The Sunday Paper Post is growing. Not sure I like that. This was supposed to be a special shot of new, hot news, only for Cantina Members. As the site grows more and more breaking news comes our way. If it’s hot and arrived after Thursday, it’s considered for the Post.
Today has a special twist. Both of the Cantina Cuties partied last night. One hasn’t even showed up yet, the other is too hungover to stand. So what the hell did she have for breakfast? Orange juice and hot and spicy Top Ramen. Hot damn! She just crawled down the hall. Should she receive a leather spanking or demerits. Her actions are hanging up the news and my ride. Let’s hit it:
Lots Of Legislative Movement–NHTSA Want A Survey
NHTSA proposes surveying a random sampling of motorcycle operators, and indicates that “The findings from this proposed survey will assist NHTSA in addressing the problem of motorcycle operator safety. NHTSA will use the findings to help focus current programs and activities to achieve the greatest benefit, to develop new programs, to decrease the likelihood of such crashes, and to provide informational support to states, localities, law enforcement agencies, and motorcyclists that will aid them in their efforts to reduce motorcyclist crashes, injuries and fatalities.”
Comments must be received on or before June 30, 2003, and can be submitted to: Docket Management, Room PL-401, 400 Seventh Street, SW., Washington, DC 20590. Please refer to U.S. DOT Docket Number NHTSA-2003-14375.
Send your comments. I’ll send mine. I believe they need to take a hard look at the number of accidents caused by motorists and respond. “I didn’t see ‘im,” no longer cuts it. Motorists need to be slapped hard for hitting bikers. That’s my thought.
The above news item was supplied by the A.I.M. gang. Check our Bikers Rights department for the whole story.
SONS OF LIBERTY RIDERS E-NEWS
Van driver charged in 02 wreck. By STACI HUPP. Register Staff Writer 05/07/2003.
A Des Moines charter van driver and his employer face 14 criminal charges between them nearly a year after a Tama County crash killed three motorcyclists and critically injured three others on U.S. Highway 30. Gary Butler, 48, allegedly fell asleep at the wheel of the empty van on June 22. The van crossed the center line of the two-lane highway near Chelsea and slammed into six eastbound motorcycles, one after another. Butler shuttled railroad workers from eastern Iowa to Boone for Armadillo Express, a Cheyenne, Wyo., charter company. A grand jury decided Monday to charge Butler with three counts of vehicular homicide, six counts of involuntary manslaughter and two counts of serious injury by vehicle.
The above is what I’m talking about.–Bandit
Gun Manufacturers & the Magazine Ban. The 1994 Clinton/Feinstein federal ban on numerous semi-automatic rifles also includes a federal ban on the importation of magazines that hold more than 10 rounds. Law enforcement — our servants — are exempt from that restriction. As if a cop’s life and means of self-defense is superior to yours, an absurdity beyond ridiculous. That magazine ban is due to sunset in September 2004 when the semi-auto rifle ban sunsets. Certain domestic enemies in Congress are already moaning to renew and expand the ban. Screw them all. It’s time to fight fire with fire.
Should firearm manufacturers pledge that if the ban on ammunition feeding devices holding more than 10 rounds is renewed, they will only market and sell limited-capacity feeding devices to all Government entities as well as civilians — in effect making the government abide by its own laws?
YES? or NO?
Take the poll on left side of http://KeepAndBearArms.com
Female Gorilla Needs Gigillo
A small West Virginia Wild Animal Park had acquired a very rare species of gorilla. Within a few weeks, the female gorilla became very horny, and difficult to handle. Upon examination, the park veterinarian determined the problem: The gorilla was in heat. To make matters worse, there were no male gorillas of her species available.
While reflecting on their problem, the park administrators noticed Ed, a part-time redneck intern, responsible for cleaning the animals’ cages. Ed, like most rednecks, had little sense, but possessed ample ability to satisfy a female of ANY species.
So, the park administrators thought they might have a solution. Ed was approached with a proposition. Would he be willing to have sex with the gorilla for $500?
Ed showed some interest, but said he would have to think the matter over carefully. The following day, Ed announced that he would accept their offer, but only under three conditions.
“First,” he said, “I don’t want to have to kiss the gorilla.”
“Second, you must never tell anyone about this.”
The park administration quickly agreed to these conditions, so they asked what was his third condition.
Ed stated, “You gotta give me another week to come up with the $500.”
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Karen Bolin Takes Charge As New MRF President The Board of Directors of the Motorcycle Riders Foundation is proud to announce its election of Karen Bolin as the new MRF President, effective immediately. Karen will complete the current two-year term held by Buck Kittredge, which will expire in September of 2004.
Karen has been actively involved in the motorcyclists’ rights movement on the state and national levels since 1990. She has served as the MRF Secretary since 1999. Karen spent seven years as the State Legislative Affairs Officer for ABATE of Washington, and has served the past several years as Vice President of Government Relations for the Washington Roadriders Association (WRRA). In the 2000 legislative session in Washington State, the WRRA not only brought legislation that has been signed to protect motorcycle rider education, but was the first in the nation to be actively involved and see success with vehicular assault statutes directly benefiting motorcyclists. In addition to being a sustaining member of the MRF, Karen is currently a member of the WRRA, ABATE of Washington, BMWMOA, Washington State BMW Riders, and IronButt Association.
A Male’s Life Before And After Marriage
WHAT DO YOU CALL AN ARAB??? We Arabs are extremely offended by being called ‘towel heads’. I would like to inform you that we do NOT wear towels on our heads. We wear sheets. In the future please call us ‘sheet heads’. Thank you.
– Yassir Nossair
PRO CLUTCH for SPORTSTER/BUELL
Rivera Engineering’s Pro-Clutch quickly & conveniently converts virtually any old-style coil spring clutch to modern, diaphragm spring function, and is now available for 5-speed Sportster & Buell applications. Pro-Clutch for late model applications significantly increases clutch surface area, for 100% power transfer with no slipping or bogging.
Smooth, easy-on-the-hand operation gives optimum control for all street or strip high-performance applications. Rivera’s diaphragm spring / pressure-plate evenly distributes spring-load across the face of the clutch-pack for positive, no-slip operation! Pro-Clutch fits inside all OEM primary cover assemblies, and can be conveniently installed with no permanent modifications.
Visit our web site: riveraengineering.com
Rivera Engineering
12532 Lambert Road
Whittier, CA 90606
(562) 907-2600 fax (562) 907-2606
State Of Washington Passes Sidecar/Trike Training Bill
Washington State Senate Bill SB 5229: the bill incorporating Sidecar / Trike training into the subsidized portion of the WMSP: signed by Gov. Locke.
Karen Bolin
WRRA Washington Road Riders Association
WARNING LOCK YOUR DOORS!!
Be sure to lock your doors and windows at home! A North Carolina man was found dead in his home over the weekend. Detectives at the scene found the man face down in his bathtub. The tub had been filled with milk, sugar, and cornflakes. A banana was sticking out of his ass. Police suspect a cereal killer.
–from Chris T.
A Female Prayer….
Before I lay me down to sleep, I pray for a man, who’s not a creep, One who’s handsome, smart and strong, One who’s loves to listen long, One who thinks before he speaks, When he says he’ll call, he won’t wait weeks. I pray that he is gainfully employed, When I spend his cash, won’t be annoyed. Pulls out my chair and opens my door, Massages my back and begs to do more. Oh! Send me a man who’ll make love to my mind, Knows what to answer to “How big is my behind?” I pray that this man will love me to no end, And never attempt to hit on my friend.
And as I kneel and pray by my bed, I look at the creep you sent me instead.
–Amen.
MALE PRAYER…
I pray for a deaf-mute nymphomaniac with huge boobs who owns a liquor store.
–Amen.
–from Mary Ann Hart
CrazyHorse Paints On The Sabath
Cantina Sunday Medical Advice A 75-year-old woman went to the doctor for a check up. The doctor told her she needed more cardiovascular activity, and recommended that she engage in sexual activity three times a week.
A bit embarrassed, she said to the doctor, “Please tell my husband.”
The doctor went out into the waiting room and told the husband that his wife needed sex three times a week.
The 80-year-old husband replied, “Which days?”
The doctor answered, “Monday, Wednesday, and Friday would be ideal.”
The husband said, “Well, I can bring her on Monday and Wednesday, but on Fridays, she’ll have to take the bus.”
–from Rev CarlR
MOTORCYCLE SAFETY AND YOU While NHTSA ponders how to protect us from ourselves, motorcyclists around the country have taken a proactive step toward promoting motorcycle safety and motorist awareness by getting the month of May declared Motorcycle Awareness Month. Virtually every state and major municipality has passed proclamations and resolutions declaring May as the month to “Look Out For Motorcycles.”
In fact, through encouragement by the National Coalition of Motorcyclists, biker vanguard U.S. Senator Ben Nighthorse Campbell of Colorado has announced that he will introduce a measure to declare May as National Motorcycle Awareness Month.
While some states, Massachusetts in particular, are advocating the month of March as Motorcycle Awareness Month due to increased rider fatalities in early Spring, the message is clear that motorcyclists want to promote safety and awareness and decrease accidents and fatalities, no matter what time of the year.
With this in mind, it’s important to keep an eye on rider education funding and take preventive measures to block states from raiding our training funds to balance budgets. Massachusetts is the latest fund under attack, joining Utah and Michigan on the chopping block.
A review of the proposed Massachusetts House Budget shows Section 23, seeks to REPEAL GL c. 10, section 35G, the “Motorcycle Safety Fund.” Further review of the line item budget shows the Motorcycle Safety Fund (Line item 8400-0016) has been transferred to the Registry of Motor Vehicles, in general, (line item 8400-0001), says Paul W. Cote, Legislative Director for the Massachusetts Motorcycle Association (MMA).
Cote also points out that Massachusetts motorcyclists agreed to ‘tax themselves’ an additional $2 of each annual motorcycle registration fee for this dedicated Fund for Motorcycle Safety & Awareness Programs. “The Massachusetts Motorcycle Association is AGAINST the repeal of this dedicated fund, which reduces accidents and injuries,” he says.
On a brighter note, due to intense motorcyclists’ lobbying, the state of Michigan has renewed its rider ed funding and added it back into the state budget. Utah, however, remains unconvinced that their “little safety fund” is worth continuing.
As state legislatures nationwide seek budget compromises, perhaps our battle cry should be changed to: “Look Out For Motorcycle Safety Funds!”
The Washington State Helmet Definition Bill
SB 5335: a bill defining a legal helmet in WA. State: signed into law by Governor Locke last Friday, May 9th. The House version of this bill (no amendments) is the enacted version.
Karen Bolin
Snappy Answer #1
A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets. As a man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket, and he opened his trench coat and flashed her. Without missing a beat she said, “Sir, I need to see your ticket, not your stub.”
SAMSON’S New Extreme Series Are Here!
SAMSON EXHAUST has done it again with the new Extreme Series. This new series includes 14 unique and exciting styles that are going to rock and shock the aftermarket exhaust industry to the ground! Included with this new awesome series of pipes are the tightest fitting 220? full coverage heat shields anywhere. All “Extreme Series” come complete with mounting brackets and hardware.
Pipes pictured are the E-504 “Hell Bound” Slash and E-102 “Zoomies”
Please visit www.SamsonUSA.com for the ultimate internet experience.
Samson Motorcycle Products, Inc.
3818 E. Coronado St. Anaheim, CA 92807
(800) 373-4217
The Panhead Is Waiting–Sin Wu is still crashed on the couch. The Blond returned prancing on sexual air. I’m out of here. The ’48 Pan is waiting in the garage and it’s a day to relax and ride. I made it under the deadline wire with my articles for HORSE and Hard Core Choppers. Next week it’s editorial grappling with American Rider and Motorcycles In Retrospect (Antique Bike mag by the people at Celtic Moon Publishing). I need to finish my Sam Tech for American Rider and the Trophy for the Run For Breath. My MIG welder ran out of gas yesterday and put an end to progress. I’ll hit the welding supply joint tomorrow.
Oh I forgot two things. My martial arts master’s ’62, old-school, chopped Pan is in the garage for a 6-to-12 Volt transformation. We’ll cover that next week. Finally, the reason Sin Wu is hungover: She met a girl last night, who I hope to meet soon. Her name is May Ling from the island of The Hahn. Sin wouldn’t shut up about her as she crawled on top of me at 3:00 a.m. I could feel her tingling through all the covers on the bed. Brought me right out of a deep sleep. I love it when a new girl is introduced to the Bikernet Headquarters. Keeps the intrique high and life facinating. I’ll report more later. Let’s ride.
–Bandit
