Life and Times 2016

This may be an epiphany and maybe not. Uncle Monkey explained 2016 at the year’s end. Too bad. I wish I knew this coming in. It might have helped.

UNCLE MONKEY ON THIS YEAR–It has been an amazing year. It was one of those touchstone years that come every 16 years or so. 2000 was the last one. Besides Y2K seems that there was a real technological shift. The next one was 1984.

–the Bad Uncle Monkey

He was right about this year. It was packed with trials, obstacles and challenges. I’ve studied Buddhism for two years and it helped immensely this year. I’m not trying to sell anyone on Buddhism, but I needed a spiritual release and Dr. Feng introduced me to the amazing Hacienda Heights Temple and I learned how to meditate and benefit my mind. I discovered a medical fact. Meditation can help you relax. It can take the form of prayers, quiet reflection, or chanting, but they all work to relieve the mind of stress.

Let’s get back to what the hell caused me stress in 2016. In late 2015, the City of Los Angeles sent me a letter: get out of my building and don’t come back. My fourth wife had returned to the fold and I still dealt with Nyla’s kids down front. My second Chance book needed to be completed, which could be my last book.

Our Bonneville streamlined trike project languished at a shop in Texas. The shop, owned by a good friend, who built Nyla’s magnificent Root Beer Float bobber, struggled in our terrible economy and he couldn’t get to the trike. I had other sponsors waiting. I needed to confront the situation.

Bikernet had issues. We needed to review and rebuild some aspects. The EPA still bugged me and was fucking with our industry. The whole global warming issue was beginning to control every aspect of man in the USA. Imagine if these folks controlled everything in your life, fining you, making you buy certain appliances, restricting your travel, taxing you and haunting your motorcycle collection under the guise of saving the planet. But think about it–none of these restrictions are applied to anyone else on the planet. And we call this a free country. Someone lost the Code of the West.

Moving right along. We have issues in this little third world country between Long Beach and San Pedro. We are the only community on the coast of California without access to the water. I tried to squeeze in some time to help the community retrieve their waterfront.

I also struggled with registering my 2014 Indian in California behind a new rule, of course. And for several years, I have tried to give the side of my building to the community and the port, as a mural, but they don’t get it.

Wait, there’s one more. I always had a dream of building a deck over our patio and it was getting close. So how’s that for the intro leading into this episode of Bandit’s Life and Times? It is now December 13th, so appropriate for a time to evaluate my annual report card. The above weren’t the only focused elements for 2016. There was Sturgis, Bonneville, the Las Vegas Bike Fest, and I just had my left hip rebuilt. And natch, at 68 years of age, health issues became more of a concern. Then a month ago, my 94-year-old ma died.

Add to the above some family treachery, and my grandson had a terrible motorcycle accident on his Dyna. He wasn’t hurt badly, but his innocent girl suffered severe injuries and she is still in the hospital two weeks after the accident. So, what do you think? Could I use a stress-relieving element in my life? Just writing this is giving me the anxious jitters.

Before I report, I will add a couple of other challenges. I want to slow down some. I’ve lived a strange life, usually shaking shit to the core about every five years. I quit my job and go do something else, quit a relationship and move out of town, whatever. With Nyla for 14 years, a record breaker, but we moved after five years from San Pedro to Wilmington. I’ve lived in this 10,000 square-foot, 1923 built hotel for 12 years. I started itching for a change. Could I have one more adventure in life, or could I buckle down and find new adventures here? There are a ton of considerations at this age. I just can’t move to a dinky island in the Pacific and build a marina. It’s not that easy.

Dr. Hamster and I made a pact recently. Slow down, ride more, fuck off more and race more. Sounds good to me.

Okay, so let’s lay out the progress report for 2016. So, for almost eight months I made regular trips to downtown Los Angeles to meet with various members of the Building and Safety Department, sometimes with an attorney, Dominic, who is a member of the Hamsters. This hits right at the center of a lot going on in this country. Control freaks want to control, when they should be helping. Hell, we pay them with our taxes.

It’s almost as if our society has over-done it’s program. These guys should help you build your dream, not stand in the way of everything you attempt with a goofy, constantly changing, rule book. It’s a fascinating endeavor and more agencies come on line to exacerbate the situation everyday. If you live in a small city, it might be more manageable, but when it’s a city of 15 million, everything is out of hand.

Recently out of the hospital with a new hip, I struggled into the back of the Redhead’s van and lay across the back seat, which gave me a different perspective and I looked at city buildings all the way to downtown. So many were way out of code pieces of shit and they threatened me. Basically, I held my mud, listened very closely, did my homework and with careful investigative research handled by the Redhead; we were able to ultimately walk away with approved building plans and a new certificate of occupancy.

I could tell you a ton of wild stories regarding this effort. Hell, I could write another book. So, we get an “A” for survival with the city.

Next, Nyla’s kids have lived in the restaurant portion of the Bikernet Headquarters for over a decade. Basically, we’ve enabled them to live cheaply, and not be forced to step up and deal with life, and it needs to end. Enabling kids is one of the worst things we can do for youngsters. Every day we allow it, they are not making any progress, and often head down the wrong road, because, what the hell, they can, we enabled them. I get an “F” in this effort. It still needs to be addressed.

Okay, next: I went around the world with my mom in about 2001 and started the second Chance Hogan novel. It needed to be wrapped up this year and we did it. I’ve got to thank Bruce Snyder, the esteemed copy editor, and Faith who also ran through the book. Pamelina handled the cover art and Create Space printed the copies.

Talk about a lot of work. I started a new work routine to help with this effort. I would get up every morning at 6:00 and work for at least two hours on the book in the dark. I read and reread this book at least three times. It’s no dime-store novel. This puppy is 180,000 words and 400 pages. So, I’ll give myself a C+ for this effort. But our efforts at marketing suck.

http://www.bikernet.com/pages/story_detail.aspx?id=13113

We are also in discussions with Duncan Keller regarding the configuration. “The majority of the weight must be over the front wheels,” Duncan said and we’re working on how to shift weight.
This could be an historic effort in Bonneville racing and I’ll give myself a “B” for effort and progress this year. We’re back on track.

Bikernet is a work in progress. We shifted stuff around and made Bikernet mobile friendly. You tell me how we’re doing. We have a terrific crew and more content flies at the site daily. It’s a blast, but we seem to be up against the new forms of media, Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Litter, Linkedin, you name it. But we love what we do and how it works, so we keep doing it. You tell me?

Awhile back, like five or more years ago I had a meeting with the MIC regarding their V-Twin Committee and EPA regs. I wanted to help the industry with an aftermarket industry council, but the MIC guys opposed it. Their notion was to give in to any Air Resources regs, make our industry comply no matter what it costs in business or to comply to the regs. A couple of companies jumped onboard and spent hundreds of thousands of dollars and only one company sold one compliant engine over the next ten years.

It all seemed nuts to me. I couldn’t devote all my time to it, but I kept punching the bag, looking for ammo, info and resources to help. My contention didn’t hold water to some guys. I felt the EPA should leave a handful of low mileage modified motorcycle alone. It’s that save on life mentality. You know the drill, we will torture, destroy, fine, tax whole populations to save one life, or to save the planet.

I don’t know what’s wrong with me, but that doesn’t fly in a free society. We want to help folks be safe, but not fuck with them, restrict them, etc. I knew our bikes didn’t have any significant impact on the planet, so leave us alone. That concept didn’t fly with many and we were being fed this climate battle as if it was the gospel, but it’s not.

More and more info is floating to the surface to show that the climate changes with or without cars or motorcycles. And more info is surfacing that might prove the opposite. Did you know there was a major global cooling scare in the ‘70s and now it’s global warming? Bottom line, we are making strides and building a team, since CARB and the EPA are on a bent to destroy the entire performance industry for cars, trucks, boats, and motorcycles if we don’t step up. Gotta give our group a B+ for effort.

Regarding the little third world country I live in, I continue to try to help the community reach out to the city of Los Angeles and the Port of LA to help afford the community of Wilmington a serious waterfront. We may have found a group of young kids who could make a serious difference in this effort. This is an ongoing effort and I have watch old guys pass away trying to make something happen. The community deserves more. I give the Port a “D” is this corner and they need to deal with their train tracks, which threaten to block off Avalon, the main street.

It’s a strange deal, like the evil port wants to take over as much of this area of land as possible to ensure the port’s growth and to hell with the community. But it’s also up to the community to raise hell, and we may have found a group with the United Wilmington Youth Foundation. The young locals need to step up.

Regarding my 2014 Indian purchased from Rich Worley, the owner of American Biker in Charleston, SC. His team modified and painted the Classic Chief, and then he rode it to Sturgis for the 75th. I met him in Sturgis for the rare underhanded run. We rode around the Badlands for a week, and then I peeled for the coast. What a terrific ride, but I needed 2000 more miles on the clock because of a new rule in California.

So this year, I rode with Mike Stevenson on his 2015 Street Glide to Sturgis and back. The story is covered on Bikernet. It was a terrific ride and the bike is now street legal in California until they find something else wrong… I’ll give Rich an “A” for a terrific bike mods and it was featured in Cycle Source magazine.

http://www.bikernet.com/pages/Bikernet_Run_To_Sturgis_2016.aspx

I’ll try to wrap this up, because I’m sure you’ve got the harried picture of my life and times in 2016. I have always had a dream of building a deck over our patio area. I’ve got bids on wooden decks, or even hoisting a container over the building with a crane to form a deck and storage shed. Then Gary next door took over the welding facility and during his rehab efforts, he tore down a couple of metal buildings and offered me the metal.

It sat bundled behind my building for a couple of year. An architect took inventory of it, but nothing happened until I met a cool guy in Long Beach, Paul Cotes, an architect, who could design the deck using my list of metals. “Let’s make it as big as possible, what the hell,” Paul said. Everything took time and money.

I have two other Hamster brothers who run their dad’s family structural steel business out of a tin shed in Harbor City. I took them the plans and they came with a massive flat bed and with a forklift they hauled the scrap away and turned the pieces into parts. Jeremiah Soto and his contractor friend, Craig, came and went to work on the footings. Finally, with the help of Tim from San Pedro Muffler and Jeremiah’s 110-volt flux core MIG welder I built the railings out of aluminum coated exhaust pipe and old street sign. It’s nearly complete and I’ve gotta give the team an “A” for this one.

One other project for the building and Wilmington saw progress this year. I have had a dream for a mural along the side of the building facing Harry Bridges, the largest street along the Port of LA. I wanted to devote the 25 by 132-foort wall to Wilmington and the Port, but I haven’t had much luck with their support. But this year with the help of young Veronica of the Muralists and Robert Trani Jr. from the United Wilmington Youth Foundation, Jeremiah’s son the tagger, and the tattoo artist, we may see the mural completed in 2017. Hell, Gary next door offered me a scissor lift if I could fix it. I’ve replaced all the batteries and rebuilt the charger. We ordered a coil and it recently arrived. We’re close and it will save thousands on scaffolding for the project.

Just after the run to Sturgis, we prepared for the jam to Vegas for Las Vegas Bikefest. For the first time, we set up a 5-Ball Racing Leathers Booth and Branscomb Richmond kicked off the Las Vegas Motorcycle Hall of Fame. I was to be inducted in the first round with Evel Kneivel, Robbie Kneivel and Lorenzo Llamas. As you can imagine, I was blown away. What a weekend that turned out to be. I jammed to Vegas, set up the booth, then Jeremiah Soto and James Conway rode into town to give me shit and hang out. We had a good time, but another mission loomed. Sugar Bear’s wedding to the lovely Fuji was scheduled for Sunday afternoon in Pasadena.

Directly after the ceremonies on Saturday I jammed back to Los Angeles, arriving at 3:00 in the morning, slept until noon, suited up and the Redhead of Redheads and I arrived at the church on time.

In between projects, over the last couple of years I’ve spent more time with my mom. She turned 94 in 2016 and was still spry, active, took art classes and attended community gatherings. But just about a month she was hit with a couple of infections, had her gallbladder removed and didn’t come back from the operation. She passed about three days after the operation. We held a memorial for her at Nyla’s Chowder Barge, the only original floating restaurant on the Port of Los Angeles. Nyla, the Redhead and Monica get an “A” for this event and the holiday appearance of the barge. It was a terrific send-off with family members, brothers of mine who knew my mom and longtime neighbors.

We may be headed to New Zealand next year to take Mom’s ashes to her designated resting place. So, there you have it, my 2016 lock stock and barrel.

So, you see why there’s a serious mission to slow the train in 2017, although I have a couple of goals. It would be magnificent to see the Salt Torpedo on the Salt, to finish my first screenplay, and I have a creative notion to create my first Bronze sculpture of a wild racer on an Excelsior Moto-cycle board track racer for a Hamster Sturgis charity event.

What else might strike the Bikernet Dynasty during 2017, maybe fishing on the waterfront? We can only hope.

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