy?”

“Yes, Father, it is.”

“And who was the woman you were with?”

“Sure I can’t be tellin’ you, Father. I don’t want to ruin herreputation.”

“Well, Tommy, I’m sure to find out sooner or later, so you may as welltellme now. Was it Brenda O’Malley?”

“I cannot say.”

“Was it Patricia Kelly?”

“I’ll never tell.”

“Was it Liz Shannon?”

“I’m sorry, but I’ll not name her.”

“Was it Cathy Morgan?”

“My lips are sealed.”

“Was it Fiona McDonald, then?”

“Please, Father, I cannot tell you.”

The priest sighs in frustration. “You’re a steadfast lad, TommyShaughnessy,and I admire that, but you’ve sinned and you mustatone. You cannot attend church for three months. Be off with you now.”

Tommy walks back to his pew. His friend Sean slides over and whispers,

“What’d you get?”

“Three month’s vacation and five good leads”, says Tommy.

–Rogue

CHOPPERS INC. ON BIKERNET–That’s right. Jose, the Bikernet Caribbean reporter unveils the inside story behind the Choppers Inc. experience. It’s on the home page now.

THE BIKERNET FARM–On the farm lived a chicken and a horse, both of whom loved to playtogether.

One day, the two were playing when the horse fell into a bog andbegan to sink. Scared for his life, the horse whinnied for the chickento go get the farmer for help! Off the chicken ran, back to the farm.

Arriving at the farm, he searched and searched for the farmer, but tono avail, for he had gone to town with the only tractor. Runningaround, the chicken spied the farmer’s new Harley. Finding the keys inthe ignition, the chicken sped off with a length of rope hoping he stillhad time to save his friend’s life.

Back at the bog, the horse was surprised, but happy, to see thechicken arrive on the shiny Harley, and he managed to get a hold of theloop of rope the chicken tossed to him. After tying the other end tothe rear bumper of the farmer’s bike, the chicken then drove slowlyforward and, with the aid of the powerful bike, rescued the horse!

Happy and proud, the chicken rode the Harley back to the farmhouse, andthe farmer was none the wiser when he returned.

The friendship between the two animals was cemented: best buddies,best pals. A few weeks later, the chicken fell into a mud pit, andsoon, he too, began to sink and cried out to the horse to save hislife! The horse thought a moment, walked over, and straddled the largepuddle. Looking underneath, he told the chicken to grab his “thing” andhe would then lift him out of the pit. The chicken got a good grip, andthe horse pulled him up and out, saving his life.

The moral of the story:When you’re hung like a horse, you don’t need a Harley to pick up chicks.

–Rogue

BIKERNET SHOVELHEAD–We’re damn excited about the completion of this 4-year project by Strokers Dallas. If I come out of this terrible 10-year writers block ailment. I’ll write a progress report this afternoon. Watch for it.

NEW BOOK FROM WHITEHORSE PRESS–A new edition of one of Whitehorse Press’ perennial bestselling books, HOWTO SET UP YOUR MOTORCYCLE WORKSHOP, has just come off-press and is nowavailable. Packed with easy-to-read practical advice, author Charlie Masidescribes designing, building and equipping the workshop you need and helpsyou make the most of your available space. This is a must-have,money-saving reference you’ll return to time and again.

HOW TO SET UP YOUR MOTORCYCLE WORKSHOP: TIPS AND TRICKS FOR BUILDING ANDEQUIPPING YOUR DREAM WORKSHOP, 2nd Edition by Charles Masi, 175 pages, b/willustrations throughout, item code W-MASI2, $19.95http://www.whitehorsepress.com/email.asp?cn=50245&en=en0305&id=masi2

Eight profiles of real-world workshops, from small garage spaces topurpose-built restoration and race-prep shops, are featured in this editionto provide ideas and inspration for Do-It-Yourselfers. Each profile has ascaled layout of the shop with photos as well as tips from the owner ordesigner. With the workshop design in place, Masi helps identify themust-have and want-to-have tools to appropriately equip the space, and bestof all, how to use them.

Continued On Page 2

Continued From Page 3

Custom Chrome ? and Chrome Specialties ? have joined forces to bring you the most comprehensive product offering in the Harley-Davidson ? aftermarket! At over 1,400 pages and over 25,000 part numbers, our 2003 Catalog features everything from nuts & bolts to HR3 bike kits, and sets the NEW industry standard.

ONLY $9.95 + 6.95 Shipping**

Once you find the part you need, go in to Chrome Specialties down below and order online! It’s that simple.

old photo from Bob T.

BIKER/POLICE RELATIONS–Biker rolling through town on his custom, fastest bike in town. He’s going around a bend when he rolls up on a cop. The blue lights come on and out rolls the cop. The biker thinks, “He’ll never catch me in that car” and takes off. Several miles later the cop is still behind him as he pulls over.

The cop walks up to the biker and asks for his license. Then the cop says, “OK. I’ve had a crappy day, and I’m ready to head home. Come up with a good excuse for speeding away from me and I’ll let you go.”

The biker looks at the cop and replies, “The old lady left me last week for a cop. I was afraid it was you and you were trying to bring her back.”

Cop hands him his license and tells him to have a nice ride home.

–From Chris T.

AMAZING WIDE 21–Hallcraft’s has announced the availability of its new 21″ X 3″ wirewheel designed specifically for the new 120/70X21 tire. Introduced tomeet the market demand for a front wheel with greater stability andmaneuverability when used with the ever popular wide rear wheels. Theyare available in either 46 Texas Big Spoke radial, or 80 and 100 spokein cross laced or radial laced designs. These babies are guaranteedtubeless and featured Hallcraft’s exclusive factory balancing system.Suggested retail pricing starting at $1025.00.

For more information regarding Hallcraft’s quality products contact:Hallcraft’s Industries Corp. at PO Box 1036, Gainesville, TX 76241-1036or phone 940-668-0771 or e-mail hallcrafts@nortexinfo.net or visit ourweb site at www.hallcrafts.com.

LOST BIKERNET CV CARB TECH INFO–We recently lost a CV carb tech link on the site. Fortunately a reader jacked us about it and we scavanged until the article was located. Since a lot of riders run CV carbs and need them enhanced for modified engines we’ve placed it back on the home page.

Ron Trock is a strong source for reliable performance modifications and CV carb mods.

Trock Cycle
13N417 French Rd.
Hampshire, Il. 60104
PH. 1-847-683-4010

HIGH SPEED WOBBLE TRIBUTE– I want to pass something by you for your information. While on myrecent trip, and traveling at approximately 112 mph I let up on thethrottle because I had had enough at that speed. As I released thethrottle, my FLH went into a violent high speed front end wobble. FranklyI don’t know how I survived it. Anyone who has truly experienced such aviolent wobble, and lived to tell about it, can’t help but think long anhard about riding again and or about finding the cause. The cause may well bestupidity for the speed. and that’s the answer.

Now I have already determined that a cause was my poor judgment attraveling at such a high speed and loading up the front end by releasingthe throttle. However, after we get past that, we get to the part whereit’s not suppose to happen and Harley denies that it does. Well I am hereto tell you that’s pure bullshit. Now if you want to tell me that the FLHshouldn’t be ridden in excess of 80 mph , then tell me , but don’t put aspeedo with 120 on it, and then tell me its all my fault for going 120.

In any event, someone suggested that the gear changes could have, in someway, contributed to or caused the wobble by some change in the dynamics ofthe bike. Please understand I am not placing any blame, I am just tryingto examine all possibilities. If it boils down to my own poor judgment,then I accept that, but if there is any possibility the twist gearscontributed to it, then they are coming out because I don’t ever want toexperience that wobble again.

Thanks

The above letter was answered by John Siebenthaler who works with Johnson Engineering who manufacture Twist Gears.

Whoa – that’s a story. I can’t comment on the wisdom of running a dresserat that speed, but that’s why they make Buells. Taking into considerationframe geometry, aerodynamics, weight distribution, suspension, roadconditions, etc. I can flatly say the transmission had nothing to do withit. Neither did the battery or tour pak. Well, maybe the tour pak.

Touring Harleys at speed have long been an issue. Try any of the listservers for harley/wobble, and see what you come up with. Think aboutit…you’re riding a Barcolounger with the aerodynamics of a barn andthinking a shot at the land speed record. But the veryfirst item for consideration is the fork-hung fairing on an FLH and theframe mount of an FLT.

A couple of years ago, Fat Boy owners were blaming that same wobble on thesolid wheels. I don’t know, maybe there is something to that in a severecross wind, but try getting an admission from the motor company (I thinkthe element of informed consent has some bearing on their thinking, as doesthe huge range of riding ability). And as you well know, all they need isone rider who does that kind of speed routinely and your argument is moot.

To me a troubling aspect of the current crop of contemporary riders andtheir bikes is that the power to weight ratio has gone through the roof,without corresponding attention being paid to core aspects of frame andsuspension, which are absolutely critical for high speed operation, or,lets face it, rider abilities.

We’ve got a guy here who runs a big inch nitrous bagger at the drags, Ithink his times are in the low 120 range. And Gerry Merchant (Merch Motors)runs our TwistGear in his 131-inch baggers all over Canada. We redesigned theoil seal because of his high speed shenanigans, but never heard anythingabout wobble.

If whoever suggested the Sophist connection between transmission and frontend cares to convince me that all things green are grass, I’ll listen.However, we’d have to run down everything else in between first, like wheelspacers, tire pressure, tire and wheel balance, wind conditions, etc. I’m not takingshots, but think what happens when you back suddenly out of the throttle atthat speed and rewind what you’ve seen on the Speed Channel of the Daytona200 as they approach the chicane coming out of turn four. Then we’ll cutopen a goat and read the entrails for signs.

My theory is a combination of several of the above, plus tire deflectionthat would have to occur as a large amount of weight is instantaneouslyshifted from the rear of the bike to the front, along with severe forkcompression. Just a windage guess, but weight distribution probably wentfrom something like 30-70 to 80-20 in a fraction of a second as the bikeunloaded and downforce caught the fairing.

–John

We spoke to John this morning and discovered more research on handling. The two most important aspects of handling according to a mystery expert, are wheel construction and tire pressure. We’ll bring you more data in the near future.

GASOLINE ALLEY NYC–Deep in the heart of Brooklyn, NY’s industrial waterfront district lies Indian Larry’s GASOLINE ALLEY NYC. Neatly tucked between warehouses and commercial buildings, magic is being made daily.

TBear caught up with the gang recently and shot a feature on one of their bikes. Watch for it to be launched over the weekend.

TECH INFO ON BIKERNET–We try our damnest to answer tech questions within 24 hours. If I don’t know the solution, I turn Frank Kaisler (long time motorcycle mag editor and tech head), Pablo, a master mechanic from Charlotte Harley-Davidson, or any number of master mechanics, Hamsters, antique motorcycle enthusiasts or manufactures. We endeavor to squeeze the answere our of someone.

A reader recently asked about removing the legs from a ’02 touring bike. Here’s Pablo’s response:

“Do you mean the the sliders/lower legs not the tubes?? Also when you say dresser you mean the FLHT models and not Road Kings?? This depends on the year. Air assist yes, for sure. Newer 02 FLHT’s and later models have a cartridge dampner in one side and H-D adiosed the air system. The air system made it easy to put fork oil back in the legs. You used vacuum to do this task.

Now you have to take apart the forks to fill them. This means removing the hole damn fork tube ass’y from each side. There are other ways to do this which are not recomended byH-D. You can use vacuum to draw up the fork oil but still need take off a bunch of plastic/switch etc. to get to the fork tube caps. That process needs a lenghty splaination. I use that vacuum device I made. That was in a tech article awhile back, remember??”

–Pablo

First, I asked the question without enough information. That lead to the above garbled explanation. I’ll try again.

BIKERNET SEXUAL ADVICE–Two guys are talking over a beer, discussing various sex positions.The first guy says his favorite position is the “rodeo”.

The other guy asks what the position is, and how to do it?

The first guy says, “You tell your wife to get on the bed on allfours and then do it doggy style. Once things start to get underway andshe’s really enjoying it, lean forward and whisper in her ear –

‘Your sister likes this position too’…..

Then try to hang on for 8 seconds.”

DEAL OF THE WEEK–Just got the following e-mail from Mike Cole. Selling a bike. If anyone’s interested contact him directly at mikecole@bright.net.

“Hey, I’m trying to sell my bike, and thought I’d see if you could get the word out. It’s an 01 Road Glide w/some extras. 18” tires[130 if., 150 r.] chrome wheels w/ rotors, and pulley to match, Thunderheader, extra chrome, etc. I have 18k invested. I’ll let the windshield, derby cvr. stay, and I’ll sell for 18k. Luxury Rich Red. Buy! Buy!Buy!

I have it paid for and I can use the money for material. I’ll buy a new one, and make the payments. Thanks in advance.”

–Mike Cole

BIKERNET SPORTING ADVICE–A man is in his back yard trying to fly a kite. He keeps throwing itinto the air, where the wind catches it for a few seconds before itcomes crashing down.

Watching him from the kitchen window, his wife mutters how men haveto be told how to do everything. So she opens the window and yells,”You need more tail!”

He shouts back, “Make up your mind! Last night you told me to go fly a kite!”

–from Nuttboy

IT’S BEEN A GOOD DAY–The bike at the head of the news was built by Rick Fairless and his crew at Strokers in Dallas, for Bikernet. The bike began as a 1984 Mexican Police bike that I purchased from Arlen Ness.

Watch for a full feature on the bike in the near future. The engine was built by JIMS machine. They also rebuilt the transmission. Harold Pontarelli painted the 5-Ball logo and the sheet metal. The frame and rims were powdercoated by Custom Powder Coating in Dallas. The rigid frame is a Paughco. Damn, it’s a hot little 1928 Shovelhead. Nice work.

Have a helluva weekend.

–Bandit

Continued From Page 2

BIKERNET CARIBBEAN REPORT– I don’t know if you have noticed, but recently there’s a lot more “talking” and a lot less news, so you may ask why ? Of course I’m going to answer this, my way, since I pre-hooked the question. I don’t know if the things that I use for the news are less important to me today, like such and such ride of the local HOG, or any other sort of irrelevant information, or it’s simply that the “biking” scene this side of the Atlantic is not hot and happening right now (event wise). Or it could be that we ( I and all) are really too busy to keep the network going. Sometimes the best news are the ones I can’t share with you guys. May it be that the event or action is planned for the future and until it happens, I can’t say shit. Sometimes it’s information I should not share or was are asked not to.

I enjoy ranting about general stuff. If you want to get something different let me know, I might have an idea or two up my sleeve. Like I’ve said many times before, everything changes. We are in constant evolution, well maybe not everything. Sometimes when I am laying around, thinking about what should I write, some ideas stick and stay , then they start evolving. This one started as simple as a short ride to one of our local hang outs.

We all change, right? Some decide to live in the glory days past. Styles, bikes, clothing, it all changes, or does it ?I was riding a couple nights ago to a party for Cinco de Mayo. I took one of the choppers at the shop, randomly, and rode away, but you know what’s funny, I felt totally uncomfortable and out of place. I was not “happy” riding. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not like a chopper is a replacement for Prozac. The bike is as neat as can be, rigid chop, with a potent motor and really nice lines. It’s a bike I really enjoyed breaking in, but I hated it for some reason. It wasn’t the bike, it was me….

While all the hot chicks were dancing and pounding the Tequilas and Cervezas, I could not get the sense of “not liking it” out of my mind. Don’t get me wrong. It was hard to get a decent thought, since the party was full on, and needless to say, the Puertorrican beauties in those low cut jeans and shirts make a pretty strong “point”. But I still pondered. Between mental images of hot babes girating, I have realized the reasons, or the reason, I’ve changed.While sometimes I don’t give a fuck what I am riding, like when people lend me a bike or want me to try it out. It really matters to me what I do ride, to put it mildly, sometimes I’d rather walk than ride a bike I don’t like. Yeah call me a snob, what the hell do I care. This all started more or less five years ago, on one of my early dates with my current ex. We went riding and I grabbed a Fat Boy (for her comfort) but man was I a sorry ass, lame, puppy. I hated the ride. Yeah, it’s retarded, new girl on the back, kick ass beach roads, the tropics, and still I felt totally out of place, uncomfortable should be the right word and it was the bike.

As we all have styles, guess what? So do I, and I’m calling mine, “minimalistic” simplicity at it’s purest form, or like Frank Lloyd Wright coined, “Less is More”.I hated that short ride because the bike had mirrors, speedo, switches and a whole lot of other stuff that I really don’t like, stuff that clutters the area and in reality are of no purpose, (by the way before we keep on and for the sake of argument, have you ever had a mirror that worked?). It had the wrong bars (for me) and too many of those gadgets that the DOT make manufacturers use in order to get the “Sticker”. I might be sounding like a prima donna to some, but I guess I can choose what I want, Right?

To top it off, I have been rebuilding my old Pan chop and while trying to do it with the less money possible, I find myself looking for stuff that would, and now hear this, make me happy. I don’t really give a flying fuck if it works or looks good, I like stuff that you can barely see, or even better that can’t be seen or is not even there.

Sure I have to be reasonable, I can use jockey shift / suicide clutch, but in PR I would be really dumb if I did not have a front brake, or at least something to grab the bike while I take off. I have a couple choices, and the usual would be a six piston, 13″ rotor, nope, wrong. The smaller the better, 2-piston, 8 1/2″ rotor. I’ve been going crazy trying to find the smallest (hope invisible) master cylinder possible, such is the way it is. Sure I may go with a 250 tire, or 120 spokes, but at least it’s clean and simple, not over done aluminum stuff with intricate designs, like the norm is today. Front fenders are history, if it rains, you get wet, rear fenders, minimal, just enough space for a back rest and maybe a bitch pad, gas tanks with enough capacity to get you to the next station. I guess you know what I mean.

It’s not my call to do “theme” bikes, nor overdone baggers. We follow our path, as simple as that. I’m taking a wild guess and would say that’s the state of mind of the early bobbers and choppers…Just a hunch.Anyway, this is a small example of what I mean. This line of thought is too long for here, check upcoming issues of The Horse for the full story.

A now to the news…..or lack there off…. The local HOG chapter celebrated their Mother’s day ride last Sunday. The numbers are in the 300’s. I bet they had a lot of fun wearing leather chaps and jackets in 90 degree weather. As always, and as it always be, I did not go. I heard they had fun doing the Macarena.

By the way, Happy Mother’s day to everyone out there. Remember it’s this Sunday. Get to the store before all the cards are gone.

I just received Freeway magazine from France, Rumble Customs has it’s Camel Bike featured there, plus a really cool story on Daytona 2003 by every member of the staff. Also a few cool choppers from all over. Those guys have a really great publication, too bad it’s only available in France and of course french.

Anyway…I’m outta here.

–Jose, Caribbean Bikernet reporter

BANDIT’S CANTINA PLUG–There’s a new episode of Bandit’s Cantina Soap Opera up in the Cantina. Don’t miss it. By joining you support all of Bikernet for better and mo’ content. Just click on the link at the bottom of any page.

Do it for Mom.

–Wilburn Roach

FINALLLY BAD DRIVER TAKES THE FALL–A Des Moines charter van driver and his employer face 14 criminal charges between them nearly a year after a Tama County crash killed three motorcyclists and critically injured three others on U.S. Highway 30.

Gary Butler, 48, allegedly fell asleep at the wheel of the empty van on June 22. The van crossed the center line of the two-lane highway near Chelsea and slammed into six eastbound motorcycles.

Butler shuttled railroad workers from eastern Iowa to Boone for Armadillo Express, a Cheyenne, Wyo., charter company.

A grand jury decided Monday to charge Butler with three counts of vehicular homicide, six counts of involuntary manslaughter and two counts of serious injury by vehicle. The company was charged with an additional three counts of involuntary manslaughter. Butler testified that he had been tired after a long shift, witnesses said.

The crash killed three motorcyclists who rode nearest to the center line: Arlen Pickering, 53, of Story City; Douglas Sampson, 51, of Ames; and Ross Holland, 57, of Boone. The injured men were Jim Olson, 62, Richard Vauble, 50, and Wayne Wierson, 56, all of Ames.

Olson, who was hospitalized with a brain injury for four months, suffered hearing loss in one ear, eye damage and a loss of balance.

He has no memory of the accident, but said he was riding last in the line of motorcycles. Reports indicate that Olson laid down his motorcycle and slid around the wreckage. The impact threw him into the air, and he landed on pavement more than 100 feet from his motorcycle.

“I never liked life the way I have in the last few months because I’m alive,” Olson said. “But my friends aren’t.”

The experienced motorcyclists were on their way to a motorcycle open house in Anamosa. It wasn’t clear where Butler was going.

All the crash survivors and families of the victims are suing Butler for undetermined sums of money, Olson said.

He said the crash caused him to leave his job and collect disability payments. The former water-softener dealer bought a new motorcycle, but hasn’t taken it for a ride.

“I guess I’m not ready to,” he said.

Send a letter to the editor

Bro, this will show that some people still value human life. The pisser is the punishment won’t fit the crime, but it’s a start. The newspaper is The Des Moines Register (Iowa).

–from David Dinneen

Continued On Page 4

Continued From Page 1

NEW PERFORMANCE PRODUCTS WEBSITE–H&L Performance produced the bad ass engines that Orange County Choppersused on their Jet Bike and the Black Widow Bike. I have been working ontheir website for a few weeks now and would like to see it added to yourfine page under “Web Links”. They do awesome complete billet motors,head work comparable to NONE and many more “Go Fast” treatments to allV-Twin’s (American). Thanks for your consideration! Sorry, here is the link

http://www.handlperformance.com

–Jerry

CHOPPERS ONLY ISLAND EVENT–On the island of Oahu July 6, 1st annual Choppers only! run and show.Raffle Run start’s at MoanaLua Gardens at 10:00am and will end at 1:00 at the Hard Rock Cafe in Waikiki. All bikes are welcome.Bike Show from 1:00 p.m. to 3:00 p.m.,Judging Start’s at 3:00 pm.

Classes
1). Old Style Chopper
2). New Style Chopper
3). Digger
4). Island Style
5). Best of Show

Each class 1st. Place $500.00 cashand hand made Retro Trophy.

Emcee will be hosted by Local Comedian Andy Bumatai.Entertainment by Biker Blues and also Big DogAssorted giveaway’s from Hard Rock Cafe and special Sponsor’sAny question’s or interest in the event Call Decon at 808-236-0405.

NEW AIR THROTTLE STOP–We would like to introduce the improved MPS Air Throttle Stop. We made it smaller (Just 2″ wide at its widest point) by incorporating the adjustment lock collar directly to the special air cylinder rod. In using this design we were able to eliminate the extra adjustment rod completely. The air cylinder screws directly onto the mount eliminating the set screws being tightened down on the stainless steel cylinder. This prevents any possibilities of bending the cylinder and binding the piston inside. We have eliminated the ball chain as well, removing all possibilities of breakage. So, be sure you compare the features our new “Stop” before you buy an imitation of our original Air Throttle Stop.

To celebrate, the new and improved Air Throttle Stop, we offering the “MPS Heads Up Combo Package.” This package incorporates the MPS Air Throttle Stop (Lectron or Mikuni) and a Dedenbear Throttle Stop Controller for one low price of $499.00. This saves you $100.00 off the regular price of this package. The sale ends 5/18/2003 at Midnight so don’t delay. Order your “MPS Heads Up Combo” P/N 1-0330 today and start winning races!

For those of you who are new to Throttle Stops, they are designed for slowing down a bike to run a specific index while still maintaining high MPH. The new MPS Air Throttle/Stop is used with the Dedenbear Throttle Stop Controller P/N 11-TSC-2. This is the only NHRA legal throttle stop for a motorcycle and is available for Lectron carbs P/N 1-009 and Mikuni type carbs P/N 1-0091.

Operation is simple, just set the amount you want the carb slides to drop during throttle stop operation (adjusts from 0″-1.5″) with the adjustment lock collar. The Throttle Stop Controller controls when and how long the throttle stop is activated. After leaving the starting line the carb slides will drop to the preset point where they will stay until the timers deactivate it allowing the slides to return to wide open throttle. Through all this your hand remains at full throttle. It will not turn your throttle grip! The speed that the slides open and closed can be adjusted independently of each o! ther and can be made to open fast or slow. This lets you dial in an easy roll on or roll off the throttle. Using the throttle stop right off the starting line can eliminate wheel spin entirely for the ultimate in consistent 60 footers. The Air Throttle/Stop comes with a throttle cable, electric air valve, air tee, air line, and installation instructions.

You will need to mention the Internet special to get this sale pricing. Go to our web site at http://www.mpsracing.com/ and click on the secure order form to order yours today. These purchases will count towards the 2003 contingency purchases, so register online now! Click on over to the ever growing instruction area while you are surfing. You will find over 50 sets of product instructions for MPS, MSD, NOS, Dyna, and Computech products. And as always, enter the Tether Kill Switch drawing. Dick Hartman of Thunder Valley Cycles in Fremont, IN was the lucky winner in April. Congratulations Dick!

–Dan Rudd
www.mpsracing.com

CYRIL DOES IT AGAIN–Cyril Huze Tribal Clothing (Jackets, Caps, Tees). He never stop designing, manufacturing or creating. This is a sample of his latest line.

Cyril Huze CustomMotorcycles & Parts
http://www.cyrilhuze.com
http://store.cyrilhuze.com
Tel: 561-392-5557
Fax: 561-392-9923

A BIKER’S NUTS–On the outskirts of a small town, there was a big, old pecan tree just inside the cemetery fence. One day, two bikers filled up a bucketful of nuts and sat down by the tree, out of sight, and began dividing the nuts. “One for you, one for me. One for you, one for me,” said one biker. Several dropped and rolled down toward the fence.

A young boy came riding along the road on his bicycle. As he passed, he thought he heard voices from inside the cemetery. He slowed down to investigate. Sure enough, he heard, “One for you, one for me. One for you, one for me.”

He just knew what it was. “Oh my”, he shuddered, it’s Satan and the Lord dividing the souls at the cemetery. He jumped back on his bike and rode off.

Just around the bend he met an old man with a cane, hobbling along.

“Come here quick,” said the boy, “you won’t believe what I heard! Satan and the Lord are down at the cemetery dividing up the souls.”

The man said, “Beat it kid, can’t you see it’s hard for me to walk.”

When the boy insisted though, the man hobbled to the cemetery. Standing by the fence they heard, “One for you, one for me. One for you, one for me…”

The old man whispered, “Boy, you’ve been tellin’ the truth. Let’s see if we can see the Lord himself.” Shaking with fear, they peered through the fence, yet were still unable to see anything. The old man and the boy gripped the wrought iron bars of the fence tighter and tighter as they tried to get a glimpse of the Lord.

At last they heard, “One for you, one for me.” And one last “One for you, one for me. That’s all. Now let’s go get those nuts by the fence, and we’ll be done.”

They say the old man made it back to town a full five minutes ahead of the boy on the bike.

–from Chris T.

Continued On Page 3

I’m up to no good this week. Custom Chrome is back as a Bikernet sponsor. I need to rock through the news since Buzz Buzzeli, the editor of American Rider is headed to the headquarters for a meeting about the next issue. The HORSE deadline is hanging over my head. and I need to finish one of the final chapters of my first Chance Hogan books. Tomorrow we’re working on the King for American Rider and Bikernet. Some final touches will bring it to life. The Amazing Shrunken FXR is beginning to move into its final stages, and it’s Mom’s day.

Of course my 81 year old mom is on the road, as usual. She’s in Victoria, Vancouver. I don’t know why. She follows Jazz festivals all over the country and just recently returned from a tour of Italy. She loves to travel. Say hello to your Moms for me, goddamnit. Let’s get to the news.

SELF DEFENSE AWARENESS SEMINAR THIS WEEKEND–Richard Bustillo, a biker, Bandit’s Sifu and member of the Martial Arts Hall Of Fame, has the distinction of being certified as a law enforcement defensive tactics instructor with the FBI, LAPD and LASD. He will conduct a Self Defense Awareness Seminar for Women and Men this weekend. May 10, 2003, Saturday 11:00 a.m. to 1:00 p.m. The fee is 10 bucks a person or 15 for two. IMB Academy (310) 787-8793, 22109 So. Vermont Ave., Torrence, CA. Don’t miss it.

5TH ANNUAL RUN FOR BREATH IS COMING JULY 27TH– The event sponsored by Charlotte H-D is a tribute to the founder’s son, Justin. Mike Pullin the father behind the event donates the proceeds to the American Lung Association kids’ camp program. Don’t miss the rides, poker run, bike show and bands.

Old shot from Bob T.

2003 STURGIS HALL OF FAME INDUCTEES– ?Ever wonder who mastered those colors?? states Jim Betlach. ?Candy Apple Red, Metal Flakes, Pearls, you name it, Jon did it. Jon Kosmoski created the famous paint studio House of Kolor in the early fifties. Today, House of Kolor paint is used on virtually everything that has wheels, everything cool that is. From a small body shop in the fifties to national and international fame in the nineties, Jon Kosmoski?s House of Kolor has set the bar that everyone wants to reach.?

Dave Perewitz concurs, ?Jon Kosmoski has been a major influence in the custom motorcycle paint market since the beginning of custom paint. Jon?s expertise has helped most of today?s custom painters. His seminars are unforgettable and his books and tapes have been a source of knowledge and guidance for struggling painters.?

?In the early 70?s Gary Bang saw that a large percentage of riders enjoyed customizing or ?chopping? their motorcycles,? says Micah McCloskey of Micah McCloskey’s Custom Cycles. ?He also saw that the Harley dealerships did little or nothing to help this part of the market. Gary came out with an after-market catalog of custom accessories for Harley choppers. The American motorcycle enthusiast finally had a company that carried what they needed, and wanted. Gary started the trend, big business copied it and finally Harley?Davidson recognized the importance of this part of the market. It is this part of American motorcycle enthusiasm that has propelled Harley-Davidson to where it is today, and Gary Bang was the first one to help meet this need??The Sturgis Motorcycle Museum received nominations for over 20 exceptional candidates,? said Pepper Massey-Swan, the Museum?s Executive Director. ?After carefully reviewing all of the credentials it was determined by the Board of Directors that Jon and Gary had earned this recognition due to their innovative ideas, implemented to serve a special niche market that would enjoy growth beyond even their wildest dreams. We are extremely proud to add their names to the list of talented and honorable people who have impacted motorcycling in such a significant and positive manner.?

The Annual Hall of Fame Induction Breakfast will take place, Wednesday, August 6, 2003 at 9:00 a.m. at the Holiday Inn in Spearfish.

Tickets for the breakfast are available for a $20.00 donation per person or $160.00 per table of 8. All previous breakfasts have been sold out so we recommend you purchase tickets early. Tickets can be purchased by calling the Museum at 605.347.2001 or on line www.sturgismotorcyclemuseum.org

SCREAMIN’ EAGLE DRAG TEAM MAKES HISTORY AGAIN IN ATLANTA–Hines Qualifies 5th and Tonglet Qualifies 8th; Both Riders Win First Rounds, Set Records.

MILWAUKEE, WIS. – (May 4, 2003) It was another history making weekend for the Screamin’ Eagle/Vance & Hines drag racing team as both riders qualified their V-Rod bikes for the NHRA Pro Stock Bike Summit Southern Nationals at Atlanta, Ga. Both riders went on to win their first round runs on Sunday, setting new NHRA records for V-Twin performance in the process.

Screamin’ Eagle/Vance & Hines V-Rod rider Andrew Hines qualified 5th with a new V-Twin record run of 7.214 seconds/185.43 mph. That run bumped Suzuki-mounted Craig Treble from the field for the first time in his 58-event career. It was another testament to the competitiveness of the NHRA?s Pro Stock Bike class, where more riders went home after qualifying than made the 16-bike field, as 34 riders attempted to make the Sunday show. Screamin? Eagle/Vance & Hines V-Rod rider GT Tonglet qualified 8th with a best run of 7.234 seconds/183.234 mph.

GT Tonglet won his first round against ninth-ranked John Smith aboard a Kawasaki. Smith red-lighted, but Tonglet and his V-Rod would have prevailed anyway with a 7.215 second/188.99 mph run. Andrew Hines posted a 7.179 second/183.12 mph run in the first round against twelfth-ranked Sean Conner?s Suzuki, also advancing his V-Rod to the second round. Tonglet?s trap speed of 188.99 mph and Hines? 7.179 second elapsed time each set NHRA Pro Stock Bike records for the best performances by V-Twin-powered motorcycles in series history.

In second round action, Tonglet red-lighted his V-Rod against Geno Scali?s top-ranked Suzuki. Scali would move on to win his semi-final round and the final. Hines beat Suzuki-mounted Shawn Gann off the line, but had to back his V-Rod out of the throttle as he drifted toward the wall and Gann won.

?Both bikes are responding well as our continued development efforts are obviously paying off. I?m happy we have our hands around this program and we?re competitive,? said Byron Hines.

SPAM OF THE WEEK–I receive over 200 e-mails a day. Mostly SPAM, but this had a Harley for sale so I grabbed it. Beware, could be a scam or just a sales effort.

These are just some of the unbelievable items waiting for you at Free Bidding:
* 1993 Sea-Doo
* 1991 Harley Davidson FatBoy
* 1989 Mustang GT

* 1999 Dodge viper

* PLUS LOTS MORE

Click on the link below to join Free Bidding now!!http://lists.mailogen.com/t/?u=296&l=29&id=3311582

AOL Users Click Here

BIKERNET LESSON IN CUSTOMER SERVICE–A woman got on a bus holding a baby. The bus driver said, “That’s theugliest baby I have ever seen.” Mad as hell, the woman slammed her moneyinto the fare box and took an aisle seat near the rear of the bus.

The man seated next to her sensed that she was agitated and asked herwhat was wrong. “The bus driver insulted me,” she fumed.

The man sympathized and said, “Why, he’s a public servant and shouldn’tsay things to insult the passengers.”

“You’re right,” she said. “I think I’ll go back up there and give him a piece of my mind.”

“That’s a good idea,” the man said. “Here, let me hold your monkey.”

SURGICAL-STEEDS SELECTS MIKULAK CONSULTING AS LICENSING AGENCY–SAN DIEGO–April 16, 2003–Mikulak Consulting (www.mikulak.com), an independent, full-service licensing agency offering services that help companies build and exploit long-term value using their patents, copyrights and trademarks, announced today that it has signed Surgical-Steeds Classic American Motorcycles Inc. (?Surgical-Steeds?), manufacturers of the Steed Musclebike? (www.musclebikes.com) to a worldwide, exclusive multi-year licensing agency agreement. Surgical-Steeds, the leader in the design and manufacture of premium, high-performance American motorcycles, retained Mikulak Consulting to develop and implement a strategic licensing program in order to capitalize on its position within the industry and to better reach its customers.

Mikulak Consulting will leverage the unique brand that Surgical-Steeds has developed through its specialized approach to licensing ? an approach whereby Mikulak Consulting acts in a capacity similar to an in-house licensing and marketing executive who would be responsible for building brand equity and generating revenue at the same time. Mikulak Consulting will be representing Surgical-Steeds to manufacturing partners who are capable of creating and distributing products that complement the purpose of the brand.

Surgical-Steeds ? Classic American Motorcycles?

Designed and built in Scottsdale, Arizona, the Steed Musclebike is truly a product of its environment ? the Arizona desert: Desolate, wide-open highways, scorching temperatures and longer distance rides are not friendly to most motorcycles in general and most customs bikes in particular. These brutal conditions demand an approach to motorcycle design and manufacture that emphasizes performance, quality, reliability and practicality ? attributes previously unavailable in a low-volume American motorcycle before the Steed Musclebike. And, unlike other low-volume motorcycle builders, Surgical-Steeds is a federally licensed motorcycle manufacturer, meaning all come with a 3-Year Factory Warranty, DOT, EPA and CARB Certifications and are also listed in the NADA and Kelly Blue Book Motorcycle Appraisal Guide, thereby establishing consistent resale value and full-coverage insurance availability.

THE CRAZYHORSE SAGA CONTINUES–I have sad news for all the handsome men in the Northeast. Crazy Angie went down to Florida last month. Seeing as how we were both traveling by air around the same time and with all that was going on in the world right then, we were both pretty nervous. I wasn’t around and didn’t get the message she left on voice mail until a week after she left it. I couldn’t believe it. I couldn’t bring up her number in the phone quick enough. I only hoped she would answer the phone. Just as I was about to give up she answered, ” Hello, this is Mrs Angie Pelletier.” Angie got married!!!!!! She was in Florida for 6 days and hooked up with her boyfriend from 2 years ago. He let her get away 2 years ago, I guess he wasn’t taking any chances this time.

My latest paintwork is a Marine Corp themed paint job for a former Marine up in Kentucky. The tank was tedious to do but my favorite part of it is the bulldog on the airdam. I just finished up a skull with flames on a softail and am working on airbrushing an eagle on a heritage tank. Getting ready to start the airbrush work on the lovely Jennifer’s new chopper. I’ll post more pics next week.—–

—CrazyHorse

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RAIN AND NEW RULES DAMPEN DAYTONA BEACH

Daytona Bike Week started Friday February 28th and so did the rain. So far it has dampened more than spirits and the crowds are not evident on Main Street.

Bars and restaurants are doing fine though.

Although officials want the Bikers to spend money, they are fining those that have too much fun. Showing too much skin will cost ya $106.00 and too much to drink in public $53.00 (Don’t Even Think About DUI). Failure to turn headlight on or no eye protection is $44.00, handlebar height, loud exhaust etc. It just goes on and on.

Bikers bring about $260 Million into town annually to the local economy. Town’s people as well as the visiting bikers feel that they are being taken advantage of.

Many popular activities, like spaghetti wrestling at Bikers Paradise and coleslaw wrestling at the Cabbage Patch, are outside the city limits on state road 415 and not subject to the stricter laws. Both places will hold the events on Wednesday March 5th and the weatherman has said the rain will move on.

I hope for once he is right. The Paradise will also host a Best Buns/Wet T-shirt contest,Thursday. Look for fun action at these and other places in the county. If you are not sure what is happening, where or when, just pick up one of the handy event guides that are on counters in shops, restaurants and bars. If you don’t have a good time, it’s because you’re not paying attention.

And of course check in with Bikernet on a regular basis to keep up with WAS HAPPENIN’. If you see me have me take your picture.

–ROGUE

WELCOME TO ORLANDO BIKE WEEK

By MARK HARPER
Staff Writer
Last updated: Mar 1, 10:40 PM

ORLANDO — Rich Mosher downed another Budweiser as he was showing aninquirer how he put $22,000 worth of customization into an $18,000 “hog.”Nearby, a police motorcyclist inched between two rows of orange cones,competing to see if he could deliver the slowest time without placing hisfeet on the ground.

No lines formed at the Swamp Rat Bar, despite the presence of Jack DanielsGirls to pour shots; inside the Harley-Davidson dealership, there were justas many people drinking at the coffee bar.

Welcome to Orlando Bike Week.

The Orlando counterpart to the traditional Daytona Beach Bike Week may onlybe 3 years old, but it’s making strides. Some 100,000 visitors are expectedat the nine-day event that started a bit slowly Saturday. Though little rainfell, people were discussing radar maps perhaps more than that afternoon’sappearance of the 1970s rock band Foghat.

Organizers find Orlando Bike Week an event with promise, a natural, with thepotential to showcase more of Central Florida’s attractions to visitors withgood demographics.

But it is a bane to some Volusia and Flagler county retailers, hoteliers andvendors, who rely heavily on Bike Week as a time to make the money thatmakes their year profitable. There are fears that spreading the action willresult in spreading the wealth.

Some — including Daytona Beach Harley-Davidson owner Bruce Rossmeyer — goso far as to say the Orlando organizers are “taking advantage” of Daytona’scampaign to tame Bike Week. If bikers are turned off by high room rates,efforts to control noise, nudity and inebriation and the city’s concernsabout the cost of playing host to big events, some fear they will move theparty southwest.

“My concern as a Harley dealer is they are going after business that’s outthere, and God love ’em,” Rossmeyer said. “Competition is good for businessand consumers.”

For their part, Orlando Harley-Davidson co-owners Steve and Anne Deli saythey are merely trying to widen Bike Week’s scope by giving riders moreoptions. Making it a Central Florida event can only attract more bikers andtheir disposable income, said Anne Deli.

“We’re hoping the emergence of Orlando will help grow Bike Week beyond whatit is today in Daytona,” she said. “There should be millions of peoplecoming to Bike Week.”

OFFICERS IN FULL FORCE DURING BIKE WEEK

By MARK I. JOHNSON
STAFF WRITER
Last updated: Mar 5, 02:14 AM

EDGEWATER — George Surls was philosophical about the yellow ticket in hishand as he walked back toward his motorcycle along U.S. 1 Tuesday morning.”I broke the law and got caught,” the Lawrence, Kan., resident said.

Surls, who was in town for his first Bike Week, will spend the rest of the10-day festival walking after receiving a criminal citation for ridingwithout the proper endorsement on his driver’s license.

He and his wife, Stacy, were netted in local law enforcement’s effort tocrack down on illegal motorcycle operations. But unlike many of those cited,what could have been a $44 ticket for noisy pipes turned into a visit with ajudge.

Area lawmen said the strict enforcement is needed to address the concerns ofSoutheast Volusians, whose primary complaint is the noise. While the roar ofa set of straight pipes might be music to the ears of some, others wouldlike to muffle things a bit.

“We are trying to satisfy the year-around residents as well as the tourismaspects of Bike Week,” Sgt. Tom Hoover said. “Some motorcycles are extremelyloud.”

Edgewater Police Chief Mike Ignasiak was more direct.”The people are fed up with riders cranking up their pipes at 1 or 2 a.m. intheir neighborhoods,” he said.

“It has been going very well,” he said Tuesday. “During the first three daysof Bike Week, the traffic section wrote 87 citations. If you count the roadpatrol, I believe there are another 70 out there. That is more than triplewhat is issued during a normal week. But then our traffic is about 10 timeswhat it normally is.”

The infractions range from illegal equipment — such as the noisy motorcyclemufflers — to speeding, running stops signs and other safety violations.

“We had one guy clocked going 97 mph in a 55 mph zone in the pouring rain,”Ignasiak said, “and when we pulled him over, he wanted a break because hepulled over.”

FINANCIAL REWARDS OF BIKE WEEK DOWNThe 23-year-old from Orlando said her tips from Bike Week visitors are a bit lower than she expected.

“We’re still making money,” she said, “just not as much as it should be.”

Rain during four of the first five days of the motorcycle festival has dampened sales, threatening to cut into the $260 million the event annually pumps into the economy, according to some nervous entrepreneurs.

“This is the slowest Bike Week I’ve ever had,” said Deyton Peyton, who has run a hot-dog stand outside the Full Moon Saloon on Main Street the past 15 years.

Peyton said so far he’s struggling to make the $500 daily cost for rent and various city and health department licenses.

“That’s a lot of $2 hot dogs,” he said.

He’s also got more competition this year: 26 food vendors on Main Street, double last year’s number, vie for business from the crowd, which usually reaches about 500,000 bikers.

Nancy Silcox, owner of the Caribbean Trading Co. clothing store on Main Street, said about a third of her annual revenues come from Bike Week; this year, business might be down 35 percent.

Farther down the street, Jerry Berkowitz — whose Good Sports company owns a half-dozen stores and equal number of vending operations on Main Street — remained cautiously optimistic.

“The rain might be keeping some people inside their hotel rooms,” he said.

Bikers were staying in their rooms at the 17-unit Famous Shores Motel on South Atlantic Avenue in Daytona Beach Shores where owner Mark Zdunek kept a nervous eye on the cloudy sky Tuesday morning. He hasn’t had any cancellations yet because of the bad weather.

Mark Soskin, an economist at the University of Central Florida’s campus in Daytona Beach, said a depressed national economy, the threat of war, and even the record high gas prices also might be keeping crowds down.

“We get a ton of people from the North and Midwest,” he said. “Maybe bikes get great gas mileage, but a lot them are towing their bikes behind a trailer.”

Doug Chandler, 51, an electrician from Hermann, Mo., brought his Harley-Davidson to Bike Week on a trailer.

“I’ll take a warm rain over a cold dry spell any day,” he said while holding onto a cold beer can on the deck of a Main Street cafe. “I just got my Harley and I wanted to see what this was all about.”

Chandler said going to Bike Week is like visiting Las Vegas. “You want to do it once in your life,” he said. “Now that I’ve seen it, I plan to make it an annual thing.”

— Staff writer Aaron London contributed to this story.

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