SEXY SUNDAY POST TO GET YOU STARTED FOR September 7, 2014

 

 

I’m feeling sort of overwhelmed. I need to take care of our Bonneville Sponsors, finish the last chapter of a book, wrap-up my final 2014 Bonneville report, handle shipping to a couple of brothers, deal with business, work on a Saddlemen story, check with the staff on content issues, buy a new radio for the Bikernet Gym (I destroyed the last one), watch the budget, and mo’.

 

 

It’s going to be a helluva week, and Andrew, our apparel line master is planning the run to Las Vegas Bikefest. Hell, I just read that the pricing for prostitutes has dropped. I need to find one who will take care of an old biker.

This is a quirky Sunday Post, so hang on.

 

 

 

 

BIKERNET BAD JOKE LIBRARY OPEN ON SUNDAYS–A man and his wife were awakened at 3:00 am by a loud pounding on the door. The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken stranger, standing in the pouring rain, is asking for a push.

 

“Not a chance,” says the husband, “it is 3:00 in the morning!” He slams the door and returns to bed.

 

“Who was that?” asked his wife.

 

“Just some drunken guy asking for a push,” he answers.

 

“Did you help him?” she asks.

 

“No, I did not, it is 3:00 in the morning and it is pouring rain out there!” 

 

“Well, you have a short memory,” says his wife.

 

“Can’t you remember about three months ago when we broke down, and those two guys helped us? I think you should help him, and you should be ashamed of yourself!”

 

The man does as he is told, gets dressed, and goes out into the pounding rain. He calls out into the dark, “Hello, are you still there?”

 

“Yes,” comes back the answer.”Do you still need a push?” calls out the husband.

 

“Yes, please!” Comes the reply from the dark.

 

“Where are you?” asks the husband. “Over here on the swing,” replied the drunk.

 

–from Jerry and Rogue

 

 

 

BRAND New Bikernet Reader Comment!—

 

 

I met Scotty in Sturgis 3 or 4 years ago and enjoy his company a lot more every year. I’m on the road now, and I think I’m starting to get it.  Rock on Scotty, see you in a couple weeks.  

 

Tate

Port Aransas, TX

 

 

 

ULTIMATE BUILDER SHOW WINNING PROFILE OF THE WEEK–Joel Gurath wins MOD Harley at Harley’s 111th,   Gurath walks away with the MOD Harley Award at Harley-Davidson’s 111th Anniversary Milwaukee didn’t know what hit it when Harley enthusiasts mobbed the 3rd Annual Harley-Davidson Museum Invitational Custom Bike Pro Show in Harley’s hometown. 

 

Magnificent custom rides were on display by builders from throughout the nation, revving riders’ desires to  customize their individual sleds. Five former 1st place winners and 3 debut bikes were on display, a full 2M of custom sleds in one gorgeous hall.

 

Joel Gurath of Backbone Built Bikes entered his 2005 Harley-Davidson Softail old school style ride in an eye-popping green and black color combination. His big wheel front end, a one-off 26-inch Christopoly MAD Wheel, coordinated with his rear one-off 18-inch Solid MAD Wheel, and helped make his ride an eye-turner. His bike looked and sat right.

 

 

The engine is an H-D Twin Cam 955, with 10.5:1 Forged Pistons, SE Heads, SE Cams, SE Push Rods, Compression releases, 45 Mikuni Carb, SE Clutch Kit, H-D Controls and stainless brakes. 

 

Sleek and beautiful, this is a bike begging to be ridden, and we all wanted to feel the power running down the road. Joel’s bike looks and sits right.

 

Harley-Davidson hosts the show in their seasonal climate-controlled tent called Chrome, with floor to ceiling glass windows. Three gorgeous chandeliers light the custom sleds.

 

 

–Jeffrey Najar, Partner

Biker Pros

c. 919-450-5060

 

 

 

 

DIXIE BELLE CRUISE CONTEST–I hope you don’t mind, but I submitted your name for a drawing for a 7-day cruise. I can assure you that you will not receive any follow-up phone calls and no representative will come to your door.

 

Your chance of winning is exceptionally high.

 

This is a 7-day cruise (7 days and 6 nights) aboard the brand new Ozark Dixie Belle of the Gypsy Queen Line. All transfers from paved roads to port, lodging, food and drink (even one dinner at the Captain’s Table as his personal guest) are included in the prize!

Good  luck. I hope you win. A picture of the Ozark Dixie Belle and all her amenities are shown below.

 

 

 

 

 

  

Just remember, I don’t do this for just anybody. . . .  

 

–from Jim Waggaman

 

 

 

BIKERNET BAD JOKE LIBRARY STILL OPEN–A guy walks into a bar in West Virginia and orders a white wine.

All the hillbillies sitting around the bar look up from their beer and whiskey, expecting to see some pitiful Yankee from the north.

The bartender says, “You ain’t from around here, are ya?” 

The guy says, “No, I’m from Canada.” 

The bartender says, “What do you do in Canada?”

 

The guy says, “I’m a taxidermist.” 

The bartender says, “A taxidermist? What in the hell is a taxidermist? Do you drive a taxi?” 

“No,” says the Canadian “I don’t drive a taxi, I mount animals.”

 

The bartender grins and hollers, “It’s okay boys. He’s one of us.”

 

–from Jim Waggaman

 

 

 

BIKERNET UNIVERSITY SUNDAY WORD TO AVOID AT ALL COSTS–TROTH

trawth, trohth

 

1. one’s word or promise, especially in engaging oneself to marry. 

2. faithfulness, fidelity, or loyalty: by my troth.

 

— Laurence Sterne, The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman, 1767

 

Troth entered English in the 1100s from the Middle English trowthe, trouthe meaning “truth.” It ultimately comes from the Old English treowth.

 

 

 

BIKERNET AUSTRALIAN UNDERCOVER NEW AGENT REPORT— Aussie High Court reserves judgement.

 

Another senior legal figure has criticized the “undesirable” wording of Queensland’s controversial anti-biker/anti-association laws, but rejects suggestions the crackdown is unconstitutional.

 

Hells Angels Brisbane member Stefan Kuczborski is challenging in the High Court the validity of the Newman government’s Vicious Lawless Association Disestablishment (VLAD) Act and other draconian new legal provisions targeting bikers.

 

The legislative crackdown was rushed through Queensland parliament in October last year after a public biker brawl in the Gold Coast’s restaurant precinct.

 

Late this morning, the full bench of the High Court reserved its judgement, after one and a half days of hearings in Brisbane.

 

Chief Justice Robert French and Justice Kenneth Hayne yesterday questioned the wording of the VLAD Act, which does not define “vicious” nor “lawless”, and suggested the drafting was “distracting.”

 

Outside court solicitor Zeke Bentley, for Hells Angel member Stefan Kuczborski, said he felt the seven High Court judges gave the challenge a fair hearing.

 

“I certainly think the judges expressed a number of concerns about this legislation and I think they gave us a good hearing,” he told reporters.

 

“We just look forward to the result, and hopefully an expeditious one because a lot of people are sweating on this.”

 

Western Australia’s solicitor-general Grant Donaldson SC said in his submission the colorful language of the VLAD Act confused rather than clarified its motive.

 

However, Mr. Donaldson said that despite the “undesirable, tendentious terminology” littered throughout the law, it was not constitutionally invalid, as argued by Mr Kuczborski’s legal team.

 

Led by barrister Ken Fleming QC, the bikers key argument is that the declaration by Queensland parliament of 26 motorcycle clubs as “criminal” denied participants of those groups equality before the law.

 

And Mr Fleming argued that the courts should make such determinations, not the parliament nor the Newman government.

 

The declarations mean that those found to be participants of such groups are subject to much longer jail sentences than non-participants for the same offences, such as riot, affray, and grievous bodily harm, even though the crime might have nothing to do with their membership of a motorcycle club.

 

The High Court challenge is funded by the United Motorcycle Council. It is hoping to have the VLAD Act, certain new offences in the Queensland Criminal Code — such as those making it illegal for three or more bikers to knowingly meet in public — and extra restrictions in the Liquor Act, declared invalid.

 

The state of Queensland, as well as representatives for the Attorneys-General of the Commonwealth, New South Wales, Victoria, South Australia, Western Australia and the Northern Territory, are all opposing the Hells Angel’s action.

 

Shortly before midday, Chief Justice French announced the court would reserve its judgment. There is no indication as to how long such a ruling will take to be handed down, but it’s understood there are a number of criminal cases on hold pending the outcome.

 

 

 

SUNDAY GUN NUT ALERT— Harry Reid Trying to Use Constitutional Amendment to Silence NRA, its Members, and Free Speech.

 

In January 2010, the U.S. Supreme Court handed down a key decision in the case of Citizens United v. Federal Election Commission.  The decision removed unconstitutional restrictions on the ability to speak freely at election time of grassroots groups like NRA and others. But now, some are trying to reverse the decision–and while they recognize that they must amend the Constitution to do so, their amendment would gut the First Amendment rights of organized political groups as we know them.

 

The late Sen. Paul Wellstone had said during the original debate over the legislation at issue in Citizens United that it was his intention to silence groups like the NRA. While Wellstone singled out the NRA, this law delivered a clear message to all American citizens: “Keep your mouths shut and stay out of our politics.”

 

The court declared unconstitutional the parts of the law that had been enacted for the explicit purpose of silencing the NRA and its members. Of course, the gun-banners in the White House and Congress opposed the decision because it thwarted their plans. 

 

Now, U.S. Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (D-Nev.) is aggressively trying to reverse the Citizens United decision by pushing “Senate Joint Resolution 19,” a proposed “amendment to the Constitution of the United States relating to contributions and expenditures intended to affect elections.”

 

As the title of the proposed constitutional amendment suggests, S.J.R. 19 is intended to allow anti-gunners in Congress to silence their critics and to control the gun “debate.”  S.J.R. 19 would authorize burdensome federal and state regulation–or outright prohibition–of spending by corporations and other legal entities (like NRA) to do what many were created to do: protect the rights of their members at the ballot box.  Prominent constitutional scholar Floyd Abrams said of S.J.R. 19, “It is intended to limit speech about elections and it would do just that….”  

 

The U.S. Senate could vote on the measure as early as next week.  NRA strongly opposes S.J.R. 19 and will score legislators’ votes on the proposed amendment.  Please take action NOW to stop this proposed constitutional amendment that would severely restrict free speech during elections.  Please immediately contact your U.S. Senators and tell them to OPPOSE Senate Joint Resolution 19.   

 

You can contact your U.S. Senators by using the “Write Your Lawmakers” tool at www.NRAILA.org.  You may also contact your Senators by phone at (202) 224-3121.

 

 

 

 

BANDIT’S CANTINA PHOTO OF THE WEEK--Can’t remember where I came across this photo but hope this puts a smile on your face and has the same deep emotional effect on you as it has to me.  Don’t care what your hobby or sport this photo pretty much says it all. 

 

You could write volumes based on what’s behind those eyes. And for those of us still above ground, we’ve all been there.

 

–from Bob Clark

 

 

 

CANTINA PLANS FOR INTERIOR IMPROVEMENTS-–

I realize she’s not your type…but…I was wondering what you thought of the flooring?

 

–from Jim Waggaman

 

 

 

 

THIS IS A ONE-TIME-ONLY EVENT!

 

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**** CANNONBALL website HERE:  http://www.motorcyclecannonball.com/

 

 

 

BIKERNET BAD JOKE LIBRARY AUSTRALIAN OFFICE–A tourist was driving through the Outback when he noticed a man on the side of the road having sex with a kangaroo.

 

A few kilometers further on, he came upon a small town, parked his bike and went into

the pub for a drink. Sitting at the bar, he looked around and noticed a one legged guy in the corner masturbating without a care in the world.

 

The tourist turned to the barman and said:  “What sort of country is this?! A few

kilometers down the road there was a guy having sex with a kangaroo, and that guy

in the corner is masturbating in full view of everyone!”

 

The barman said, “You heartless bastard. He’s only got one leg.  How do you 

Expect him to catch a kangaroo?”

 

–from Jim Waggaman

 

 

 

LIFE IS STRANGE AND WONDERFUL—It’s quirky and maddening. Even today, after thousands of years we are still trying to figure it out.

 

 

I find more and more that it’s difficult for folks to change. The key is the desire to change for the better. A young man called the other day, because I gave him some guidance with his job. He recognized an issue from his childhood, which had been holding him back for decades. He finally came to grips with it. He was blown away.

 

I try to look for inspiration everywhere. In Bonneville I was inspired by Wink Eller, who was in a terrible accident with a deer, in his beautiful hot rod, on the way to Speed Week. His injuries were severe (I won’t gross you out with the details), but as soon as he could crawl out of the hospital bed he started to repair his hot rod and prepare to come to Bonneville for the Motorcycle Speed trials. 

 

Wink built and installed a 37-gallon gas tank, so he could fill up at home in California and drive straight through to Bonneville. Less than three weeks after his accident he stood on the salt with the other racers, albeit slightly shaky, but he was on hand supporting the bros. He helped us with Mikuni tuning. An amazing human being.

 

Hang on for next week. We are hoping to cover Paughco’s touring frame manufacturing process, with Richard’s bike recovery process. We have a plan. 

 

 

Then we will bring you an exclusive interview with the Pope  of Pipes, Dave Rash, from D&D Exhaust fame.

 

 

And we hope to start rebuilding this 125 cc Rapido for our Bonneville pit bike.

 

Keep the faith! 

 

And Ride Free, Forever,

–Bandit