Bikernet Documentary About To Be Filmed For Discovery If you’ve wondered why Bikernet hasn’t been featured on the Discovery Channel it might have something to do with the man featured above. That’s Mike Lichter, a well known photographer for Bikernet and Easyriders. Mike has his own web site where you can purchase historic limited edition prints from the archives of Easyriders, his own postcard selection and more.
Mike and I have been working from time to time on a book of club member stories from various old school organizations around the country. He was filmed this weekend shooting portraits of a member of the Scorpions MC in Texas. The Discovery Channel was there, and they may follow us as we ride from club to club to finish this historic work.
BIKERNET PHILOSOPHY
A bum, who obviously has seen more than his share of hard times, approaches a well-dressed gentleman on the street. “Hey, Buddy, can you spare two dollars?”
The well-dressed gentleman responds, “You are not going to spend it on liquor are you?”
“No, sir, I don’t drink,” retorts the bum. ” You are not going to throw it away gambling, are you?” asks the gentleman.
“No way, I don’t gamble,” answers the bum.
“You wouldn’t waste the money at a golf course for greens fees, would you?” asks the man.
“Never,” says the bum, “I don’t play golf.”
The man asks the bum if he would like to come home with him for a home cooked meal. The bum accepts eagerly. While they are heading for the man’s house, the bum’s curiosity gets the better of him. Isn’t your wife going to be angry when she sees a guy like me at your table?”
“Probably,” says the man, “but it will be worth it. I want her to see what happens to a guy who doesn’t drink, gamble or play golf. ”
— Jim W. Williams
C/E 187th Assault Helicopter Co.-71
–from CarlR
Cantina Memorbilia Continues To Grow Through the efforts of Bob Tronolone, located deep in the California Desert, we have established a growing link to rare archival motorcycle material. We’re building the Cantina to be a place where riders can come for some fun, relaxation and escape the bullshit.
In other words The Cantina is Home for you and me, and I’m slapping more shit on the walls as fast as I can find it. Thanks Bob.
BIKERNET WRITING CONTEST
For those of you who do not know, Bulwer-Lytton wrote The Last Days of Pompeii, which opens with the famous line “It was a dark and stormy night.” Hence the contest.
These are the 10 winners of this year’s Bulwer-Lytton contest (run by the English Dept of San Jose State University), wherein one writes only the first line of a bad novel.
10) “As a scientist, Throckmorton knew that if he were ever to break wind in the echo chamber he would never hear the end of it.”
9) “Just beyond the Narrows the river widens.”
8) “With a curvaceous figure that Venus would have envied, a tanned, unblemished oval face framed with lustrous thick brown hair, deep azure-blue eyes fringed with long black lashes, perfect teeth that vied for competition, and a small straight nose, Marilee had a beauty that defied description.”
7) “Andre, a simple peasant, had only one thing on his mind as he crept along the East wall: ‘Andre creep… Andre creep… Andre creep.'”
6) “Stanislaus Smedley, a man always on the cutting edge of narcissism, was about to give his body and soul to a back alley sex-change surgeon to become the woman he loved.”
5) “Although Sarah had an abnormal fear of mice, it did not keep her from eeking out a living at a local pet store.”
4) “Stanley looked quite bored and somewhat detached, but then penguins often do.”
3) “Like an over-ripe beefsteak tomato rimmed with cottage cheese, the corpulent remains of Santa Claus lay dead on the hotel floor.”
2) “Mike Hardware was the kind of private eye who didn’t know the meaning of the word ‘fear’; a man who could laugh in the face of danger and spit in the eye of death — in short, a moron with suicidal tendencies.”
AND THE WINNER IS…
1) “The sun oozed over the horizon, shoved aside darkness, crept along the greensward, and, with sickly fingers, pushed through the castle window, revealing the pillaged princess, hand at throat, crown asunder, gaping in frenzied horror at the sated, sodden amphibian lying beside her, disbelieving the magnitude of the frog’s deception, screaming madly, ‘You lied!'”
–from Ray Russel
I got drunk with this guy Jimmy on Bora Bora after the race at Bloody Mary’s. He kept singing something about Cheeseburgers in Paradise and kept mumbling something about a buffett??? —TBear
Bikers In Paradise–I don?t want to give away too much, mostly because so much is still in the works, I myself don?t have all information yet. But, Tbear has been working on a deal for Bikernet readers that will allow something like 20 couples to fly to the Tahitian Islands for six days, have motorcycles waiting, and get a personal tour of the Island by the local club there. As I said, not enough info to go into much more detail but the cost will be ridiculously cheap and will help a charity for kids on the Islands. Stay tuned, more to come?
KEVIN FLYNN’S 49 PAN FROM NIAGARA FALLS N.Y.
BANDIT HERE ARE SOME SHOTS OF MY BIKE, I’VE OWNED THIS BIKE SINCE 1982 AND WILL DIE WITH IT.THE MOTOR IS A 49, THE TRANS.IS A 65, FRAME IS A 56,TANKS ARE 53s,AND THE FRONTEND IS FROM A 97 BADBOY.THE PAN RUNS A BELT, AND HAS A 150 AVON IN THE BACK.PAINT IS BY OWNER.IT TOOK FIRST AT THE 2000 EASYRIDER BOARDWALK SHOW IN DAYTONA (BIKETOBERFEST)IN THE PANHEAD DIV.
We’re hunting for shot.
NEVER GET A SPEEDING TICKET AGAIN !!!
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–“RadarRob”
Rev Tech DFO Report
I promised to get back to you when I got through testing out this DFO. I visited the Techillusion site and studied their unit as well as the DFO and they appear to be virtually the same unit. I tried Revtech’s suggested setup, Techillusion’s suggested setup , Hot Rod Bikes Magazine’s suggested setup and my own tested setup. I settled for my own as it seemed to fit my riding style the best and I think that therein lies the crux of the matter: There is no one “right” setup for this unit. You have to test it out several different ways and find the one that suits your riding style.
The setup I settled on for my 2001 Road King with Stage One kit added was to set the pots as follows: Upper row – 1o’clock left pot….4o’clock middle pot….4 o’clock right pot. The lone pot on the lower row was set at 4 o’clock.
This closely matches the Hot Rod Bikes Mag article suggested settings of 1 – 3 – 4 with the lower lone pot being set at 4 (all of those are clock settings). I guess if anyone asked me how to do it, I would steer them to the TechIllusions website to read their instructions…they are pretty good!
Anyway, I hope this helps someone besides myself out if they decide to try out a DFO.
–Plugger
The Rev Tech DFO unit is a fuel injection modification unit from Custom Chrome that allows tuning to modified bikes without the equipment necessary for a Power Commander.
Sunday Quote
“People are more violently opposed to fur than leather because it’s safer to harass rich women than motorcycle gangs.”
–from Darcy B.
Next Week Bikertoberfest Report Unvieled We have articles from Daytona newspapers, Rogue, Crazy Horse and Frank Kaisler covering everything from the financial numbers to politics behind HORSE magazine. I don’t understand what a horse mag has to do with bikes either, but it will all explode onto the site next week.
Subject: Painless Birth
A married couple went to he hospital to have their baby delivered. Upon their arrival, the doctor said he had invented a new machine that would transfer a portion of the mother’s labor pain to the father. He asked if they were willing to try it out. They were both very much in favor of it.
The doctor set the pain transfer dial to 10% for starters, explaining that even 10% was probably more pain than the father had ever experienced before.
As the labor progressed, the husband felt fine and asked the doctor to go ahead and bump it up a notch.
The doctor then adjusted the machine to20% pain transfer.
The husband was still feeling fine.
The doctor checked the husband’s blood pressure and was amazed at how well he was doing. At this point they decided to try for 50%.
The husband continued to feel quite well. Since it was obviously helping out his wife considerably, the husband encouraged the doctor to transfer ALL the pain to him.
The wife delivered a healthy baby with virtually no pain. She and her husband were ecstatic.
When they got home, the mailman was dead on their porch.
–from CarlR
That’s It For The Week I’ve got to head out to the garage and play with the exhaust system for the Shrunken FXR. Bikes have been buzzing past the Bikernet Headquarters all day heading towards Walkers Cafe for Corona’s and old school hamburgers.
Should I hit the road or weld? Hell I don’t know. In a couple of weeks the FXR will be close to some final metal master work which we may farm out to James Famighetti to finalize. He has that touch.
While he wags his magic wand over some of the metal pieces, I want to jam my Panhead on the lift and dial it in for scooting the streets of Pedro. I don’t mind the flames shooting out of the Mikuni carbs, but when the oil light jumps on at odd times, I need to start digging.
I may have a margarita and tinker in the garage. If you’re on the road, ride like a maniac, but be careful.–Bandit
