Continued From Page 2

QUOTE OF THE DAY — “Life isn’t like a box of chocolates…it’s more like a jar of jalapenos. What you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.”

–from Christ T

NAG, NAG, NAG– An attorney arrived home late one evening after a very taxing day trying to get a stay of execution for a client named William Wright who was due to be hanged for murder at midnight. His last minute plea for clemency to the state governor had failed and he was feeling tired and depressed.

As soon as he got through the door his wife started on about, “What time of night do you call this? Where the hell have you been?” and so on.

Too shattered to play his usual role in this familiar ritual, he poured himself a very large whisky and headed off to the bathroom for a long hot soak — pursued by the predictable sarcastic remarks.

While he was in the bath the phone rang, which the wife answered to be told that her husband’s client had been granted his stay of execution after all.

Realizing what a day he must have had, she relented a little and went upstairs to give him the good news. As she opened the bathroom door she was greeted by the sight of her husband’s rear view as he bent naked over the bath cleaning the tub.

“They’re not hanging Wright tonight,” she said, at which the attorney whirled round and screamed hysterically, “For crying out loud woman, don’t you ever stop?”

BE CAREFUL OF CELL PHONES–Identity Thief. Keep a watch out for people standing near you at retailstores, restaurants, grocery stores, etc., that have a cellphone in hand.

With the new camera cell phones, they can take a pictureof your credit card, which gives them your name, number,and expiration date. Identification theft is one of the fastest growingscams today, and this is just another example of the means that arebeing used.

THE STEALTH REPORT–The big news here in Charlotte is the Panthers are in the Super Bowl! Here at H.D. of Charlotte we are doing two Sportster gas tanks commemorating the victory in the NFC championship game. One is for #77 Kris Jenkins, all pro defensive tackle for the Panthers and the other is to keep here at the shop after it is autographed by all the Panthers. Kris rides a black 2002 Road King Classic and is a supporter of the Run For Breath. He always comes up big for us in the way of door prizes. Congratulations to Kris and all the Panthers! By the way, Mr. Bandit the home of the Panthers is Charlotte NORTH CAROLINA! NOT South Carolina!

The Meanest and I are trying to get a web site up and running for the Run For Breath. Well I should say mostly The Meanest is working on it. She is the “high tech” one of the two of us. It should be up soon with pictures from past runs and info on the upcoming run this year, so stay tuned.

This weekend, Saturday (Jan. 24th) the Easyriders bike show comes to Charlotte. The Charlotte show is #2 in attendance second only to the three day Invitational Easyriders show in Columbus Ohio! Charlotte is a hot bed for motorcycles and local builders. They all turn out for this show for local bragging rites. There is a lot of bike building talent in and around the Charlotte area as well as some top notch painters. So if you are in the Charlotte area stop by. The show will be held downtown at the Charlotte Convention Center, 501 South College St., 704-339-6000. I will have a full report with photos next week.

Hey it is only five weeks until Daytona Bike Wee and that means spring is right around the corner, so get those winter projects buttoned up, it will be riding season soon! Hang in there winter will be history soon!

Later!
–Mike(THE STEALTH)

BIKERNET DESERT ADVICE–A modern day cowboy had spent many days crossing the Californiadesert without water. His horse had already died of thirst. He wascrawling through the sand, certain that he had breathed his last,when all of a sudden, he saw an object sticking out of the sandseveral yards ahead of him.

He crawled up to the object, pulled it out of the sand, anddiscovered what looked to be an old briefcase. He opened it and outpopped a genie. But this was no ordinary genie. She was wearing anInternal Revenue Service, ID badge and a dull gray dress. There wasa calculator sticking out of her pocketbook, and she also had apencil tucked behind one ear.

“Well, cowboy”, said the genie. “You know how I work, you have three wishes.”

“I’m not falling for this,” says the cowboy. “I’m not going totrust an IRS auditor genie.”

“What do you have to lose, she says, You’ve got notransportation, and it looks like you’re a goner anyway.”

The cowboy thought about this for a minute, and decided that thegenie was right.

“OK,” he ventured, “I wish I were in a lush oasis with plenty of foodand drink.”

***POOF***

The cowboy found himself in the most beautiful oasis he had ever seen. And he was surrounded with jugs of wine and platters of delicacies.

“OK, cowpoke, what’s your second wish,” says the genie. “My second wish is that I become rich beyond my wildest dreams.”

***POOF***

The man finds himself surrounded by treasure chests filled with raregold coins and precious gems.

“OK, cowpuncher, says the genie, You have just one more wish. Bettermake it a good one!”

After thinking for a few minutes, the cowboy says, “I wish that nomatter where I go, beautiful women will want and need me.”

***POOF***

He is turned into a tampon.

THE MORAL OF THE STORY: If the government offers you anything,there’s going to be a string attached.

–Rogue

NEW FROM MR. LUCKY, DELTA 88– “Wanted to keep it retro/vintage looking, but using up to datebrakes etc………hope you like it!” said Ed Martin. We will feature this bike next week and commemorate the “Rebirth” of Jammer Cycle Parts.

“Mr Lucky’s”

Here’s a new product from Mr. Lucky’s story. Rigid saddlebags.

COLLIER DEPUTY THREW GIRLFRIENDS’S DRUG PIPES IN LAKE– NAPLES, Fla. – A sheriff’s deputy has been put on probation for throwing his girlfriend’s drug pipes in a lake and telling her to flush a bag of what he thought was marijuana down a toilet.

Collier County sheriff’s Cpl. Stan Cochran, 24, acknowledged taking the pipes from his live-in girlfriend and driving them to a lake in his marked patrol car.

Cochran told investigators he knew he should have notified his supervisors.

“I was going through a situation that I was trying to clear up and I was hoping to avoid any publicity and embarrassment at work,” he said. “I was hoping to resolve it without having to get other people involved.”

Cochran was put on six month’s probation, given a letter of counseling and will have to forgo a $400 raise for not following procedures, according to an internal affairs report.

Sheriff Don Hunter said Cochran, who joined the agency in 1999, could have been punished more severely had he been more experienced and if he had been on duty at the time.

“His behavior on duty is more strictly controlled,” he said. “Off-duty behavior is much harder.”

–from Rogue

MORE TECHS COMING TO BIKERNET–Watch for them. Here’s a close up shot of an early transmission breather screw from Frank Kaisler. Don’t forget it.

WEAPONS CHARGE– A member of the Hells Angels motorcycle club is being charged with illegal possession of deadly firearms and accused of stockpiling an arsenal of weapons inside his Douglaston, Queens home.

Queens District Attorney Richard Brown says 39-year-old Gregory Heine is a past president of the club’s New York City Chapter. Brown says there were 41 weapons — including rifles, shot guns and handguns in the house.

Heine faces up to seven years in prison if convicted of the weapons possession charge.

Brown says the officers found four rifles, two shot guns, 16 revolvers and 19 semi-automatic and automatic pistols. Brown says Heine was returned to Queens last night for arraignment on the weapons charges. He’s being held on $100,000 bail.

BIKERNET WINNERS–I know we snooze some times, I know we could be a little more pro-active on picking winners. But sometimes we really are so busy; we don?t have time for sex. I mean if you had to choose, sex, pick winners, sex, I choose sex, but this week I’ll pick a couple of winners as well. Here they are:

RON VANDEGRIFT from HOUSTON, TX
Suggestion: MAIL DROP FOR US BIKERS THAT WANT TO LEAVE OUR BITCHY WIVES AND HIT THE OPEN ROAD. SOMETHING WHERE WE COULD COMMUNICATE WITH OUR FRIENDS THROUGH BIKERNET AND NOT BE TRACED AS TO OUR PRESENT LOCATION.
Wanted: THE NERVE TO LEAVE MY BITCHY WIFE AND NOT HAVE HER TAKE EVERYTHING THAT I OWN.

I hope this guys wife doesn?t read Bikernet! He?s gonna get a new Bikernet.com hat not even available in the Gulch yet. He?ll be the first.

And for the Cantina winner:

Ernest (BIG E) from Weldon, NC
Wanted: Bikernet t shirt 3x

VL TECH DISCUSSION– The article ( http://www.bikernet.com/garage/PageViewer.asp?PageID=102 ) is very nice, good pics and text. However, with your permission, a few comments?

The bike shown on Page 1 is not a VL, it’s a 1936 RL 45″ (year based on the tank decal). The right side chain is a dead give-away; also the front frame tube, motor top end, trans cover, brake linkage and front wheel also very different.There is also a mistake on how the conversion was done (which I also sent to Shamrock–see rebuttal below).

The VL motor’s front mount is at the same height (vs. rear mount) as the 1937-48 UL and 1936-47 OHV motors, but .375″ higher than the 1948-* OHV motors. The only factory install (1948 U) had a spacer (24795-48) under the front mount.This means that when a 1948-* motor is installed in a 1930-47 frame, the front mounts will make contact when there is still 3/8″ of space under the rear mount. The usual method of bolting down the rear mount first to determine alignment does not work here.

The reason they had a misalignment with the front mount in the project is that when they bolted the rear down first, it angled the motor down in the rear, so both mounts were off. A 3/8″ spacer under the rear mount would have cured the misalignment but also raised the motor a bit.

–Jeff Diamond

REBUTTAL FROM RICH–“I modify the VL frames the way Randy Smith showed me how to in his shop (Custom Cycle Engineering), on Canal St., in Long Beach, over 35 years ago.

With his method of fitting a Big Twin into a VL frame, I have never had an engine/drivetrain alignment problem, nor have I had any frame breakage problems. This is the way Randy put them in, and it works.

As far as raising the rear mount 3/8″ to “cure” the misalignment problem on the front motor mount – while this MIGHT work in the case of a UL or a Knuckle, because of the additional height of the Pan, and Shovel engines over the Flattie/Knuck, there is barely enough room to trim the casting as it is to fit them in. Raising them an additional 3/8″ would render the seatpost/backbone forging in that?area?DANGEROUSLY thin to accomplish this, and allow clearance for the engine. Also, the area would be too narrow to allow welder access, to weld the seam on the other side of the gusset plates. This 3/8″ spacer here is not an option For a Pan, or a Shovel.

Also, some VL front engine pad forgings?are so narrow and short,?that sometimes it is impossible to line the existing holes in the mount up with the front case ears of a Pan or a Shovel, and do not allow redrilling the forging with any material surrounding the holes left. Hence, the reason for adding the 1/8″ thick plate to the mount there, and bolting the rear of the engine up first, then redrilling the front mounting holes, using the ears for a pattern. Adding material to the end, or side of the existing forging alone, to allow you enough “meat” to drill your front mounting holes is also not an option here either. ”

You’ll have to take the heat for the bike picture, I didn’t include this in the article, you guys added it.

Regards, Rich
Visit our website:
http://www.shamrockfabrication.com

WOW! I’VE GOT TO BLAZE–Need to load and roll. Forgive me, if this news is out of wack. I’ll report on the show in the Sunday Post.

Ride Forever,
–Bandit

Continued From Page 1

OVERFLOW CROWD EXPECTED IN FLANDREAU COURTROOM FOR SENTENCING–Anyone hoping to witness former U.S. Rep. Bill Janklow’s sentencing today in Flandreau needs to arrive early and be ready to wait.

The hearing has generated national interest rivaling the congressman’s manslaughter trial in December, when several sessions drew capacity crowds and left wishful spectators standing outside of court.

Today, the Moody County Courthouse doors will open at 8 a.m. The third-floor courtroom will open at 10 a.m.The hearing begins at 1:30 p.m.

Most of the seating in the 91-seat courtroom will not be first-come, first-served, said court administrator Patricia Garcia Duggan. She is reserving 40 seats for the families of Janklow and motorcyclist Randy Scott. Another 30 seats will be for members of the news media, who are asked to meet at noon in the Farmers Room at the courthouse.

That will leave 25 seats for the general public, who will get priority based on when they arrive – if they are willing to wait.

–By Jon Walkerjwalker@argusleader.com

–from Rogue

NEW GOVERNOR ANNOUNCES OFFICIAL CALIFORNIA LANGUAGE–The New California Governor has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the state, rather than German, which was the other possibility. As part of the negotiations, The Terminator’s Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5-year phase-in plan that would become known as “Austro-English” (or, perhaps even better, “Austrionics”.)

In the first year, “s” will replace the soft “c”. Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard “c” will be dropped in favour of the “k”. This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome “ph” will be replaced with the “f”. This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters, which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent “e” in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.

By the 4th yer peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing “th” with “z” and “w” with “v”.

During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary “o” kan be dropd from vords kontaining “ou” and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav reil sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.

If zis mad yu smil, pleas pas it on to oza pepl.

–from Chris T.

Old shots from Bob T.

DON’T MISS THE NEW CANTINA BABES–Join today, get a signed copy of Sam “Chopper” Orwell and a chance to see some of the hottest babes on the planet.

BIKERNET CARIBBEAN REPORT– One more week and we are still knee deep in the new place. I’m saying this since more or less all my time is spent there, so I really don’t know what the fuck is going on in the outside world. So, if the news for the past weeks (and this one) sounds kind of weak, you know the reason. I guess to top that off we are franticly trying to finish the choppers for Daytona, so it’s a fuckin’ full plate.

Speaking of Daytona, we will be there. We have got together with a few friends and managed to secure a pretty cool spot. Indian Larry, Billy Lane, Chica, Hank Young, Fabricator Kevin, Bikerspot and us will be there. The spot is right across the street from the Wreck at the end of Main Street heading towards Beach street (the bridge) so if you feel like it, come meet us there. The Horse will have their headquarters located at the Last resort, and the chopper show will take place the last Saturday of Bike Week, the guest judge will be Chopper Dave.

We are planning on having a nice setup for those of you who are interested in coming to Puerto Rico next December for our event, we are trying to take some time to film a cool video here, wish us luck. Also, the international launch of BikerSpot magazine for the Spanish speaking bikers will happen. There will be plenty magazines to give away, so come on by; for sure it will be a good time.I guess I will be talking more about this as the time comes, also we will be surrounded by the Discovery participants and the two new competitors, yeap, Chica and Hank Young.

By the way, these guys are going to battle it out in Feb. at the Louisville Easyriders show, so get there and vote for what you think is the best.

Anyway, I’m out of here, got to get back and work some more…..

Jose Bikernet Caribbean report

SHOOTING SUSPECT–Baltimore County police are one step closer to finding the reported motorcycle club member who allegedly shot two men at an Edgemere night club on Jan. 2.

Last Thursday, police issued a warrant for Essex resident Michael James Moore, 42, charging him with two counts of attempted first-degree murder, two counts of first-degree assault and one count of using a handgun in a crime of violence, according to a police press release.

Police connected Moore, whose last known address was in the 1000 block of N. Marlyn Avenue, with the shooting of Charles Zepp, 23, of Eldersburg and Timothy McDowell, 38, of Frederick after an argument at Club Tattle Tails in the 2100 block of Sparrows Point Road.

Moore is a Hells Angels member who police believe became angry with the two men in part because they belong to a rival club, police said.

Zepp, who was shot in the chest, and McDowell, who was shot in the right hip while chasing Moore and a second man, were identified by witnesses as wearing the colors of the Pagans motorcycle club, police said.

Both men were flown to the Maryland Shock Trauma Center, according to police spokesman Ofc. Shawn Vinson.

–from Rogue

SCOTT ATTRONEY NOTED FOR HIGH-PROFILE CASES–Scott attorney noted for high-profile casesMeshbesher’s fame goes beyond legal circles.Ronald Meshbesher is known in Minnesota for helping murder defendants stay out of prison and for helping the public understand difficult legal questions.Now he’s the lawyer suing Bill Janklow for money in a civil lawsuit filed by the family of motorcyclist Randy Scott.

“He’s one of the most well-prepared lawyers you would ever run across, a very smart person, extremely hard-working and respected by all of the judges he’s appeared before,” said Rob Leighton, a lawyer in St. Paul.

Meshbesher, 70, is the lead name in the Minneapolis firm Meshbesher & Spence, which is known for representing families such as the Scotts in cases involving personal injury and wrongful death. The top two items on the firm’s Web site tell of settlements of $11 million and $35 million.

–by Jon Walker,jwalker@argusleader.com

–from Rogue

Continued On Page 3

Hold on. This news may be rough around the edges. We’ve been working around the clock to finish the Shrunken FXR for the Roadster Show in Pomona this weekend. Of course we didn’t make it. The seat won’t be completed in time. We got close, so we’re taking the 1928 Shovelhead. I’ve got to get moving though. I’m burnin’ daylight. So let’s hit the news:

JANKLOW RESIGNATION IN EFFECT–Today, Bill Janklow leaves the political stage he has dominated for almost three decades. Janklow, who won four terms as governor, has resigned from the House, just a year after becoming South Dakota’s congressman. The resignation takes effect today.

On Thursday, a judge will sentence the 64-year-old Janklow on convictions of second-degree manslaughter, reckless driving, speeding and running a stop sign for an August crash that killed a motorcyclist in Moody County.

The Republican’s friends and foes say the crash and convictions have tarnished an otherwise remarkable legacy. Former Governor Harvey Wollman, a Democrat who preceded Janklow’s first term, says people need to remember that Janklow gave most of his adult life to public service. He says people have said some unfair things about Janklow.

–Rogue

How a wife should welcome you home–from Ramon

DEAL OF THE WEEK–Clean, stock sought after 1990 FXR for 11,500 obo. It’s in Harbor City, California at Larry Settle’s Shop (310) 326-3466.

WRIGHT BROTHERS RACING WELCOMES THEIR NEWEST PARTNER–Here is Cody Wright, the newest member of Wright Brothers Racing showingoff his latest creation in progress. Cody hasn’t named it yet (someobscure shop in New York already has the Cody Chopper), but Dad Rob andGrandpop Bruce Wright are sure that will be worked out by the Springcompletion date. It’s too doggone snowy in Delaware this year for muchriding.

–Scrapper

1914 8-VALVE INDIAN RACER–This bike was built Fred Lange, “What say we race..??”, Fred said over the phone. Watch for the full feature on Bikernet Next week and info on how you could own a classic creation like this.

Fred Lange
Santa Maria Ca.

HARLEY-DAVIDSON REPORTS RECORD FOURTH QUARTERAND 18th CONSECUTIVE RECORD YEAR– Company sets goal of 400,000 motorcycles for 2007.Harley-Davidson, Inc. (NYSE: HDI) today announced record revenue and earnings for its fourth quarter and year ended December 31, 2003. Revenue for the quarter was $1.16 billion compared with $1.03 billion in the year-ago quarter, a 12.8 percent increase. Net income for the quarter was $182.4 million compared to $150.9 million, an increase of 20.9 percent over the year ago quarter. Fourth quarter diluted earnings per share (EPS) was 60 cents, a 22.4 percent increase compared with last year?s 49 cents.

Revenue for the full year was $4.62 billion, compared with $4.09 billion in 2002, a 13.0 percent increase. Net income for the year was $760.9 million, a 31.1 percent increase versus last year?s $580.2 million, while diluted EPS for the full year was $2.50, a 31.6 percent increase compared with $1.90 in 2002.

“This is the 18th consecutive year that Harley-Davidson has achieved records for both revenue and net income,” said Jeffrey L. Bleustein, chairman and chief executive officer of Harley-Davidson, Inc. “We had a phenomenal year full of memorable once-in-a-lifetime experiences surrounding our 100th Anniversary. Introducing the Harley-Davidson brand to hundreds of thousands of potential customers has undoubtedly sparked the dream of ownership and created new excitement for our products.””As we begin our 101st year, we expect to grow the business further with our proven ability to deliver a continuous stream of exciting new motorcycles, related products and services. We have set a new goal for the Company to be able to satisfy a yearly demand of 400,000 Harley-Davidson motorcycles in 2007. By offering innovative products and services, and by driving productivity gains in all facets of our business, we are confident that we can deliver an earnings growth rate in the mid-teens for the foreseeable future,” said Bleustein.

Motorcycles and Related Products Segment: Fourth Quarter Results

Revenue from Harley-Davidson( motorcycles was $945.3 million, an increase of $125.0 million or 15.2 percent over the same period last year. Shipments of Harley-Davidson motorcycles totaled 77,056 units, an increase of 11,086 units or 16.8 percent over last year?s fourth quarter. The Company?s shipment target remains 317,000 Harley-Davidson motorcycles for 2004.Revenue from Parts and Accessories (P&A), which consists of Genuine Motor Parts and Genuine Motor Accessories, totaled $141.0 million, an increase of $11.1 million, or 8.5 percent over the year-ago quarter. Revenue from General Merchandise, which consists of MotorClothes( apparel and collectibles, totaled $50.7 million, a decrease of $4.1 million or 7.4 percent. Excluding revenue from 100th Anniversary products in 2002?s fourth quarter, the P&A growth rate would have been 20.3 percent over last year?s fourth quarter and the General Merchandise growth rate would have been 20.0 percent over the same period.

Gross margin was 35.9 percent of revenue, down slightly from the prior year?s 36.1 percent. Gross margin was negatively impacted by a higher proportion of Sportster( motorcycle shipments and higher manufacturing costs, but partially offset by favorable foreign currency exchange. Fourth quarter operating margin improved to 21.5 percent in 2003 from 20.7 percent in 2002.

Motorcycle Retail Sales Data

Retail sales of Harley-Davidson( motorcycles for the year 2003 grew 8.8 percent in the U.S., 6.7 percent in Europe, and 9.0 percent in Japan compared to 2002. Based on the information currently available, Harley-Davidson?s full year market share for the 651cc and up segment is expected to grow in all of the Company?s major markets. ?Given the economic climate during the past year, we are pleased with our retail growth,” said Bleustein.

“Although our U.S. dealer network experienced a modest decline in motorcycle sales in the fourth quarter as compared to last year?s fourth quarter, we believe it is difficult to draw meaningful conclusions from this comparison. The urgency to buy a 100th Anniversary motorcycle prior to the celebrations, along with an unusually late shipment plan for ’04 motorcycles, created two very different selling environments. We are confident that 2004 will be another strong year for Harley-Davidson due to current dealer confidence, momentum from the 100th Anniversary and improving economic indicators,” Bleustein added.

FAMOUS LAND SHARK FOR SALE–Hey Homez appreciate you helping me out.Hope all is going well with your FXR assy.Here is the lowdown on da Shark……

Landshark for sale.Tom Foster is selling his beloved Landshark to complete other projects.The shark has been featured on “American Thunder” and Road and Tracks “The Ride of your life” Television shows. It was also Featured and coverbike with Hot Rod Bikes magazine,with upcoming features in 2 international magazines. Multi show winninghandcrafted masterpiece. Full “PIMP” status guaranteed upon purchase. Offered at $50,000.

Call 323-428-5830
Tom Foster

BRAKE WARNING–Below is the email from Chuck regarding the brakes. Apparently it is on 2000 and newer models. Please forward this on to all riders you know. We are trying to gather as much information as possible to find out what the real deal is. I’m sure that there are many people out there that have had the same experience as we did, but didn’t realise what was truly happening.

Thanks for your interest and helping to keep us all safe.

–Julie

Recently while on a ride through Colorado, the brakes failed on my FLTR. It’s a ’00, with the four piston calipers. We got the bike to the Green River dealership in Wyoming, where the mechanic bled the brakes said that was all he could do, and that it is a real common problem with Harleys when they are ridden in the mountains. The mechanic stated that he must have worked on fifty bikes so far that month with the same problem. (This was the week following Sturgis when everyone would be riding home) The brakes still weren’t 100%, so I called the dealer in Ft. Collins, and the service writer there told me the exact same thing, that it is a real common problem, and they fix bikes all the time for that reason. We discovered our problem (riding two up on vacation) when we were attempting to slow down for a corner, ended up blowing through oncoming traffic lanes, and in the gravel at the top of a steep embankment. Disconcerting to say the least.

What I am requesting is that if ANYONE has had brake problems with the four piston calipers, that they shoot me an e-mail to BLKGLIDE@aol.com, and give me a little background on what happened, and what was done to fix it, if anything. H-D says they know nothing of the problem, what two dealers told says otherwise.Thanks for any help anyone can give me on this.

–Chuck

Official response: They told me that if the brakes were getting soft and spongy, I needed to take the time to pump the brake pedal a few times, and everything would be OK.

TOOL SHOP LORE– HAMMER: Originally employed as a weapon of war, the hammer nowadays is used as a kind of divining rod to locate expensive parts not far from the object we are trying to hit.

MECHANIC’S KNIFE: Used to open and slice through the contents of cardboard cartons delivered to your front door; works particularly well on boxes containing seats and motorcycle jackets.

ELECTRIC HAND DRILL: Normally used for spinning steel Pop rivets in their holes until you die of old age, but it also works great for drilling mounting holes in fenders just above the brake line that goes to the rear wheel.

PLIERS: Used to round off bolt heads.

HACKSAW: One of a family of cutting tools built on the Ouija board principle. It transforms human energy into a crooked, unpredictable motion, and the more you attempt to influence its course, the more dismal your future becomes.

VISE-GRIPS: Used to round off bolt heads. If nothing else is available, they can also be used to transfer intense welding heat to the palm of your hand.

OXYACETELENE TORCH: Used almost entirely for lighting various flammable objects in your garage on fire. Also handy for igniting the grease inside a brake drum you’re trying to get the bearing race out of.

WHITWORTH SOCKETS: Once used for working on older British cars and motorcycles, they are now used mainly for impersonating that 9/16 or 1/2 socket you’ve been searching for the last 15 minutes

DRILL PRESS: A tall upright machine useful for suddenly snatching flat metal bar stock out of your hands so that it smacks you in the chest and flings your beer across the room, splattering it against that freshly painted part you were drying.

WIRE WHEEL: Cleans rust off old bolts and then throws them somewhere under the workbench with the speed of light. Also removes fingerprint whorls and hard earned guitar calluses in about the time it takes you to say, Ouc….

HYDRAULIC FLOOR JACK: Used for lowering a motorcycle to the ground after you have installed your new front disk brake setup, trapping the jack handle firmly under the front fender.

–from Gene Koch

Continued On Page 2

Bill Bish, the rider behind the Coast To Coast Biker News.

THE AIM/NCOM MOTORCYCLE E-NEWS SERVICE is brought to you by Aid to Injured Motorcyclists (A.I.M.) and the National Coalition of Motorcyclists (NCOM), and is sponsored by the Law Offices of Richard M. Lester. For more information, call us at 1-(800) ON-A-BIKE or visit us on our website at http://www.ON-A-BIKE.com

COAST TO COAST BIKER NEWS
Compiled & Edited by Bill Bish,
National Coalition of Motorcyclists

EPA SETS EMISSIONS STANDARDS FOR STREET BIKES On December 23, 2003 the Environmental Protection Agency announced the first new emission standards for highway motorcycles in 25 years, but certain concessions from the federal regulatory agency indicate that three years of opposition and resistance from America’s motorcycle rights network has succeeded in producing a more palatable ruling.

By 2010, motorcycle manufacturers will be required to slash tailpipe emissions by more than 80 percent by using improved technologies such as secondary air injection, electronic fuel injection systems, liquid cooling and catalytic converters, though none of those technologies are mandated in the new regulations.

These reductions will be phased in over a two-tier implementation plan that will require manufacturers of on-highway motorcycles, small scooters and mopeds to meet strict new emissions limits by 2006, and even more stringent levels set for 2010.

New motorcycles over 280 cc’s sold in the United States beginning in 2006 must emit no more than 1.4 grams per kilometer of hydrocarbons (HC) and nitrogen oxides (NOx), and levels of those pollutants must be cut to .8 g/km by 2010. Previously, motorcycles were allowed up to 5.0 grams per kilometer traveled of HC, and NOx was unregulated. Allowable carbon monoxide levels will remain unchanged at 12 g/km. Manufacturers will be allowed to “average” the emissions levels of the bikes they produce, so cleaner running models can make up for more pollutant counterparts.

Sections of the rule dealing with customization were most impacted by riders’ efforts, and the EPA contends that the new regulations will not have any adverse affect on the aftermarket industry. Nothing in the new regulations will change what owners may do legally to customize their motorcycles, they claim, though it’s important to note that it’s already a violation of the Clean Air Act to tamper with pollution control equipment.

Also, small volume manufacturers who build fewer than 3,000 motorcycles a year, and who have fewer than 500 employees, are exempted from the first-tier pollution limits until 2008, and will not be required to meet the second-tier standards at all. There is also a one-time exemption for the owner/builder of a kit bike.

The new federal regulations are based largely on emissions standards already taking effect in California for the 2004 model year, except on a two-year delay basis, though California’s regulations do not allow for these exemptions.

All in all, motorcycling activists can be proud of their efforts to protect their rights as consumers and the liberties of our lifestyle. But rest assured that the fight ain’t over, and the EPA intends to revisit the street bike regs in 2006.

EMISSIONS TESTING IN TENNESSEE MAY INCLUDE MOTORCYCLES Based on the fact that the federal EPA will begin enforcing strict new emissions regulations on motorcycle manufacturers in two years, Knox County officials might include motorcycles in a mandatory emissions testing law likely to be enacted this year in Tennessee.?

The current standard for hydrocarbon emissions from motorcycles allow about 90 times more emissions than the standard for passenger cars, according to the EPA, and when new truck and car standards take effect next year, new SUVs will be meeting hydrocarbon emission targets that are about 95 percent cleaner than the typical motorcycle.

Lynne Liddington, Knox County’s air quality management director, said officials haven’t previously considered testing motorcycles, but “We can always put it on the table.”

Knox and 10 surrounding counties are under the regulatory gun to take steps to clean up East Tennessee’s smoggy skies by March 1, 2005 or face sanctions that could include the loss of federal highway funds and stricter pollution controls on industry. The EPA has put the area on notice that East Tennessee skies likely will be out of compliance with new ozone standards that take effect in April. Ground-level ozone, a colorless gas created by combustion, is the primary component of smog. Knox County officials want emissions testing implemented statewide.

“Whether motorcycles are included or not,” Liddington said, “the biggest pollution sources – coal-fired power plants and tractor trailers – won’t be covered under any testing program.”

“It’s obvious that the new EPA regulations are already being factored into new government regulations at the state level,” points out Steve Lundwall, State Director of CMT/ABATE of Tennessee and a member of the National Coalition of Motorcyclists (NCOM) Board of Directors. “When bikes which comprise an extremely small percentage of registered vehicles and an even smaller percentage of the pollution are singled out and it is stated that the biggest polluters won’t be included in the testing program, it becomes very clear that we are vulnerable no matter how insignificant the initial threat seems.”

According to the Tennessee Department of Safety, there are 6,772 motorcycles registered in Knox County, which is a little less than 2 percent of all registered vehicles, though that number triples every June when the Honda Hoot attracts up to 20,000 motorcyclists to Knoxville from across the country during the height of smog season.

“Here in Tennessee we will fight to protect motorcycle businesses, tourism, ourselves and our liberties,” concludes Lundwall.

“ORGAN DONOR” BILL AMENDED, KILLED IN COMMITTEE AB 1200 started out as a nice, “clean” helmet modification bill, allowing motorcyclists 18 and older the option of wearing a helmet in California. Then, just one week before the measure was to be heard in the Assembly Transportation Committee, the bill was amended to include mandatory organ donation as a requirement to ride free.

The bill’s author, Assemblyman John Longville (D-San Bernardino) amendedthe bill without consulting the bill’s sponsor, ABATE of California, in a misguided effort to find a “creative solution” to help the bill gain the votes needed to pass.?

Obviously, this was one solution that didn’t sit well with the riding community, and when the bill was heard in committee on January 12, in front of a room packed with motorcyclists from all over the Golden State, AB 1200 was further amended to remove the offensive amendment and any reference to organ donation. The original bill language was then voted on and the bill lost by 9 aye votes to 11 no votes.?

Hundreds of riders who rallied at the Capitol that day had hoped that a motorcycle-riding governor would aid their cause, and some carried signs asking Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger to “Terminate the Helmet Law.”

Despite the setback, Jean Hughes, legislative director of ABATE, told the Sacramento Bee newspaper, “We’ll be back.”

HELMET LAWS DETER TOURISM When concerned out of state riders began writing to the Nebraska Tourism Division seeking their support in shelving the state’s mandatory helmet law (LB303), the director agreed that more riders would travel through their state if helmets were optional.

“You are not alone,” wrote Dan Curran, Director of the Nebraska Division of Travel and Tourism, in response to a letter from Richard Hall from ABATE of California, “there are a number of people that want the law modified or removed. In my job, I can’t lobby for or against the issue. But, you are correct, we would see a positive economic impact during the annual Sturgis migration with a more liberal helmet law.”

BIKERS WANT TO PARADE TOPLESS On December 15, the Massachusetts House of Representatives engrossed H 206, a bill to exempt motorcyclists participating in public parades from the helmet law.

“House, No. 206 now goes over to the Senate for its action,” said Paul Cote, legislative director for the MMA of Massachusetts. “Maybe when the MMA storms the statehouse on Thursday, May 20, 2004 – we’ll have a ‘parade!’ I like that idea!”

“GET YOUR ROCKS OFF”? OUR ROADS!” ABATE of Pennsylvania has sponsored a bill to require trucks to cover their loads to prevent spills and road hazards. Representative Stan Saylor introduced HB 880 to increase the fines for violations and further defines what the violations are.

“Those from the trucking industry still maintain that enforcement is the problem and that the current law is sufficient,” said John Mullendore, Legislative Coordinator for ABATE and a member of the NCOM Board of Directors. However, as ABATE’s lobbyist Charles Umbenhauer points out, enforcement wasn’t a problem when it came to helmets so he isn’t buying that argument.

“We’re not looking to drive a wedge between bikers and truckers,” said Mullendore, adding that they hope to come to an agreement between the two groups. “Some of the biggest violators are weekend movers in pickups and people hauling mulch and the like. These too are included in the law.”

WEIRD NEWS OF THE MONTH: A Taiwanese motorcycle mechanic has confessed to police that he feasted on the body parts of an insurance agent after killing her. The discovery of the missing woman’s scooter near a Taipei bike shop led police to suspect the 39-year-old wrench, and when police searched the area around his workshop, they discovered Ms. Shih Chin-chi’s dismembered body in a residential water tank.

Police said the suspect strangled his 28-year-old victim with a rope before chopping her body into eight pieces on Dec 7. Parts of her body, including flesh and skin in the chest area, were missing, reported the Taipei Times.

According to statements given by Kwang Teh-chiang, an apprentice at the cycle shop, the suspect had gotten into an argument with the victim over some insurance matters at the shop and he killed her in his presence. Police told reporters that Chen had searched her body for valuables after the murder and handed Kwang NT$400 ($20US), presumably to buy him off.

Police also suspect the mechanic of being involved in the disappearance of another female insurance agent 12 years ago.

QUOTABLE QUOTE: “In the rush to cure all the ills to which humans are heir, liberty is too often an innocent bystander, and an accidental casualty.”

Barry Goldwater, former Arizona senator and presidential candidate (1909-98)

NCOM CONVENTION REMINDER The National Coalition of Motorcyclists will hold their 19th annual NCOM Convention from May 6 to 8, 2004, at the Biltmore Hotel, 401 South Meridian Avenue, in Oklahoma City, OK, hosted by ABATE of Oklahoma and the Oklahoma Confederation of Clubs. For room reservations, call (800) 522-6620 and mention NCOM for the special room rate of $70.64, including tax, for up to four folks per room. Convention registration is $75.00 and includes the Silver Spoke Awards Banquet on Saturday night, or $40.00 without the banquet. For additional information, or to pre-register, contact NCOM at (800) 525-5355.

Continued From Page 2

BIKERNET HISTORY LESSON–Do you know what happened in 1850? California became a state. Back then, the state had no electricity, no money, there were gun fights in the middle of the streets, and almost everyone spoke Spanish. So it was just like California today. Only back then the women had real tits.

–from Ramon

ROGUE BAD COP INVESTIGATION–Court papers filed reporting 104 sex acts committed by cops Pennsylvania – A motion filed late yesterday in federal court reveals shocking new details about 104 sordid sex acts committed by Pennsylvania state troopers, including three former majors, one of whom raped and forcibly performed oral sex on a female subordinate.

The documents also, for the first time, identify the majors, give lurid details of their offenses and describe the lenient punishments the state police imposed on them as well as 19 other troopers.

Of those 104 cases from 1995 to 2001, allegations in 24 were sustained; attorney Thomas Sheridan wrote in the 59-page motion.Of the 24 sustained cases, only two troopers were dismissed, the motion says.

“The most outrageous cases involved the three majors, the rank below deputy commissioner,” Sheridan said.”All three should have been fired for their crimes. Instead, two were allowed to retire with full pension and benefits while a third was ‘counseled’.”He included the internal affairs reports of the three majors, as well as 44 other cases, as exhibits for his motion.

Sheridan’s civil suit also names former State Police Commissioner Paul Evanko, Deputy Commissioner Thomas Coury and Lt. Col. Hawthorne Conley as defendants.Maj. William Dixon not only raped an employee and forcibly performed oral sex on her but he grabbed the breasts and buttocks of another employee and the breasts and buttocks of a third, the documents show.

A deputy commissioner, who was not identified, gave Woodring a “constructive counseling session” after an investigation sustained the allegations, the documents show. Woodring later retired.

In September 2000, a state police clerk accused her former lover, Maj. Roger Peacock, of stalking and harassing her.

She said he even once tried to run her off the road, the motion said.Peacock was allowed to retire with full pension and benefits.The three majors could not be reached for comment last night.

Bad Cop… No Doughnut!

–Rogue

MO’ BAD COPS–Fired cop pleads guilty to sex charges Oregon – A former police officer accused of coercing women into providing sexual favors while he worked the graveyard shift has pleaded guilty to four felony charges.

Juan Francisco Lara, 29, faces a maximum sentence of 26 years at a hearing tentatively scheduled for Feb. 23, his original trial date. He remained free on bail.

Lane County District Attorney Doug Harcleroad announced the conviction late Tuesday in written statement. Harcleroad wrote that he made no deals regarding the length of Lara’s sentence.Lara pleaded guilty to three counts of official misconduct and one count of public indecency, Harcleroad said.

Lara, who has a wife and two young sons, was arrested Aug. 5 and pleaded innocent at his arraignment. He was fired from the police department on Sept. 10.

Police have said he met the women during his 2 1/2 years as a patrol officer. He met two of them while responding to calls for service at their respective homes. He later returned and engaged in sex acts while on duty and in uniform, investigators have said.

He met two other women as they left a downtown bar at closing time.

The indictment charged that Lara coerced a 40-year-old Eugene woman into performing oral sex last April. It said he threatened to use his position as a police officer to affect her negatively if she did not participate.

The indictment also refers to two separate occasions between June 26 and July 4 when Lara allegedly forced a 41-year-old woman to engage in oral sex against her will.

He was also accused of engaging in oral sex in a public place sometime between Aug. 5, 2001, and Dec. 31, 2002.

Magana, 40, is being held at the Lane County Jail on $4.2 million bail. He has pleaded innocent to allegations that he sexually assaulted or raped 15 different women during his time as a patrol officer.

Magana, who has since been fired from the department, faces life in prison if convicted of all counts.

His trial is scheduled for next month.

–from Rogue

BIKERNET MIDDLE EAST RELATIONS– We have been informed that the Arabs do not like to be called “towel heads”.

The item they wear on their heads is actually a small sheet.Effective immediately, please call them “little sheet heads.”

Thank you for your cooperation.

–from Helen Wolfe

HARLEY PROJECT–My project is moving along? This is about where I am going to stop for awhile till more funds. Next step, sell all Shovel parts and frame to get stretched frame and going with EVO motor.

–arturo gomez
bigtuttie@yahoo.com

NEW WHITEHORSE PRESS MANUAL–We are pleased to announce publication of Mark Zimmerman’s new book, THE ESSENTIAL GUIDE TO MOTORCYCLE MAINTENANCE: TIPS AND TECHNIQUES TO KEEP YOUR MOTORCYCLE IN TOP CONDITION, 256 pages, 500 illus, $29.95. Copies are now in stock and if you’d like to order one for yourself or a friend, click onwww.whitehorsepress.com

This authoritative guide helps all riders master basic motorcycle maintenance skills and keep their favorite two-wheel machines running smoothly and safely. Included are simpler tasks such as oil and coolant changes, bleeding brakes, changing drive chains, replacing fork seals and balancing tires, as well as more complex projects like properly adjusting today’s complex suspensions, synchronizing carburetors, and replacing a clutch.

The book is illustrated on every page with color photos and easy-to-follow diagrams that show you step-by-step how to perform each task. Whether you want to save time and money by performing maintenance on your bike, or you simply want to become a well-informed consumer when you take your bike to the dealer for service, you are sure to find valuable help in this book.

You might also want to check out our popular and affordable MOTORCYCLE LIFT for those mid-winter wrenching projects. This is one of the best we’ve seen in price and quality! $189.95

We also feature an ingenious new workshop light called the LOC-LITE which points a brilliant LED bulb right where you want it. Check that out too while you’re on our web site. $35.00

RARE, UNPUBLISHED SADAM PHOTOS–Bikernet has a couple of connections imbedded inside Iraq. Here’s some unpublished shots after Sadam’s arrest. Why didn’t they rat pack the sonuvabitch?

–T.C.

BIKERNET TRAVEL ADVICE–A jumbo jet is just coming into the Tampa Airport on its final approach. The pilot comes on the intercom, “This is your Captain. We’re on our final descent into Tampa. I want to thank you for flying with us today and I hope you enjoy your stay in Tampa Bay.”

He forgets to switch off the intercom. Now the whole plane can hear his conversation from the cockpit. The copilot says to the pilot, “Well, skipper, watcha gonna do in Tampa?”

“Well,” says the skipper, “first I’m gonna check into the hotel and take a big crap…. then I’m gonna take that new stewardess with the huge tits out for dinner….. then I’m gonna wine and dine her, take her back to my room and put it to her big time, all night.”

Everyone on the plane hears this and immediately begins looking up and down the aisle trying to get a look at the new stewardess.

Meanwhile the new stewardess is at the very back of the plane.She’s so embarrassed that she starts to run to try and get to the cockpit to turn the intercom off. Halfway down the aisle, she trips over an old lady’s bag and down she goes.

The old lady leans over and says: “No need to hurry, dear.He’s gotta take a shit first.”

–From Bubblehead

BIKERNET NASA CONNECTION–Still not released to the public, Bikernet reporter sent in this rare shot from the surface of Mars.

NEW ARIZONA MAGAZINE–THUNDER RIDERS– Give me a call at either 602-971-2912. I plan of publishing fiction, tech articles and event coverage. The first issue of Thunder Riders is out. I could use the help.

–Clay Douglas

ROGUE DAYTONA REPORTS– Was that Angel dust I snorted? Ha Ha. Shit it has been so long I can?t remember.

(See Daytona Bike Week Report on the home page.) Those were some good days and I am happy to say that I am still having good days though not exactly the same way.

Glad to see that you got the Jack Daniels part right and we do need to do a bottle one of these days.

It is a little early for items on Bike Week in Daytona Beach to appear in local publications. There are other news items though that can give an insight to were things are going.

A main one is growing Massive Re-Development in Daytona Beach proper. It will affect some aspects of Bike Week and slowly continue to move events more to the mainland and surrounding areas. It’s been creeping on us for some time.

I will send material near the end of Jan. and of course the early part of Feb. Any news will head your way.

I am sure that we will have plenty of good material heading into Bike Week and steady material during the event.

–Rogue

QUOTE OF THE WEEK–“How many times do you have to be hit on the head before you find out who’s hitting you?” Harry Truman

–from Nick Roberts

DUCKIN’ OUT–That’s it for the news. I need to hit the list bad. I’m burnin’ daylight.

Last week a reader wrote about his run to Bolivia. “Just back from Bolivia,” Jim Buck reported. “It was a wild ride all around. You’ve got to love a country with few laws and less enforcement. A few scorpions visited the bano’ in the casa of me wife’s familia. I caught ’em, put ’em on ice and brought em back with me. The three are now floating in an alcohol bath waiting to be molded, mounted and sprayed with a fixative.” See example below.

Later Jim sent us a couple of images from his trip, which I had to pass on this week. If you experience a wild ride don’t hesitate to write it up and send it to Bandit@bikernet.com. Send along low resolution jpg images, no larger that 500 pixels tall or wide.

If your story is feature worthy, we’ll edit, code the images and run it as a separate feature. If not you’ll see it in the news. Each feature story gets a year subscription to Bandit’s Cantina, but it better be damn good.

Check your list, then relax goddamnit and ride.

–Bandit

Continued From Page 1

FLOW BENCH CONFESSION– I guilty. I haven’t done a update on my Flowbench for Bikernet.com. I worked on it, just haven’t had a digital camera to use to let you in on the progress. Excuses are like assholes everbodys got one. Just don’t fire me Boss!!

Anyway in the meantime checkout www.tractorsport.com/flowbench. This is a forum on Dyno’s and flowbenches. It covers one like I’m building (orifice plate) & laminar flow/pitot tube type. This website has been a great help to me. There are many mistakes in the original Popular Hot Rodding ’93 flowbench plans. A guy from MSD made the one I’m building that P.H.R. featured. Also check out www.audietech.com. They have plans and gizmos for flow benches.

One thing I gotta say, building flowbench is whole lotta work. Need to think ahead. Try not to paint yourself in a freaking corner. So be advised.

This e-mail might help till I get my shit in one sock and get on the ball.

–Pablo

Just barely–Bandit.

DYNA WIDE TIRE KIT FROM BIG BOAR–Dyna 250 Fat Tire $2,495.00.Our new Dyna 250 Fat Tire kit allows you to convert your current stock Dyna to a Super Fat 250MM Tire!

BIKERNET SCHOOL OF HARD KNOCKS–Little Johnny’s kindergarten class was on a field trip to F.B.I. headquarters where they saw pictures tacked to a bulletin board of the 10 most wanted men.

One of the youngsters pointed to the picture on top and asked if it really was the photo of Osama Bin Laden.

“Yes,” said the agent. “The bureau wants him very badly.”

So Little Johnny asked, “Why the f–k didn’t you keep him when you took his picture?”

ROGUE FILES ON BAD COPS–Personally I do not see why I was sent this from Bad Cop. I think it’s pretty funny.

Cop suspended for e-mailing his balls to ex-wife Indiana – An Indiana police officer is suspended after sending a photo of his genitals to his ex-wife through his department’s e-mail.

Officer Stan Brown, a seven-year member of the Pendleton Police Department, sent the picture last month.

Authorities say someone alerted them through a complaint.The officer admitted to sending the email.

Brown’s serving 30 days of unpaid suspension and will receive a six-month pay reduction and a written reprimand.

Funny Cop: Meet me in Daytona and I will Buy You A Box Of Donuts

–Rogue

BANDIT’S BEDROLLS AVAILABLE–They’re ready to ship with shoulder straps, the latest fasteners and new installation instructions we shot the other day. Check out the bedroll strapped to the King. Prices are reduced for 2004. Check the Gulch below to order.

BIKERNET BOYS NIGHT OUT– Frank is sitting in his local bar with his buddies, sharing a beer and bragging about his sex life.Frank says, I have great sex with my wife. She’s very vocal, she can really rattle the windows, and most of it really turns me on. I love it when she screams, ‘Harder!’I love it when she screams, ‘Faster!’ “

“Man, you lucky dog!” Says his one buddy. “But come on and tell the truth, isn’t there sometimes a problem with your sex life?”

“The only problem I have…” Frank said dejectedly, “Is when she screams, ….’Deeper!'”

–from Rogue

BIKERNET BEDSIDE MANNER–A woman’s husband had been slipping in and out of a coma forseveral months, yet she had stayed by his bedside every single day. Oneday, when he came to, he motioned for her to come nearer. As she sat byhim, he whispered, eyes full of tears, “You know what? You have been withme all through the bad times. When I got fired, you were there to supportme. When my business failed, you were there. When I got shot, you were bymy side. When we lost the house, you stayed right here. When my healthstarted failing, you were still by my side… You know what?”

“Whatdear?”she gently asked, smiling as her heart began to fill with warmth.

“I think you’re bad luck, get away from me.

–from Dr. Hamster

BIKERNET MOST WANTED LIST–This is Tom Mallory. Tom was a trusted person in several different M/C agendas, such as ABATE of California and a club in Ventura, California. With ABATE he served as the Treasurer of Local #13 and was the clubhouse manager. It seems that one day he wanted to leave Ventura and, in doing so, stole money from ABATE Local #13’s accounts. He stole money from the General Fund, Toy Run account, as well as the Emergency Fund set up to assist Local #13’s members in a time of need. He then cleaned out the clubhouse funds.

No one knows exactly how much money he has gotten away with, as he managed to destroy all the bank records for the last year, however, initial reports list Local #13’s loss at close to $3,000. He was known to drive a white Ford Ranger with a blue stripe at the bottom. He may also have his bike-a Kawasaki Vulcan with windscreen-on the truck. He was known to visit the Edgewater Hotel and Casino in Laughlin, Nevada, often. As you can see, his arms are heavily tattooed as are both his legs. The most noticeable leg tattoo will be his “Rockabilly” cat.Tom has also used the names: Thomas Mallery; Tomas O’Mallory and Thomas O’Mallery. He has brown hair and blue eyes. He’s 6-foot and, at one time, weighed 245 pounds. His weight has drastically changed as he has a drug problem. When he was last seen he weighed approx. 180 pounds. His D.O.B. is 03-23-61 and his CDL is C2264640. He wears glasses most of the time, both indoors and out and is required to wear them while driving.

Tom plays the guitar and has been know to eek out a living playing in bands at local bars. Although his last known address was in Ventura, he has a father in the San Luis Obispo/Paso Robles area in California. He has made mention of traveling to NY and FL as well.

Tom has been know to attend many M/C related events (Runs, Bike Shows, Tattoo Shows) and many different styles of musical events. He had in his possession over 100 guitars and may be trying to pawn them or place them in a music store that sells equipment on consignment.

Please, if you see him, or have any information on him, give Swede a call at 805-650-6502 or contact Scott McCool, President of ABATE Local #13 805-657-2454.

BIKERNET CARIBBEAN REPORT– Man I had a friend come over and he was telling me he read the interview that Bandit did on me a few years back. Spooky….most of the things that I said have happened. Yeah call me fucking Nostradamus or whatever; it’s still weird how things have changed so much in such a short time. On the same line, and as you all know, I’m still up to my ears in the new shop. While being bombarded by e-mails from Hawaii on the Discovery gig with the Ness family and the huge waves that hit this week, I could care less for the Build Off cause they will both win no matter what. Meanwhile two brilliant builders, Hank Young and Chica will have to fight it out, leaving one out, which is a shame since they are both our good friends and they would be very interesting on a second round. Not to hit on the Ness camp, but either way one of his bikes will continue to the next round. Although I admire Arlen a lot, his newer bikes are not my style, but I would have enjoyed a lot more the mega master builders versus the small shop kinda deal. Still I would love to be able to go back to Hawaii even for a couple days and God knows I need the fucking rest! I’m glad for the guys in Hawaii for the exposure, but still wondering when the fuck is Discovery going to show his nose down the Caribbean!

The shop is well on the side of being done. We are already planning the party, not an opening, but a customer/friends appreciation kinda deal. One thing I’m sure is that there will be total mayhem. We are even working on a half pipe for the area; I guess kids will be kids. The graffiti is done and since Daytona is around the corner I’m changing my Bob the builder cap and doing some delayed work on the bikes, there will be a cool surprise for Daytona, if I finish on time….

Since not all is work we have managed to take some time off, skate at bit or even do burnouts on little jap bikes right inside the shop. I guess that’s were the idea for the half pipe started.One more thing, any of the people we buy stuff from please get our new address, it’s:

Caribbean Custom Cycles
2 Acacia street Bldg 1
Monterey Industrial Park
San Juan, PR 00920

Please take note, although we will forward our mail, packages and such from UPS and Fed Ex need the new address.

I have lot’s of news but most can’t be told, you know Discovery building stuff, plans for Daytona and the rampant bunch of envious dicks that try to make our lives harder……I just got some photos from one of my web site fans and it’s worth checking it out, www.prbikeweekend.com”>http:// www.prbikeweekend.com if you can see thru the smoke, I mean.

Well that’s about it for now, there’s still many things to do before we can go and have fun. I still am very tempted to split Hawaiian style, I know Femme Nu is waiting.

See ya next week……Caccia la Volpe…if you can.

Jose Caribbean Bikernet report, news , gripes and bitchin’

Continued On Page 3

I’m a nut, as you might have guessed. I keep a goddamn list going constantly. The list contains freelance article deadlines, parts needed to finish the FXR, a handful of phone numbers and a list of articles for the site. Generally, for a hell-bent-for-leather bastard like myself, the list keeps me on top of the day’s activities, but not today. On top of the goddamn list was the Bikernet News, then an FXR tip, a feature on the first Muscle Steed bike sporting a 300 Avon and a historic piece on an old riding partner Indian John.

Once in awhile the list ain’t worth shit. Best laid plans fall apart when the phone rings, the door clatters and the computer crashes. I haven’t done shit. We better get started before I’m in more trouble:

KILLER OIL TANK– The best of form & function for a true custom oil tank. Highly polished stainless steel & tig welded with battery box (6 7/8 x 3 7/16 x 6 1/8 to accept any Harley battery used on Softail ’97-up). For Harley ’94-up, custom rigid and after-market Softail frames. Contains just under 3 quarts of oil with center fill (oil cap included). Simply beautiful.

Cyril Huze
Tel: 561-392-5557
http://www.cyrilhuze.com

DEAL OF THE WEEK–Clean, stock 1990 FXR for 11,500 obo. It’s in Harbor City, California at Larry Settle’s Shop (310) 326-3466.

Poem Based on events that happened on 1/9/04 at The Blue Bird Lounge.

Cheap Shot

~~~~~~~~~~~

Mother Fuckin’
Cheap Shot
Trouble Maker
Start’n Shit
Over What?

Somethin Your
Drunk Daddy
Said He Overhead
You Didn’t Fall
Far From The Tree
You Got Some Nerve

Throw’n Punches
Over Words
That Were Never Said
One Day Maybe
You Will Learn
To Drop Your Fists
Use You Head

Next Time I
Might Be Pack’n
More Then This
Knife On My Hip

Be Proud Of
Your “Knock Out”
Only I Know The
Real Score
Your Insecure
Needed To Prove
Your Big ‘N’ Bad
Trying To Impress
A Bitter And Drunk Man

So Take You “Win”
Hold Onto It Tight
This Biker Has
Nothing To Prove
No Need To Fight

Respect Is Not Earned
By A Quick Fist
Respects Reserved
For The Righteous

One Day You Will
Come Off Your Trip
Realise What I Say
Is True And Respect It

Until Then Just
Stay Outta My Way
I Gave Up Fighting
With Fists Long Ago
But I Won’t Be Nobody’s
Punchin’ Bag

— by Panhead Josh Of Outlaws World

WORKIN’ ON YOUR BIKE DOESN’T NEED TO BE STOOP LABOR– With the Kendon Stand-Up Bike Lift you won’t spend a month’s wages to get your bike up to a comfortable working height. The Stand-Up Bike Lift is designed for ease of use and economical storage. It is a true one-person lift; the built-in wheel chock holds the bike upright while secured to the lift. The single point controls allow the bike to be raised up with one hand. When not in use the lift rolls on castors and stores in a vertical position and requires less than three square feet of floor space.

The Kendon Stand-Up Bike Lift features a hydraulic mechanism; you don’t need a compressed air supply or electricity to use it. The lift is fabricated from high quality round steel tubing. It features all welded construction with a black powder coated finish.

The Kendon Stand-Up Lift will raise your bike up to a 32-inch working height. It has a 1,000 lb. capacity. The lift is covered by a one-year limited warranty.

650627 Kendon Stand-Up Bike Lift $749.95

http://www.customchrome.com/>www.customchrome.com

Or call 800-729-3332 for the dealer nearest you.

DEAR ABBY–My husband is not happy with my mood swings. The other day, he bought me a mood ring so he would be able to monitor my moods. When I’m in a good mood, it turns green. When I’m in a bad mood, it leaves a big fucking red mark on his forehead. Maybe next time he’ll buy me a diamond.

Sincerely, Bitchy in Boston

HAIRPIN SEAT SPRING– For Solo Seats,Part # 180145.A classic look, this cool “Hairpin” style spring is an alternative to the standard style coil spring found under most solo seats. Sold each.

Price: 14.95 Each

THE NICK SOAP BOX–Here’s an idea that we could all lobby Harley to take up. Since they are an American Motorcycle Manufacturer why not start to make all their clothes and other items in the USA too? I don’t think a pricing argument would hold water given the premium prices that H-D gets, not just for their bikes, for all it’s other products.

Think about it. The company asks for, and receives, our loyalty; it then sells us apparel made in Pakistan, Mexico, India, Indonesia, etc. They are afforded the privilege of making an American machine on American soil and selling the vast majority of their bikes right here in America. They operate in the safest possible part of the world thanks in no small part to the protection afforded by the American Armed Forces which is supported by the American citizen’s taxes.

They benefit in innumerable ways from their status as an American Icon. There are HOG chapters all over the world whose members ride Harleys because they love the idea of owning a small piece the American dream. It is not right that H-D should manufacture anything overseas unless it is being sold over there. Don’t argue that they are simply being good businessmen when they do this because there is more to being a citizen than just waving the flag and saying how proud you are to be an American. Supporting their customers and their fellow citizens is certainly one big way for H-D to show it’s patriotism.

Every one of us has a responsibility to our fellow American citizens to purchase products made in the USA because the money spent flows indirectly to our fellow Americans. There are several apparel makers in the USA that sell their Made in the USA products for the same price that H-D gets for their foreign made goods. It isn’t like you walk into a Harley dealer expecting to get a great deal on a pair of jeans anyway. H-D jeans are made in Mexico by people that make a pittance for their labor. Why should they be even more expensive than a pair of jeans made in America? The only answer is that some people at H-D think more about the bottom line, and maximizing their profit, than they do about supporting the Americans who buy their product.

I’m not here to bang on Harley, after all their T-shirts are Made in America at R.K Stratman in Missouri, so it is possible to buy at least some apparel in a Harley Store that is benefitting our fellow American citizens. All I’m trying to say is that it’s time for Harley to expand on their vision for the next 100 years and bring all their business back to America.

–Nick Roberts

For All Your High Performance Lubrication Supplies.http://syntheticoiltech.com/oil/nicksperformance/

Nick’s Performance Accessories
Independent Amsoil Dealer ZO# 1124190
9608 Tiverton Way
Louisville, Kentucky,40242
phone: 502-548-3023

S&C SPORTSTER–this is a ’68 ….built to play on.The sporty is in a Honda 500 frame. 2-inch knobby on the front, 18-inch knobby on the rear. Extended swingarm and mono shock. 1968 900 Sporty engine. Better photos coming.

–Skoot, from S&C Customs

THE STEALTH REPORT–I was off work today (my birthday) and the weather man gave me some good weather, sunny and 60 degrees! I went out for a ride and while I was riding I got to thinking about what influenced me to be a biker and to get into bikes. Some say you are born a biker. In a lot ways I agree with that, and if that is true what was the first thing that happened to let you know you were going to be a biker?

I would like to relate two of my stories: The first took place when I was in the 5th grade. I was 11 years old and it was summer time. I grew up in a small town in Virginia, where everyone knows everyone. A one percenter had been killed, I won’t go into details, but he belonged to one of THE BIG FOUR clubs. He had served in the armed forces in Vietnam. As it happens, my little hometown was the home of a national cemetery. Everyone was in a panic! The town would be destroyed, people beaten or killed, all the things Hollywood portrayed. The day of the funeral the townspeople were telling everyone to hide from the streets. My brothers and I were smack in the middle of main street (the whole 10 blocks) when we heard what sounded like rumbling thunder. The procession rolled through, and I remember watching citizens peeped out of the store front windows. There were fifty bikes. I remember waving at one of the bikers and he just kind of nodded his head at me. I remember everything, the power, the bikes and the brothers. The funeral went off without a hitch. No trouble at all! The club came to say their good-byes to a fallen brother and that was it! Everyone breathed a sigh of relief except me, I was sorry they didn’t stay longer!

Next, I remember the 10th grade. As soon as school let out, I headed for the local Harley dealer. Two guys ran it, and at the most they kept a total of five new bikes in stock! Unlike today’s so called super-stores, the little shop was packed with heart and soul. I rolled in everyday, and they would let me sit on a bike. They never ran me off, maybe they could sense I was serious about Harleys! There was a butterscotch and a black Sportster, a blue and a black Super Glide and a black dresser. I always picked the black Sportster to sit on. I remember gazing into that black tank. The paint looked a foot deep. I saw myself looking back in the reflection and said, “One day I am going to own one of these!”

I remember telling my Dad how much they cost, $2500.00 for a kick start Sportster and $2,700.00 for electric start model. Yeah, the decimal point is in the right place! I remember my Dad’s response, “Boy you would have to be out of your mind to pay that for a motorcycle!”

Later in life my Dad and I joked about that story. No matter what was said, nothing detered me from being a biker. I was determined to do it. I am sure many riders think back on old times. For me, maybe it was the birthday thing?

Later!
–Mike(THE STEALTH)

MOVING NOTICE- CARIBBEAN CUSTOM CYCLES–The new address is:Caribbean Custom Cycles
#2 Acacia street Bldg 1
Monterey Industrial park
San Juan PR 00920
The number will be the same, plus a new one 787.770-0633

— Jose De Miguel

BIKERNET DUCK CLUB–A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgery. As she layher pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listenedto the bird’s chest. After a moment or two, the vet shook his head sadlyandsaid,”I’m so sorry, Cuddles has passed away.”

The distressed owner wailed, “Are you sure?”

“Yes, I am sure. The duckis dead,” he replied.

“How can you be so sure,” she protested. “Imean, you haven’t done any testing on him or anything.He might just be in a coma or something.”

The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room, and returneda few moments later with a black Labrador Retriever. As the duck’sowner looked on in amazement, the dog stoodon his hind legs, put his front paws onthe examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom. He thenlooked at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head.

The vet patted the dog and took it out, and returned a few momentslater with a beautiful cat. The cat jumped up on the table and alsosniffed delicately at the bird. The cat sat backon its haunches, shook its head, meowedsoftly and strolled out of the room. The vet looked at the woman andsaid, “I’m sorry, but as I said, this is most definitely,100% certifiably, a dead duck.”

Then the vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys andproduced a bill which he handed to the woman.

The duck’s owner, stillin shock, took the bill. “$150!”, she cried,”$150 just to tell me my duck is dead?!!”

The vet shrugged. “I’m sorry. If you’d taken my word for it, the billwould have been $20, but with the Lab Report and the Cat Scan, it wentup considerably!”

–from Helen Wolfe

Continued On Page 2

From TheGUNNY’S SACK

Well folks, here we are again. Right now, it’s snowing to beat the band and I’m in Portland, Oregon, fer cryin’ out loud! There are around seven inches on the ground right now and doesn’t look like it’s gonna stop. It’s not supposed to snow THIS much here. On top of that we have freezing rain and sleet, and there’s a thick layer of ice on the pavement. A whole bunch of us, including myself and our AIM Attorney Sam Hochberg, couldn’t get a flight out to attend the NCOM Regional Meeting in Sacramento, California, but I heard it was a good one. Even without our Oregon congregation, the rooms were packed with concerned riders from the region. Good to hear, but I sure wish I coulda been there!

JAKARTA: Looks like the local companies who manufacture motorcycles in Indonesia aren’t looking for new investment, even though the demand is rising there, according to this story I saw online from the Jakarta Post. What’s the reason? Well, they don’t need new investors because they’re SELLING damn near THREE MILLION BIKES A YEAR over there! Again I say, why not here? Why is the rest of the world building and riding more and more bikes and all we get is more SUV’s? Not to mention NHTSA, EPA and the guverment doing their level best to kick bikes off the roads altogether.

LOS ANGELES: The 2003 BMW R 1150 R Rockster is one of BMW’s most stylish and agile scooters. In a new film called “Paycheck”, this BIKE will join a cast that includes Ben Affleck and Uma Thurman. The $10,790 BMW moves real fast when things get sticky. Might be a movie to go see. This bike was recently introduced in the USA from Europe and I’m told the thing is quick as scat.

FLANDREAU, S.D.: A few weeks before this writing, Rep. Bill Janklow filed a motion asking that he either be acquitted of second-degree manslaughter or granted a new trial, claiming prosecutors didn’t present enough evidence to convict him of manslaughter when he killed a biker because he was speeding and had run through a stop sign. Next is liable to be an appeal. It’s time to quit playing games and hold him responsible for his actions.

As of Thursday evening Bill Janklow, one of South Dakota’s most powerful political figures for most of three decades, will spend the 100 days behind bars in the company of thieves and drunks as punishment for an Aug. 16 accident that killed a Minnesota man.

Circuit Court Judge Rodney Steele today sentenced Janklow to serve his time begining in Feb. 7 in the Minnehaha County Jail in Sioux Falls for second-degree manslaughter and three misdemeanors in connection the accident. He will be eligible for work release after 30 days but must spend each night in jail. Janklow also received a suspended imposition of sentence, which means if he completes his jail time and a term of probation the felony conviction will be removed from his record.

NORTH CAROLINA: Lying on the ground with his motorcycle handle bar jammed six inches into his abdomen, Brian Shipwash reached into his pocket and pulled out a small box that was broken and bloody, and asked his sweetie if she would marry him. He’d meant to surprise her at her home but the accident changed things for him. By the way she said YES.

A DOCTORED QUOTE: My boss Sam Hochberg showed me this quote recently. It’s the original dedication from Arthur Kinoy’s “Disorientation Handbook” for the NLG (National Lawyers Guild), and it reads like this: “The test for a peoples’ lawyer is not always the technical winning or losing of the formal proceedings. The real test is the impact of the legal activities on the morale and understanding of the people involved in the struggle.” This sure does apply to our AIM Lawyers, guys. Every time I read a press release about what any ONE of them did for biker’s rights, or hear about a good settlement for an injured biker, MY morale really IS lifted, and my understanding IS improved. Along with all the other bikers rights warriors out there, THESE folks inspire us all. Now if I wasn’t such an OLD fart, I’d be thinking real seriously about going to law school, just because THESE AIM LAWYERS MAKE A DIFFERENCE in our world. The least I can do is spread the word. For more info, or for a free consultation on any legal issue or injury claims, call the main AIM (Aid to Injured Motorcyclists) number, and they’ll put you in touch with the AIM attorney for YOUR state. Call 1-800-ON-A-BIKE, or check ’em out on the web at www.ON-A-BIKE.com.

MASS. BIKERS ROAR OVER INSURANCE ISSUES AND FILE SUIT SEEKING RETURN OF $100 MILLION IN EXCESSIVE PREMIUMS & COVER OVERCHARGING: Bikers in Boston are suing the Division of Insurance and Automobile Insurers Bureau saying they’ve been overcharged more than $100,000,000.00 in premiums. “For two years at public rate hearings we’ve brought these issues of coverage not available to motorcycle consumers to the Commissioner and the Auto Insurers Bureau (AIB),” said Betsy Lister of Medford, a member of the Board of Directors of the Massachusetts Motorcycle Association (MMA) and owner of a Medford Insurance agency. “And for two years we’ve been put off.” Now the bikers will be heard I’ll betcha. And I’m thinkin’ maybe some of the rest of us in other states need to take a look at what those insurers are doing. By the way, besides sitting on the MMA Board, Betsy puts out a great biker e-newsletter! You can subscribe to it by sending an e-mail to Gypsypashn@aol.com.

NEW YORK: The NY Times, that is. So a few months back, our story-scavenger, my boss, Oregon AIM Attorney Sam Hochberg, ran into a good one. The Times ran a Living section cover piece about some of us over-the-hill bikers, or at least over-50 bikers, and our bad backs from years of riding, lifting, trucking, or what-not.

The picture showed a biker with his hardtail, and he said he HAD to ride it, as a matter of pride, but he couldn’t ride it very LONG anymore. Some guys I know can hardly walk after a good ride! What I’D LIKE TO KNOW is what we can DO about it! Maybe we swallow our pride a little and get a cushier ride. I finally realized some years ago that I didn’t have to prove anything to anybody.

Any SACK READERS out there who’ve found a better way to ride with a lousy back, can e-mail me and Sam at AIMGunny@aol.com and SamBikeLaw@aol.com , or if you don’t have a computer, fax it to SAM at (503) 224-3869, and we’ll put together a special “Back-Sack” edition if we get some responses! We’ll give you credit for it, and we’ll even give away an AIM T-Shirt to the best solution. The funny part is the name of the Times’ story: “Not So Easy Riders.”

PENNSYLVANIA: In February 1999 a child was asphyxiated while wearing a bicycle helmet and playing on playground equipment. Evidently he was caught between two over lapping horizontal platforms when his helmet would not fit through the gap between them where his body had already gone. Pressure on his chest as his lower body dangling prevented him from breathing.

Parents, this sort of thing really bothers me. Why in the world would any child need a helmet when playing on playground equipment? It was later found that the gap between the bars on the play equipment was too close together and the helmet would not pass through the opening. There are guidelines about that sort of thing that manufacturers are required to follow now. Nevertheless, I can’t say it any stronger, PARENTS ARE RESPONSIBLE for their kids’ safety.

Keep the round side on the bottom,

–Gunny, Oregon AIM Chief of Staff

Continued From Page 3

DISCOVERY CHANNEL PRESENTS THE GREAT BIKER BUILD BIKE & SHOW–

COME RIDE WITH ARLEN & CORY. RIDE WILL START AT MOANA LUA GARDENS AT 9:00 AM. LAST BIKE OUT AT 10:30 AM. THERE WILL BE A $10.00 ENTRY FEE. RIDE IS OPEN TO ALL MOTORCYCLISTS.

ALL PARTICIPANTS WILL RECEIVE A VOTER BALLET TO JUDGE THE BIKE SHOW AT HARDROCK CAFE, ARLEN & CORY’S BIKES WILL BE JUDGED SEPARATELY FROM THE LOCAL BIKE SHOW.

REGISTRATION FOR LOCAL BIKE SHOW WILL BEGIN AT 1:00 PM.WITH A $25.00 ENTRY FEE

CLASSES WILL BE : FULL CUSTOM
OLD SCHOOL CHOPPER
NEW SCHOOL CHOPPER
VINTAGE

$200.00 CASH TO THE FIRST PLACE IN EACH CLASS
ALL JUDGING WILL BE PEOPLE’S CHOICE.
ADDITIONAL VOTER BALLETS CAN BE PURCHASED AT THE HARDROCK CAFE FOR $10.00
BALLETS WILL BE NUMBERED FOR PRIZES
CUSTOM SURFBOARD BY TOWN & COUNTRY
GRAND PRIZE ROUND TRIP TICKETS AND HOTEL FOR TWO TO “LAS VEGAS”

THIS SHOW IS ONLY A WARM UP FOR THE SECOND ANNUAL ” CHOPPERS ONLY SHOW ” COMING UP JULY 4TH WEEKEND…

SWAMP STORY COMING–I just wanted to let you know that the illustrationsare going to be finished by the end of next week. Here is the pencil version of the main illustration. I will be able to turn in both the full colorillustration and the second black and whiteillustration to you by Saturday.

Thanks again and see you soon,

–George Fleming

LIMO RIDING BANK ROBBER–Ricky Beale rode in the back of a stretch limousine to rob a Bank of America of $5,000, San Francisco police say, only to earn a free ride to jail later Thursday.

Beale, 31, a personal trainer, hired the limo to take him from his studio on Van Ness Avenue to San Francisco International Airport, said Inspector Dan Gardner of the robbery detail. Beale told the driver to stop at his girlfriend’s place.

Instead of visiting his girlfriend, however, Beale went to the Bank of America branch at 3701 Balboa St., police said, and allegedly robbed two tellers after simulating having a handgun.

A witness spotted Beale getting into the limo. Police were alerted and pulled the car over at 20th Ave. and Lincoln Way at 11:20 a.m.

–from Rogue

BIKERNET BEDROLLS RETURN–Bandit,What happened to the Bed and Day Rolls? Attached is a pic of me having fun onmy scoot. Thought you might appreciate this a bit more than the averagebear. Jockey shifted Pan has run a best of 13.0 at 103 mph.

Regards, Bob Kotmel

Bedrolls and Dayrolls are back, at reduced prices, in the Gulch. Check it out, they even come with shoulder straps and reuseable ty-wraps. They’re the best.

OUTLAWS CLUBHOUSE RAIDED–At a Christmas party, full of food, family and festive cheer held by the local Outlaws Motorcycle Club’s clubhouse state troopers and local police knocked down the two doors, ordered everyone to hit the floor, handcuffed and photographed each of the revelers, searched for illegal guns, and ripped open their presents.

Police were there on Dec. 20 to execute a search warrant, but they made no arrests and found none of the guns they were looking for. Now the Outlaws claim police violated their civil rights and say they plan to file suit in federal court.

Police were looking for Frank Nelson and were granted warrants to search his car, his home and the Outlaws’ clubhouse at 27 Division St., where police say he is the sergeant at arms. Nelson was arrested in 1994 on a misdemeanor charge that prohibits him from owning guns. State records show that he has nine weapons registered to him, according to one of the three search warrant affidavits unsealed Monday.

According to the affidavits, which were signed by Waterbury Superior Court Judge Michael Hartmere, police felt the search was justified because Nelson had guns registered to him that he is not allowed to have, because he is an Outlaw, and because the Outlaws are known to store personal belongings at the clubhouse. Police also searched his home, and hoped to search his car, but they could not find it.

Kathleen Eldergill is the attorney for the Outlaws. She is also representing five state Department of Correction employees who are under investigation for their alleged association with the Outlaws. Eldergill has said she will file suit on First Amendment grounds if her clients are disciplined.

In the case of last month’s search, she says she’ll argue the Fourth Amendment’s protection from unreasonable searches and seizures.

“It’s kind of scary to think you can be at a party, the police can raid you, handcuff you, detain you for as long as they want to, and then say before you leave, you have to have your picture taken,” Eldergill said. “That’s scary, I think. A lot scarier than the motorcycle club.”

–from Rogue

SMOKE OUT NEWS–I got a call from Goth Girl last night minutes before she was going on the air for a radio interview. She went on record during the interview that she is riding out to the Smoke Out this year. California to North Carolina. Hard-core lady. A car tagged her the day before Thanksgiving. It broke her foot and slid the bike about four feet, but she kept the bike up and didn’t high side. She was back on the bike the day the cast came off.

We talked for ten minutes after the interview. In ten minutes we covered some memories from the last Smoke Out like the little know karaoke debut in the Pink Lady Lounge by Indian Larry (and her admiration for his surprisingly silky smooth singing voice), her past with you (interesting, no further comment- she says hi), favorite movies, past and future Discovery channel plans, music, the wall of death and the major tragedy that the Devil Doll calendar will be six months late or not come out at all this year (I’ll never make it anywhere when I should). A lot in ten minutes but Goth can talk about 400 miles an hour when she is revved (so that is like 30 minutes in normal time).

The party is heating up. I am hearing from many Bikernet fans excited that you are coming and demanding a small gathering of the Bikernet faithful.

–Edge

THE BIKERNET MOVIE DEPARTMENT–I’m writing on behalf of Warner Bros. Pictures to see if you would be interested in helping us promote our newest release, Torque. The moviestars Ice Cube, Martin Henderson, Monet Mazur, Matt Schulze, Jaime Pressly.Torque opens nationwide January 16th, 2004.

Set in the fast-paced world of motorcycle racing, Cary Ford (Henderson)is framed by a long-time rival, Henry (Schulze). As Cary and his friendsmake a run for it, they have the most notorious and feared biker gang in thecountry and the FBI on their tails.

THE BOLIVIAN RUN REPORT–Just back from Bolivia. It was a wild ride all around.You’ve got to love a country with few laws and lessenforcement. A few scorpions visited the bano’ in thecasa of me wifes familia. I caught em, put em on iceand brought em back with me. The three are nowfloating in an alcohol bath waiting to be molded,mounted and sprayed with a fixative.

Beetles as big asmy hand and caterpillars close to 9 inches long swarmed overa tree on the property. A 500lb. Jaguar was takingdown cattle in a back country ranch about 100 klm awaya few weeks before we got there. He was caught and putinto the Santa Cruz Zoo. We made a visit and they hada total of eight Jaguars housed there from Bolivia andthe Pantanal. The zoo housed mostly local fauna;Jaguars, tapirs, Andean Condors, Harpe Eagles,Anacondas, javalinas and Puma.

I got inked in Santa Cruz by a Brazilian artist.Pirata Urbano (Urban Pirate) around me shoulder with askull medalion. Ink is cheap in Bolivia but the workis primo. Got me wife’s cousin his first piece as anXMas gift.

There is roughly 8 B’s (Bolivianos) to 1 US dollar. Apack of smokes cost 8 B’s and a case of brew is 5bucks US. A buck goes a long long way…

The cervesa is a local brand called Pacena’ with a fewdifferent brews. The Pacena Hauri is a thirstquencher. The trick is to drink it quick because inthe heat of the Amazon Basin (high 90’s, low 100’s &humid) it gets warm fast.

The bike scene is for transportation. No pretense justutility. The closest Harley dealer is in Lima, Peru.Most of the bikes were Jap dirt/enduro style, big andsmall. It wasn’t uncommon to see three to five peopleon one bike. One guy was ridin while his young wifebreast fed their baby behind him and two smallchildren squatted on the gas tank. There was a fellowin the back country with a Brit bike complete withsidecar loaded with his family and groceries from anoutdoor market.

Well that’s it for now. Got in at 3 A.M. and I gotta getsome shut eye. I’ll send off a few pix soon. Happy 2004

Live Free Or Die!!!!!!!!!!!!
Jim Buck

NEW BELT DRIVE–from DB Enterprises. I will have better photos next week. My patent will be finished by the end of the month and I will add Japan to it. I already have the provisional to keep everybody honest.

–Dave B.
d.benjamin@verizon.net

Tattooed & Scarred

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Look At Me
What Do You See?
These Tattoos And Scars
Run More Than
Skin Deep

Each One Tells
A Tale Of The Life
I Choose To Live
Some Happy ,Some Sad
Times I’ll Never Forget
Bar Room Fights
Cuts From Knifes
Maybe Even A
Bullet Wound Or Two

The Ink Runs
Deep As Well
Each Mark Has
Its Story To Tell

All Were Earned
By This Man
In Front Of You
Road Rash Has
Claimed It’s Fare Share
Scraped Off Skin
Ripped Out Hair

I Walk With A Limp
Some Old Wounds
Heal But Never
Really Go Away
So I Take Life
A Bit Slower
These Days

Other Scars You
Cannot See
The Ones Of The Heart
Don’t Heal So Easily
Some Wounds
Just Wont Heal
So I’ve Learned To Cope
I’ve Learned To Deal

Greying Before My Time
Wise Beyond My Years
I Just Want A Simple Life
That’s All I’ve Wanted
For Years
A Life With A
Few Less Tears

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

— By Panhead Josh Of Outlaws World.

ROGUE BAD COP INVESTIGATION CONTINUES–DAMN, There sure seems to be a lot of these Cops Fucking Up. And this is only the ones we know about. Sort of like the tip of the iceberg thing.

Bad Cop: Deputy arrested for theft at Walmart Texas – Police arrested Deputy Jose Perez, an 18-year veteran of the Bexar County Sheriff’s Office, Saturday night inside the Wal-Mart store near Loop 410 and Rigsby Avenue in East San Antonio.

“When something like this happens in our agency — or in any law enforcement agency — it’s a blow to all the officers,” Deputy Chief Henry Martinez said.

Police said that Perez tried to walk out of the Wal-Mart store with $500 worth of goods after paying just $70.

The Bexar County Sheriff’s Office speculated that it was just one instance in a chain of thievery that’s been going on for weeks involving several thousand dollars worth of merchandise.

“There’s no definite proof of who was cashiering, but there is some speculation that maybe a relative was involved or a friend of a relative,” Martinez said.

Perez was charged with theft — a class B misdemeanor. The sheriff’s office said those charges could upgraded pending further investigation.

Bad Cop… No Doughnut!

–from Rogue

THE CORK– Two Arab terrorists are in a locker room taking a shower after their bomb making class, when one notices the other has a huge cork stuck up in his butt.

If you do not mind me saying,” said the second, “that cork looks very uncomfortable. Why do you not take it out?”

I regret I cannot”, lamented the first Arab. “It is permanently stuck up in my butt !”

“I do not understand,” said the other.

The first Arab says, “I was walking along the beach and I tripped over an old oil lamp. There was a poof of smoke, and then a huge old man in an American Flag attire with a white beard and top hat came boiling out.

He said, “I am Uncle Sam, the Genie and I can grant you one wish.”

I said, “No shit?” and “Poof !”

God Bless America !

–from Redhorse

THAT’S IT–I’m taking a goddamn break. Should I tell you about her thigh, the bike we’re finishing, the ride I didn’t make, the most recent issue of HORSE or some bullshit Bandit philosophy?

On one hand I want to give it a break. I’ve been strapped to this goddamn computer chair all day, and I want sex, I mean “out”. On the other hand, I’m pumped. It’s gonna be one helluva year. Even Jesse James had a new daughter. The first baby born in 2004 in Long Beach.

So it’s gotta be one helluva new year.

Ride Forever,
–Bandit

Continued From Page 2

BIKERNET WAKE-UP CALL– A man and his wife are awakened at 3 o’clock in the morning by a loud pounding on the door. The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken stranger, standing in the pouring rain, is asking for a push.

Not a chance,” says the husband, “it is three o’clock in the morning!”He slams the door and returns to bed.

“Who was that?” asked his wife.

“Just some drunk guy asking for a push,” he answers.

“Did you help him?” she asks.

“No, I did not, it is three in the morning and it is pouring outside!”

“Well, you have a short memory,” says his wife. “Can’t you remember about three months ago when we broke down and those two guys helped us? I think you should help him, and you should be ashamed of yourself!”

The man does as he’s told, gets dressed, and goes out into the pouring rain.

He calls out into the dark, “Hello, are you still there?”

“Yes,” comes back the answer.

“Do you still need a push?” calls out the husband.

“Yes, please!” comes the reply from the dark.

“Where are you?” asks the husband.

“Over here on the swing!” replies the drunk

–from Helen Wolfe

SKOOTER’S RIDE–Here’s what kickin’ strokers and riding hardtails got me….Now, I got me a button start evo stock…. That’s a x-ray of my spine…..even has a battery pack..The thing that looks like a headstone. Havent been able to ride for over a year now and the doc says I have a year to go before it’s all healed, and I can ride again. Two years ago I kicked my ’68 Shovel, 98-in. and it kicked back. Broke my lower back, but bro, it was a real fast stroker.

HERES THE ’68 THAT WRECKED MY BACK…TOOK ME FIVE YEARS TO BUILD IT.. AND YEAH IT HAD COMPRESSION…12 TO 1, WITH 8 GRAND IN THE ENGINE.

— SKOOTER

BIKERNET NUMBERS REPORT–Just FYI, Bikernet hit all time high numbers for December: 98,000 unique users, 420,000 visitors, impressions 2 million and 5 million hits. We must be doing something right. That number passed newsstand numbers for most bike mags including Motorcyclists at 72,000, Cycle World at 71,000 copies, Hot Bike at 64,000 and we’re creeping on American Iron. Not bad.

Old shot from Bob T.

MR. LUCKY COMES TO TOWN–Mr Lucky’s will be offering an eclectic mix of parts and accessories for H/D motorcycles as well as clothing and lifestyle products for the rider. As we put it; Cool parts for your Ride, Cool threads for you Hide!

As discussed, we acquired rights to the Jammer Cycle Products brand, and are putting together a product line focusing on the retro, chopper/bobber styles of the ’60s & ’70s. Springer front-ends, girders, rigid frames, jockey shifts, coffin tanks, trumpet mufflers, ape-hangers–all the chopper parts that Jammer introduced back in the 1970’s, which are once again the rage.

Along with the Jammer brand we acquired the jammerclub.com website, and are in the process of revamping the site adding the new parts along with wiring diagrams, tech tips etc. drawn from the old Jammer’s Handbook. IT should be cool.

Both the Mr Lucky’s and Jammer collections will be sold retail direct, utilizing the websites, mail-order and participation at events with our truck/trailer rig. Our debut will be the ‘Louisiana Bike Expo’ at the Superdome in New Orleans May 2-3-4.

Check out the site: http://www.jammerclub.com/

–Mr. Lucky

JIM MC CLURE COMIN’ AROUND–I don’t think all of you know that Jim got his new heart on Saturday. It has some rejection problems. They took him back to surgery yesterday and looked at the heart. It’s doing good. They were able to close the incision. He looks good but is expecting more surgery Friday.

Please continue to pray. He is not out of the woods, but the Doctors feel good, and we all know that the Lord is taking care of him.

Charlie Brewton

MYSTERY REVEALED– Joan Crawford’s long lost daughter.

–from Chris T.

The original Stealth, Mike Pullin, from Charlotte H-D.

THE STEALTH REPORT– One of the things I enjoy the most about my job is helping people customize and personalize their bikes. When a new customer buys a bike and takes the rider course we offer, we give them a complete tour of all the departments in the shop. I always tell them that they own the bike after all the paperwork is done, but it really isn’t theirs until they install their personal stamp and fingerprint. Most of them look at me like I am crazy! I may be!

A couple of weeks usually pass and they come back and we talk about personalizing the bike. I really enjoy when the light bulb comes on and they get into it. There is a ghost hiding in every bike, waiting to be seen. Every bike eventually takes on the personality of the owner. I tell people “You only live once, so make the bike the way you want it.”

Some will worry about how much they are spending, and I don’t pressure them to over spend. If I think they’re up to it, I usually say “Well you know what, I have never seen a U-Haul truck following a hearse at a funeral.” The point is to enjoy what you have now. Tomorrow is not a promise to any of us. The ones whose hearts aren’t really into it, find there is nothing more fun to do. Most of us who read this site know what I am talking about.

Another thing, it sure is fun doing something you love for a living. There is a saying that goes “Two of the most important things in life are finding what you are good at and what makes you happy, and if GOD is smiling down on you, they are both the same.” I have this framed in my office and try to read it every day. To me there isn’t anything better to do than customizing bikes and working at something you really don’t consider work!

So keep on chop’n and customizing and remember you don’t have to be on the Discovery Channel to have a custom bike!

Later!
–Mike(THE STEALTH)

RUN FOR BREATH UPDATE–Mike asked me to let you know that the 6th Annual Run For Breath “In Memory of Justin Pullin” will be held on Sunday, July 25, 2004. Ben’s V-Twins in uptown Charlotte will handle the poker run registration. The run will end at Tumbleweeds Bar & Grill in Monroe (formerly Buffalo’s Cafe) where we will have the bike show.

You wanted our contact numbers, so here goes.
H-D of Charlotte 704-847-4647, Mike ext. 112, Meanest, ext 100
Mike’s cell 704-516-4630
Meanest cell 704-651-9055

Our first planning meeting is Monday, January 26, so I’ll update you after that.

Now, get busy on that best of show trophy!!

Love and kisses,
–Meanest

BIKERNET WEATHER REPORT–Spokane, Washington, We’re snowed in – even Mailman didn’t go anywhere today. Now its freezin’ rain, but the blanket of snow is still on the ground.

–Luv,
Helen

ROGUE DIRTY COP REPORT EXPANDS–Maybe the Government Will Continue To Bust Dirty Cops. There is Just Too Many Incidents Like This Happening All Over The Country. It Has TO STOP!–Rogue

Bad Cop: Detroit Bad Cop examples Michigan – In a court filing, government prosecutors say indicted Detroit Police officers planted drugs and guns on residents at least 13 times during a two-year period.

Eighteen officers were indicted last year on corruption charges. The filing precedes two trials in U.S. District Court, the first of which is scheduled to begin in February, The Detroit News reported Wednesday.Wayne Circuit judges already have overturned the convictions of two men based on interviews with indicted officers.

“The officers planted drugs and guns on their victims. They claimed that the arrests of the victims occurred in public when actually (the) defendants entered the victims homes illegally and arrested them. They repeatedly made false claims of ‘hot pursuit’ to justify unlawful entries. They caused bodily injury to the victims and concealed that,” government lawyers John Engstrom and Michael Bullota said in a 50-page U.S. District Court filing Tuesday.

Bad Cop… No Doughnut!

–Rogue

BIKERNET FARM INVESTIGATION–A female TV reporter arranged for an interview with a farmer, seeking the main cause of Mad Cow disease.

The Lady: Good evening, sir. I am here to collect information on the possible source of Mad Cow Disease. Can you offer any reason for this disease?

The Farmer stared at the reporter and said: Do you know that a bull mounts a cow only once a year?

The lady reporter (obviously embarrassed): Well, sir, that’s a new pieceof information, but what’s the relation between this phenomenon and Mad Cow disease?

The Farmer: And, madam, do you know that we milk a cow twice a day?

The reporter: Sir, this is really valuable information, but what about getting to the point?

The Farmer: I am getting to the point, madam. Just imagine, if I was playing with your tits twice a day and only screwing youonce a year, wouldn’t you get mad?

–Rogue

NEW CARTOONIST–Dear Bandit, My name is Rick London and I am a disabled college student inHot Springs, Ar.

I’m also a cartoonist and thought of a fun cartoon that might work forBikernet for a Thanksgiving issue. Please let me know what youthink?

–Rick London
Londons Times Cartoons
www.londonstimes.us

Thanksgiving? Goddamnit, I just survived the holidays.

Old shot from Bob T.

BIKERNET TOP FUEL HORSEPOWER TRIVIA–One Top Fuel dragster 500 cubic inch Hemi engine makes more horsepower thanthe first 4 rows at the Daytona 500.

Under full throttle, a dragster engine consumes 10 gallons of nitromethaneper second; a fully loaded 747 consumes jet fuel at the same rate with 25%less energy being produced.

A stock Dodge Hemi V8 engine cannot produce enough power to drive adragster supercharger.

With 3000 CFM of air being rammed in by the supercharger on overdrive, thefuel mixture is compressed into a near-solid form before ignition.

Cylinders run on the verge of hydraulic lock at full throttle.

At the stoichiometric 1.7:1 air/fuel mixture for nitromethane the flamefront temperature measures 7050 degrees F.

Dual magnetos supply 44 amps to each spark plug. This is the output of anarc welder in each cylinder.Spark plug electrodes are totally consumed during a pass. After 1 way, theengine is dieseling from compression plus the glow of exhaust valves at 1400degrees F. The engine can only be shut down by cutting the fuel flow.

If spark momentarily fails early in the run, unburned nitro builds up inthe affected cylinders and then explodes with sufficient force to blowcylinder heads off the block in pieces or split the block in half.

In order to exceed 300 mph in 4.5 seconds dragsters must accelerate at anaverage of over 4G’s. In order to reach 200 mph well before half-track, thelaunch acceleration approaches 8G’s.

Dragsters reach over 300 miles per hour before you have completed readingthis sentence.

–from Larry Mallin

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