I nodded.
“This is a want ad from the Sunday Afghan Tribune. It says ‘Wanted, Bin Laden wants apartment in the city of Kabul surrounded by helpless civilians to hide in along with 40 Taliban leaders. It needs to have no running water, but must have cable television and Internet hook ups for 40 computers.'”
I nodded to the young man who glanced over his shoulder then looked back at me, “I know, you’ll know what to do with it.”
I nodded again and we left the building quietly. Let’s get to the news.
Sunday Blonde Joke
This blonde goes into a restaurant and notices there’s ?a “peel and win” sticker on her coffee cup. So she peels ?it off and starts screaming, I’ve won a motor home! ?I’ve won a motor home!”
?The waitress says, “That’s impossible. ?The biggest prize is a mini-van.”
?But the blonde keeps screaming, “I’ve won a ?motor home! ?I’ve won a motor home.”
?Finally the manager comes over and says, “Ma’am, I’m ?sorry, but you’re mistaken. You couldn’t possibly have ?won a motor home because we didn’t have that as a prize!”
?The blonde says, “No it’s not a mistake. I’ve won a ?motor home!” And she’s hands the ticket to the ?manager and he reads . . . . . . . ?. WIN A BAGEL
–Chris T.
Report On Farrow’s H-D
Finally had some vacation time… on the way home to Cleveland we got to pause at Farrow’s H-D in Columbus. For me, this is where it all began.????? (My Dad wrenched on vintage iron there in the 1950’s.)
Farrow’s is the oldest continuously-operated hawg dealership in the USA. They are set to celebrate 90 of service years in April, 2002. It was like a time-warp adventure to see the old place again… My last visit would’ve been twenty years ago. Rest assured that the bikes and babes were better than ever. Ol’ Alan Dail Farrow would be proud. His legacy has continued to rock the midwest since 1912!
–Rod Ice? ?????
Peace Rally Recommendations
The next time you happen upon a peace rally , here’s how you teach them that force is sometimes needed:
1) Approach a student who is shouting about peace and saying that there should be no retaliation.
2) Engage in brief conversation, ask him if military force is appropriate.
3) When he says “No,” ask, “why not?”
4) He’ll say something like, “Because that would just cause more innocent deaths, which would be awful and we should not cause more violence.”
5) When he’s in mid-sentence, punch him in the face.
6) When he gets back up to hit you, point out that it would be contrary to his values to strike you, because that would be awful and he should not cause more violence.
7) Wait until he agrees that he has pledged not to commit additional violence.
8) Punch him in the face again, harder this time. Repeat steps 5 through 8 until he understands that sometimes it is necessary to hit back.
Biketoberfest 2001
The Daytona Beach Florida event is now history. There was a lot of concern going into this event as it was being used as a barometer for some of the other Biker events that will be following. Neither war or the economy seemed to have a affect on the Bikers as they continued to show up in strong numbers. The local news paper The Daytona Beach News-Journal said “Biketoberfest crowds seem large as ever”. I was there and I agree. The article further says it was at least as large as last years crowd of 100,000. Main Street, Bars, Events, Contests all crowded.
A lot of nice new scooters many of them with the flag theme painted on them lined the streets and parking lots. Others had flags waving and many people were wearing patriotic clothing. Bikers have always been a patriotic group and they were showing it. They obviously were spending money also as numerous business were stating so and said it came at a time they were hurting.
Other things I noticed was A LOT OF FEMALE RIDERS (LOVE IT), Gray Beards and motor homes. Well I hope every one that made it had as much fun as I did. If you didn’t go you made a mistake. But Daytona Bike Week is not that far away and there are also events and toy runs all over the country so GET OUT AND ENJOY.
Ride Safe
–ROGUE
TEAM VESCO returns World?LandSpeed Record for wheel-driven vehicles to USA at 458 MPH
October 18, 2001, Bonneville Salt Flats — Land speed racer Don Vesco, driving the Turbinator, built by brother Rick Vesco, demolished a near four-decade stranglehold on the?turbine-powered wheel-driven record with an average of 458.440 mph in the mile and 458.208 mph in the kilometer.
The official record?certification process for the T-III category by the FIA in Geneva, Switzerland, has already been initiated and once completed, will remove Britain’s Donald Campbell as “top dog.”
Don Vesco is the first and only person in the history of motorsports to have held top honors for both automotive and motorcycle (318mph set in 1978 and held for 13 years)?world land speed records.
More Details to Come!
“LandSpeed” Louise Ann Noeth
LandSpeed Productions
Telling Stories with Words and Pictures
Bad Joke Of The Weekend
A young bloke has started work on a property, and the boss sends him up the back paddocks to do some fencing work, but come evening he’s half an hour late. The boss gets on the CB radio to check if he’s all right.
“I’ve got a problem, Boss. I’m stuck here. I’ve hit a pig!”
“Ah well, these things happen sometimes,” the boss says. “Just drag the carcass off the road so nobody else hits it in the dark.”
“But he’s not dead, boss. He’s gotten tangled up on the bull bar, and I’ve tried to untangle him, but he’s kicking and squealing, and he’s real big boss. I’m afraid he’s gonna hurt me!”
“Never mind,” says the boss. “There’s a .303 under the tarp in the back. Get that out and shoot him. Then drag the carcass off the road and come on home.” “Okay, boss.”
Another half an hour goes by, but there’s still not a peep from the young fella. The boss gets back on the CB. “What’s the problem, son?”
“Well, I did what you said boss, but I’m still stuck.”
“What’s up? Did you drag the pig off the road like I said?”
“Yeah boss, but his motorcycle is still jammed under the truck.”
–CA
There’s a full investigation of this humor. We will bring the perpetrator to justice.–Bandit
A Note From The Bikernet Sifu
How are you behaving with your ribs and stuff. ??A young man like you should be recovered ?with no side pains from laughing. ?
?Also, I’m still waiting for you to start training with me at the IMB Academy. ?
Can we be In The Wind this coming weekend? ?There is a Studio City Cruise 4 Kids run this Sunday Oct. 28, from El Segundo to Pacific Hwy to Malibu Canyon and end at the CBS Studio Center. ??Let me know if you are up for this run. Aloha, Dick Bondano
Yes, master. As you wish.–Bandit
Brother Looking For Engine To Rebuild
Hey Bandit, hope things are going good out there? Walking around Ok? I am looking to build a Hardtail, with a Shovel or Pan engine. Do you know of any engines? Could use something to rebuild. Could you let me know on this?
Thanks Man, Mo mohd2@altavista
I better be in good shape, the master is calling me back to training.–Bandit
Leno’s Harley raises $360,200 For Attack Victims
A celebrity-autographed motorcycle and matching truck put up for auction by Jay Leno drew a top bid of $360,200 that will benefit victims of the Sept. 11 attacks on the World Trade Center, the comedian’s publicist said Thursday.
“God Bless that person for helping out,” Leno said on his show Wednesday night. All proceeds from the sale will go to the Twin Towers Fund.
The motorcycle, purchased by Leno in July, is a Harley FXDL Dyna Low Rider that has been autographed by dozens of Hollywood stars, including Arnold Schwarzenegger, Denzel Washington, Nicole Kidman, Nicolas Cage, Salma Hayek, John Travolta, Sylvester Stallone, Samuel L. Jackson, Tom Cruise, Angelina Jolie, Ellen DeGeneres and Tim Allen.
The bike is accompanied by a matching limited-edition Ford Harley-Davidson F-150 SuperCrew, the second in a series of trucks jointly developed by the two companies.
Exit Notes
The Guggenheim is worth checking out. Some of the oldest motorcycles in history are on display and fascinating rides from a mechanical perspective. Vegas has turned into some sort of mystery full of some of the most magnificent building and hotels on earth coupled with sleazy sex and goofballs. Of course some of the most beautiful women on earth are there in droves. We tripped on some girls dancing nude behind silk screens in a bar called Shadows while watching two award winning bartenders do acrobats with bottles. The races were a gas and the nights full of hot sex. We jammed out with the crew from JIMS and watched Geoff from Joker race. Both companies back All-Harley drag racing to the hilt. Friday night we partied with the racers at the Harley-Davidson cafe and were bless to meet Helen Wolfe for the first time in person. She’s the Bikernet Drag Racing Correspondent, and her man, Mailman is a racer. Watch for her coverage this week. Have a helluva week.–Bandit
