BIKERNET NEWS FLASH–CONSPIRACY CHARGES FILED AGAINST MEMBER OF BIKERNET STAFFThis is ridiculous. We’ve got so much shit flyin’ we don’t know which way to turn. Perhaps I should just go out to the Bikernet garage… and fire up the ’48 and let her warm up. Since we slipped new pistons in it, I’m trying to […]
BIKERNET NEWS FLASH–HEADQUARTERS OVERRUN WITH WOMENBig week at the Bikernet sweat shop. You know the feeling of having a week that looks as calm as Monday Night Football and a cold one — no break-ins, fist fights, cops banging on the crumbling exterior of the Bikernet headquarters, nada. Sure, my plate was full with six
BIKERNET NEWS FLASH–EVERYONE GOES CHAPTER 11Damn,I left the highrise, executive board room, life of Easyriders to slow down, and instead have become a speed freak and go faster every day. At least the commute is 20 feet instead of 45 miles, there’s no tele-conferencing and no memos. It’s all phone, fax and e-mail. Orwell goes
BIKERNET NEWS FLASH–ULTIMATE TECH TIP REVEALED Hey,Last weekend Custom Chrome rolled out the diamond plate for all its major dealers across the country and Europe to allow them to view the inner workings of the largest aftermarket distributor on the planet devoted to getting custom parts to their customers fast. It’s a gathering of manufacturers
BIKERNET NEWS FLASH–GUNFIRE ROCKS THE HEADQUARTERSHey,Life in the ghetto is never dull. I don’t know how to explain this, except to rattle on and hope you get the gist of the story. We had a box of chrome parts of good news this week. The Street Stalker is sold for enough to print Sam “Chopper”
September 28, 2000 Read More »
BIKERNET NEWS FLASH–TITAN OFFERS TO BUY GENERAL MOTORS! The week started calmly enough. I hit the Ink Slingers Ball with the dark-haired one and enjoyed the vast array of tattoo art. I was most impressed with the Cori Miller crew’s work from Six Feet Under Tattoo in Upland, Calif. Samson exhaust system came on board
September 21, 2000 Read More »
BIKERNET NEWS FLASH–HARLEY-DAVIDSON AWARDS BIKERNET FIRST TWIN CAM, 100-INCH FXR–CONGRATULATIONS MEN!It’s a dewy morning. Last night a blanket of fog rolled in over the hot harbor. It was a bizarre sight, like some sort of acid rain headed our way. First the coastline was covered, then the massive container cranes, then the channel, then the
September 14, 2000 Read More »
BIKERNET NEWS FLASH–GORE PROMISES TO ABOLISH ALL HELMET LAWS–YIPEE!Why are there always spectacular sunrises over the harbor? She rolled on top of me this morning before either one of us was awake. Where did she come from? Did she slip into the headquarters in the night? I couldn’t figure it out, but suddenly I didn’t
BIKERNET NEWS FLASH–SEX SCANDAL ROCKS BIKERNET–WE HOPEI was just sitting here when she came to the door. I’m hammering away on the keyboard, concerned that we don’t have enough images for the news this week, thinking about the Labor Day weekend and all the treachery it holds: traffic jams, Nuutboy’s party in Idyllwild, the Four
BIKERNET NEWS FLASH–NEW WEBMASTER ASSISANATES STAFF MEMBERThere’s not a lot we can report currently. The headquarters are still wrapped in that yellow tape printed with little grinning skulls. All I can say is that we were having a board meeting in the garage when the hiss of a .22 short pierced the air and our
BIKERNET NEWS FLASH–BIKERNET STAFFER RIDES RIGID TO STURGIS AND SURVIVESThe 60th anniversary Black Hills Rally has been over for a week, and like an ant hill the minions are still scurring from the nectar nest in the Badlands. What a rally. More people, motorcycles, vendors, women, T-shirts, and bars than ever before. Hell, I’m still
BIKERNET NEWS Hey, I’m innocent, I tell ya. I’m working every night on the sleek Daytec Blue Flame. I try to squeeze in a workout every other day. The joints to hit along the way to the wayward badlands are lined up and Markus came out to memorialize the bike with his photographic talents. Sometime,
BIKERNET NEWS FLASH–BANDIT CANCELS ZEBRA’S ROOM IN STURGIS–CONSPIRACY FOILED AS PROBE DISCOVERS FOUL PLAY Hey,I’m innocent, I tell you. Fortunately a reasonable officer let me off that night and I’m back at the keyboard. Two days ago the Blue Flame was loaded into Japanese Jay’s hammered ’78 Ranchero, and we hauled out to smog-ridden, bleak,
BIKERNET NEWS FLASH–BANDIT ARRESTED ON THE BACK STREETS OF SAN PEDRO Hey, I’m telling you I was innocent. Phil Ross of Supermax belt drives was with me, he can tell you, and the dark haired beauty, well she was there, too. I’ve been working like a mad dog on the Blue Bomb for Sturgis everyday,
BIKERNET NEWS FLASH–BIKERNET HEADQUARTERS ATTACKED BY DEVIL DOLLS MCHey,Short week, short time to Sturgis, life’s bananas. I’d tell you about the 4th of July weekend, but you wouldn’t believe it. I’d tell you about the plans for this weekend, but they’re too hectic, I’d tell you about my bike build for Sturgis, but I’m frustrated,
BIKERNET NEWS FLASH–WIN SHITHERE QUICK, THE REST OF THE STAFF HAS BEEN ARRESTEDIt’s 2:45 a.m. and I’m just stumbling in the door. The week’s beenhectic, and every afternoon I’ve hit a dealership for parts. Agent Zebra’sbike is almost ready for wire and a test ride. While I order parts and waitfor shipments for my Daytec
BIKERNET NEWS–STURGIS 2000CHOP-OFF COMPETITORS INVESTIGATED BY THE DEAHey,Where to start? The heat in the garage has been severe lately. AsZebra’s bike takes shape under Wrench’s tutelage and expertise it’s readyfor lines and wiring, although we’re still digging in the garage for aprimary drive system. Shortly there will be a tech on the site about thenew
BIKERNET NEWSFLASH–STURGIS 2000 CHALLENGE WAY BEHIND SCHEDULE–DEATH THREATSI wish I knew what I was doing half the time. After Laughlin, Iwished I had my reliable Street Stalker at home, or still had the RoadKing, then I looked at my watch, then at the calendar, then at the girlbeside me in bed, then the phone rang.
BIKERNET NEWS FLASH–BIKERNET STAFF REVOLTS, HEADS TO LAUGHLIN IN DEAD HEAT I’m in a daze. As I fix one twisted item on the Touring Chopper, another prospective problem jumps out at me. The ride to Laughlin is hours away. Yesterday I rode out to Rivera in Whittier. Buck Lovell has asked me to come out
BIKERNET NEWS FLASH–BIKERNET HEADQUARTERS RAIDED BY HOLLYWOOD EXECUTIVES AND SAN PEDRO POLICE Hey, I’m just a guy doing a job in a San Pedro ghetto. It’s a lonely vocation most of the time, hammering away at the keyboard 14 hours a day, and usually not accomplishing much. Sure I knock off to stumble into the
BIKERNET NEWS FLASH–TITAN, HARLEY-DAVIDSON, AND EXCELSIOR-HENDERSON TO MEET FACE TO FACE ON JERRY SPRINGER Hey, it’s almost Friday. Friday, the devil’s day of escape from the mundane to a night of sin and the deepest debauchery. I can’t wait. The last couple of weeks have been high pressure, and I left the corporate world to
BIKERNET NEWS FLASH–JAY LENO, JON TOWLE, BILL CLINTON, AGENT ZEBRA AND THE HANLON BROTHERS IN MEGA BIKERNET WRESTLING DEATH MATCH The fog laid over the harbor like a blanket of doom as I returned to the shed. All seemed calm except for the cowboy-boot sized box on the leaning deck, and I could swear it
BIKERNET NEWS FLASH–Excelsior May Be Back There I was in Tucson, Arizona, alone in a Mexican restaurant eating dry beef and beans, and she walked in. Suddenly I forgot that I had left L.A. without a jacket, the temps had dropped to 40 degrees and it had begun to hail. I looked at my margarita
BIKERNET NEWS FLASH–Daytona News and Such Hey, We’re coming out with the news a day early this week, because tomorrow will be bananas. Yes, tomorrow we’ll be spending the entire day at Jesse James, shooting the shit out of everything: There’s that bike he just built; we need another segment of the Great Chop-Off between
