I’m a blithering nut case this morning. Too many margaritas last night and not enought sex. Here’s a strange code I came up with one lonely night in the Wilmington ghetto. I started to think about drinking, and I thought, “Why do we drink?” We work our butts off all day, then some of us drink. Then the answer dawned on me, “Because we’re not having sex.”
Okay I’m nuts, but think about it. What would you rather do this evening, drink Jack, beers or whatever, or make love to a beautiful woman? Well? The next question is the deadly one: Why aren’t you crawling in bed with a passionate woman tonight? That’s why we drink.
Alright, I’m going to jump into deep shit. We better hit the news:
Home Built Feature Coming To Bikernet
I?ve been visiting your site daily for a few years now, and am wondering if you might be interested in doing a spread on my bike once it is finished. Bike started out as a HardCore kit. I?ve attached some pictures of it. It should be ready for paint in a couple weeks. Shoot me an E-mail if you are interested.
–Vincent
Sure, we’re interested in your bike and your experience building it. –Bandit
ZEN THOUGHTS FROM JOAN
The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and a leaky tire.
Bikernet Jumper Cables
A guy walks into the bar with a set of jumper cables around his neck.
The bartender eyes him suspiciously and says, “I’ll serve you, but don’t you be starting anything.”
–from Baldbutt
LOUISIANA FREEDOM FIGHTER ALERT
Louisiana is asking for national grassroots help! Here’s a quick summary: Louisiana is currently free. House Version of mandatory helmet law is HB 109. It failed but may be reconsidered!
Senate Version of mandatory helmet law is SB 29. It passed the Senate days ago and is going to the House now. SB 29 had been amended to mandatory helmets for only under 21. The amendments were stripped and the Senate version passed as a universal mandatory helmet law for ALL riders and that’s the language going to the House next. Their session ends June 21.
Help them keep their Freedom of Choice. – Email links and sample letter provided. http://abatepa.org/abate/legislation/sample/LA_2004.htm
Comment from Kevin Zanca, President ABATE LA GNO Chapter: “The legislative assistant said she couldn’t believe the letters , e-mails, and phone calls coming in to oppose SB 29. In her own words she said ” it’s too bad everyone isn’t like this about other issues.” When asked she stated that the against communications had far outnumbered the for calls and that she was shocked at the amount of attention this issue had gotten from the against vote.”
Of course it’s getting attention. Bikers react when their freedoms are threatened! The emails are set up as three quick links. Individual email codes are also there.
Please donate 10 minutes of your time. After all, 10 minutes is a piece of cake – it took 25 YEARS to gain Freedom of Choice in Pennsylvania. If you already wrote, write again! Get your friends to write too.
–Jayne
ABATE of PA
New Paint Schemes From H-D
Here are some pics of the new # 1 paint jobs from H.D. The paint jobs bring back a lot of memories for me.
–Stealth Man
KENNY PRICE RECEIVES LIFETIME ACHIEVEMENT AWARD
American Motorcycle Group: Hot Bike, Hot Rod Bikes, and Street Chopper recently announced the winners of the Lifetime Achievement Awards. Kenny Price, President of Samson Motorcycle Products was there to receive his award. “It is an honor for me to accept this award,” said Kenny. “Making motorcycle exhaust pipes is what I like to do. I can’t believe I could get an award for having fun.”
Each year the three magazines discuss the selection of who will receive the Lifetime Achievement Awards. “While the award winners may feel special at the party, we feel lucky and privileged to be in the position we are to throw it,” says Editor Howard Kelly.
Samson Motorcycle Products designs, markets and manufactures premium quality motorcycle exhausts at their state of the art facilities in Anaheim, CA. Every product has been thoroughly tested to improve performance, enhance appearance and give the sound customers are looking for. As the industry leader in aftermarket exhaust, every part is inspected for the highest quality standards. Samson Motorcycle Products markets products under the Samson, Caliber and Shogun Brand Names. For more information visit our website www.samsonusa.com.
Hollister Independence Rally
This is the Official Web Site of the 57th Anniversary of the Hollister Independence Rally, a motorcycle event which takes place in Hollister, California from July 2nd to July 4th, 2004. This year?s rally will consist of musical entertainment, a bike show, bike games, beer garden and much, much more! This page is dedicated to provide the latest news and information regarding the Hollister Independence Rally and related events.
Check back for the latest news. http://www.big7productions.com/ic1.htm.
New Swept Back Bars From H-D
Here are some pics of the new H.D. Sweep Back bars. They kinda remind you of the old tiller bars that you used to see in the Jammer Handbook.
The more things change the more they stay the same!
–Stealthman
Bikernet Dog Training
Here’s Roberts first phase of graduation….Next is Bomb training…
–Bob T.
Pull Into Work
Right On Time
Nodding To A
Brother As I
Jump In Line
Boss Man Says
Hit The Bricks
Giving Me No Reason
The Fucking Prick
I Knew This Was Coming
But Not Today
Smell Grew Shitier
Every Day
Chicken Shit Mother Fuckers
Couldn’t Talk To Me
Face To Face
Instead They Hid Like Cowards
Hired Another Guy
Just That Simple
I Was Replaced
This Isn’t Over
They Haven’t Seen
The Last Of This
Biker’s Pissed Off Face
I Won’t Stop Until
All Of Their Heads
Are On The Chopping Blocks
Bowing Their Heads
Full Of Fear And Disgrace
It May Take Months
It May Take Years
But I Will force You
MOTHER FUCKERS
To Cry Monster Tears
Composed By Panhead Josh Of Outlaws World
Cantina Sunday Girl, All The Way From Sydney
Gday Bandit, Thought ya might like some pics of my mate Bonnie. She has given her permission for you to publish some of them if ya want.
I am still writing another fiction story for you, been slack, spend too much time in the Yahoo motorcycle chat rooms.
— Kevin Lumley.
Sydney
Oz
Git outta the damn chat rooms and back to that keyboard. Our readers need a Fiction fix.–Bandit
NEWSOFTAIL FAT TIRE KIT FROM BIG BOAR
The new 240 FAT TIRE kit from BIG BOAR allows the conversion from stock tire to MONSTER 240. The kit includes FAT SWINGARM, STRUTLESS STEEL FENDER, ALL REQUIRED OFFSET COMPONENTS FOR EVO OR TWIN CAM, AND A 240 TIRE.
It’s packed with Big Boar quality, and reasonably priced. All you need is the wheel of your choice and you’ll be cured of fat tire envy. Available immediately from:
BIG BOAR PRODUCTS
6289 Corporate park Drive
Loudon, TN 37774
865-458-8640
www.bigboarproducts.com
After his death, Osama bin Laden went to Heaven
There he was greeted by George Washington, who proceeded to slap him across the face and yell at him, “How dare you try to destroy the nation I helped conceive!”
Patrick Henry approached and punched Osama in the nose and shouted, “You wanted to end our liberties but you failed.”
James Madison entered, kicked Osama and said, “This is why I allowed our government to provide for the common defense!”
Thomas Jefferson came in and proceeded to beat Osama many times with a long cane and said, “It was evil men like you that provided me the inspiration to pen the Declaration of Independence!”
These beatings and thrashings continued as John Rudolph, James Monroe and 66 other early Americans came in and unleashed their anger on the Muslim terrorist leader.
As Osama lay bleeding and writhing in unbearable pain an Angel appeared.
Bin Laden wept in pain and said to the Angel, “This is not what you promised me.”
The Angel replied, “I told you there would be 72 Virginians waiting for you up here. What did you think I said?”
–from Rogue
Run For Breath Trophies Rolling In
We are sending you pictures of an award for the 6th Annual Run For Breath “In Memory of Justin Pullin” that Chopper John made for us. Too cool for school, don’t you think!
–Mike (The Stealth)
14 days and counting until the biker wedding of the century!
Teens Push For Helmet Law After Friend Dies Boy Dies After Hitting Head While Riding Skateboard
BLOOMINGTON, Ind. — A group of Indiana teenagers is pushing for a mandatory helmet law for skateboarders after one of their friends died Friday.
Matt Jennings, 14, died after hitting his head while riding his skateboard, television station WRTV reported.
Jennings’ friends are turning their grief into action by collecting names on a petition that they plan to forward to state legislators.
“We have almost 600 signatures, and we’re going to make it a law that you have to wear a helmet when you ride a skateboard. We’re going to call it Matt’s Law,” Jennings’ friend Brittney Sauer said.
Sauer also wrote a letter to Gov. Joe Kernan and President George W. Bush asking that helmet laws be passed in Jennings’ memory.
State Rep. Peggy Welch of Bloomington said she plans to introduce the legislation during next year’s session, the station reported.
Carol Touloukian of the American Academy of Pediatrics is also pushing for a skateboard helmet law. Experts say that helmets are 85 percent effective in preventing serious brain injuries when worn correctly.
–FastFred Ruddock – www.fastfreds.com
ABATE of SC – State Coord – www.abatesc.com
SoLR – Region 2 Director – region2.solriders.com
MRF – State Rep – www.mrf.org
If you need more info on this or any other subject just go to the Sons of Liberty Riders Info Zone http://solriders.com/ or http://solriders.net/index.php
Photo Image Of The Week By RFR
Could you give me your feedback on this image? This is from bike night. I think this picture Kicks Ass!!! It printed great. To me the young lady nailed the pose. There might be things I do not see but I like it!
RFR
You Can’t Get Hurt In A Crash That Never Happens
Today is my birthday, and though I am long past the point when getting older is reason for celebration, I AM pleased to commemorate 40 years of riding street motorcycles without ever crashing. Don’t misunderstand. I’ve crashed lots of bikes, but never on the street or highway…and I’m very proud of that.
Speaking as a minority member of America’s traffic pattern, my ATTITUDE about crashing is the thing that ultimately separates me from all those car people. Lacking the protection of a steel cage, the motorcyclist’s first line of defense includes riding skills, awareness of the dangers in traffic, and concentration on the task at hand. To avoid injury, we must avoid crashing.
Unfortunately, accident avoidance is the lost cause of American motoring. The fundamental logic of street motorcycling – you can’t get hurt in a crash that never happens – seems totally lost on America’s transportation bureaucracy as it annually presides over 43,000 highway fatalities.
How have the bureaucrats failed? Consider two related examples. Driver education in this country is a joke. Public transportation is an even bigger joke. The result? Most Americans need a car to get where they’re going. We therefore feel compelled to give everyone a driver’s license, even though we have no system to actually teach them how to drive. Should we be surprised that the result is multitudes of inept drivers crashing into each other willy-nilly?
Confronted by this monster of their own making, the safetycrats chose a worthwhile but still fundamentally misguided response. Rather than tackle the difficult issue of accident avoidance, they chose instead to simply force the auto industry to make cars more crash-proof. Thus our multitudes of untrained drivers are belted and bagged into giant vehicles that lull them into a complete sense of security. That leaves them free to focus their attention on their cell phones, visor DVD players, and so forth. The LAST thing these people are thinking about is avoiding a crash.
And that brings us back to where we started…to that fundamental truth which SHOULD be the basis for our entire traffic system but instead seems to apply uniquely to motorcycle people. Remember that truth whether you start your trip by grabbing a steering wheel or a set of handlebars: You can’t get hurt in a crash that never happens.
That’s my take…I’d like to hear yours.
— Dave Despain from Wind Tunnel on the Speed Channel
1-866-W-TUNNEL is the number to call Monday – Thursday nights from 10-11pm ET. mailto:Windtunnel@speedtv.com
–from Rogue
Charlotte H-D Bike Show And Wedding Tips
I thought I would drop you a couple of pics from the bike show Saturday at H-D of Charlotte.
The best of show winner was this ’46 WL. Sharp bike.
Another cool bike was this ’57 panhead, my dream bike, because I was born in ’57.
I think this would make a great wedding gift from “THE MEANEST”to me! What do you think? I look good on it!
–Later!
–Stealthman
Look at that miserable bastard. He must be getting married.–Bandit
A Retiree’s Story
After retiring, I went to the social security office to apply for Social Security, the woman behind the counter asked me for my driver’s license to verify my age.
I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at home. I told the woman that I was very sorry but I seemed to have left my wallet at home. “I will have to go home and come back later.”
The woman says, “Unbutton your shirt.” So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair. She says, “That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me” and she processed my Social Security application. When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the social security office.
She says, “You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten disability too.”
–from S&C
RIDL Fights MADD
As a New Member To RIDL I would like to thank all that have joined and are continuing to make this organization grow.
Madd and the DUI Laws are out of hand and something has to be done about it.
–ROGUE
Our organization is growing by leaps and bounds. We had many, many new members join since my last update in April. Thank you all of you for joining us in this battle to fight the unfair DUI laws that have been passed in this country over the last 20 years. I hope you will find the information on our website helpful. In addition, many new members have discovered that our Discussion Forum helps them to work through the issues either themselves, friends or family members face regarding DUIs in this day and age. Take comfort in knowing that at RIDL we do not make you feel like the scourge of the earth that organizations such as MADD, the courts, and your local DMV would have you believe. We know that most people who get DUI’s these days are just average citizens who got trapped by the propaganda we’ve all been spoon-fed for the past 20 years.
Bikernet Zoo
A bear walks into a bar in Billings, Montana and sits down. He bangs on the bar with his paw and demands a beer.
The bartender approaches and says, “We don’t serve beer to bears in bars in Billings.”
The bear, becoming angry, demands again that he be served a beer.
The bartender tells him again, more forcefully, “We don’t serve beer to belligerent bears in bars in Billings.”
The bear, very angry now, says, “If you don’t serve me a beer, I’m going to eat that lady sitting at the end of the bar.”
The bartender says, “Sorry, we don’t serve beer to bellige! rent, bully bears in bars in Billings”
The bear goes to the end of the bar, and, as promised, eats the woman. He comes back to his seat and again demands a beer.
The bartender states, “Sorry, we don’t serve beer to belligerent, bully bears in bars in Billings who are on drugs.”
The bear says, “I’m NOT on drugs.”
………You’re gonna love this………
The bartender says, “You are now. That was a barbitchyouate!
–from Jill Z.
Gary Sleezer A Tribute To A Sarasota Icon
Rossiter’s will be unofficially closing at 12:30 pm Saturday with a skeleton crew till 4pm, in honor of Gary Sleezer’s funeral. Family, friends honor biker Gary Sleezer had been an icon among local Harley-Davidson riders for 25 years
SARASOTA – Every January, hundreds of Harley-Davidson enthusiasts would trek to Gary and Mary Sleezer’s three-acre spread just past Verna Bethany Road in Myakka City for a pig roast that would last a full weekend.
But at 2 p.m. this Saturday, hundreds will gather at Sandy Baptist Memorial Church on Clay Gulley and Sugar Bowl Road not for Gary Sleezer’s annual birthday bash, but to say goodbye to Sleezer, an icon in local Harley-Davidson circles the last 25 years.
The 54-year-old was killed Tuesday in Parrish while testing a 2004 Buell motorcycle for his employer, Rossiter’s Harley-Davidson of Sarasota. Gary Sleezer was attempting to turn left into a parking lot when he was struck by an SUV. No charges will be filed in the crash, according to the Florida Highway Patrol.
At 325 pounds, with a short beard, Gary Sleezer looked so much like everyone’s image of a Harley guy that people would part the way for him as he approached, said Mary Sleezer, his wife of 21 years.
But even though he owned seven Harleys, he was a gentle man, his friends said.
“Gary was a real laid-back guy who would do anything for you,” said Matthew Donley, the service co-foreman at Rossiter’s. “If you needed the shirt off his back, he would give it to you. He was a great guy.”
Local artist Jack Dowd chose Sleezer to model for a biker sculpture with a life-size biker on an actual Harley.
AM I IN TROUBLE?–I didn’t mention riding or bikes in the beginning, but I’m sure guys get the gist of my code. Bikes and riding are a major priority. Ambition and goals are also etched into the list, but at the end of the day, there’s the touch of a woman to make life complete. If not, there’s Jack Daniels. It’s nature’s way, or am I fulla shit?
Have a helluva day. I’ll be welding on the Run For Breath trophy. Need to wrap it up.
Ride Forever,
–Bandit
